Spirits of the Earth

OOC: This is an OPEN BY REQUEST thread. Please PM me if interested in joining, as this thread is affected by the Connlaothian Civil war. The character, though not address by his name, is Killian Gryst (http://www.spiritsoftheearth.net/smf/index.php?topic=13788.msg116647#msg116647), who is about 27ish in this thread, which is at the end of year 8 of the war, and during the long, harsh winter.


Yay found someone to jump in :D
ALSO!
trigger warning- as there is blood and mature content afoot!.

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Heavy breaths made his throat raw, and heavy steps made his legs lead, feeling useless, worthless, hopeless as he pressed through the unknown, through the cold, a single soldier on his back, while his own arm dripped a lengthy trail of blood. The surprise attack on Fort Dhagh had caused he and the men at his post a great number of casualties.... and he could only think that, perhaps if not for the thick blanket of snow, they could have had the upper hand.

But he had a job to do, and the echoing voices of the battle left heavy scars in his heart, and at one point he still believed he was a youth, but in that day, during that battle, he felt himself becoming a true man.

Innocence was dead, as was the sun, that had long since faded away into the blizzarding night. And though he ached, he refused to stop, that was, until he paused to realize- the injured man on his back was dead.

Throwing the soldier down into the snow, he paused in the moment, shivering from the cold, shivering from the sorrow, and shivering as if wishing for his own defeat. He had not come this way without his own injuries, but in a foolish attempt to save a life, he had grabbed his companion, who had taken the brunt of the canon that had spilled their cart and horse- and down intoa  ravene they had tumbled.

He supposed they were lucky to be alive, as he recalled laying there, his entire body stunned. And though the explosion barely marred him, the fall did. A large tree branch was jutting out from his arm, bloodied and glistening red in whatever daylight could break through the relentless snow. And he didn't know how he did it, or even why, but he found the strength to rise, found the strength to move on... but was it all for nothing?

Staring down, he realized he couldn't feel his arm, and out of desperation in the moment, he began to tear at his clothes. Upon examining the wound, and trying to get his arm to lift, to move, to do anything, he realized that his limb was dead.

And just like that...
The snow lifted, just as his blue eyes gave way to the bubbling swell of fresh, salty tears.



Was it hours that passed? Was it hours that he changed? Was it hours that made him realize the hopelessness in this game? His heart burned so much for the woman who felt like worlds away, and now, to him, she was all he had left. And he knew, this could not be the end.

Fumbling through the night, he managed a fire and used it to defrost his limbs, or limb, for no matter how hard he tried, the limb turning dark, turning blue, turning grey-
He could feel and move nothing. And recalling another soldier who suffered the same fate, he came to realize he had but one choice-

Keep the limb, but it's death would poison him.
Or cut it off. And that thought, was almost too much to bear.
And it seemed like hours again that he fought, realizing that the only solution, the only way to surviving and ever getting back to see her, was to do it-

To remove his arm and use the heat of the fire to seal the wound shut.




And so after man moments of sobbing, of shaking, of tears streaming down his face and snot, down his nose, he rose his blade, now freshly sharpened-


And removed the limb in a few, gut wrenching strikes.
But with each hit, with each cut, he thought of her face, until he could see her no more but the pain, and the blood was everywhere, and he was manic, almost too far gone to realize what he must do. But as he writhed, the blood staining the snow all around him, he managed to grab for the fire- and sealed the wound shut.

And as he lay there, the sharp winds of the dying storm cutting through his long hair, he felt his tears rolling down his face, as his cheeks sunk into the snow- not realizing how far his screaming echoes would go.

The cold winds carried the cries far and a bird, with the size of a dragon large enough to carry a few people looked up. Not just a bird; a phoenix. With feathers despite not burning in her current state, still had the beautiful colors of red, orange and yellow with some patterns.

It was not often Silmeria descended from the skies. But she needed to eat and drink regulary. She had taken down a large deer and ate its flesh until the screams reached her.

''A person... out in this weather?'' she thought. It had been a while since she had actual interaction with someone. 416 or 417 years to be more exact. And it had not been a happy parting.

''None of my business...'' she muttered as she washed her beak in the snow. Still it was a cry of pain. Terror. Surely most of her encounters with mortals had been nothing but pain and betrayal. She spreaded her wings ready to take flight since her meal was over.
Something gnawed at her conscious. It was not like this person was responsible for all her suffered pain right? And not all of the people she had encountered left her with bad experiences.

''I suppose I could check it out.'' she said eventually to herself and sighed deeply. If the person had bad intentions the deer would not be the only thing she killed this night. But she would not meet the source of the scream like this. No.

It was in a spur of a moment that the calm feathers all seemed to catch flame and changed form. Or rather, she did. When the flames were gone, there was a young woman where the phoenix was before. With hair as white as snow. Skin color of fair porselain and raspberry red lips. Her clothes a simple white dress that reached till halfway her upperlegs, with black laces. On both her arms were sleeves seperated from the actual dress. Her stomach section was exposed. On her feet were white boots and black stockings till about her knees. With a knife she removed leftover meat from the deer and packed it in some of its skin.

She felt her hair after cleaning her hands to make sure there were no stray feathers and picked up her bag. Removing a black leather belt and two swords from it. After putting the belt over her dress and attached the swords, Silmeria swung the bag over her shoulders and headed to the direction of the scream.

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Silmeria had not expected two men. Both or one had managed somehow to get a weak fire going. But it was the blood she had noticed first and bit her lip. The persons looked weak from their wounds and she would not be suprised if they were dead or dying. Even if they would attack her she could always strike first. But she could not help but feeling sorry for them.

With that thought, she approached them.
''If you stay that way you freeze to death.'' she said calm and kindly and focussed on the fire. Taking control of it and made the flames warmer.

She appeared from a whole other world, for when his ice blue eyes opened all he could see was a swirling world of snow, blue skies and ice. Her white hair blended into this world, those eyes like something he'd never seen. Was this a dream? Was she- an angel to appear before him? If so- was he dead?

He opened his lips, which were cracked, fresh blood opening as they moved. But he could say nothing, could move nothing- his body, his world-

All numb and as unfeeling as the snow.

Silmeria looked at the man for a moment before aproaching further and jnejt down beside him. The thought of turning into her true form and embrace this young man in her wings crossed her mind.

''Shhhh..lets get you warm ok? '' she whispered and knelt down beside him. She noticed his arm and lowered her head as if in defeat. It would most likely infect like this later. Bit it was not what she felt like she had to do. After placing her bag in the snow she retrieved a blanket from it and gently helped Killian sit up. Her touch and body temperature was warm and after positioning Killian properly she held him close. Wrapping the blanket around the both of them. ''There. Much better isnt it? '' she said. Silmeria could feel how cold he was and she hoped that despite he hasmd list a lot of blood and his arm he would survive.

''You are lucky though... you could have had the winterwinds as eternal lullaby. What is your name.'' For now, she would have to try to keep this stranger conscious

He had no idea what was going on, those blue eyes wondering and lost. By the time his mind came around, his lips were shivering- and he, still unable to reply as teeth chattered and his body shook from the cold against her. If there was something odd about her warmth he was in no state of mind to question it, and whens he posed her question, he did try to answer, but only breaths and trembles came out as he choked and shivered.

Silmeria brought her body as close to Killians as she could. ''If you can not speak now it is alright. Just do not fall asleep.'' She closed her eyes slowly expending her aura of warmth. She was not sure what to say further. Afraid she'd might say something wrong. So she started to softly sing instead.

''Gods that are up high
Do you hear my prayer
Sent to you by the sparks of this burning pyre

...''

As she continued the song she allowed her head to rest beside his so he could not see her face. Releasing a few silver tears which she picked from her cheek with one of her fingers before pulling back a little bit and applied them on his torn lip. With her tears in his bloodstream hopefulky whatever damage there was would be fixed. The song finished. ''You are safe now. When you can speak tell me your name. My name, is Silmeria.''

He didn't know what to call this state of being. He was at death's door, yet also becoming as calm as a child at a mother's lullaby. And the closeness, it made him shiver all the more as he felt the warmth come to him. Though she told him not to sleep, his eyes began to drift close, too weak to remain open. The only thing he listened to then, was the bubbling warmth the pair shared, which somehow masked the winds that now whipped at the trees and the skies, darkening, threatening with more snow.

''Looks like I have no choice...'' Silmeria muttered to herself. Studdying the mans condition she had two options; getting them both naked or changing form. But she felt the first would not be enough in this case.

''I have to blindfold you for a bit. Just a bit. Do not worry though. I will not hurt you or let you be prey to wolves or anything else. You must not remove the blindfold under any condition''

She removed one of her sleeves and gently wrapped it around his head. It would not prevent him seeing the shades of fire but he would not see her form would he sudden open his eyes.
The finished the blindfold with a gentle knot  and made sure that it was not to tight but not to easy to remove either.

Silmeria wrapped the blanket a little more around the stranger and exited it herself. Resting her head against his chest. ''Do not fear. My fire will not hurt you.'' she spoke before flames surrounded her. Some flames licking Killians skin but Silmeria made sure they would feel like warm wind on his face. When the flames were gone she was back in her majestic form and shifted around before using her head to move him against her warm soft feathery body, and placed her wing over him like an extra blanket.

With Killian between her body and wing, and out of the winds path, he should be able to warm up properly while the tears, if they worked, would heal his wounds.

Not able to properly fight back, even if he wanted to, Killian trembled at the cold, at the unknown- but the display of colors, the warmth...
He didn't know what to make of it, but it was all his senses could take. And once his body began to warm up, his eyes slowly closed and soon he was asleep, protected by the chill and the snow until he awoke several hours later with a start, confused as to how there was a woman overtop of him, and how it was both were not turned into human ice cubes.

Once Killian was warm enough Silmeria had returned to her humanform and wrapped him and herself in the blanket. She had removed the blindfold as well and at some point dozed off. At the least she had removed the blindfold.

As Killian woke though her eyes opened as well and greeted him with a smile.''looks like you are awake. Good. It means you will live.'' She moved a bit away from him so she could stand and walk but did make sure Killian was still in the blanket. The fire despite being out of fuel was still burning giving off a welcoming warmth.''are you hungry? Or more thirsty.'' She said as she took some cooking materials from her bag

Killian just stared, hardly believing what was going on as he rubbed the back of his head.
"I must've hit my head harder than I thought.. but er.. excuse me, Miss... but uh- who.. who are you? And..." As he looked around, he had a sinking suspicion of just why they were out in the cold and snow- though all of his memories hadn't clearly come back to him.
"Where.. where are we? Is this... is this still the Kilanthros?"

