Held between Heaven and Hell

[Haze]

She had been so close. So close, and yet so far. And now here she stood in the atrium of the temple, bared to the waist before a crowd of faces, many of whom she recognised as men who had come to her bed in the hopes of reaching out to the goddess Alrosi. A goddess she refused to believe existed. The failure to break away from the grasp of the temple had solidified her belief that she was alone in the world. Her hair was tumbled down in a tangled mess of knots around her shoulders, dark shadows smudged beneath her eyes, and there were series of fingertip bruises around her arms where she'd been hauled around by the temple's muscle.

The harsh voice of the Priestess rose above the catcalls from the crowd. "You are witnessing the punishment of the goddess. Those whom she has called into service pledge themselves to bring her praises, and the woman who stands before you is in breach of her oaths. Alrosi is a just goddess, who does not allow disobedience go unpunished. Naamiah has therefore earned herself five lashes." The older woman, dressed in all her red and gold finery beckoned towards a man holding a whip with a bony, bejeweled finger. The man stepped forward and roughly repositioned the girl.

Naamiah closed her eyes and set her teeth. The crowd went silent, to the point where the sound of the leather whistling through the air was as loud as the cracking of thunder. There was no way of anticipating the bite into flesh. She cried out once, tears stinging her eyes and then flowing freely down her cheeks as she determined to not let them have the satisfaction of hearing her pain. She bit down on her lip, and stared belligerently ahead.

Her legs were shaking with the effort of holding herself up, she was pale and a slick sheen of sweat had broken out on her forehead, but by some miracle she seemed able to block out the sensation of the other four strikes across her shoulders. There was a ringing in her ears, as the head priestess spoke again.

"And yet, to show you just how merciful the great goddess is, we accept our dear Naamiah back, with open arms." The priestess turned to her attendant, a short little turtle of a man, who handed her a new silken robe, of the same apple green of her torn gown. Priestess wrapped it over the girl's shoulders, and it was all Naamiah could do to stop from flinching at the feel of it over the rawness of her back. Gingerly, Naamiah pulled the edges around her exposed chest, the belled sleeves hanging unused.

"Let it be known," Priestess continued, "that the man who takes Naamiah in her state of repentance will be granted the same blessing, and a double portion of blessing." Naamiah's head shot up with horror. Surely not. She could hardly believe what she was hearing. The sound of men beginning to call out their bidding price, shouting out over top of each other caused her head spin, and there was a rush of angry, helpless tears in her eyes.  Fate had never been kind to her. She didn't know why it might start now.

[Lion]

It was an unusually full house today.  He didn't expect to see this kind of attendance for anything else.  But he supposed it was just as well that they were here now to witness the reprimanding of one of the Alrosi's own.  It was a rare sight to be sure, but the men that attended here regularly could expect to reap much reward from the suffering of others.  The man that observed from the side of the crowd, long dirty blonde hair, braided out of his face, and with an aquiline nose to offset deep set, gray eyes, was much better looking than most of the bunch that came in.

But there was not a touch of poverty here, except for perhaps the beggars that lingered without the walls of worship, panhandling for coin enough to be worthy of temple worship.  Really, he couldn't blame them.  The attendants here were beautiful, choice cuts of the finest flesh.  Even the older Priestesses had an air of regality to them that could not go unnoticed.  It was clear their goddess took care of her own.  The man's gray eyes surveyed the temple pillars, large, ornate, decorated with carvings of various miracles, saints and Priestess past.

He found a curious irony in the fact that the men here were so eager to find an attendant ripe for the picking, yet the men who truly belonged to the temple were lowered to the ranks of servants.  Well, he couldn't disagree with them.  This place was ripe.  Ripe for consumption.  Ripe for change.

He watched as the whip was raised high enough to increase the velocity of each lash.  And stood still as the crowd visibly winced as they whipped the young priestess.  They expected a cry, but none came.  The man raised a brow, curious, thinking.  The last one came and still no cry, but even he could see at his distance that she was barely keeping it together.  The Priestess announced for the bidding to begin and saw as hands and shouts shot up into the air.  The bids were taken, one by one, driving up the price quite high.

He said nothing until the bid had reached a thousand gold.  Quite a price for the sorry lot in the loose and quivering robes.  He looked her over again. Yes, she might do.  She might do quite nicely.

