Mercy would be a kindness

[Marjorie]

"I hope you are well today," Arnel said, closing his little book and glancing up at the sound of Mercy's approach. He smiled at her gently, and scooted over on the bench he was seated on to give her ample room, beside what he had started to think of as 'their' fountain. Where they often spent much time reading holy texts and contemplating their religion in depth.

[Incandesa]

"Yes, indeed," Lillith said shyly. A genuine blush crossed her face and she sat next to him. In the time she had spent with Arnel discussing his god, she had seen another side of him, one she had never known in all the centuries they had fought together. Yes, she'd seen he was brave and courageous, kind and studious; even lustful and occasionally dishonest, though he denied it intensely. But she had never seen that kindness directed towards her. It was always for other women, human women. A touch of guilt panged her heart. Yes, he was only being kind to her because he thought she was an innocent human.

"You have fought many demons in the past, correct Sir Arnel? You must know them very well," she said. "Do you believe it is possible for Ekjin to accept a demon as one of his people?" The demoness ignored the thread of hopefulness that strayed into her voice. There it was, the question that had plagued her for months. Out of anyone, Arnel would tell her the truth, whether her desire was false or true, and she would accept it whatever it was. If there was no hope, she would end the charade, and stop with her fantasies.

[Marjorie]

That blush that blossomed across her cheeks was so innocent. It made her look radiant. More beautiful than he aught to think she was. His smile grew in it's warmth as she sat beside him.

Arnel nodded. "I have fought some," he said, "and one many times. I find them to be crafty, and cunning... though  also truly depraved." He paused without elaborating further though, sense that question was not, it seemed, the one she was really asking.

" Ekjin accepts all sinners who repent - and we are all of us, sinners," Arnel said, and he did truly believe it. He had to, otherwise he was doomed. He had failed so many times to live up to the standards to which he held himself... still he felt Ekjin's love, acceptance, strength. "He doesn't care abut one's color, gender, cast, creed, or species... Ekjin accepts and loves all those who wish to do right.

"So, yes, I do believe Ekjin would take a demon into his fold, if they truly wished to change their ways. You haven't found a demon who's soul you are trying to save, have you?"

[Incandesa]

Lillith bit her lip and had difficulty meeting Arnel's gaze. Somehow, when she was with him here, it was difficult to lie to him more than she had to. "Well, I'm not sure where I would become acquainted with such a person. But I'm simply taking Ekjin's base principle to its logical conclusion, theoretically speaking. Does "all sinners" truly mean ALL of them? One would naturally assume that demons have no desire to repent as humans do, enjoy the very nature of sinning, and would therefore be excluded from the category." Why was she speaking so quickly now? Nervously, she began to fiddle with her hair.

"I mean, have you ever seen a demon wish to repent in all your years, Sir Arnel? Or have you desired for a demon to repent of her ways? What does it truly mean to "love all of creation?" In her zeal, Lillith reached for the book of Ekjin to find the verse she had quoted, forgetting the consequences of such a careless act. She hands touched the book and pain ran through her, but not as it had before. It was a tolerable dull throbbing pain, not the sharp rebuke it had been before. The demoness stared a moment at the book in shock before it slipped out of her hands and fell.

[Marjorie]

"Perhaps," Arnel said, and then was quite a moment, thinking out his words before he said them, "Most sins are enjoyable... that's why they are tempting, even to good men. I have known good men to sin and I have see the truly wicked repent. I cannot say I know the minds of demons," God save him he might be able to say he knew the body of one, in his mind at lease anyway, "but if they should want to repent... to change their ways, truly and honestly...

"Why should acceptation be made for anyone? I don't think I would believe Ekjin to be the God I have know and loved and trusted and believed in all my life, if he did not extend his promise to any being who truly wished to repent."

Arnel reached down and picked up the book. Re-finding the page and passage she was looking for. "To love all creation, it is a powerful promise. Of course it comes with conditions. One has to want to be good, to believe in protecting others, to wish to rise above their sins -- and they have to put effort into doing so. But if you do, Ekjin promises to forgive you your past transgressions, to remake you, clean, and worthy, and to love and protect you. It is the reason I fight for him, and for those who cannot protect themselves."

[Incandesa]

"So what of you, Sir Arnel?" Lillith stared at him questioningly. She wondered if he would say the same if his precious god had asked him to protect her? There was so much bad blood between them. Surely he would kill her if he knew the truth. Forgiveness was an easy thing to promise when you didn't have anyone to forgive. But what about when the person you were asked to forgive had scarred your soul? Could you forgive a demon who had, say, cursed your wife? Perhaps tormented you?

Her throat was dry now. Why did she care so deeply about his answer? And why did it scare her so much to hear it? Because whatever he said, she knew his reaction if he knew the truth. If he said he could forgive, he would be lying. If he said he couldn't, it would hurt even more. "May-maybe we should end things here for today," she said quickly before having to face the dreaded answer. She turned and started to walk to her little corner.

[Marjorie]

What of him, personally. Arnel looked at Mercy for a long time after she asked that question. It hit a little too close to home. How could she know? She couldn't, of course, they had been speaking in hypotheticals this whole time. "It would not be easy for me," he said softly, at length. He shook his head in the negative when she said they should leave it there. "No," he said, his tone still gentle, and reached out to catch her lightly by the elbow, though his grip was not strong enough to keep her if she wished to leave, "we should not avoid questions because the answers are hard.  No devotion is real if it is never challenged.

"I would try to forgive. I make no claims of perfection. I would try to grant mercy, to offer forgiveness, to help them to repent."

[Incandesa]

Tears prickled at Lillith's eyes, but the exact reason why eluded her. She did stay though, just to be near him. How foolish of her. "I'm not sure I could have compassion you have, Sir Arnel. I doubt I whether I would do the same. There are simply far too many atrocities I have seen for me to fully love "all of creation." Too many that ended in everlasting anguish." In her mind, she thought back to the various things that demons did or encouraged others to do. Rape. Murder. Adultery. Extortion. Lying. Torture. They were things she had not only witnessed, but also actively participated in. It wasn't as if they were things she was disgusted by or were forced to do either. This was the nature of demons.

"Perhaps, I am not worthy to follow in Ekjin's footsteps." She stared at her reflection in the fountain, and the nun's habit. What a horrible lie it all was. And then, she really did start to cry.

[Marjorie]

Arnel moved closer to Mercy, put his hand lightly on her shoulder in an attempt to comfort her. "No one is perfect," he said softly, "that we strive and work and push ourselves to be better versions of ourselves tomorrow than we were today is all anyone can do. If you did not feel this heavy weight, then you would not care... and only then would you be unworthy."

[Incandesa]

The guilt was too much for her to bare and she ran off to her little corner to once again cry at the forgotten alter of Ekjin. Afterwards, she was called in to have a fateful meeting with Molk. Arnel would not see "Sister Mercy" after that. If he attempted to contact her convent, they would simply tell him, there was no Sister Mercy by that description. She had appeared from nowhere and vanished to nowhere.

[Marjorie]

Had he said something wrong? Arnel had only tried to give her the honest truth of things. Isn't that what she had asked for? He let her go, unsure why she was so upset, but respecting her desire to be alone.

It was a few days before Arnel was bothered by the fact that Sister Mercy wasn't around. He had thought they were friends enough that she would have left word if her duties had taken her elsewhere. He was a little disappointed to find that was, apparently, not the case. Eventually he did reach out to her convent, as no one here seemed to know where Sister Mercy had left to or why. When he discovered that she had apparently appeared and then disappeared out of nowhere, he became quite worried and spent a few days searching for her. Unfortunately he found not a trace of the woman anywhere.