''We are in the Sirantil Valley.'' Silmeria replied as she put some of the deerfat she packed last night in a pan which she placed on some stones in the fire.''That is the only name I know the region by.'' She took the meat out of her bag too and defroze it gently before seasoning it.''Silmeria is my name. What is yours?'' She asked.'' You must have went through hell. When I found you you were almost dead.'' His friend was what she had not mentioned yet or his arm. But Silmeria valued life enough to at least having positioned his friend more peacefully and covered him with a blanket before he had become frozen solid.

Killian's face twisted quizzically.
"The valley?" And as he looked around, it would appear as if they had found their way at the base of the mountains. Had he truly traveled that far? Looking back over at the woman, he took her in for a moment before repeating her name.
"Silmeria?" He paused, thinking it over as he blinked. "So you... you found me out here?" he went on to ask, seemign to forget to give his name in return.

''I heard you. And then found you. Be glad I am a pyromancer or you'd be frozen to death know. I have kept you warm none stop.'' She cut the deer meat in more edible sizes before putting them in the pan causing them to sizzle. She did not bake the meat long though. It was red meat. Raw was always the best but she knew most stomachs could not handle it. She brought Killian a plate with the meats when it was done.''eat. Man whose name I do not yet know.'' She said with a warm motherly smile.''you need your strength... and lost a lot of blood.''

Killian simply stared at her, her words registering but it was hard to digest. Pyromancer?

"So you're a mage then?" he asked, accepting the plate but not quite eating.

''Yes.'' She said and waved with her hand creating several birds made of flame. Her blue eyes becoming as red as fire itself but were gentle. ''I can create, manipulate and form fire.'' The birds flew to Killian and settled on his shoulder but they were not hot or burning him or the clothes he wore. ''Also heat.'' She said before she let the birds fly away and vanished

Killian remained still, eyes still wide at what she displayed before sputtering, "It.. it is not safe for you here." And his voice was hoarse, and his body, still trembling slightly. "You're in a land ravaged by war- and magic... Magic here is outlawed."

''Humans and their wars... magic exists way longer then they do and now they banned it?'' She sighed deeply.''So nothing has changed the past 416 years...'' she paused.''If magic is prohibited thrn that is their problem. Since my existence itself as I currently am is magic. If there are patrols I doubt that they find us here.'' Her expression went from slightly annoyed to kind again and she reduced the fire to a normal ember. ''But since you seem to fear so much I will hold back. Eat. It is still warm.''

"I fear much, yes, my choices along with it. You see.. I'm a fallen soldier, though I fought for the side against magic I........ I do not know what I am to think. I.. it's.. hard to believe it is all evil. But after I saw what can happen to men on either side..." He shook his head, trying to blink back tears before his blue eyes went down to where his arm ought to have been- and he simply stared at it, as if for eternity.

"It is hard to believe war is the answer to anything.."

''...'' A silence fell over Silmeria. ''I would lie if I said I never have been in a war. I thought... was made belueve that all the battles I fought and armies I lead massacering the enemy was good. For the kindom. Until I realised I was used and killed innocent people. But war... it is for fear. Land. Money. Jealousy Selfishness. It is never good. But a war against magic... it is not like we choose to have it. Be born like this. But you know... a person who is crazy wielding a dagger is more deadly then a mage who wishes to coexist with his or her magic.'' She casted Killian a firm look. Which softened as she whispered an apology to him.''Fortunatly... people change''

At her last words, Killian released a chilled sigh.
"That is the only thing I can pray for.... Change... but change for the good. What world this is.... it's like Hell on earth." And he grit his teeth at the idea he no longer had his limb because of it- and may have also lost the love of his life for it, too.

Solita was back at the castle, and who knew what horrors she might endure beneath the Grand Duke's clutches. And he allowed it all to happen-
But did he really have a choice?

It was after a moment that he lifted his gaze to Silmeria.
"I'm Killian," he told her softly. "Killian Gryst. A soldier, just a simple soldier.. but before that.."
He gave a dry laugh at the memory.
"I was a simple apple farmer."

''I am... just Silmeria. If I am going to tell you every title and name I have had in my life then we might as well built a house and live in it.'' she said as she sat down in front of him and stole a small piece of the deer steak. ''I suggest finishing this before it is frozen.'' she noted.

''If it is not to much trouble... can you tell me more about this war? You see I... have been away for a few hundred years so... I have no clue what is going on here now. If you do not like to talk about it then it is alright... there are more ways to find out..''

It was then Killian looked down at the offered food and his stomach began to soft, painful rumblings of hunger. Gratefully, he ate what he could, and was surprised at what he was able to keep down, but at her question, he grew silent, and slowed down at the end of his meal before he wiped the blood and juices from his lips and looked up at her.

"Then you have missed much." And he paused to study her, "How much do you know of this land? Of Connlaoth- and those kingdoms at it's boarder?"

''Connlaoth... not much. Truth be told I mainly minded my own business. Lets just say that most of my experiences with people was not a good one. So I tend to mostly avoid contact'' she admitted ''the history and knowledge I have is outdated... there was a dislike to magic though I know that much but not that it was forbidden or anything. My guess, fear and jealoussy. The two that in the end results in creating monsters in the first place but that is beside the point..'' she said. ''But yea... I recall something that despite they descent from Serenian people there is not much liking in magic in these regions.''

Killian gave a sage nod.
"Yes.. well, the hate has gone to the extreme. Connlaoth.. here.. people used to accept it, though we feared it. I... must admit I knew little of those who possess magic until I was already signed up for the war. I... I joined in hopes to protect my family, to better myself... but here I find as if.. if anything, it is teaching me everything I would think it would not."

His form wilted as he peered down at his missing limb again, blue eyes lingering where the arm  should have been.

"Thank you.." he whispered. "I... I know you rescued me but...." he lifted his gaze to her. "A life... even one, is a great gift. I know this, after all the hell I've been through. And though I'm not sure what sort of fate awaits me now in the scars of the battle I have fallen from- at least know the life you have saved is grateful."

And perhaps.. if he were lucky, he could find a way to get back to the capital, to get to Solita, to find her, to take her- and to run away from all of this mess.

''Just do not make regret it.'' Silmeria said.''You do not seem like one though who would ruin the gift of life.'' Her gaze went to the man killian had carried. Dead and frozen beneath the white cloak the had placed over him''He... should be given a proper burial. Did he have family? Perhaps he holds something on him that should be brought to them if that is the case. You seem troubled. Meaning that you have a goal. I can accompany you for a bit. You are not fit to travel alone and I would like wasting all effort I put into keeping you alive.''

It was only then was he confronted with death again. His eyes lingered over the clothe as he grit his teeth and felt a pang clutch his gut. He gave a shake of his head.
"I did not know him well." But he was uncertain how to go about handling the body, though he supposed even a small, marked burial out here was better than nothing. He turned to Silmeria.

"You wouldn't happen to have a shovel? I'm afraid if we dig by hand in these sort of conditions..."
and not to mention he had only one hadn in which to serve... "We would have exhausted ourselves thoroughly."

''No shovel. I can unfreeze the soil though. Only with heat. Nobody will see it. The only other option would be a funeral pyre.'' The latter would be able to draw attention though.''It is your call which of the two it will be. A soldier never should become food for wolves.''

Killian gave a nod.
'Then I shall take your assistance in warming the dirt. Even if I have to use my hands, I agree with you. He should at least be buried." He would have wanted the same fate to himself, had he fallen as well.

''Understood.'' Silmeria said and got on her feet. She looked around first. Making sure she saw nobody in the valley before she looked at a place. By merely looking at it the snow started to melt and even the water just seemed to evaporate. Unable despite the cold to turn into new snow.

She then started to dig away the dirt with her hands. In a way that made it visable she actually had done field work in her life somewhere. Even heavy rocks she encountered were effortlessly put aside.

Killian worked along side her, and was impressed at how well adapted she was at this. But he was grateful for the help. Having one arm.. it was quite limiting. Once the hole was large enough, he moved over to the body and slowly removed the sheet that laid over top of him. And he stared at the dead. He looked strange... Pale, and unmoving. Killian tried not to stare for long, but noticed a chain around his neck. Removing the necklace, he examined it in the light. And in doing so, noted an engraving on the inside of the ring.

"To love forever, I give to thee my heart, Isabel."

''If possible we should maybe find the one who gave it to him. There is nothing worse then worrying about the one you love might be. Not knowing if dead, or alive.'' Silmeria said.

''I am not the one searching recently deceased bodies. But we could look for more. Perhaps a clue. If you can not handle it we keep it as it is and give him a proper burial.''
It did not really matter to her wether the man deserved it or not. Heck he could be a mage hater. Have more bad things on his plate then her. But there was no need to judge over someone she would never know and give him the benefit of the doubt. Being in a basicly nameless grave was perhaps bad too. No recognition. Nobody remembering him or speaking his name with the passage of time.

Killian clutched the necklace, silently praying, making a vow. And when he lowered his hand, he rested the necklace back on the man's chest.
"He will keep this. It was meant for him. His lover... That would be like searching a needle in a hay stack. And we haven't the luxury. We're surrounded by war."

''Fair enough.'' Silmeria replied wrapping the dead man a little more in the blanket before positioning him in the grave.
Half an hour later Silmeria placed the final rock on the nameless grave.

''Now the wolves should not be able to reach him.'' she said as she washed the dirt from her hands with snow before searching through her bag. ''I have rations for one more day. But have the tools to hunt. You should be the one to guide the way and I will follow until you either want me away or when you are strong enough. Does that sound agreeable to you?'' she made sure her swordsheats were in their place. ''Just be honest when you feel cold or fatigued.''

"Just ask you away? But you've helped me immensely... Is there not something I could do in return?"

''There is. Not making me regret helping you... or actually... not making me regret interacting with mankind again.'' a small smile formed on her face. ''I would just like to have some good painless memories as well.'' by the way she said it, it sounded like she was not going to say a lot more on the matter.

''There is a but. Despite weak I use magic constantly. Will that be a problem?''

With that, Killian offered her a smile.
"Very well. I am indebted to you. But the only thing I could offer is to perhaps help you get away from this kingdom. You use magic, and as I said before, here it is forbidden. And your magic... Do you know what a mordecai is?"

''Can not say that I do.'' Silmeria admitted. ''Sounds like the name of some exotic delicacy that has been fermenting in the ground for a few months.'' she replied as she cleaned the pan she used to bake the steak in before puting it in her bag which she swung over her shoulder. ''But something tells me my guesses are rather wrong.''

Killian gave a small smile when he nodded.
"They're a rare type of person who possesses an antimagical ability that the Connlaothians find invaluable. If we... Were to come across one... It is possible your magics might be subjected to them.... Turned off."

