Sweet Talk. (DragonSong)

[homeboy!]

Staluk was quiet, Camellia had given up everything she had known for their people's sake, but admittedly, he never gave the notion much thought. He wasn't there, he hadn't seen what was at stake- maybe he should have been. Instead, he was halfway across the continent chasing revenge, and he regretted it more than ever in that very moment. If he had been there, maybe it would not have come to this.

"You will never lose me, Camellia." A simple response, but it came from the heart, but his hand moved up to take hers off his cheek.

"I will run with you, always, but I will not bow before demons who claim to know whats best for our people. Not when they flaunt the very forces that stole them from us." Staluk made a motion to step forward, hoping Camellia would move from his path.

[DragonSong]

Camellia didn't budge.

"You...impossible man!" Gritting her teeth, she stamped her back hooves in an unconscious gesture of agitation. "No one asked you to bow to her, just--don't provoke her! Damnit, Staluk!"

The Lead Mare had been a stalwart presence for their herd for years now. Always steady, always calm, ready to make the difficult choices without allowing emotion to override her sense of logic. In just a few moments, that thin veneer of control had washed away, revealing the snapping, fiery spirit that Camellia had been attempting to contain since the last raid on their people.

"Lakali just wants to help! She doesn't have to, she doesn't owe us anything, she isn't demanding anything of us! She offers advice, and I may or may not choose to follow it. The fact that I normally do has no bearing on her position as our patron!"

[homeboy!]

"Look at where her help has gotten us!" Staluk shouted, throwing an arm to his side in frustration. Staluk seldom raised his voice, but his temper had already burned short once that day, so there was not much left of his fuse. His face froze up for a moment, then fell, 'I didn't mean to yell.' Words he was too afraid to say. He breathed deeply, collecting his anger, then let out a frustrated sigh.

"You look at her as if she is one of us. Like she is something that we can become." Staluk turned away from her then, twilight breaking through the trees, throwing light across the scars and burns that ran up and down his back. "She is not."

His head turned, and his eyes gazed into Camellia's with a mixture of anger and dread. "We are dying, Camellia, and it is the worst death. Your patron does not understand that, if she does, she does not seem to care."

"How do you expect anyone to accept council from a creature that would see them snuffed out with such apathy?"

[DragonSong]

Camellia took a step back. Her eyes were wide, though the anger and fear had left them, replaced with something...very close to heartbreak.

She shook her head slowly. The fire visibly drained from her.

"...Is that really what you think of me?" Her voice was barely more than a whisper, tiny and hurt. She said nothing to his opinion of Lakali--she should have known better than to bring him to the Glade, known he wouldn't truly understand, though it was through no fault of his own--but still...

"Do you truly think I'm so weak?" She wouldn't meet his eyes, her own gaze cast down toward her hooves. "That I look to her as--as some sort of idol? Something to strive for? That I cannot accept her council without doing so utterly blindly?"

Another step back. Her arms came up to hug her waist gently. She shook her head again. "If that is truly how you feel, I'm only surprised you've followed me this long." Her voice trembled slightly, but that core of steel began to reinsert itself--though it was not the same flash of battle-spirit from before, this was... Tired. Wary. Drawing in on herself in an effort to fend off an unknown hurt.

[homeboy!]

"Camellia.." His eyes looked to her in guilt, then to the floor as he turned back around to face her. He did so without speaking, as he did not know what to say. The quiet remained for some time, the sound of the Glade being the only thing to fend off the silence between them. Staluk's mouth opened to speak many times, but no words ever came, until finally,

"You should not have brought me here. I am sorry I asked you to come."

His voice was quiet, more than that, it was weak, the booming pride that carried his words reduced to a whisper.

[DragonSong]

The sudden softness to his tone twisted at her heart. She ignored the feeling, pushing it away as she turned to face the path back out through the trees once more. She wouldn't look at him.

"I'm not." Her voice was calm and even, and utterly blank. It had been a long time since she had locked her mate from her heart, but it seemed that was what she was doing now, intentionally or not. "If this is what you feel, I am glad to learn it now, rather than later."

She had to hide a wince as the harshness of her own words hit her ears, but she didn't try to take them back. She was silent for a moment, then sighed quietly and allowed her shoulders to curve forward. Another breath, then she took the first few steps down the path that would lead them back to their Herd.

"...Come. They will begin to worry for us soon. We can discuss our next move in the morning."

[homeboy!]

'If this is what you feel, I am glad to learn it now, rather than later.' Staluk's head dipped at her harsh words, but they did not feel undeserved.

"Hm." Staluk gave an affirmative nod and followed behind her, but kept a distance between them. He was silent the entire journey back, so much so that, if one wasn't looking at his enormous frame, it was as if he didn't exist. He spoke no words, his breaths were slow, and the usual thud of his hooves was reduced the quiet rustling of the grass beneath them.

