Happy birthday to me! [Dragonsong!]

[Rhindeer]

"Oh, I know," Valor said when she complimented him, flashing her a playfully arrogant smile. "But I don't mind you saying it."

It seemed his "blanket cocoon" technique had had the intended effect: Ka'lei wasn't totally recovered, but she looked like she was doing better. He peered at her as she burrowed in, unable to help but think that she looked...really kind of adorable like that. Not the part where she was upset and crying, but the part where she was all bundled up with barely her face poking out. She was an attractive woman, anyone with eyes would notice that, and strong and fierce--but it was this fresh vulnerability that caught him off guard and made his chest hurt.

"You don't need to apologize. Don't apologize for feeling. I did say it effects everyone differently, I just...wasn't prepared. But you didn't upset me or anything, I just, er...I didn't mean it to be a bad experience for you." He scratched his cheek awkwardly, glancing away.

"You didn't do anything wrong, so there's nothing to be sorry for. I just wish it could have been good for you."

[DragonSong]

"...It was." She sighed, letting her eyes close as she essentially allowed the blankets to swallow her up. "That was...sort of the problem."

She hadn't realized how it would affect her, feeling...well. Good. Happy.

Was that--could she feel that again? Without magic, could she just...be happy?

That was quite possibly the most terrifying thought she'd ever stumbled across in her life--the idea that she might actually be able to be simply happy, without fear of reprisal for the emotion. Without the fear that it might be suddenly stolen away from her. And Kai--

Kai. She was doing this for Kai. She had to be doing this for Kia, just for Kai. This couldn't be for her, too.

Right?

"If...if we actually do this," she murmured, peeking back up at Valor. "I mean, this whole marriage thing--slaves can't get married. Not officially. So I'm--" She swallowed, cleared her throat, and tried the words carefully, slowly, "I...wouldn't be...a slave, anymore?"

[Rhindeer]

It was good and that was the problem?

Valor watched her, chewing the inside of his cheek. She...wasn't used to happiness. Was that it?

Did she not feel deserving of it? Did it scare her?

He didn't want to press too hard, not while it was still raw. So he let her have her moment, let her calm down, while sitting in standby in case she needed something. He was a little nervous of making her cry again, but he could at least be there.

Her question caught his attention.

Aha. So it had finally registered.

"You wouldn't be a slave anymore," Valor confirmed, and flashed a small half smile.

"Once the chains come off, you're free," he said. "We'll go down to the registry and tear up your contract. That takes care of the legality. Which also means you could run if you wanted—I won't stop you."

He plucked at the edge of her blanket, an idle motion. "Of course, if you do that, neither of us gets what we want. I...kind of figured once you found your brother, that would be it. We find him, buy him, whatever it is we need to do. You get your freedom. I say it didn't work out, maybe you ran off with some wild Essyrni and broke my heart. Maybe I bring home a dashing merchant prince and get people buzzing again. It's a fair exchange for putting you through this farce, don't you think? I get what I want—drama—you get what you want, and Pari gets his money's worth while learning a valuable lesson about gifts."

[DragonSong]

Not a slave.

Free.

Under usual circumstances, she probably would have been able to keep a decent lock on her emotions about that. As it was, she was still feeling pretty raw, and his confirmation brought a new surge of tears rolling up from her chest to stick in her throat.

She tried to roll onto her back, winced as her wings bunched uncomfortably in the blankets, then gave up and rocked back to her side, blinking rapidly in an attempt to clear her vision. "Yeah. Right. Okay."

She took a careful breath--and then laughed, sharp and startled and bright. "Wow. Okay."

Yeah. Maybe she was a little hysterical. That seemed correct. But she really didn't care.

She sat up slowly, still keeping the blankets bunched around her shoulders. Her hair was a certifiable mess, her feathers nearly as rumpled, but she managed to smile at him, and it was again close to that piece of sincerity that she'd allowed him to see before. "For what it's worth, the merchant princes tend to be assholes--I think you can do better," she told him, her voice still a little shaky, but clearly trying to find that shield of playfulness that she'd had before.