''If that is the case, they wish they had stayed away from me. I can promise you that. I look like this... but my true form is something way different. And thus far. Those who see it for the first time, tended to call me a monster or at the least think it with fearful faces.'' she did not seem worried in the slightest. Would a mordecai cross their path and prove a threat she'd simply remove it. ''What happens to the mages they encounter?'' she asked.

"Well, in this war- if the mage is hostile they're more or less put down. Some are captured if they surrender, but their fate isn't much greater. But that's the duty of most soldiers, I'm certain the mordecai have some stricter code."

ANd he thought back to the way the mordecai treated Solita, and felt his blood burn.
"You needn't worry about the mordecai. As a soldier... I.. I can give you an alibi. But I'm afraid I have no idea what to do now. My.... my patrol had been defeated, adn I was lucky to get out alive."

'Put down..' those words made her clench her teeth and the fire seemed to burn more intenser for that moment too.''No need to give me an alibi... would we find mordecai wont it be better for you to claim you have captured me instead? That at the least would save you right? '' she inhaled briefly.''We should move. We are to exposed for both bandits and the weather''

"Captured?" He looked completely taken back by the idea. He shook his head.
"N-no... I would never. Besides.. it's not like.. well.." he gave her a sheepish look. "Its not like you look like a mage."
If mages could look like anything. To him- most looked like ordinary people. Except Solita...
Her elven ears were pretty obvious to her fae ancestry.

''Looks are deceiving Killian. I look human but I killed dragons on my own. Destroyed an entire bloodline and the army singlehandedky. Not sure how you view me with my white hair and thus far kind behaviour but I am not what I look like. Now. Show me what it is that filled your eyes with purpose''

"Purpose?" He repeated softly, his eyes going down to the snow. He immediately thought to Solita, his eyes wavering over the fact that, despite his survival, he wasn't sure he'd ever see her again.

''Your eyes seemed so goalfilled earlier.'' she explained. ''I am sure that there is some place you'd like to see or somewhere you would like to go.''

With that, Killian lifted his blue eyes to meet her's.
"My goal was to protect this land that my family has lived on for so many years. I believed from the start, I was doing the right thing. Doing this all to make my family proud and to honor them. But now... after all I've been through.. what I've lost..."
He grit his teeth as he looked down at the stump that had once been his arm. He placed his hand over it, as if to touch the arm that was no longer there before that hand clenched into a fist.

"My morals have been tried and tested, broken and bruised. And I found love- in a mage of all things- and the Grand Duke... he personally took her away from me and now.. now I don't even know if I have anything left to fight for. She could be dead, or worse- and I'm out here.. floundering away," he went on, eyes welling with tears as he choked on a sob. "Lost, cold and no where near the place  I used to call home."

''I'm sorry... I said something insensitive right?'' she approached him and took his hand in her warm ones.

''The grand duke... if he took her away from you why not claim her back yourself. I  can help you. Also. If you have sins to atone for... then atone for them. There is always something left to fight and live for.

''My heart was shattered by the person I loved. He betrayed me.'' mentioning it alone revealed it still hurt her since itwas able to see in her eyes. ''Lets go see the grand duke. And claim back your love. And then. Find a place for you to call home.''

Killian was taken back by her suggestion.
"Go to the Grand Duke?"
He shook his head. "That would be suicide..."
But as he looked at his missing arm, his frown deepened as a cold wind fluttered his tattered, white-blonde hair about his face.

"And home... who knows what that is anymore with this war. And sins? We've all got them... I just..."
He grit his teeth.
"I... I don't even know if I'd want to go back to see her now. I... I'm fighting on the side that opposes everything she is and I..."
And he felt his blue eyes prickle with tears as he grit his teeth again, hoping to suppress his sadness.

''Then drop what you are fighting for right now and fight for her. Your homeland. Are Connlaothians not descendants from Serenian folk? Fae folk? Its casting down your own heritage. You love her dont you? Also. Did it cross your mind that punishing mages is horrible? Everyone is born the way they are. There are people with magic, there are people without magic. What is important is the choices you make with the powers you have. One person can be a giant rock dropped in a river changing it's course. But nobody has ever achieved anything by being both fearful and doing nothing because they could not decide. Screw the empire. What have they ever done for you.'' she spoke boldly. Perhaps a bit to much. ''If you are not going to find a way to set her free then I might attempt doing it on my own. Mordecai or not. My dragon tooth blades will cut through their thickest armor if they put on a fight.'' she paused. Realising she might have gone to far again.

''What does your heart tell you Killian. If you work for the empire. Fight for them. Then you should turn me in. Or would you rather fight for who or what you love. Reclaim the home they took from you.''

It was a powerful notion indeed, in which planted a seed that swelled within his breast until the point he was shaking. But even from her passion came resistance from within before he turned to her with a mighty shake of his head.
"No.. I.. I could not do that. To storm the castle? And what? Do so all alone? Even with some help, I'd need an army- and I am no Captain, no General. Just a soldier. And I fear if I were to even consider that... if word got back..."

Gods- what would the Grand Duke do to her? Would he kill her? Have her hung like any other mage that he deemed worthless? And why did he have to choose her out of all of the mages in this war? Why bring her into his palace? The very idea of what could be happening made him sick as he grit his teeth and tried to subdue it, but that only helped to heighten the sensation of illness even more.

''I've been a general for a while but we indeed would need an army... although I managed to take each and every man of that army down on my own...'' Silmeria pondered.

''The old fashioned way of going to the castle and you requesting to see her could at the least give enough information don't you think? If not we could also make someone tell you. Surely higher ranked guards have a home to go to and know where your beloved is. Or at least heard something.

''As ambitious I might be... it will however still be your choice. In the worst case they are using her or she is dead. But if she is alive... I am sure she is waiting for you. But I tell you this from experience. It is best to have an answer then no answer and all and having to keep guessing.''

Killian digested all of this in with his blue eyes cast down to the snow.
"Then perhaps I should head towards the castle... To at least inform them all of the fall of Fort Dhagh... " And maybe find any news... Any news at all about Solita. It was the safest route, and was also his duty. Both to her.. and his country.

''Then we will head towards the castle.'' Silmeria spoke calmly.''Just make sure to let me know when you feel fatigued. If the healing tonic I gave you worked though the wound should be fully healed by now with no sign of infection. And when needed I shall be your blade. Just well. Remember our promise. How many days of travel do you think it will take?''

At her comment, he shook his head.
"In weather like this, it could be months." He grimaced at the idea. "But either way, we have little choice. Staying here will most certainly secure death."

''As long as I can provide warmth for us both at least we will not freeze to death. But if possible crossing a town wont be bad. Provisions are needed too. But if I find game I could take it down too. I should still have enough for a few days and I can carry you from time to time too. You are not heavy.''

She nudged to the direction of their destination and started to take secure steps towards it. For someone not from around here she did knew her ways. Despite the cold, it was noticed when she stood still somewhere for a longer period of time that the snow around them would melt. Also around Killian if he paid attention to it it was not as cold as he might expect.

Killian was still in a daze over all that had happened. But as they began to move, he noticed he could see the ground where they had been sitting, and it was deprived of some snow. Peering over at Silmeria, he followed after and asked, "How does your magic work?"

''My magic mainly is fire and heat. I have a very intimate bond with it. I can create and manipulate fire with movements of my arms and hands. Also if it comes from a different source like a dragon. In theory you can say that I am fire too. I could engulf you in flame and you will feel nothing. Or just as if a warm breeze caresses your skin.'' she said and looked at him over her shoulder. ''However this also means that I carry the same weaknesses as fire does. Meaning I can not travel in rain.'' she had not told  the whole truth but Killian did not need to know she could use her magic without moving her arms and hands. If Killian decided to remain working for the enemy though he had to turn her in as well. A fight she would not take him easy on if he would.

Killian took a moment to digest all of this before giving a slow nod.
"I see. I have barely any real experience with mages, except for those I fought. And well, Solita. Solita's magic is rather different. You see... she's a healer, and that's why the Grand Duke took an interest in her."

''No matter where you are no matter the era. People always want healers.'' As long as they were obedient anyway.'' I am not really a mage... it's a bit complicated for me to say what I am. Mainly due to how people responded when they knew what I was. I have been feared, severly exploited... so it is most likely you will never see what I am. Would the situation arise however I hope you are not afraid at least.''

''I do hope it will not have to come to battle. As much experience I have with it.  I hate it. We just live in a world where its inevitable'' In her mind she recalled the various faces of those who saw her true form and feared it despite the amount of time she had spent with them prior. Some knew she was a phoenix but despite knowing so those fearfilled eyes that looked at her. Were just painfull.

''If you manage to find Solita. Do you intend to escape with her?''

"Are you some sort of a fae?" But then realizing his manners, he gave a shake of his head. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pry." But then thinking over her last comment, he gave a nod. "Yes, if I can."

''Fae?''Silmeria asked and started laughing till tears fell down her cheeks. It had been a while since she had actually laughed like that. ''It's alright to pry. But I will be honest if I'd rather not talk about something. But I suppose if you find out my identity... it is alright too. I am now just not ready for it yet.'' She wiped the tears from her face.''sorry it has been a while since I laughed like that. But about the escaping... I will help you. If needed I know the perfect transport.''

Killian looked at her, still in no mood to smile. It was not entirely is fault he was ignorant towards those possessing magic. It seemed just about every body in this country was.
"I didnt mean to offend. Do not feel obligated to.tell me. I owe you my life as it is." But at her last statement, he frowned.
"Transport?"

Silmeria nodded.''If we retrieve your lover you honestly think they would just let us be off? '' she asked calmly. ''Leaving by foot would be near impossible if things go wrong. We can go by flihjt of we must. Only, if we must.'' She stopped for a moment.  ''You do not get airsick do you?..'' she obvioysly hoped that she would not have to morph but if she had too, getting filth between her feathers was not something she prefered.

''Hmm I suppose it matters little would you get airsick though... also I do not feel offended or feel oblidged to tell you what kind of creature I am. I believe I said earlier people named me monster right? So I was suprised when you asked if I was a Fae. I am sorry I laughed though... it has been a while since I had done so. But would not mean to offend you with it either. I can teach you a bit about Fae folks, and various types of magic if you like.''

"Air sick?" Killian visibly blanched. "I.. I... I wouldn't know."

Fly? Was she serious? He swallowed the forming knot in his throat and absentmindedly felt at the nub where his arm had once been. But as she went on to talk about the fae, he stared at her with interest.