He greeted no one when the two returned to the Herd, only speaking to one of the other stallions before the two silently went out to patrol the perimeter, and they were not to return until the following morning.

[DragonSong]

Camellia moved quietly among the Moonflower Herd, speaking softly with her people as they all set about bedding down. Her eyes flickered to Staluk when he and another stallion—barely more than a colt, really, and the boy did idolize the Herd Stallion quite fiercely—began their patrol. She looked away again quickly.

Her chest ached.

She did not allow it to show on her face, finishing her rounds with her usual patient smile before finding a place to bed down herself.

It was strange to set up the traveling tent and curl onto her side beneath it without her mate’s warmth at her back. Even when he participated in the evening patrols, she always knew he’d be there when she woke in the morning.

She did not have that certainty now.



Dawn broke cool and clear; autumn was well on its way, it seemed. Camellia woke with a shiver, twisting her upper body automatically to look for Staluk, wondering why she was so cold—then she remembered.

...I have to speak with him.

Not just about this. In fact, whatever was happening between them—again, that ache in her chest, unyielding—may have to be shunted to the side temporarily in favor of dealing with the more pressing concern of the immediate future of the Herd. She had been thinking on Lakali’s words, and had arrived at a decision.

In most circumstances, she thought Staluk might have actually approved.

Another sigh, and she got to her feet. She needed to find her mate.

[homeboy!]

Staluk and the Stallion returned as the first rays of dawn broke past the horizon, if Staluk was tired, it did not show, but the same could not be said for his companion. The young centaur's name was Owis, and though he tried to mimic Staluk's composure by feigning an excited demeanor, he was clearly exhausted. "Good work." The only words he offered the lad before venturing deeper into the Herd.

From there, he attended to the rest of his responsibilities as the rest of the Herd began to leave their tents. Starting fire pits, performing headcounts, speaking with the other seasoned centaurs, these things were his duty as Herd Stallion, yes, but more importantly, the work kept his mind busy. He would not see himself dwelling on words he wished he had never said.

From afar, he saw his mate exit their tent, but was unsure if he should approach her, a tenseness finding him then. Instead, he opted to fiddle awkwardly with some nearby supplies, only halfway pretending to be taking some sort of inventory, hoping she wouldn't notice him.

[DragonSong]

Unluckily for her mate, before her elevation to Lead Mare Camellia had been one of the Herd's finest reconnaissance scouts--it didn't take her very long at all to take stock of the people around her and find that one discordant note among the relatively sleepy morning preparations.

She took a breath to steady herself. She was not Camellia and he was not Staluk; they were Lead Mare and Herd Stallion, and they had a job to do.

She passed Owis as she moved toward her mate, giving the young man a smile and a nod of gratitude, urging, "Get some rest. We have an hour or so before we'll be on the move again."

She wove her way through the herd until she was only a few lengths away from Staluk, watching him fiddle with what appeared to be a half empty sack. Almost despite herself, she felt a smile twitching at the corners of her mouth--damn him for being so endearing, even in this.

"Staluk." She kept her voice calm and even. To the rest of the Herd, absolutely nothing was amiss between their two leaders. "We must speak, and make our plans for the day's travel. Walk with me?"

[homeboy!]

"Of course." He said, in an unnaturally loud tone. Everything was fine, totally fine. Subtlety was not one of the Stallions specialties. He set the sack back down, giving a nod as if everything inside was accounted for and up to his standards. Following Camellia as she walked, he waited until they were out of earshot to speak again.

"What did you want to discuss?"

[DragonSong]

"We will return south."

She stared at him, calm and cool. This is the easy part. Just tell him the plan. This was what he'd been arguing for almost since he rejoined the Herd after that last raid, after all. Surely he wouldn't object.

"We will return to the plains, one last time. One last attempt. If we cannot find a way to make a home there...we will come north again. For good, this time." She lifted her chin up and stared at him, cold and resolute as stone. "Will you agree?"

[homeboy!]

"I- what?" Staluk took a half step back, confused and a fairly shocked by her almost callous delivery. He was unsure of what to make of her announcement, it was not often he found himself surprised, but he tried to compose himself. He would start with his answer, for that is something he was certain of.

"I will follow you wherever you lead, Camellia." He took a breath after saying so, looking down at the ground in perplexed thought. In their years together, the stallion always tried to see his mates reasoning behind her choices, for better or worse, but in this instance, he looked at her and could only see his own.

"May I ask.. what brought this about?" Staluk only half heard Lakali's advice, and even then he tossed it out as the backward-speak of those who are touched by magic. Regardless, if what Camellia said to him in the forest was even half-true, she would have her own reasoning for coming to this decision.

[DragonSong]

She was almost tempted to bite out, Will you? But she held her tongue. That was a childish response, lashing out after being hurt. She had decided to attempt reconciliation--and at least her mate seemed willing to go along with the attempt.