[Rhindeer]

Oh gods she looked about to cry again! Valor had never made a girl cry so much, and it seemed whatever he said now just made her well up! Was she still reeling from the magic's effects? He bit his thumbnail, hating that helpless feeling that came with it. Usually when a friend or lover was in such a state, his go-to method was yanking them into his lap and into his arms, but he was certain that would absolutely freak her out.

He was awful with words. His words often made him sound like an asshole even when he wasn't trying to be—and, fair point, he often was a dick, too. He was aware his faults and owned them. He might not know the right words to make things better, so the best thing he found to do was to shut his mouth and just act.

Of course that only worked with people he already had that sort of relationship with. And sure, he'd casually touched Ka'lei before—a hand on her chin, or on her arm—but that still felt different in public than in private, even with the door open.

So for the moment, he took the safe route and said nothing, until she finally sat up (looking a right disaster) and smiled.

And even made a little joke.

Ah, that's the Ka'lei he knew!

He laughed, flashing her a wry look. "Oh, I'm an asshole too, we'd be a match made in hell," he said with a little flip of his shaggy red hair. "I'd leave him heartbroken and wanting and take half his fortune with me. That would probably cause some sort of international trouble. Hmm. But maybe you're right. Maybe I should set my sights higher like, say, the Shah?"

[DragonSong]

She snorted and rolled her eyes at him. "Well, no denting your confidence, is there?" She rolled her shoulders a bit, freeing her wings slightly from the bundle of blankets and letting the arch of them breathe. She shivered twice, making her feathers flutter and then lie a little more neatly in place.

"Also, I think she's too old for you," she added, twisting in place to try to look at the length of her wing. She frowned, picking at the frayed edges of one jet black feather.

She wouldn't say she was vain, but...she'd admit to liking her wings. And just now, the idea of getting them properly preened was far more appealing than facing any of the emotional repercussions of what had just happened. Not to mention Valor seemed happy enough not to dwell on it, which she appreciated. Still...

"Thanks," she mumbled in the general direction of her wing. "For, um...helping. Me."

She cleared her throat. That was the best she could do, for the moment. She would...think about all that later. Much later. As later as she could feasibly manage.

"Uhg, I'm going to molt soon," she realized, both relieved to have a change in subject but also a bit annoyed, crinkling her nose. On the one hand, a molt was a good thing--her clipped primaries would be replaced with full, healthy feathers. On the other hand, it meant she'd be shedding feathers for days, which she hated.

[Rhindeer]

Ka'lei freed her wings, and Valor couldn't help but study them as she fluffed and arranged them—so like a bird. They really were magnificent, and he really, really wanted to pet them.

Her quip about the Shah's age, however, made him grin. "Age is but a number, darling. Maybe she'd prefer a youthful young stallion that can run long into the night." He winked at her, keeping the mood light until Ka'lei was ready to talk. Which it seemed she was—a little.

Once again, she thanked him. Valor tilted his head, curious.

"Ah, we'll, I'm glad that was helping. I was afraid I'd broken you," he said with a sympathetic wince. "It seemed...intense." And he was dying to know what had happened. All the better to prevent a repeat performance!

He watched her pick at her feathers and groan about molting, and his eyebrows shot up. "Wait, molt? Really? And you said you weren't a bird!" he teased. "What happens then? Do you go all bald and patchy? Does it hurt?"

[DragonSong]

"I'm not a bird," she snipped back, resisting the petty urge to stick her tongue out at him. "But feathers are feathers." She let her head bob from side to side as he asked his questions.

It was odd, to get questions. Usually her wings were just something that made her exotic. Desirable. People didn't usually care about how they actually worked. "Well, the old feathers don't actually fall out until the new ones are ready," she answered first, "so it's not so much patchy as...mmm...well, they look a bit shorter in some places, for a bit. At least, that's how it's supposed to work." She shrugged. "When they wouldn't feed us well, sometimes we'd lose feathers early—that's how you get the patchy spots."