"Despite not being fae.. you do know some about them?" He looked her over. "And you do not have to worry about not trusting me with your secret. This world... it sometimes feels hard to trust anyone."

''I am suprised about myself to be honest. My trust has been broken more then once. In some ways more cruel then the other. But I have quite some knowledge about Fae. Magi. And several creatures. I read a lot about them. And interacted with them a lot as well during my life. Since it takes a while to reach this 'Grand Duke' I can teach you. If you do not mind I'd like to see your combat skills as well. Perhaps I can teach you a trick or two.''

Killian digested all of her offers, nodding his head but frowning at the last suggestion about fighting.
"I'm not sure I've got much will or desire to want to fight... After seeing all I've seen... This war is beyond me, and I want no more part of it. It's not helping Connlaoth, but tearing it apart."

''Well.. we live in a world where fighting is sometimes the only choice. Fighting does not have to mean kill or engage whenever you can. But it would be good if you can defend yourself. If you can not do that, you can not defend others either.'' she stopped to turn around and face him. ''I personally hate fighting as well. Killing even more. Sometimes it just has to be done. I killed more people. Innocent people. Then I'd like to admit to myself. Even though I was tricked into doing it. But I try to see the good in the people I encounter and defend them with the skills I have. Trust me. If you do not try, you will regret it at some point in your life.'' she paused for a moment.

''Walk beside me. It will be warmer for you.'' It were strange words coming from someone so scarcely clothed as she was for sure. But in this cold and her abilities maybe not as much of a bad offer.

Killian gave a numb nod and moved nearer. It would be strange, even the request, were he not already growing used to her natural magics. But as he did draw near and released a held breath, he winced a little. The tension and anxiety weighed heavily upon him and made his stomach twist into a tight not that even breathing seemed to hurt. But that pain was only cut off for a moment when he realized just what his female companion was wearing. And considering how close he was and his blue eyes had been down cast, well...
He was staring right at her chest.

His cheeks went pink as he tried to hurriedly look anywhere else, but in doing so, he nearly tripped over his own two feet and stumbled into her, barely catching himself on the bare skin of his shoulder and nearly knocking heads with her.

"Er.. s-sorry!" he said, his cheeks to ears all going red. "I.. I must still be .. be.. exhausted from the battle."

Or her breasts. He was still a man, and one who was a bit shy around women, and only now realizing what a beautiful companion he now had made his heart beat all the faster, and his heart ache for the one he had left behind.

''Are you alright? despite not having walked long we can rest a bit if you need it.''  She had not forgotten for a moment that he had lost his arm the night prior. Losing a limb could ask a lot from a person. The fact he had a battle before it too was not helping either.

She tended to be rather oblivious considering her clothes and how men would look at her. With one hand on his shoulder to support him, she gently placed her hand on his cheek before placing it on his forhead. Her touch, unlike her words was soft, warm and gentle. Almost as if she was touching something fragile.
''You at the least do not appear to have a fever... despite your red face.'' Oblivious or not she was not that stupid. But did not scold him. There was even a hint of a smile on her face. Perhaps when he slept she could turn into something else. But to avoid suspicion at some point she'd perhaps have to buy a new set of clothes in the first town they got in.

''Just a little bit further and we can rest if you like. To much in the open will not be good.''

Killian's blush grew fiercer. Nodding his head, he looked forward.
"Perhaps we should continue.. just a little longer. But yes... this type of travel... It is wearing on me more than I'd like." And he was anxious to get moving, but as she suspected- he had gone through a lot and it greatly hampered his ability more so than the snow.

''We could get a cart or horses if we find ourselves near a town. No need to worry about the expenses.'' Silmeria assured. She took a hold of his hand and started walking. Allowing her warm to slowly be taken in by Killian's blood so it could bring the warmth to the rest of his body properly.

It was not till about half an hour later till they stopped at what once had been what seemed a farmhouse. Despite in a far state of decay it was still safe enough to take refuge inside. Although Silmeria left Killian's side for a moment to make sure the building was indeed empty.

Instead of finding wood, Silmeria simply broke some planks from the inner walls and dumped them in the fireplace before heading to her bag taking flint and steel. It was not that anybody would see them but she would better get used to not using to much magic while being in Connlaoth of the present time.

''Are you hungry?'' she asked after having gotten the fire going. ''I still have some deer meat left. Red meats will do you most good.''

Killian helped where he could, but by now, the travel was taking it's toll on him and he was glad they found a spot to rest. As Silmeria set to work on a fire, Killian tried his best to help bring her more pieces of dry, rotting wood to use to fuel the fire. He didn't question why she did not use her magic, for he was too exhausted to consider it, but once the fire was going, he took a seat and closed his eyes.

But a moment later when she asked him about food, he opened them and stared at her for a while in silence. He felt so numb, so useless, so empty. He shook his head, finally answering her.
"No.. I couldn't eat. But rest... would it be alright if I rested?"
He desperately needed to sleep. Not only to regain his strength, but to help him forget.

''Rest all you need.'' Silmeria assured. ''and when you need'' Placing some more wood in the fireplace and relocated some planks in it. She then walked to her bag and took out the blanket again puting it over Killian gently. They had not walked very long. Four hours tops. But it was to be expected and she did not mind.

''I am going to take a look around. Perhaps there is something in here of use to us'' she did not expect to find much, this place seemed to have been empty for at least a year. and those whom lived here were most likely not the richest amongst people. But anything from an extra blanket till even discarded jewelery would be usefull. It was amazing how much things you could still find in places like these and she sought homes in worse conditions then this too.

She looked at Killian for a moment and headed outside first. The smoke that exited through the chimney would perhaps attract something or someone. Would that be the case she'd still have her swords and incineration. But the door and wooden floorboards cracked so if someone would be near she'd hear it.

Outside beneath a layer of snow and ice she found the entrance to the basement under some wooden doors. She scooped most of the snow away and melted the rest quickly along with the ice. Locked. Something that suprised her. It was unlikely no single other person had reached this place and searched it. Unless of course there was a way in from the inside too. Instead of burning the entrace open like how she would usually do she simply picked it with ease and opened the doors. ''Ugh... spiders...'' she muttered as she tore apart more spiderwebs then she'd care to count. It was dark below but nothing a simple flame could not solve. She summoned one at the bottem of the staircase and started heading down.

''To bad dust does not sell... at least not this kind...'' she muttered. Her steps were carefull on the old wood but she knew where to step and where not. A weak echo sounded through the basement as she reached the stone floor. There were many shelves. On a few things that maybe once was cheese. Sacks of now decayed wheat and bones of cattle hang there too where they'd once been put to dry. Whomever lived here must have had some hurry or had been killed.

After searching around a little more she found a a few small wine caskets and bottles of rum and whiskey. ''Could be worse.'' she thought to herself as she took it and put it in her bag. Despite its magic quantities though, it was limited. But there was enough space. She found some blankets too but they were filled with bugs and had decayed so far they were anything but usefull. Stuff in jars that had not been broken already throughout the time this place got abandoned were not filled with usefull things either.

She noticed another stairs that lead back into the house but first closed the outside basement door before heading back in through there. Noticing the door ended up in the kitchen after she entered it and closed it. Pondered for a brief moment and locked it. She ddi not scavenge further however. Instead she went to check up on Killian. So far the place seemed undisturbed other then their interference.

And when she'd find Killian, he too, was undisturbed, his body slumped forward like a wilted flower as he breathed softly from sleep. And as he lay there, his other hand was resting across his chest and resting over where his other arm had once been. And though sleep was often peaceful, Killian looked anything but, and probably seemed years beyond his age in that moment.

However, as the lock door suggested, someone had to have secured it-
and the lack of cobwebs in a few locations might have given it away when Silmeria was checking out the area. However, there was, for the moment, no signs of an intruder...

Though from an unseen perch they were being watched as this unknown person bided their time.

Silmeria observed Killian for a moment. He seemed a little like a lost puppy and she was not really sure what to do with him. Comfort him? Or let him be. She looked through the dusty windows. For as far as possible anyway and sighed deeply. She did not nessesarily hated humans. But she did find herself a fool to try and trust one again. It rarely had turned out well the previous times. She looked at Killian again and walked towards him. After sitting down she gently placed his head on her lap. Not really daring yet to trust people or not. He had been through so much in a short period of time. At the least he would not have to face it alone for now.

As she sat there, Silmeria's own eyes closed slowly as she started to doze off. Not completely sleeping though as she let one hand rest on Killian's head and the other on her sword she had placed beside her just in case.

And it would be sometime before anything would stir. And to the one moving in the shadows, it appeared the two before them was none the wiser. So quickly they moved forward, silent as the dead, but one wrong step had a floor board creaking, and when Killian's eyes fluttered open, it took him a second in his groggy state, to realize just what was going on.

And it was an instinct how he reacted, jerking up suddenly when the glint of a blade came their way. And a crazed woman looked at the pair, having to be in her late forties or fifties, with ragged hair and clothes, and was dirty from head to toe. And though she held a knife, she did not strike them but held it in their direction with a growl.

Killian was now fully erect, placing his seated form between this strange woman and Silmeria.

"Soldier.."s he hissed, unable to take her crazed, feral look off of Killian. "Soldier of hell you are! How dare you come to my place of sanctuary." And before Killian knew what was going on, the woman came at them-a nd Killian did hte only thing he could- and threw out his only remaining limb towards the strike to take the brunt of it while protecting Silmeria from any harm. And the knife first clinked after his armored shoulder, making the woman hiss before she was after them again, and this time her knife cut deeply into his cheek.

Silmeria got started too when she heard the floorboard cracking and got on her feet. The fire in the fireplace reacted somewhat more fiercely too. She could not prevent the knife from cutting Killian's cheek but at the least could prevent the woman from striking again. ''Attacking people as they rest. Is not very nice.'' she said firmly and in a blink of an eye got behind the woman, grabing her wrists as she attempted to stab Killian again and twisted it but gently enough so it would not break causing the dagger to fall on the ground. She wondered if the woman lived here. But when she and Killian entered there were no footprints in the dust or recent wood in the fireplace. She put the thought out of her head as she gently placed her foot against the back of the woman's knees which would force her down.

''How about taking things easy for a bit before lashing at someone'' she looked at Killian after she spoke. The wound looked nasty and the blade did not look to clean. ''Killian... my bag... open it, think of a leather potion pouch, and put your hand in. Take it out and put a dropet or two on the cut please.''

She looked at the woman again. ''Now. Could you tell me why you'd suddenly lash out so him?'' she had heard the woman say Soldier in a rather descpicable way so that might be it. Perhaps she was a victim of this war.

The woman was ragged and feral as she bared her teeth defiantly at them both.
"Because all soldiers are the devil! All soldiers should return to hell!"