"Because..." She paused. Unthinking, she drew her bottom lip between her teeth as her brow furrowed. It was a habit from a much younger mare, and one she'd thought she'd lost when she took up her mother's mantle as leader of their Herd.

When she realized what she was doing she stopped quickly and flushed, glancing away. She didn't want him to think her uncertain. "Because...you were right. Perhaps not in everything, but it... I have been running away, as much as I have been running forward." She sighed and closed her eyes, resisted the urge to rub at her temples. "I still believe our best choice--our only choice--is to build a new life, far from the old one. But...I know that a part of me has resisted returning to the plains because...because I am afraid."

Her voice lowered with the admission, until she was almost whispering. The warrior in her, long dormant but by no means forgotten, balled her hands into fists by her sides. "I do not want to go back there. I do not want to be reminded of our loss. I do not want to see the fields we hunted and the streams we followed and remember my parents, and my sister, and--"

Her voice broke. She paused, taking a few breaths to collect herself.

When she opened her eyes again, that mismatched gaze was once more calm and clear. Any hint of the turmoil inside her had been firmly locked away again. "But perhaps sometimes the way forward is the way back. We shall see."

She started to step around him, move back toward the camp, then paused. Voice low, she murmured, "I'm not doing this for her. I'm not even entirely sure that I'm doing it for you. But you were right. It was more than hope for the future that kept me from our old home. I will not let fear of the past stifle us."

[homeboy!]

Staluk's stern expression faltered at her words, he wanted so dearly to reach out to her then, to offer any sort of solace in her choice, but all he could manage was nods and small noises of affirmation.

Upon hearing her admission, that she was afraid, his face became more confused than anything. Staluk had known Camellia to be many things, calculating, careful, perhaps- but fear was not something he had seen her wear often. Even still, he was quiet then, but his eyes moved between the grass and her own, searching for something to say.

Eventually her voice broke, and again he would say nothing, afraid to speak. After a pause, she would hide those feelings away. 'Fair enough.' He supposed.

He understood her fears, and did his best to make this empathy known, she had begun to step around him, speaking once more. "I will not let fear of the past stifle us." Staluk reached out hesitantly, to take hold of her hand.

"I know that you won't Camellia, but allow me to chase this fear with you." The words came out awkwardly, but he held eye contact with her despite this. He wished to say other things, too, 'Sorry' being at the top of that list, but this is all he could manage.

[DragonSong]

She offered him a small smile. At least he was trying, she supposed. "...Always, my heart."

A part of her wanted to reach out to touch him, but she held back. She honestly wasn't sure if she was ready for that, or if she'd really properly forgiven him. Just because she could understand what he'd said and done didn't make the hurt sting any less.

"Come, we must inform the others of the change in plan." It was so easy to slide back into the role of Lead Mare. Safe.

[homeboy!]

"Hm." Staluk responded in the affirmative, releasing his grasp on her hand before following Camellia back into camp.

Upon their arrival, Staluk went to work rounding up the Herd into one of the larger clearings of the camp. After gathering up the stragglers, he entered their tent, albeit a bit hesitantly.

"Everyone is gathered outside, Camellia." He stood at the opening, a hand rubbing at the back of his neck.

"How do you plan to go about this?"

[DragonSong]

How did she plan to go about this?

The same way she usually did, she supposed: meticulous planning, and then winging it when things inevitably went sideways.

But she smiled as though she wasn't worried about anything at all and gave her mate a nod as she stepped around him toward the entrance of the tent. "I'll tell them the truth." Or at least, a portion of it.



The news that they would be heading back south was received surprisingly well, if with a mixture of confusion and something like wariness. But her people trusted her; she just had to hope she could live up to their faith in her.

Quite without her permission, she found her eyes sliding sideways toward Staluk as she moved through camp, helping the herd begin to pack up and prepare for the journey. Well. Most of their faith, I guess.

That still hurt. More than she was willing to admit. But he had accepted her decision easily enough, and he supported her in front of their people. For now, at least, that was enough.

[homeboy!]

Staluk was unsurprised by the Herd's reception to the news, for no other reason than his expectation of their people to follow Camellia, regardless of their personal beliefs. As he made preparations for the move south, he stole glances of his mate when he could. Eventually, he feared she had caught on, as he felt her gaze fall on him as he was preparing the other centaurs that were of fighting age of the journey to come.

With his responsibilities taken care of, he returned to their tent, packing up his few belongings, his axe being the only possession he had that he handled with any care. He turned it over in his hands, almost tenderly so, staring at his reflection in the metal, lost in rumination.

[DragonSong]

"...It hasn't gotten up and walked away from you then?"

Camellia's voice came from the entrance to their tent, where she'd been standing watching for just a few moments. She offered a small, slightly lopsided smile and took a few steps into the tent itself, allowing the flap of fabric to swing closed behind her.

She nodded to the ax he held to emphasize her point. "What are you thinking of?"