She considered a moment longer, as though that didn't reveal maybe more than she would have liked, then added thoughtfully, "I wouldn't say it hurts, but it's sort of...itchy. And then if you fuss with them too much you can make them sore." Another pause. Then:

"You didn't break me. It— I didn't ever...actually remember being happy like that. Just...without anything else. Just happy. But then, when you sang, I was, and I remembered, before they took us from our mother, and—"

Her throat tightened and she looked back to her wings. "So. Uhm, yeah, sometimes I get tired, too. When I molt. Kai always gets really grouchy, I dunno what it is..."

Okay. She could do this. Sneak the emotions in between the innocuous feather information. That worked. This was fine.

[Rhindeer]

Valor propped his chin up in his hands as he listened to Ka'lei's explanation, genuinely curious. After all, it wasn't everyday you met a winged person—and also, it just seemed like something he should be aware of, since she was currently under his care— 

...under his care.

The thought flicked into his brain in a flash, a fresh realization blooming. She was a slave. Even when she wasn't a slave anymore, she was still vulnerable, a stranger in a land she was unfamiliar with. It was the first moment he really thought of it that way, that he was directly responsible for another life. Well, a life that wasn't a cat or a lizard.

A human life.

Oh, Pari was definitely getting an earful later.

He winced at the part where she mentioned not getting fed well. And then the part about them being itchy and sore if they got messed with much—that sounded like a bad combination. It made his own shoulder-blades itch. He was still musing over that when she cut in with a subject change between the feather talk.

And then it was back to feathers again.

Hmm...

Peering at her curiously, he held up a hand and pointed at a wing, unable to resist. "May I?" he asked, and then, quietly, "What happened to your mother?"

[DragonSong]

Ka'lei seemed genuinely startled by the request, though perhaps she shouldn't have been. Lots of people were curious about her wings, she just wasn't used to...being asked if someone could touch them. And Valor was clearly the sort of person to whom physical contact came easily--when they were playacting for the staff in his dining room she had understood that, but now...

She considered for a long moment before taking a breath and nodding sharply, extending one wing away from her body a little bit so it was closer to him. Despite the clipped primaries and some ruffled edges, she really did try to take care of her feathers, when she could. Most of them were sleek and smooth, once she'd laid them properly flat. With her molt coming on, the softer down beneath her flight feathers was a little easier to see, bits of fluff occasionally peeking out.

"...I don't know," she answered his second question after another moment. Her eyes were fixed firmly on her extended wing, determinedly not looking at his face. "They took us from her, when they caught us. We were sold off a few days later. I never saw her again. I remember--" She cleared her throat, forced herself to say it like it was a story, like it had happened to someone else. "I remember she fought back. Screamed for us. I--I don't know if they..."

She swallowed, turning her head away. She didn't talk about her mother--not even to Kai, not really. She had no idea if the woman was still alive, if she was a slave, if she'd escaped...she didn't even know which she wanted to believe. Because of course she should want her to be alive and free, to be safe, but if she was...

Why had she never tried to come back for them?

[Rhindeer]

Yes!

Valor wasted no time in petting her wing, feeling like a child all excited about getting to hold freshly hatched chicks. Of course he had never actually participated in the labor around farming or raising animals or any such menial tasks, but he did remember that experience, and how soft and delicate they had been.

Her wings were surprisingly soft too, but in a different way, smooth and sleek. He caressed the feathers gently, wondering if that felt like much to her—he knew nothing about this sort of thing, like of course dogs enjoyed being pet but did birds? Er, not that she was a bird, just that fur was more like hair and he loved having his hair stoked; it felt blissful. How much sensation transferred through the feathers down to her?

He idly stroked her wing as she spoke, the initial wonder soon turning to a pang of sympathy. He should have expected that answer; she probably would have mentioned her along with her brother if she had any hope of finding her again.

"You're strong, and she's your mother," he said. "If you inherited that from her, then she's somewhere out there, right?"

[DragonSong]

Ooooooohhhhhhhkay.