''Alright. What if I told you we killed a soldier and stole it's armor?'' Silmeria asked. She was good at lying and bluffing and summened a few flame butterflies in front of the woman. ''What else would a mage like me doing with him?'' the butterflies vanished as soon as they had come but she surely did not let the woman go just yet. ''Condemning them all to hell also would be harsch. Understandable too for many. But it is also unfair to wish them all to hell. I am sure that there are some kindhearted amongst them too who either have been misguided or forced into being a soldier.''

Wether talking like this was futile or not Silmeria did not know. Hatred could seep deep into a persons heart. And leave a wound so deep nothing could heal it. She could smell something foul too. A sickness of some sort perhaps. Judging by how the woman's condition was it would not suprise her if she was.

The woman still fought against Sil's hold, even after the display of magic, which only halted the woman's thrashing momentarily. Still baring her teeth, she continued to try to pull her arm free.

"You condemn us all with such speech! What do you know of magic? I see things," the woman growled, eyes flaring with madness. "The future works against us. So many will die. So many will fall."

Rather then speaking up loudly she closed in on the woman. ''I have been living for 1400 years... give or take a few. I know my fair share of magic, and creatures posessing it. So tell me Seer...'' with her phoenix strength Silmeria had no trouble keeping the woman where she was. Heck she could do it all day. ''If you are a Seer you know what I am if you focus on me a little. I condemn? I have been and most likely will do more. But lay a hand on my companion, and you know very well what I will do. The future is never written. It has so many ways of how it can turn out you can fill a country sized library stacked from the deepest pits to the highest skies. It all depends on the chances given to people. Even the smallest kind gestures can make things turn so differently. I am sure you have seen your fair share of pain and suffering. But so has he. I like to give thisone the benefit of the doubt.'' She sighed deeply. ''But hatred blinds. Doesn't it.''

Focus? Ha! She didn't need the invitation as her eyes glared at her like two poisonous orbs radiating venom. But what she saw from Sil made her jerk back, despite the grip.

"Through you there is only death.. flames... rebirth..." She shook her head, trying to shake away the flames in her vision before turning to the soft voice of the man beside her.

"Please... she only speaks the truth. I am not here to harm you..."

But as the woman studied Killian's blue eyes, she only bore her teeth.
"You say this but you willingly joined the Grand Duke's army."

Killian was taken back how she could have known this, but tried not to let it unsettle him.

"Yes. It was by choice. But then.... I was naive."

"Ha!" the woman could have spat on him. "Naivety will not save your soul... besides.." And as she studied him, another vision swam into her mind and she gave a cruel, yet somewhat twistedly sympahetic smile.
"The one you fight for... this woman of magic, she is the Grand Duke's now. And will be caught up in his corruption, and his bed."

Startled, and angered by such news, Killian found his blood heating as he bared his teeth.
"You... you don't know what you're talking about!"

And the woman scoffed.
"I only tell thigns as I see it. And you? You will lose more than your arm in this war."

And Killian's stomach drop at such words, at the way the woman looked at him. He had a feeling he knew what he'd lose next-
especially if the news she just told him..
If it were true...
If Solita were to become lost to him. And it was too much to bear, he felt ill and turned away, repeating,


"You've gone crazy, mad from the war. You know not what you speak."

And the woman only gave a hollow laugh.
"None can deny my visions. I predicted the war, and I can see the ending. Reajh will fall, more cities will burn, and Connlaothian duchies will split. This war..." she hissed. "It will only get worse."

''Then I shall ask you this Seer. If you can see what has yet come to pass then you can look for multiple futures too. Or have you fallen so deeply in despair that you forgot how to do so. Or perhaps. You do not want to look for a future in which it will not occur.''

She wondered though if the woman's words were true, Killian's lover would be in that bed willingly or not. She said will be. Meaning that there was still time. But with the speed they traveled now? She gritted her teeth. She said so herself. The smallest of chances. Or even the faintest glint of light could change a person's life and change anything. But she wondered if she could give Killian this chance too.

Killian's heart gripped at what reality this woman put before him, but turning away, he gave a shake of his head.
"Futile or not... my purpose in this war is to help her now..." and his fist clenched tightly at his side, shaking as he tried to repress any bubbling rage.
"Her... and the others who have been so wronged. I..." And he swallowed the dry lump that had formed in his throat and blinked back a few threatening tears from his blue eyes. "I am a soldier for them now, even if it condemns me. I have seen too many horrors now to simply ignore."
And he turned to the strange, mad woman with tears now streaming down his cheeks.

"You speak such words, but fate is written. You too, will try to turn away from your torment with another, but the future is always bleak. And the coldness... it is endless. No one will be unscathed."

''Life is harsh. But getting through it is what makes it matter. Making mistakes. Learning from them.'' she took a deep breath. ''Now. Look for a future in which the outcome is the least gruesome and tell us. What has to be done. If you have nothing to say we will take our leave.'' she wondered if she could let the woman be like this or not.

It was only then did the crazed woman drop her weapon, the metal clattering to the ground. Her eyes were still wide, anxious, but eventually her lips curled into something cold and hollow.
"Connlaoth bares no path that isn't gruesome. All sides will fall."

''Surely someone sees things half empty...'' Silmeria muttered and moved the weapon away. ''Killian... take one of those vials like I said before. We should go.'' Silmeria said. Still not letting go of the woman. Indeed. Would they fly they'd be there in a few days tops. But the thought of Killian, despite they were not exactly friends yet, fearing her true form still frightened her. ''People forge their own future. I knew a Seer once. He was powerful and the visions at some point wrecked his body. But if he saw something gruesome, he always found a way to let the outcome be something else. But he still had hope for the world. No matter how many wars there had been and were yet to come. Killing the current grand duke may most likely not solve it. But you. Who only sees the bad things. It is because you want it to be. After all. If Connlaoth falls further into despair, they suffer. From civilian to mordecai. Everyone who never helped you. And seeing their suffering is exactly what you want. Or am I wrong.'' she took a deep breath before slowly letting the woman go. ''I will show you something when times comes, then even you can not forsee.''

Silmeria got on her feet and looked at Killian. ''There are a few options.'' she said eventually. her throat a little bit dry. If what she said is accurate considering your lover who will lose to the Grand Duke's corruption... it means we still have time since it had not happened yet. In theory... we can make it there in a matter of days if I would do something that I normally wouldn't. But it depends on a few things. It would be a grab and go mission instead. I can fight well enough to defend more then one person and getting them out of harms way to safety. The other option is walking like we'd initially do and hopefully lady Seer here was wrong. Your choice.''

All was quiet as a strange sensation became him. He realized the path before him was torn. And though the winds blew harshly, he did not grimace at it, but the decision at hand. But at the next words from the lady Seer, Killian truly knew not what to say.

"Lovers come and lovers fall. You should worry about your own kind..." And she looked from Killian to Silmeria.
"Or is it that you love him already? Is that why you protect him, mage? Do you know your fate? That it will be your hearts bound together, thAT HE is to be your love?" And she looked at Sil, a disgusted curl to her lips.

''If he is to be then so be it. I surely do not need your approval'' she said noting the look of disgust on the woman's face. ''As for my own kind? I have never seen another. I am not saying I am the last. It is just a big world.'' Silmeria replied.

''As for why I protect him. Why not. Surely protecting others. Giving them the benefit of the doubt, or trusting them have severely hurt me more often then not. But those few times my feelings and trust was not betrayed? It was worth it. Otherwise I would not keep trying. I just want to find those few people whom are worth saving and protecting. And perhaps even loving when I can live with what happened last time I did so.'' she grabbed her bag and fetched the pouch out herself since Killian still hadn't and applied a few drops of the healing tears on his cut before closing the vial and rolled it to the woman. It had one drop left. ''You smell like disease. Either use it or don't.'' her gaze went to Killian. ''It is your choice. We can go by foot... or we take the fast route. With the latter I will need one day of rest in a safe haven. If you fear me I will just have to live with it till we have saved your lover.''

Once free of Silmeria's grip, the crazed seer stood there for a moment and looked at the offered vial. Though for a time, she did not move, her head tilting to one side before she dared touch the vial. But once it was in her hands, her lips curled back as she hissed and hurled the bottle at Silmeria. And it was right when Killian was about to reply to Sil, for his tongue had been dry of words as he tried to let all of this nonsense sink in, or rather, attempt to let some of it roll off his shoulders.

But to see the vial coming towards them, he once again stepped in the way, and the vial cracked harmlessly off his armor as Killian glared towards the woman. And to see her plan so easily thwarted, she rushed towards Killian again. Even without a weapon, she was unrelenting. Killian did all he could, catching her by the wrist and holding her in place as best he could.

"Calm yourself! We are not enemies!" Killian said, trying to reason with her. "Please stop this at once before you hurt yourself!"

"Hurt myself? Hurt myself!?" the woman shrieked. She was in hysterics, and simply laughed and yowled as she tried to fight through Killian's grip. But the grip only tightened.

"Please restrain yourself!" But before Killian knew what was going on, the mad woman bit him, and one of her hands came free and she clawed at his face before breaking from his grip and coming after the soldier again.

Despite his wound, he still had the training of a soldier, and awkwardly caught the woman again as she came forth, and once again he pleased, "Please calm down! We've already proved we mean you no harm!"

But that's when the warm slap of spit hit his face as the woman growled at him.

"You have proved nothing but being my enemy! You will die! You will all die! You and all of your lovers!"

''You've had your chance then Seer.'' With a powerfull grab she pulled the woman away from Killian and forced her against the wall. ''To bad there are always those who shove away life as it is offered to them. I was planning on sparing you but I suppose once more my desire of keeping people alive got the better of me. May your afterlife be more blissfull then the one you lived in.'' Silmeria said. She still had her swords at her waist and drew one of them with her free hand. If they were metal it must have been the lightest colored kind. Glinstering in the little bit of light that got through the dusty windows.

Before the woman would recover from Silmeria grabbing her and would strike again she stabbed the woman swiftly with the blade. A clean strike to the womans heart so she at the least would die instantly. Despite somewhere Silmeria did the woman a favor on multiple grounds she did not feel like it.

Silmeria pulled out the sword. Gently holding the woman against the wall. Some of the blood got on her white clothes but she did not seem to notice or care as she gently let the woman down. Muttering a kind of prayer before she just went silent and wiped some tears from her eyes before facing Killian again.

Her look was different. Usually it was firm. Almost harsh. And perhaps she spoke and thought lightly and quickly when she had to kill but she did not seemed to be lying having told Killian before that she hated it.

