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In Mental Shambles

Started by Goldie, June 11, 2006, 03:52:27 PM

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Goldie

ooc: LMAO, I like genies!  xDDDDDDD and a whipping, or course, is totally called for in this instance! *breaks out her miniature wrist-whipper*

ic:

Eirene clutched her chest and willed her heart to stop its painful aches as she struggled to hold onto the last bit of consciousness she could muster.  She was far too close to give up now, especially with a secret like this.  How could she face the Matron tomorrow?  It needed to be today, and it would not behoove her to lose control of her mind, not now.  Not this close.  If death was what awaited her meeting, then she would face it then, not before.  If she had magic, then she would let that truth destroy her, not some stupid disease that threatened her life everyday.

Ha!  Why was she even scared?  She faced death everytime her sickness grew, everytime she forgot to take the medication that kept the attacks at bay (or at least attempted).  Facing death now was no different than the times she found herself fading from consciousness, always unsure if she would wake from this one or continue on into the spirit realm.

Scared....

No, she wasn't scared of death.

She was scared of failure, of being unable to keep herself upright to accept her fate whatever it may be.  She was scared that she would be destroyed by the same stupid illness that took her mother away.  Death didn't scare her.

But failure did.

She would not fail.

She nodded weakly at Rizzen's request.  She could try to hold on, just for a little while longer.  All she needed was enough time for the Matron to arrive...or the runner to grab the Matron and then sprint back...whatever.  All that mattered was she keep her head high and her eyes focused.

She kept her hand firmly planted against the wall until she realized that the very act of standing sent her head spinning.  The pain was subsiding, but she knew that it would only come back with a vengence in a few moments time.  It did not like to give up its prey.  The attack would be worse this time too....she hadn't eaten in what felt like weeks, and she had been running away from an unknown terror without sleep.  Nothing could stop the attack once it decided to weave its way into her consciousness.  Especially now that she was severely weakened by her flight from whatever village that had been...

With a shudder, she sunk to her knees and then proceeded to slide on to her behind, resting her back against the wall with her eyes lightly closed to keep the spinning world from threatening her more.  

"I'll try..." she muttered, pressing her hands against the cold floor to keep herself rooted to reality, "Oh God, I'll try...."

Let the Matron come soon.....


ooc: if there are more typos than usual I apologize...... >_>  I just had my Senior Music Recital....and went out for a few drinks afterwards...ahahahahahaha...... xDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

Anonymous

((See!  Corporal punishment works!  I didn't take a year to reply again =D go me!))

Don't die, Rizzen thought as Eirene sank to the ground.  At least, don't die until the Matron decides that you're a magic user.  Then she could be taken to the dungeons and hopefully the jailer would see that she was too weak to be interrogated.  It was a nice thought, but if she was a mage and got this far in the castle there was an equal chance that some spectacle would be made out of her death.

The only promising thing he could see was that her story would be told as it was: A mage came to the Matron, begging for death and got it.  There would be no embellishment.

It seemed like everyone in the castle was coming through this hallway.  Hearing their lone footsteps drumming in the floor annoyed him - it was even more annoying when a group decided to walk through.  The Matron would have an entourage, so he mistook them for Fahmida bringing the Matron, or at the very least a portion of her cronies.

Today, the Matron had a meeting with one Lady Helena Maud, who was running late.  So Jinny tapped her foot against the grass of her visiting garden and watched Paris squirm in his chair and pick at his coat.  Her dogs even put their heads on their paws, she didn't blame them.  The rest of her work for the day was either waiting for tomorrow or had been delegated down to another person, the only thing keeping her from working in her garden for the rest of the day was this meeting with Helena.

Who was late.

A young lefteanant scrambled over to her table, saluted and told her that her visitor was on the verge of collapsing in the hallway, that she had been attacked by bandits and wanted to see her before she was taken off the infirmary.  The fool.  Maybe it hadn't been wise not to tell Helena why she wanted to meet with her that day.  Jinny stood, her dogs jumping to their feet and Paris eying her, wondering if he was to stay or go.  Whatever happened to Helena, the meeting for today would have to be postponed, so Jinny waved the boy away and ordered the young lefteanant to take her to Helena.  They were joined in the hall by a woman in casual clothing, who gave her a salute.  Another guard, one who probably hunted down the lefteanant so she wouldn't violate some mysterious military code about dealing with her.  The code didn't seem to be violated by taking her where she needed to be, so the woman led the Matron, with her hounds trotting at her heels, to see poor hysterical Helena.

While the lefteanant slunk away once the guardswoman took over, Jinny added her secretary and General Deimos' assistant Chornal Alven to the group as they went.  The secretary to take down notes about the bandits that attacked Helena and Chornal Alven because, if she knew Helena she'd appreciate having an escort she could go back and brag to her neighbors about.  Chornal Alven was at least trustworthy enough not to fluster the poor woman too much.