"Ten thousand," he said finally, voice deep, but inconspicuous. And the heads in the crowd turned to shoot daggers at him.  The price was at six thousand by then and silence quickly followed.  Even the Priestess looked naturally surprised by the extraordinarily high bid.  But afterward, she just smiled and nodded. Looking like a viper in red and gold.  "Ten thousand...  I believe we have a winner.  Come and claim your prize.  Lead this one to Naamiah's chambers, will you, Plesius," she said, to her manservant.

He approached from the side, walking up to the altar in slow, calculated steps.  He was heavily dressed for a forest temple, covered in a leather coat that dropped to his calves with a fur collar and lining and simple, but elegant robes underneath.  As he approached Naamiah's side, he handed two sackfulls of gold to the Priestess.  He held out a hand to the attendant in her robe.  "I am Lothaire," he said.

[Haze]

The buzzing of men raucous to claim her was making her sick to her stomach. The fresh cuts on her back were seeping, sticking the robe to them and they were now beginning to sting with a vigorous frenzy. Her head had been lifted, defiantly staring over the top of the crowd, meeting the cold marble of the walls ahead. She knew the reason why the Priestess had encouraged the bidding to rise as high as it did. Even before her attempted escape, Naamiah had been one of the most sought after attendants in the temple; this was simply the opportunity Priestess needed to fill her already over flowing coffers. Worship to Alrosi had nothing to do with it. It was greed, pure and simple.

As the calm, confident voice reached her ears, with its exorbitant figure, her eyes snapped to the man who had called, and after one short second, went back to staring ahead. Even as she heard his steady footfalls on the solid ground, she did not move. It took all her strength to keep herself collected, and not faint where she stood from shock, pain and utter despair. Would she never be free?

To the hand that extended to her, she simply clasped her hands together, right hand over left, with her small fingers woven together, as was custom and placed them in his hand, ready to be taken. She spoke to the servant, softly, informing him that his presence was not required. He looked hesitant for a moment, before Naamiah added "I do not think I am in any condition to run, Plesius, do you?" He shook his head gently, looking a little sorry for the girl, and then stepped away from the pair, and to the head priestess' side.

She stepped down from the raised altar, and to Lothaire's side. "May you find all you seek in Alrosi," she intoned in a empty, quavering voice. She stumbled in a step, the robe slipping from one shoulder, and she ducked her head, feeling all the eyes of the men that remained in the halls on her. Her cheeks flushed pink for a moment, before she went pale again, leading the regal looking man down towards her room. Her steps were slow and heavy, her breathing quick and shallow, but as she neared the doorway, she took her hands away, pushed open the door and motioned ahead.

"Make yourself comfortable," she said in a voice that was barely audible, the toll of the day, and days previous clearly showing. "Your worship to Alrosi will not go unheard. You may use my b-body-" her breath hitched here, and she closed her eyes against a wave of great dizziness, frantically trying to control herself for the sake of the appearance she must keep up, and the speech she must make. "You may use my body as you will."

[Lion]

Lothaire's eyes shimmered like the surface of water, so gently it was nigh imperceptible as he blinked.  The gray eyes there furrowed in a thoughtful expression as the Priestess wished him blessings from her goddess.  He gave a small noise of understanding, nodding and following Naamiah to her quarters.  Her comment made him roll his eyes internally, of course, but he made no opinion of it.  Lothaire only smiled kindly and said nothing along the way.

He waltzed in, taking in his surroundings as he was allowed into the room.  It was well put together, everything in its place and a place for everything.  Orderly, finely made...  He could enjoy causing a little chaos in here.  He wiped away his grin and walked further in, holding his hands behind his back.  Whirling around, he shot his gray eyes to her, inspecting her over and finally stepping in.  His hands were folded behind his back still.

"I'm quite comfortable," he said lazily, tilting his head.  He didn't smile, but his features were curious.  "You don't sound very...enthusiastic," he noted, reaching out a hand finger to feel drag along her neck before raising it to her chin.  "Going through the motions are you?"

[Haze]

Naamiah closed the door behind them, and stood in place, waiting for the purchaser to take his claim. To his observations, she felt a tremor. If Priestess heard that this was his perception of her, that she was simply, 'going through the motions', after all the trouble she had already caused, punishment would be more than a few lashings. Naamiah didn't move as the finger traced along her skin, until it rested at her chin.

She looked up then, with pale green eyes that belied the truth. She detested being here. She hated what she stood for, for what she was used for, and for what being her had reduced her to. Little more than an over priced whore. She knew that now, from her few short days out of the temple. Still, she had a duty to uphold, wounded both physically and emotionally as she might be.