Hm.

Okay.

It felt...different. He'd touched her wing breifly back at breakfast, and that had been a little startling, but mostly just because she wasn't used to people doing that. And he'd snatched his hand right back, so it wasn't like the touch had lingered. This was...

Different.

It wasn't bad. Definitely not bad. But other than Kai, no one just stroked her wings like that--the only times someone other than her brother had touched her feathers, it was either to clip them, pluck them, or try to oil them to "pretty her up" (that had only happened twice, thank gods, and she'd made her displeasure at the concept Distinctly Known). It sort of felt like...well. The closest comparison she could give was someone carding their fingers through her hair, the short, fine strands at the nape of her neck specifically--but that still wasn't quite right.

It was...sort of nice.

Really nice, actually.

She cleared her throat, glancing at him curiously, head tilted. "Maybe," she conceded to his assertion that her mother was alive. She shrugged, looking away again. "I guess it doesn't really matter, in the end." Finding her brother would be a feat in and of itself--she didn't even have a hope of finding their mother. Not after ten years.

Cocking her head the other way, she found herself starting to smile crookedly as he seemed so--so enamored with stroking her wing. "They're just feathers," she laughed lightly, unable to help it. "Are they really that fascinating?"

[Rhindeer]

Ka'lei seemed to want to let the topic go, and so Valor refrained from prodding again—you know, lest he make her cry again like some jerk who made girls cry. He had gotten something out of her, and though it wasn't much, it was also probably best to stop before her walls went up completely.

Her comment made him scoff, fingers still gliding over her wing, pausing here and there to examine an individual feather and the differences between each type. He had never really paid attention to their arrangement, or the different sizes, even different textures—like between the long ones at the tip and the tiny fluffy ones beneath. 

"Just feathers, she says," Valor said with a shake of his head. "Just feathers. Maybe so, but do you see feathers on me?"

Obviously not.

He looked from her wing to her face, grinning, liking the sound of her laugh no matter how small. That smile looked good on her.

"Of course I'm fascinated. I don't have them, and I tend to be fascinated by anything I don't have, just like I don't have—"

He cut off, pressing his lips together before he could make the inappropriate comment. "They're just nice," he finished lamely.

[DragonSong]

"Mmm." Ka'lei tipped her head again as she watched him examine them, finding herself oddly tickled by it.

Almost literally; a particular stroke of his fingers nearly made her jump as he brushed over a bit of downy fluff and the already loose feathers shivered against the skin of her wing.

Then he So Very Clearly stopped himself from saying something inappropriate, and she found herself laughing again, snorting when he changed the comment to her wings being "Nice".

"Listen, I appreciate you looking out for my--currently non-existent--modesty," she chuckled with a vague gesture at the skimpy, sheer cloth still draped over her body, "but you don't have to do that. I promise, I've probably seen or heard worse at some point."

She didn't even necessarily mean that in the worst way--of course she'd had lewd comments thrown at hear as weapons, a way of proving someone's power over her. But she also had a brother who was far too easy to scandalize, and a mischievous sense of humor. She wasn't above an inappropriate joke now and then; it was just a matter of how it was said.

Expression softening just a bit, she added in a slightly more sincere tone, "Thanks, though. I'm...glad you like them." Which was true, she realized with some mild surprise. She certainly liked her wings--it was oddly gratifying to know that someone else liked them too.

[Rhindeer]

Oh. She was probably going to regret that.

Valor raised his eyebrows at Ka'lei's assertion that he needn't censor himself. Really now! He was used to being the odd duck amongst a bunch of Serenian prudes. He didn't mind being the odd duck—he savored the attention and notoriety—but even he knew there was a time and place for treading carefully. The way he saw it, Ka'lei was one of those exceptions, because he really, really didn't want to scare her.

There was a difference between the relatively harmless offending of delicate and exaggerated sensibilities, and making someone feel unsafe. Someone getting their britches in a twist over his sloppy but consensual public makeouts was one thing—like, who cared? Who was that hurting? But making a slave fear violation was another. He remembered Ka'lei's fear when she was first shoved into his room, and he wanted to make sure she felt safe.