Silmeria closed the lifeless eyes of the woman and took a few deep shivering breaths as she pulled herself together. ''...We should go...'' she said eventually with a small voice as she got on her feet and casted another look on the woman.

Killian's injuries and other potentional dangers they brought faded away quickly with Silmeria's tears still in his system. ''I will leave the choice to you wether you want to walk... or the quicker way.''

Killian wasn't innocent of witnessing death, but that did not mean he was unaffected. And the moment he saw her go to kill her, he tried to protest, but his voice was caught half way between his throat and lips and he could only watch in horror as the sword skewered the woman and she dropped away, lifeless to the ground.

Killian's eyes trembled, as did his lips, as he stared from the freshly fallen corpse over to Silmeria. And his eyes burned, as did his blood, but as he felt himself glare at Silmeria, he instantly softened the moment he saw the way she looked after the fact.

And then, he too sighed and felt the grief of the moment.

"This would have happened to her, one way or another. Those... like her tend not to survive very long, especially wtih an army ready to kill anything that even so much as looks rabid.. or magical."

His eyes were still glued to the dead body before he turned to Silmeria after she asked his last question. And he felt too heavy, too tired to want to do either of those options. BUt somehow, the guilt that clung heavily to his gut like a stone made him reply, "Let's walk."

It would do good for his conscience to get this feeling out of him through the coldness and the fresh air.

''She was carrying a sort of illness as well. Who knows how many she had infected already and how many more would follow.'' she took a deep breath and with a powerfull slash of the blade in the air, the blood that had lingered on the blade ended up on the floor. Silmeria put the clean blade away. ''I will prepare a funeral pyre... burrying her will only bring more infection when the winter is over.''

It was done fairy quickly since she used the doors from the basement as well as dried flowers and herbs along with a bed of old dried hay on which she gently placed the lady. As she placed more herbs and flowers around the woman and in her hands Silmeria spoke an ancient, long forgotten prayer but other then that, was silent.

With the flint and steel she made some sparks on the dead dry material that quickly got flame and engulfed the woman quickly.

It was not actually until then she noticed the blood on her clothes. The fire was burning well even without her help. ''Give me a moment. I need to change into something less bloody...'' she entered the house again and pulled out some other clothes from her bag. Although they were in the same color and style as her other set. After changing though she could not help but slamming her fist a few times against the wall before joining Killian again, wearing some black boots till about her knees, and white silken dress with black lace and thin belts. Above it was a sort of cloak. One arm and shoulder was exposed while the other was hidden beneath the white fabric.

''If you say walking, we walk... but if she said was true about Solita... are you sure you do not want the quicker way?... You can change your mind at any time.''

Killian was quiet as he watched the seer's corpse burn. It was strange thing to watch, to see the fire turn a body into nothing but black dust. But the fire was warm from the pyre and no less inviting than any other. But still, to stare at the end of someone's life so clearly...

It did more than trouble him as he remained quiet and searching.

He barely registered Silmeria had gone to change her clothing, but when she returned, Killian said not a word, staring at the snow where the blood remained the only evidence the woman who burned had once ever lived. And the longer he stared at the snow, the deeper the blood got buried.

After a few silent minutes Silmeria took a deep breath. ''We should move.'' she said eventually, Her voice was soft. Instead of taking a hold of his hand she offered it to Killian like before so she could use her warmth to keep him warm. It was not the one she killed the woman with but she could imagine Killian did not want to hold the hand she had just killed a person with.

Not sure of his own strength to even move, he silently obeyed. But he didn't feel weak enough to take her hand. Perhaps it was out of fear of what happened, or even the uncertainty of their fate, but Killian wanted to feel the chilling bite of the winds, to numb him in another way but this.

Realising he would not be taking her hand now she let her arm rest beside her.''Just let me know when you are cold or feel fatigued. Supposedly there can be a village not to far from here. Perhaps a travel of a day or five at our speed. It was a rather big farm so they had to sell their crops somewhere.''

She turned around and started walking. Some silent tears running over her cheeks. She killed again and wasnt even on solid ground for a whole day. Death. Flames. Rebirth. She wondered when or of Killian would link those spoken words with her firemagic and would conclude what she was.

It was perhaps lucky for Silmeria he was not trained or knowledgeable of all the mythological magical creatures that were actually real. But in this war, the line of reality was always clouded, and he simply nodded and fell into a quiet, somber walk.

It wasn't until several hours of walking that Killian said or did anything. Though even that was debatable, for his action at the moment, was that he simply stopped.

No longer hearing his footsteps in the snow behind her Silmeria turned around.''Are you alright?'' She could see he was tired. Either that or it was one of those confession looks of someone whom had been thinking of something awfull for a while.

''We can rest if you want.'' She suggested. Him eating something would not be a bad idea either

It was only then Killian shook his head and dare break his own silence.
"I can't do it, Silmeria. I feel a fool. And in this waste land of snow, ice... all that I can see is death and despair."
His lips trembled as tears began to pool within his eyes.

"And no, I can not blame such thoughts on the Seer... she..." And he had to look away, blinking back tears. "She was right in some regards. And now.." he swallowed the knot that threatened to seal his throat shut before loweirng his head in shame.
"She is right I could lose her, but not only my love... but myself. I... I don't even feel as if I'm myself anymore. All that's happen, all that's lost... What good does any of this do? And to stumble upon you? To find someone to save me with magic when I've been trained to do nothing but kill your kind?"

At this, he raised his teary eyes to her and gave another grave shake of his head.

"Silmeria... if we find another town, we... we should part ways."

If not for her sake, but for his. He just couldn't handle any of this right now, and felt as if his life were spiraling down into a bottomless pit of despair.

'Solita... forgive me.'
But he knew he was hardly fit to be any sort of savior, or any sort of lover, a future for her now. She deserved better....
And if she were to fall into the Grand Duke's clutches...

Wouldn't her life be all the better in such luxury?

Silmeria looked at Killian fpr a moment before looking around and made a fire after being sure nobody was there. ''Sit.'' If it wasnt for the compassion in her tone it would have sounded like an order.

She filled a pan with snow and herbs and pyt it on the fire. ''I will tell you a bit about myself.'' She took a deep breath. ''A long time ago I was found by a lird named Rhendak. I was suffering from temporarily amnesia and when the horrors of my past reached me again, Rhendak said he was working on peace. Since he was friendly and seemed respected I believed him. And soon served him as head general. Often we'd march out to take down oppression and enemies of the peace. This lasted for decades. Then centuries.''

She paused, pouring the hot herbal drink in cups and gave Killian one.

''At one time, I received an order to kill someone. An example was to be made and his family was to be taken care off too. With one more soldier I went to where this so called leader of the opression was and dragged him outside. The fellow soldier had the wife and five children from age newborn till 10. They were harmless but the soldier said the family too and to set an example he would rape the wife and oldest daughter before killing them and then the husband. I said i could not alliw them. They were harmless. And he said, orders are orders. And thst as a bonus every family had to give up a girl aged 12 till 25 for the soldiers pleasures. As he forced the wife on the ground i released the man and killed the soldier. And apolagised for his actions. And that I would mention it at the lird. They told me that because of me they were still oppressed and exploited. That for generations Rhendaks house had been making wars and insane demands. I did not believe them at first and investigated. When I realised I had been used and lied too, i felt sick. Betrayed...''

She paused again. '' I returned to them and said that I could never attone for what I did. But I promused them Rhenfaks house would fall that week. I rallied every soldier. Said we would finish it once and for all. And I did. After killing his father, sons and wives I found my master in his study. He spoke about me and how close he was to be always there in history because he had me. I killed him before guards could warn him. After they fired the canons and launched spells at me, I destroyed the army to the last man. And wiped them as good as out of history. I could not attone for what I did but I freed the rest.'' She finished her drink. ''My point is, you may be list now. But you can still find yourself. Besides you are not rid of me that easily.  You promised me something. Also who says Solita is ending up in that bed willingly. If you wont find out I will. On my own if I must.''

The moment by the fire side was sobering, but even still, her depressing tale did nothing to sooth his own. And though she offered him a drink, and he was thirsty, he did not drink as his blue eyes studied her.

"Silmeria... you should not get yourself involved in this war."

''I got myself involved the moment I met you.''she said calmly

''When I realised that I had served the wrong side for those hundreds of yearrs I was torn. Lost just like you are now. But I found myself back. Look... Killian you can not change what you did. And I admit that living with it is not easy until you gave it a place somewhere. Denial never works, that only eats you up. But the future? It is not written for us like some script to follow. The Seer I once knew, he and I would, if the vision provided bad news, we would actually change that future. And we succeeded many times. Trust me on that. And no it did not turn out worse.''

She poured herself another cup before suggestion to Killian to drink his. ''It will keep you warm. Unless you want to be warmed up by my true form again. I put some fire root in that drink. It works a bit the same as my magic on you. Providing warmth until it is out of your system.''

''After a pause, Silmeria exhaled calmly. ''It is my world too Killian. Have I done nothing not long enough already? I know I am capable of doing a lot for the magic side. If you want us to part ways then fine and I will get Solita and all those other mages out myself. Those who want too anyway. Magic is a part of this world Killian. People are born with it for a reason wether they want too or not. The Seer did not really had good news for me too. Death. Fire. Rebirth. Whenever it happens, it will happen. But I can not let you drown and lose yourself in your own misery and fears about things you can lose. If you do nothing? You will lose them regardless. Been there, done that.''

Killian grew quiet. Her words did not settle him, in fact, it only added to his guilt. And that much was evident in his sad blue eyes as he looked up at her.

"But you owe me nothing... those suffering, nothing."

He sighed and looked back down at the drink, but his throat was too tight, he too anxious, to even think about taking a sip. And thinking back to being warm... he raked a hand through his hair. He felt cold, but warm at the same time, and had no idea he had been growing a fever this whole time. But he shook his head, refusing the idea of warmth.

"No... I think the cold is doing at least some good. I just feel so tired, but the chill, it seems to be keeping me awake."
His voice came out tired, flat.... and his frown continued to deepen as he looked at the snow that was leisurely following before them.

"We should keep moving," he said after a time. There was no use anymore to just linger there in the snow, and he no longer could sit still anyway. He was too tense and the anxiety- intense.

((Hope you do not mind me fastforwarding a little ))

''Just do not be embarrased when I need to carry you then.'' Silmeria muttered. The fire dying with just a mere wave of her hand before getting on her feet.

''I may not owe anyone anything. But that does not mean I will do nothing.''

She was not sure how much or long they had walked but she had eventually closed in on him to make sure he would not succumb to the cold. At least, till the point she heard him collapse in the snow.