Rizzen tried not to be excited when he heard another group of footfalls coming from the direction Fahmida ran off in.  Boots and what sounded like bare skin against the floor.  The group turning the corner marked the first time he'd ever been happy to see Fahmida, because she had a group with her and it was obvious, even if he hadn't seen her before, that the Matron was one of them.  

The Matron wore a green and brown brocade coat with brown fur on the cuffs and the hem, which stopped at her hips, dark brown pants and ankle boots made from the same brocade as her coat.  Her red hair, which was grey at the temples and streaked throughout, was in a loose knot at the base of her head and her face was lined.  She stood straight, with her hands on her pockets and a bit of a frown on her face when Fahmida stopped and explained that this was her visitor.

The dogs at the Matron's heels, tall and rust red with fluffy fur, looked at Rizzen and Eirene, their ears swiveling toward them.  The two people at the Matron's heels, a brown haired young woman wearing a colourful skirt and a white blouse with a satchel of writing supplies over her shoulder and a man with ash-blonde hair in an immaculate military uniform, looked nervous and unreadable respectively.

That woman lying on the ground wasn't the Lady Helena - and it looked like she'd been chased out of the infirmary by one of the patients.  Jinny wasn't the type whose curiosity was piqued by strange things, now she was more annoyed that this wasn't the person she was waiting on.  But, here she was and apparently the woman wanted to see her for some reason.  Jinny glanced down at her dogs, who stood placidly at her heels, their eyes on the woman.

"Miss," Jinny said curtly.  "Chornal Alven is going to escort you to the infirmary, I will walk with him and you will tell me why you're here to see me."

Chornal Alven began walking toward them as soon as the Matron said he would be escorting the young woman.  Rizzen watched Fahmida, who looked a little confused, the secretary, who was also out of her element, and then watched Chornal Alven kneel in front of Eirene.  He looked like he wouldn't have a problem carrying Eirene if she was too weak to walk, though he was extending his hands to her now, to help her stand.

((Lol~ Oh that'll be me in the next two weeks if I survive this wonderful holiday inspection.  It'll be all OMG!  Teh yay!  *drowns in alcohol*))

Goldie

ooc: Haha, yay!  I've had the hardest time with this post....it's been a draft for forever Dx   BTW!  How did that writing story of death thing go?  Did you finish!?

ic:

Now that it came down to it, Eirene's nerves began to rise.  The Matron was here...now...and she was simply wasting her time because she thought that she was a mage.  This woman ran an entire country, why would she even bat an eye at this insignificant girl.  The moment that "mage" left her lips, the Matron may simply signal the guards and have her shot on spot.  She could have saved her the trouble and just jumped off a building instead.  Now she was simply wasting her time with this silly problem...

And then word would reach her brother.  Oh Gods he would be so disappointed.  His little sister, the one that he had tried so hard to protect over the years...that protection had been in vain.  She was just going to die here, alone, afraid, and a mage.  Gods...it would crush him.  And if Teague ever returned...

She didn't even want to think about it.  It was much too hard.

But she was here now...if she just shrugged her shoulders and said "never mind" that would be far worse than just stating her business...and perhaps just as deadly.  No one could really decipher what would happen either way.  She just hoped that the Matron would be merciful and that her death would be as peaceful as possible.  After all, she was upholding the laws of the land even if it was against her own health and well being.  Her own life, really.  But...maybe this wasn't what the matron was suppose to do?  Maybe they had a mage clean-up crew?  Would she be more angry?

Gods what did it matter!?  She was stalling.  After being taken away to some unknown place, realizing that something was not right, traveling on her own back to her own country where she knew what the penalty would be....Gods....she needed to stop stalling and just let it all out.  She could feel her heart beating faster again.  Fast enough that another spell was about to happen.

She didn't have time to stall, not now.

After all...the attacks were worse because of her lack of dietary needs, stress, and fear.  For all she knew, she would tell the Matron her suspicions and then die.  Not at the hand of some executioner, but because of this stupid illness.

"My Lady..." she began softly, taking the man's hand and raising to her feet.  She would not let him carry her.  She would walk on her own, with her own pride, until she didn't have a choice.  However, her strength would not let her walk without his aid, and she leaned heavily upon his arm, letting him hold her slight weight as she walked forward, hoping that the Matron would walk slowly.  Otherwise there would be no way that she could keep up.

"My Lady...I don't know what you were told...but I was not attacked by bandits on the road....I....I live in the village, I've always upheld the laws....I was kidnapped...I have a heart condition that flared and I passed out...when I woke...." she blinked once or twice as tears came to her eyes.  Gods, here it came, "I was someplace else" her voice was barely over a whisper, "I found out later that I had been taken to Serendipity...but...everything around me felt wrong....the air was too thick to breathe....I felt like I was being smothered....I escaped....ran away....and....when I touched people there was a shock between us...like....I was causing some sort of electric shock....I think they could feel it...they would look at me like I had just stolen something from them....I thought....I thought that maybe...." she breathed, "maybe I have magic....I do not want to be a danger to anyone....I came here....as fast as I could...."