He had kind of figured making uncouth jokes while they were both in his bed might, you know, not be such a wise idea. But if she wanted him to speak plainly...

"Well, if you insist, but don't say I didn't try to be good. I was just going to say I like your wings for the same reasons I like breasts: I don't have them so they're extra fun to play with. You're thanking me for liking them but really, I'm doing this for me!"

He stuck his tongue out at her to show he was teasing, and resumed his petting—but with a little more purpose. He thought he'd felt her shiver earlier, and he was curious to see if he could get another one out of her. Was it a certain type of feather he'd touched? Or the way he moved his fingers? He explored her wing with the same idle amusement he felt when he scratched a dog and found a spot that got their leg kicking, and when he felt it again, he repeated it.

[DragonSong]

Ka'lei's smile softened a bit as she tracked his expression and thought she could guess at the dilemma he'd been facing. It made sense, really, even if the basic human decency behind it still kind of threw her. "Tell ya what," she said as he continued stroking her wing. "I'll definitely let you know if I'm ever...uncomfortable."

Which was...a miraculous thing to say, really. Why should she ever let someone know if their behavior caused her discomfort? For most of her life, that had been the point of a good deal of behaviors. To think that someone might listen, might adjust what they say or did to make sure she wasn't uncomfortable--well. It was still a little difficult to wrap her head around.

She laughed at his comment about breasts, nodding her head from side to side. "I suppose I can see that," she mused, still chuckling. "I did kinda always wonder why men tend to be so fascinated by them. They're just sort of...there." She glanced down at her own and shrugged.

His fingers stroked over another loose bit of down and she actually started a bit, sending some of the fluff cascading onto the bed as her wing shivered reflexively at the touch. "Oh." She blinked at the black fuzz, then found herself blushing and pulling her wing back, a little embarrassed. "Er, sorry, I'll--told you, I'm on the edge of a molt," she muttered, already moving to get off the bed so she didn't continue shedding fluff all over his imported silk sheets. It was a habitual move more than anything else--while he wings had made her an exotic wonder in Essyrn, they'd also meant that she was a particularly "messy" slave to keep at times, and plenty of masters had expressed just how unsavory that was.

[Rhindeer]

"Hmm...deal," Valor said with a sly grin. "Come to think of it, I should have never been in doubt. You've never previously had any difficulty expressing your...displeasure." He cocked his head, rubbing at his chin. "I seem to remember something about biting me?"

At least his comment had been taken well, and even with amusement! Though he couldn't help but follow her own gaze down to her chest before he quickly snapped his eyes back to her face. Time and place, time and place, but also he wasn't blind! And she was still wearing practically nothing. That was not his fault!

Though he couldn't help but startle a little when she pulled her wing back and practically scrambled from the bed, fluff falling, which he honestly barely noticed. He was more concerned with her reaction, at first thinking maybe he had gone too far—until she explained.

His eyes dropped to the bed and the little shower of feathers scattered there.

"Why are you apologizing?" he asked with a tilt of his head. He scooped the feathers in his hand and tossed them off the side of his bed—a problem for his servants to deal with later—and pat the mattress. "There. Easy fix. If anything, I suppose I could save the feathers and have another pillow made, but...that would be weird, wouldn't it? Hm, yeah, that might be kind of weird."

There was a knock on the doorframe, and he looked toward the open door where several servants now stood, hands full of brilliantly colored fabrics. "Delivery," one of them called, and Valor motioned toward his armoire. 

"Set them over there," he said, and as they bustled to do it, he flashed Ka'lei a grin. "Here's the fun part."

[DragonSong]

Easy...fix.

Ka'lei blinked, watching him toss the feathers carelessly onto the floor. Well. Huh. She wasn't sure what she'd expected--or if she'd really expected anything--but perhaps she shouldn't be surprised. From what she knew about him, that seemed like an incredibly Valor solution to the problem.