She had never been the kind to make moves on men - she had always been the meek one, doing their bidding, but right now it seemed to her in this desperate moment, that her life depended on making this man believe that she was ready and willing to do as was required of her. She brought her hands up, loosing the robe from her shoulders and letting it puddle on the ground. She winced as the cuts on her back tore with the fabric's movement, but said nothing more, and lifted her hands to Lothaire's shoulders. Her touch was light, and bared as she was, it was more submissive than dominant.

"It is your worship, and not mine," she fought to keep her voice steady, while all she wanted to do was scream at the futility of her situation. "You are the one who chooses how best you would like to communicate with Alrosi."

[Lion]

She was eager to please, he saw, but could quickly tell it was out of fear of retaliation than any true will of her own.  Pity.  She was not bad to look at either.  Lothaire kept inspecting like she was some bizarre alchemical experiment, but a grin formed on his face nonetheless.  She was going through the motions, he could tell and that only made his smile widen.  He doubted she ever had a lover where any real passion was involved.  It took everything in him not to laugh at her.

He smiled fully at her, one of clear humored amusement and felt her face with his hand.  "I'd like very much to communicate with Alrosi.  But I'm not sure the blessed goddess is ready to communicate with me.  She seems a little wound up.  Wounded.  In need of some tender care.  Does she?" he asked, his smile turning wry and both his hands came up to hold her face.

[Haze]

That smile on his face was infuriating, but Naamiah could hardly summon up enough energy to look more than just dazed as his hand brushed over her face. Why? Why did men have to be so cruel? All that she wanted to do now was cry, and sleep away the shame, but here he was, holding her face in his hands, and asking her questions that she could not truthfully answer.

Everything within the temple was a sham, one great big lie, and even behind closed doors she did not feel confident enough to tell this man the truth. How could she, when she knew the news would reach back to the Priestess? And this was how she lived; the constancy of the fear was exhausting.

Still, maybe, just maybe, if she admitted to him that she needed care - but no. That was putting her own needs above his as a worshipper. It wasn't allowed, plain and simple. If his hands had not been holding her face still, she would have lowered her head. As it was, her eyes fell somewhere in the middle of his chest, having never once looked him full in the face.

"She... she does," Naamiah finally whispered, against her better judgment, and immediately her eyes lifted to beseech Lothaire. "Please, please do not tell Priestess. I swear to you that you will have what you have paid for. I just ... I .. cannot. My back..." A single, helpless tear slipped from the corner of her eye, warm on her cool skin. "Forgive me, please."

[Lion]

Lothaire softened his expression.  He nodded in understanding.  How an old crone like the Priestess that auctioned her off truly expect her to be able work after being thrashed across the back like she was.  Lothaire blinked at her and only bowed his head after she spoke.  He took his hands away from her face and took her hand in his and led her to the bed.

"Lay.  Front first, if you will," he said.  "A little blood never hurt anyone."  The sat down beside her and removed his heavy leather coat.  "Relax.  This won't hurt for long."

[Haze]

She began to shake in earnest the moment he let go of her face. She was glad for his hand, for while she didn't know him from the next man that might come to her, if the connection hadn't have been there, she knew she would have collapsed into a sobbing mess. The reminder that there was another with her was enough for her to hold herself together just a little longer, and she went willingly to lie face down on the bed, burying her head into the pillows.

How she could relax was beyond her, and she stayed tensed, muscles beneath her shoulders bunched up in tight knots. She heard the tell tale movements of the coat being removed, and she swallowed back against the tightness in her throat. Maybe he... maybe. Her fingers grabbed up handfuls of blanket, as she instructed Lothaire to a pitcher of water, and drawer with clean cloths, usually reserved for washing.

As she waited for his ministrations to begin, she chanced another word spoken from her own mind, and not the repertoire of phrases she was expected to use. "You are kinder than most, sir. I swear," her promises again, "you will have what you have paid for, and if you wish it, for your kindness, you may come again in secret."

[Lion]

Lothaire positioned himself beside her to clean her wounds and chuckled lightly as he did so.  There was an easier way to do it of course.  And of course, another attendant might find herself suddenly with a pair of lacerations all across her back.  It was all in a fair trade of course.  He padded her wounds with the damp cloth in hand lightly and worked the blood away.