''Damnit..'' she muttered turning around, kneeling beside him. It was dusk and the sky black and threatning with terrible weather.
''Killian we can not stay here..'' she said as she attempted to urge him to go further. It was not till then she noticed he had a fever. And a bad one too. ''Damnit!'' she cursed. She had no medicine on her and carrying him to a potentional outpost would take to long. She dropped her bag and quickly blindfolded him before placing him on her back but she did not carry him. Instead, she morphed in her other form and grabbed her bag with her talons before taking off. She did not fly quick or to rough and made sure he remained still and in one place. From the sky she was capable of seeing better too and noticed light in the far distance. A town. Her guesses had not been wrong.

She landed outside of it when the darkness had quickly fallen. There would be a second problem. Him being a soldier could cause trouble. ''Sorry Killian...'' she muttered. As she swiftly stripped him of his armor and anything that prove he was a soldier before putting him in a set of luxery man's clothes. She dumped his armor quickly in her bag and picked him up. Walking as fast as she could to the town. First was finding an inn and then a physician. If there was one.

OOC: The fast forwarding is fine :)
I did a little bit too, presuming they're now in an inn/ or tavern room

---

The fever had only gotten worse the more he ignored it, and soon his head was swimming, as was the world. And before he knew it, he fell over,t he fever getting the better of him, and he would not awaken until they had reached the town.

The town was quite small, the inn having just one room available and even that room hard barely enough room for two people to be accommodated easily. But the small bed was better than nothing, despite it's mattress being almost limp and the pillow- non existent.

It was only when he was in this room, and a fire was going did Killian stir. But it was hard to tell if he was awake, or if he was just mumbling nothings triggered by his fever.

''Get lower damnit!''Silmeria cursed. It was no bloodpoisoning or poison at all. Perhaps the shock of everything. She had been trying to get the fever down by wrapping ice and snow in cloth to put on his wrists, in his neck, behind the ears and on Killians head. As final, on his feet to get the body to cool off.

''I did not give you my precious tears to waste away you...'' she let out a cry of frustration. The contends of her bag were all over. Including the stuff she lifted from the farmhouse. There were clothes. Weapons. Priceless artifacts from ancient times and books. But since it was no illness, she was not sure how to fix it other then the obvious way in form of a bloodcontract.''No damn way I resort to that. Don't make me..'' Silmeria muttered as she was looking through bottles of potions in the hope there was something that could lower Killians fever but there was nothing.

After taking a deep breath she got on her feet and headed to where Killian lay. Removing the cloth on his head, removed the sweat, washed it and put it back on his head after putting some new ice into it.''Why do I have to be a creature of fire..'' she looked at him fir a bit. A thought had occured to her. Was it a kind of fever caused by inner mind battles? She was not sure. Nobody was crazy enough to go to the herbalist either in this weather. Someone offered to look in his basement but she doubted he would be back. At the least though the inn had a room left.

It wasn't until the next morning that his fever broke, and Killian exhaustedly opened his eyes. For a time, he stared blankly at the ceiling before moving to rise and realizing, as the blanket fell off his form- he was nearly naked and at that realization, he lost his balance and fell clean off the bed!

Ooc: hope its okay to presume she would have basically stripped him to try to get the fever down lol. The idea amuses.me greatly :l

OoC: Yea she would've stripped him. Certainly he is wearing undies that are not his own (although they are nice, comfy nobility wear...)

Silmeria was not in the room but the noise did made someone rush in. A maid of the inn. She looked tired but relived seeing Killian is awake. ''Good to see you awake sir. You had a hell of a fever... you are... lucky to actually be alive. The girl is brought to a spare bed. She collapsed from exhaustion a few hours ago.''

It was after hearing about Silmeria's condition that Killian stood up suddenly.
"Silmeria?" But a wave of dizziness became him as he held onto his head, and a nearby table,t o keep himself from falling over. And when he had stood up, anything keeping his decent fell down, leaving Killian in fancy underpants that made the  maid gasp and turn around.

Killian's face turned equally as red, but he hadn't time to consider propriety as he asked her.

"Her room.. please show me to her room."

''Please... Sir... put on some clothes first. Your Maid put then on the chair.'' she said and gestured to the stool near the bed where a set of silken and wool winter clothes were neatly folded upon.

''A brave Maid she is too. I had not meant to pry but she said you two were ambushed but continued the road anyway and carried you after you collapsed due to the fever. She pulled many stings and had to pay the physician royally just to see you were going to be better. She must have been exhausted though since she collapsed right after hearing you would be fine. Felt really warm too but do not worry, she has no favor.'' whatever this girl was she certainly sounded exited. Almost starstruck. Whatever Silmeria had said, would perhaps be something for Killian to find out later.

She waited for Killian to get dressed until she lead him to a room at the end of the hall. ''She... actually did not want anyone disturbing her but I am sure she'll be delighted to see you are alright. You are her master after all.'' she gave Killian the key to the room before giving him a polite bow. ''I will make sure that you will get something to eat. Your Maid asked if we could look after you after all till she was capable of doing so again.'' she said and left. Joining with a few of her fellow maids for most likely some giggling and gossiping.

--

Silmeria was sleeping in the bed completely curled up. Breathing calmly and certainly the maid from before had forgotten to mention that Sil was wearing nothing more then a thin nightgown, curled up till her thighs from most likely moving a lot in her sleep.

Killian, feeling a fool, was quick to get dressed in whatever he was offered, but even as he smoothed down the clothes, he couldn't help himself but stop to stare at the fine silk he was given. These were his clothes? Not having time to question it, he was quick to follow the woman down the hall, but at the mention of him being a master.

"Master?" But any thoughts on the matter were vanquished when he saw Silmeria was okay, sleeping peacefully in another room. He drew in a careful breath, taking a step inside, and was surprised at how warm the room felt. He was glad he hadn't fully buttoned up his shirt, and slowly made his way over to her bed, not thinking to close the door behind him.

As Killian approached, Silmeria turned around in her sleep now with her face in Killians direction. But also her breasts slightly visable through the fabric of her gown but also because of the way she lay they were rather... expressed.

Her expression betrayed her dreams however as her lips moved and her cheeks were wet with tears. Normal ones fortunatly though.

None of her words made sense. Being spoken in a way different language. Until she suddenly tensed up.''I do not know any others like me... please stop... it hurts'' her voice almost seemed broken but with the next squeel and her body tesing up a large flame filled the fireplace for a brief moment.

Seeing her in such distress as she slept had Killian immediately sitting by her side.
"Silmeria.." he spoke softly, a hand gently resting on her shoulder. "Silmeria... you're dreaming." And seeing her tears, he froze. But after a moment, he pressed. "Please.. Silmeria..."
Seeing her tears and discomfort when she should have been peacefully at sleep had him worried and did not think his concern would turn into more giggles and gossip down the hallway as the maids lingered at the end of the hall.

It was not until a few minutes later that she awoke with a jolt, heavily breathing and a few more tears falling down her cheeks. It took her a moment too to realise where she was and who was with her but not before she seemed to check her arms lfor things that werent there which made her relieved.

''Killian... you're alright'' she seemed and sounded relieved and her body trembled a bit but she seemed alright

Killian nodded, and gave her a small smile.
"Yes, and the maids told me it was all thanks to you." But as he examined her wet face, he had to ask, "Are you alright? While you were sleeping..... you seemed restless."
And he didn't know if it was right to point out her tears.

Quickly Silmeria rubbed the tears from her face with her arm and chuckled. ''I just relived a time of torture. I will be fine. Just old experiences.'' she sighed deeply. ''My life it has not exactly been rosescented. I have been around for aproxematly 1400 years now. And being what I am and who I am kind off... leaves marks.'' she lifted her face to look at him. ''That is why... I am sometimes harsh or even to harsh to you or anybody really...''

She placed her hand on his cheek and then his forhead. ''Good. Your fever is gone. Means that the medicine worked.'' she seemed happy and relieved.
''Although I do admit, a part of me wants to punch you for not telling me in what kind of shape you were. I will let you off the hook thistime.'' she smiled but despite she meant that smile, it was not difficult to see she wanted to cry more then she had just did.

"Torture?" Killian's eyes filled with concern. And as he frowned and listened to her explanation, he moved a hand to produced a kerchief he felt in his breast pocket, and offered it to her. It was silk, and fancier than anything he had ever touched, and he had to wonder where this all came from. But there would be a time and place to question all that. For now, his concern was on Silmeria.

When she moved to feel his head, he smiled at her then.
"Yes, thanks to you. I.." And he lowered his gaze at her anger towards him. "I am sorry I did not express how ill Iwas. I... felt ill and out of sorts. So I was not being wise, nor myself."

Lifting his gaze, he saw that tears threatened to fall and he found himself having to ask, "I don't know how I'd feel to ever have lived as long as you, Silmeria. Most humans are lucky to live to fifty, let alone sixty years." He sighed, but kept his smile small. "And you do not need to apologize to me. A lesser person, fae or other wise, would never do half of what you have done for me." And his smile grew a little. "Though I probably would deserve a punch. I apologize. I didn't mean to scare nor burden you further."

Silmeria took the kerchief and used it to wipe the final tears away.''It's forgiven.'' She assured him and got on her feet. The inn maids giggles fading more to the background when she clised the door.

''You may have realised that they think I am your maid. I think it is best to keep it that way. The clothes you are wearing belonged to the last person I had a contract with. After you collapsed I figured it would be a good idea to change you to prevent trouble.''

She paused while she walked to the bed to sit down again.''You were in some kind of shock. Most of the medicine appearantly goes to the armies but they had enough to spare. Some herbalist gave me a mixture and said you would be fine if I would feed it to you. But it was worth it. Seeing you awake and well proves that. As for me... I was just tired. Nightmares are not uncommon for me which is why I had requested not to be disturbed. It gives away I am a being of magic after all. So. Master. Despite the innmaids most likely think we are runaway lovers at the least with their wild imaginations, what will we do now. Still want to split ways? Want to reclaim Solita? Either way we both need to rest anyway.''

Killian nodded as he listened to her story. And shook his head at his clothing.
"I'm not sure I am a very convincing rich man, but either way, I am indebted to you." And with a small smile, he added. "You should have made me the maid."

And this elicited a small blush at the idea, but at her reveal the servants at the inn thought they were lovers, his face went beet red.
"L-lovers!?" he exclaimed, heart thumping wildly at the idea. And he couldn't help it when his eyes went to Silmeria's body before shamefully turning away. By Angsar's name- it was so wrong of him to stare! And even dream! He professed himself to Solita. And he knew his feelings for her to be true, so when she was mentioned, she grit his teeth and continued to look at the floor.