Cautiously, she extended her wings just a bit from her back and gave herself a little shake. A few more downy feathers fluttered to the floor, and she giggled. Actually giggled, unable to stop the sound.

And then there was a "delivery" at Valor's door, and she spun to face the servants, partially shrinking back into a more defensive position instinctively. The surprise faded quickly though, and she straightened up and peered at the host of colorful fabrics that were being placed on the armoire.

Oh dear.

She shot Valor a highly skeptical look. "Fun part?" She looked the fabrics over again. She had to admit...they certainly looked nice. High quality. Certainly finer than anything else she'd ever worn. But... She cocked her head at him, and asked with some genuine curiosity, "Clothes are clothes, aren't they? How is this fun?"

[Rhindeer]

"Yes! Fun," Valor repeated as the servants finished their delivery and scurried out the door. "Clothes are clothes, sure, but you could look at anything that way. Food is food...but some food is delicious and some is bland. It's all about the experience, my dear."

He rolled off the bed and crossed the room to where the clothes had neatly been arranged within the giant, ornate armoire--such a large piece of furniture that even Valor struggled to fill it. He pulled out one of the dresses and gave it a little twirl, showing it off first the front and then the back. That one in particular was an emerald gown made of slinky silk, with short sleeves.

"Ta-da! It's backless," he said with a smile. "They all are, just different styles and colors. Some lace up the sides, some tie at the back, and so on. Different colors, different sleeves, different materials. Our seamstress here, she's a wizard with fabric--literally, that's how she was able to alter these all so quickly. Go on, then, try them on. See which ones you like. Oh! You can change here."

From beside the armoire, he unfolded a wooden changing screen, ornately carved and painted with woodland scenes and inlaid with gold foil.

Settling back on the bed, he added, "If you need me to strap you in, I'm more than happy to assist!"

[DragonSong]

Ka'lei snorted and rolled her eyes at him, but she was smiling a bit. "The experience," she repeated, highly skeptical. She seriously doubted any of the clothes he was offering would impress her nearly as much as the spread at breakfast.

Then he twirled the gown for her, showing off the lack of back--and she once more found herself floundering a bit for a response. Backless. He'd had someone alter all these clothes just so she could wear them easily with her wings. And he said it like it was nothing, like it was no big deal at all that someone had used magic to change the dresses so that she could actually wear them.

She stared at him, lips slightly parted and eyes a little wide, as it dawned on her yet again that he said it like it was nothing because it was, to him. Not an issue to change some clothes for this feral slave girl who'd been dumped in his lap--oh, she has wings? Fine, fine, just change the styles. No problem at all to cater to what she needed.

She blinked rapidly, perhaps still feeling a little raw from her earlier emotional break, and cleared her throat as she stroked her fingers over a few of the dresses. "Okay...I guess I'll try a few," she muttered, trying--and she feared failing--to sound careless about it. She snorted a bit when he offered to help her "strap in". "I think I can manage," she told him wryly, and perhaps a bit overconfidently.

More carefully than she might have before, she gathered up the pile of fabric and ducked behind the changing screen. She plucked at the sheer wrappings that currently covered her, gave the screen a slightly nervous glance, then quickly shook herself and began the process of pulling on the first dress.

It was a deep, midnight blue affair, with a layer of pale gold in the underside of the skirt that peeked out in flashes when she moved. The bodice clung to her form, but also supported her posture, with a halter tie around the neck that she managed to fumble into something like a proper bow. She smoothed her hands down over the form of the thing, feeling pale gold embroidery picked out in rippling waves over the bodice that shimmered when she moved, like the glint of coins through deep water struck by sunlight. The skirt swished pleasantly when she turned in place, silk like liquid against her legs.

...Okay. Maybe Valor had a point about clothes.

"Well. Um...okay then." She took another breath and peeked around behind the curtain at Valor. "Don't. Laugh," she warned him as she crept out, arms wrapped loosely around her middle and her wings drawn in tight with a strange and sudden surge of nerves.