"Kind," he grunted.  "That's a word that never factor's into most's vocabulary."  He sighed.  "But you...well, I don't expect to be rewarded any time soon.  I work very hard for my prizes and I cherish what I earn.  But you....you seem eager, but I know you don't mean it.  There's not ...something wrong is there?"

[Haze]

How easily he saw through her. And he didn't seem to hold judgement in his tone, either. She winced into the sheets, fingers clenching around the blankets as he wiped away at the tenderest of places. Naamiah sighed to his astute observations and his questioning. How easy it would be just to tell him.

And how easy it would be for him in turn to tell Priestess. No. She couldn't risk that now. Or could she? Surely death at the hand of the Priestess would be better fate than what she knew she had to continue to endure.

With a lack luster voice she turned her head a little towards him, eyes fixed towards the floor. "Tell me, Lothaire," she used his name for the first time,  "if you had just been flogged before a crowd of men, and then sold to the highest bidder, knowing that your duty is to be a vessel for the worship of Alrosi, and not feeling particularly up to the task, would you think there was something wrong?"

[Lion]

She had a wonderful sense of humor, he thought, even though he was sure she didn't mean to have one.  If only she knew just what he could see, but he remembered this was another day on the job.  There was nothing more than discretion and if now was the time to exercise it, he would do that.

Lothaire tended to her back wounds and paused at her question.  "If you mean have ever been made a tool for another's use, broken and humiliated in the process?  Of course," he said good-naturedly.  "Like you wouldn't believe, my darling.  But there's a difference between you and me.  In the end, everyone has their turn.  Everyone.  And yet...perhaps we aren't so different, you and I.  What good does wallowing in your misery do you in the end?"

[Haze]

He surprised her with his answer, and she couldn't fault him in his logic. Perhaps it was true that somewhere, somehow, every single person on this godforsaken land had their comeuppance. How she had earned this hand, she'd never understand, despite the years of trying.

"No good," she answered honestly, lifting her head now, and looking at him with a frown. It wasn't safe for her to talk like this, and yet she didn't seem to be able to stop the flow of words.  "But the only thing for me to do, is bear the burden. You heard with your own ears, that I have once tried to get away from here, but what am I? Nothing but a temple attendant, who is more the public's plaything than my own person."

Her head dropped back down, and she sighed heavily. "I shouldn't be saying these things to you. The last person I spoke to like this, he was kind enough, but words spoken out of turn and out of line with the teachings of the temple only bring on more punishment."

[Lion]

"Why would you say that?  What is it exactly that makes this place so intimidating to you that you cannot forge a person of your own?  I'm afraid I'm not as familiar with the teachings of this Temple as you might be.  Maybe you wouldn't mind enlightening me a little as to the ins and outs a little more.  I am a newcomer after all."

He stopped tending her to her back then and instead reclined beside her, propping his head up on an elbow and looking more patient than ever.

[Haze]

It was what she had been fearing. As he finished tending to her wounds, and laid beside her, his words rang in her ears. How could she explain to him all that had happened since she was a small girl? The abuse, the conditioning, the rituals and mantras, the constant, constant fear. How could she put into words the teachings of the temple, which she so abhorred?

She was so aware of her half-clothed state, and that only served to make her even more cautious. He had bought her at a high price, and she was sure that despite his attesting to the contrary, he knew perfectly well what went on inside the hallowed halls. With a sigh, she humored him though.

"As a temple attendant, I am one of the many women here that serve as vessels to communicate to Alrosi. Alrosian's believe that by ... through... "even now she struggled to get the words out, "that by acts of intercourse, men can achieve higher powers and commune with the goddess herself. I was sold here as a child to pay my father's debts, and somehow, those debts have never gone unpaid, no matter how many men have bought my services for the night.

"The Priestess is the head of the order, and she is the one who determines the fates of the girls here. We are taught that if we are beaten it is our fault for not pleasing the men in our company, and are thus punished for that. If we are not presented to the highest of standards, we are not doing honourable service to Alrosi, as we are to be human manifestations of her beauty and grace, and are thus punished for that.

"Of course there are some attendants here who have chosen this life for themselves, but can you not see how one who has not had a chance otherwise might find it intimidating?" She bit down on her lip, and turned her head into the mattress. "I could be killed for telling you this," came a muffled groan, and a sniffle. "Maybe I should have told someone all this sooner."

[Lion]

Here story might have pulled on his heart strings if he dared let them to.  It wasn't common for him to shed a tear.  But did that mean he didn't understand.  One must give a devil his due, but inside he was starting to blossom, to uncoil into a knowledge that, as he suspected, all was not well on the surface.  Every pond had its ripples, some larger than others, for every ripple could become a typhoon.