Breathe...oh Gods breathe....she could feel her vision fading quickly, her heart aching fiercely within her chest. Struggling to maintain consciousness the young woman blinked rapidly, her amber eyes going in and out of focus.

"When I....when I got here" she breathed heavily, her knees shaking with the effort it took to keep standing, "Everything disappeared....I was better....." she swayed on her feet into the guard next to her as her knees buckled.  She did all in her power to keep her eyes open to hear the verdict.  If she was going to die she would hear it herself and not upon waking in some dungeon waiting for the noose.

Anonymous

((And the thread gallantly crawls along!  It shall never die!))

The Matron was in no hurry.  If she could wait on Helena, then the Lady could wait on her.  They'd each have a little story to tell before she could get down to business.  She matched pace with Chornal Alven.

They were an odd group, Rizzen admitted as he shuffled along on the other side of the Chornal.  Eirene, leaning on the arm a ranking officer who was the standards and practices come to life; Fahmida, also a living embodiment of the standards and practices even if she wasn't in uniform at the time (Rizzen had no idea why she was tagging along, though the scowl on her face when Eirene began her story promised bad things once he was healed); the Matron's secretary, flittering around like a bird on a seed disk, trying to get a good look at the strange visitor; himself, a beat up guard in a dressing gown; the Matron who, if one were to happen upon them just now, looked like she knew Eirene was coming; and the two dogs walking ahead of them like an honor guard.  Shuffle a few of them around and they might start making sense.  As they were now, anyone that saw them was going to get a headache trying to figure out how they all fit in.

Magic.

The word seemed to set the air in the hallway on fire when Eirene said it.  The secretary squeaked.  Chornal Alven stiffened.  For a second, Fahmida was a beast, rising on her tip toes and curling her hands, ready to pounce on the mage and subdue her.  Rizzen watched Alven, since he was closest, then Fahmida, who seemed most likely to do something rash.  The dogs plodded on, aware of the sudden tension over the bad word, but not concerned.  The Matron studied everyone's reaction, her eyes lingering on the dogs before looking back at Eirene.

Rizzen stole a glance at the Matron's face after he was sure Fahmida wasn't going to do anything.  She had the same expression he'd seen on a company clerk's face while he was doing sums.  Adding what she had and waiting to see what the outcome was.  He should have reacted a little more, maybe a jump, an indignant look.  Not that that would do any good if Eirene decided to add that she told him all this before telling the Matron, but just in case.

"Carrissa," The Matron said at last.  If her secretary hadn't jumped and turned to face her, Rizzen would have thought it was an odd thing to say after hearing a tale like Eirene's.  "Find General Verde, or one of his assistants, and bring me the black case from the secure vaults."  Carrissa didn't waste any time, dashing down the hallway with a rustle of parchment, her heels clacking against the floor.

Then the Matron looked down at Eirene.  One of her eyebrows was raised a little, the ends of her mouth pulled back just slightly.  It could have been a smile, but the eyebrow and the tilt of her head made it seem more like curiosity.  "Do you think you can walk on your own Miss?  If not, I will have Chornal Alven carry you the rest of the way to the infirmary."

This time, Rizzen was able to keep from acting naturally (which, in this case, would have been shock) and instead watched, keeping his expression neutral and setting his hands in the pockets of his robe.  Fahmida was lost, looking down at Eirene, at the Matron and at the ever calm Chornal Alven before scowling at Rizzen again.

((I epic failed on the writing story of death.  Didn't have enough words DX.  I think 20% of them were describing this weird fruit in chapter two.  Which shall henceforth be known as the word count fruit.))

Goldie

ooc: Never!  Never die!  I'm back to keep the crawling moving onward! haha...I've decided it's about time for me to actually do some posts >_>

ic:

It was terrifying, the tension that filled the room.  Everyone seemed to be staring from the small, blonde, stupid magic girl and back to the Matron.  She had sealed her fate by coming here...almost idiotically hoping for some sort of cure...but more likely simply walking to death.  Had she really been that hopeful for a cure?  Did she really want to die?

Now that everything was actually happening it seemed much more real.  This was going to be her final night...possibly her final hours of life.  After the Matron was done with her questions surely Eirene would then find herself facing some horrible, terrible fate.  Hopefully it would be quick because she came in herself and didn't hide away her abilities...a quick gunshot to the head....nothing drawn out...surely...

Gods she hoped it wouldn't be drawn out....at this point she would almost prefer to hear her horrible fate and die from the disease that threatened to carry her away each day...

"I...I think I can...." she wanted to say she could walk, but the more sensible part of her brain scolded her for believing it was true. She slumped into the man's hands, giving up on her pride and allowing herself to be as frail and weak as she truly was...

"Thank you..." she finished lamely. "I am sorry for being such a burden..."


ooc: OMG EPIC FAIL ON THIS POST! >_< but...there isn't much that Eirene can do now is there? *sob* I feel like a failure...please don't hate me....