Lothaire paused and again softened his features.  His eyes took a speculative turn as they shifted toward the raw lacerations tracing the young woman's back.  This was the fate that was chosen for her.  But he was finding it had not been her choice.  His felt a red rush of anger because of it and laid in closer beside her.

"And what of the women?  What happens to them when they no longer exemplify her as a manifestation?  Are they killed?  Tossed out?  Why should men be the only ones to achieve a nirvana with the goddess' company?  You don't sound like you hold Alrosi in such high regard yourself," he said softly, no tone of judgment in his voice.  "But why would you?  Subjected to slavery such as this.  Perhaps...I understand more than you know. "

[Haze]

Naamiah wanted to just close her eyes, and weep away the uselessness of this conversation. What was the point in discussing the ins and outs of the temple if ultimately, nothing would change? She sniffed again, and pulled her head up to lay on her arms.

"Tossed out, usually. Very few work their way up the ranks to serve as priestesses - they get to choose what work they will and will not take, and then there's the high Priestess. Our current one - I do not even know her name - she has been here since I was a child. It is said that she was favoured by Alrosi because of the amount of coin she brought into the temple."

She shifted uncomfortably, all too aware of the hot tightness that was her back. To the question of why only men, she twisted her mouth a little. In all honesty, she didn't know. It was just the way it had always been, and she said as such, followed by a scoff. "Hold her in high regard? I do not even believe she exists." It was blasphemous talk, and now she didn't care. "As far as I am concerned, there is no goddess, no god. How could there be, and one that approves of, encourages places like this!" Her voice rose in frustration.

Taking a moment to compose herself, she took in a shaky breath. "I know this was not what you were expecting from a temple attendant. But ... what do you mean? How could you understand what happens here?"

[Lion]

Her sniffles brought a frown to his face.  He really wasn't seeing any use in them and what was more, he really doubted she knew how lucky she really was in being in such a vulnerable state and open for the chance to be a puppet on strings.  And truly, then she'd be no different from the rest of the pawns in the plans of the High Priestess.

But he was quickly finding, he might not be capable of doing this alone...  If he was going to catapult this endeavor, he was going to have to take advantage of every outlet possible.  Lothaire looked at her with gleaming eyes.  They glowed with an otherworldly light, like a lone candle trying to light the darkness of a cave.  They flickered with the gust of faint wind.  

If there was an outlet in the woman, he'd find it and winnow it out.  "Because I understand the web of lies you've been cast in.  I understand what it is to be hopelessly deceived.  And I know that the power behind this temple will break and shatter like dreams made of glass, after I'm through.  After all, even you seem keen enough to know that not everything is as it at first seems, darling."

Lothaire sighed a relaxed breath.  "Besides, you said it yourself.  What sort of divinity would approve of a place like this?  None that I can truly think of.  None that would allow such an innocent soul as yourself dwell in a place of such depravity.  And if you'd like, maybe there's something mutual we can give to each other."

[Haze]

Naamiah flinched involuntarily as the man beside her saw through her, sucking in a deep breath to calm herself down. Innocent soul. Well - he was quite right there. She might not have been the bravest of people, she might not have been the most observant, but she knew enough that tears were not helping her plight and that with all the things that had been said between them, she now needed to be at the top of her game. She couldn't be weak and self pitying any longer. She had to be smarter, stronger - something was shifting in the air, and she did not want to be caught up in it's current.  

Without moving anything but her head to get a better look at this man, still avoiding looking in once place for any length of time she considered his offer. "What is it you think we could give each other? You know what I am good for," she breathed a heavy sigh, "is that still want you want? What you paid for?"

[Lion]

The man called Lothaire just grinned at her a little and while she was lovely, truly a beauty to behold, what was prominent outside couldn't hold him.  He laughed a little at her offer, perhaps even condescendingly so, but he didn't let his face reflect such a notion.  He leaned across to her and laid a soft kiss on her should before retreating backwards and letting the fingers of his free hand smooth over where his lips had touched.

He took his hand away and then looked her in the eye.  "I can offer you the chance to obtain your freedom.  For good.  Not merely a minute to a moment.  But a chance to be truly free. You...will help me dismantle this blasphemous temple piece by piece.  Your aid...and your loyalty are all I truly require.  Your flesh?  Well, perhaps another time."