"Yes... rest..." Killian went on with a sigh as he raked a hand through his hair. He nodded over to Sil. "Let's sleep. Get fed, and then figure out a game plan later."
He was too flustered to think, now!

Silmeria nodded.''I am kind of afraid to sleep by myself right now. When I feel like sleeping again would you mind if I join in the same room as you? If you do not want to thats alright then I will just stock up and sleep someother time'' there was a faint blush on her cheeks. Embarresment? Was most likely right since she was not used to admit she was scared.

Killian could only be sympathetic to her needs.
"Of course you can," he whispered. "If you want, you don't have to move. I could stay here, if you'd like."

Silmeria shook her head.''you need your sleep more then I do and I am still a bit... anxious from my nightmare. It will take a while until I can fall asleep again'' She admitted before getting on her feet and released her hair from the ribbon that was in it.

''I will try to get you a new set of clothes. Not that this looks bad on you but... the memory of the one whom they originated from... hurts a bit. But do not take them off until I have something else. They think you are my master so in their eyes you are nobility''

Killian was taken back, and as things fell into place, he frowned at the idea...
Did she kill for these clothes? These clothes.. now tainted in blood...
And he stared at them until his blue eyes drifted down to where his left arm had once been.
And there- there was a ghost of the war where other blood had been shed.

When would this cycle end?

Killian shook his head.
"I'll stay with you. I know how horrible it feels to be anxious.. to worry so much and have your dreams eat away at you."
And he moved a hand to brush some of her hair from her face. "And don't worry about the clothes. We can deal with that later... together."

Silmeria's closed her eyes at the touch and nodded at the suggestion.''Very well.'' She said before opening her wyes again.

''The clothes... belonged to someone I loved. Perhaps despite his action, still love and I thought he loved me too. He and I had a magic contract. But all of a sudden, he wanted to sell me to slavers. I... fled away and had not shown up till over 400 years later.''

Killian was shocked to what she revealed. Someone she loved? They could simply sell her to slavers? Suddenly missing Solita, feeling as if he were just as guilty as Sil's lover, he found his arm go around her and pulled her against him in an embrace.

''K-Killian...'' she was suprised by this. Not having been held like this for ages and suddenly being close enough to feel another persons warmth nearly frightebed her. But inside she felt scared. Had she not promised herself never to get close to anyone again like this after what Erian did to her? Did she not promise herself to never reveal her weaknesses ever again? So much for promises.

Her arms were stilk beside her bidy but her head rested on Killians shoulder before she realised her body was trembling and that she was crying. It had nit mattered how many years she spent soaring the highest skies. It seemed for now the past certainly had caught up with her

At her trembling, he only tightened that arm around her. He kept her close, so close she'd be able to feel his warmth shared with hers, and the scent of his skin beneath the silks.
"Don't be sad or afraid, Silmeria. You're one of the strongest women I've ever met," he whispered to her, stroking a hand through her hair.
"We all have nightmares, even ones we have to live with in the day. But nightmares are not who we are." And he paused his stroking of her hair before adding, "Only we can decide who we are, what makes us what we are."

Silmeria nodded in understanding.''I...I know. It's just that... things...  hurts so much. And yet...'' she chuckled.''I seem to always allow myself getting hurt by other people. But I just can not tell myself to give up on them due the handfull of good ones that are there. Stupid of me isnt it...''she managed to calm her body and herself down and took a few deep breaths.''thank you... I... can not remember the last time I did this... usually... I just go on and on...''

Seeing her calm down made him smile.
"Don't worry about it. You have to deal with me, don't you? I think that's enough to make any one upset," he jested.

She took a step back and laughed shortly. ''Do you consider yourself really that bad of a person Killian? I don't'' she said removing once more the tears and their traces before she straightened his vest a little.

Sharing lightly what had silently weighted on her shoulders had helped relieving her a little. ''We... should get some more rest... and see when we wake. What will we do. Your room or the one here.'' both beds were not big but Silmeria would prefer Killian to take the bed and herself the floor. Despite his fever was gone it was him who needed the rest more still.

"I think they gave me the bigger bed, to be honest. But it's not incredibly larger than this one, but we both should fit on it just fine," he offered before smiling. "And no... I don't think I'm that bad. But I did get you to smile, didn't I?"

Silmeria nodded. ''Hopefully I can make you smile more too'' she said and put the ribbon on the table. ''Are you sure you actually want to share a bed with me? Personally it does not matter to me... but I can imagine after having been explained rather awkwardly once it is not common for most people to share a bed.''

Killian smiled, blushed even as she said she wanted to make him smile, too.
ANd at her inquiry about sharing the bed, he nodded.
"Of course. I wouldn't be able to sleep anyway, knowing you might still be worried or upset. If us sharing a bed means you can rest peacefully, it's the least I can do."

Silmeria nodded. She could do days without sleep but she was just very tired. She did not need as much sleep as humans did but some extra hours would not hurt. ''Now they will really think we are runaway lovers.'' she said with a giggle and laid down on the bed on her side, as much against the wall as possible so Killian had enough space to join.

Killian blushed, seeming to only get the connection in that moment.
"Well.." he said with a half laugh. "They'd only be half right."
They were run aways, of sorts, and when he saw her moving to give him space, he moved to settle in beside her, having  some trouble in shuffling close, only because the lack of a second arm was still, awkward to him and the wound was still 'sore.'

''The less they know the better. But I suppose it is common to places like this that many have a wild imagination. It is only a night thus far and we are a master and his maid, runaway lovers and I bet by now we ran away because our love was forbidden by your family causing us to runaway together.'' She chuckled.''I bet before the next morning falls I am pregnant'' Silmria sighed happily.''one of the things I missed... was these kind of quickly speculated stories. Till a certain degree.''

''Tell me when your temperature rises or feel anything off ok? The herbalist already told me it could happen again depending on if you take it easy or not''

Killian listened to her story, feeling himself heat at the thought. And boy were his ears burning at the idea of pregnancy.

'Sure..' he thought inwardly. 'A miracle night, considering...'
Well, he was still a virgin.

But then as he thought something over..

"Hey... did you happen to do this before? This.. pretending thing and 'running' away. Sounds almost as if you know too much about it," he teased, hoping to lighten the mood but well- he still felt so awkward and hot when close to her.

''You guessed right.'' Silmeria replied. ''I only pretend to be something if I have been it before though. For example, there has been a time I actually was a maid. I have performed various kinds of professions. Dancer, cook, weaver, made clothes...'' she chuckled at the memories.

''After I was born it took me a lot of effort to morph into my human form and maintain it in a way so others could not see what I was. But when I could do it better...'' she turned gave Killian a smile. ''It was a whole new world for me. My first job was at a castel where I eventually also became a general. I worked on a farm after that until... those who took me in knew what I was. I took various jobs and  magic contracts. I found all of the jobs quite fun. Having their own charming sides. But if I traveled with someone we rarely said who we truely were. Mainly to protect the one I was with.''

"Oh." He hadn't expected that. "I'm sorry... I.. I didn't know."

''No need to say sorry.'' Silmeria assured. ''There were fun times too. It is just that the bad memories pop up easier. Like the torture... and moments of betrayel.'' she sighed deeply before pressing a soft kiss on Killians forhead. ''We should sleep.'' she said eventually before closing her eyes

He gave a nod.
"Yes," he went on, swallowing the knot in his throat. "Sleep.."
But after she told him all that, and the kiss to the forehead...
His mind was soon racing, and he felt his cheeks flush as he simply remained there with her in his arm on the bed that was barely large enough for the pair of them.

Silmeria was not sure how long she or Killian slept but she woke first. It was dusk. Killian and her having fallen asleep somewhere in the late morning meant they had slept for about five or six hours. It was more then she usually had in more days but she did not feel that rested. Nightmares although less real and vivid like the one before had tormented her. But the time for weakness was over. Hopefully the nightmares would too if she did not had to see Killian wearing Erian's clothes.

'Why had I not burned them in the first place..' she thought to herself. Silmeria moved some hair behind her ears and felt a feather. It turned into hair again when she focussed but she wondered still how Killian would respond to her true form.

It took Killian much longer to fall asleep than Silmeria, but he was content to just lay there- after the initial two hours of feeling awkward and uncomfortable. Eventually, he just forced himself to keep his eyes closed and tried to count sheep, while concentrating on doing slow, steady breaths.
But as he did so, he was taking in Silmeria's scent- and his stomach ached. It reminded him of how Solita smelled. Idly he wondered if all women had some strange thing they shared where they all smelled good, but somewhere through his silly thoughts, he eventually fell asleep, mouth open, and snoring lightly.
And there was even just the slightest bit of drool on the pillow.

With the size of the bed and the way the two lay there was no way that she could get off the bed without waking Killian. Knowing this made Silmeria close her eyes again with a teasingly smile having seen the bit of drool.

She opened her eyes again though realising something; which was where Killian's hand was, very close to her butt and one of his legs. Suprisingly between hers. Something that did somehow feel kind of awkward but still couldn't be helped until the 'lord' would wake himself. Her eyes closed again. The scent of sleep had made her feel a little more drowsey again. Not to mention, it was rather comfortable and warm too.

And Killian adjusted himself in his sleep, securing himself a lot more closer to her to keep warm, before going ahead right back to sleep. After all, whatever bed this was he was snuggled up on, it was comfy!

Feeling him move made her open her eyes again a bit more. She wondered how he'd respond when he would wake and find himself like this so close to her. To Silmeria it mattered little although the words from the Seer echoed in her head. For a brief moment despite physically they had little till nothing in common, she saw Erian's form instead of Killians.

'Like hell I would... I promised myself after all.' she thought although could not shake the particular feeling.

It was not until Killian moved in his sleep again and his head ending up suspiciously close to her bossom she wondered if he was indeed sleeping and not pushing his luck. But again she could not become mad at him. As long as he slept well it was fine. Thistime.

A knock at the door came, and one of the servant's spoke through it.

"My Lord? We were wondering if you needed anything. Soup's on and laundry is being taken to wash."

But Killian slept through the knock and request, snoring softly. He had no idea he was this exhausted.

Without bloodbond there was no way Silmeria could communicate with the maid through telepathics and so there was not really another way then to speak. Wether Killian would wake or not was something she would have to find out.

''My Master is sleeping again. I will try to wake him so he can eat.'' she said. It was loud enough for the innmaid to hear but she did speak as soft as possible.

She looked at Killian's sleeping frame and sighed deeply. He needed to eat. That was something of certainty.

''Master Killian'' she whispered softly to him. ''It is time to wake and eat something.''

The words were enough to wake him, and groaning, he slowly opened his blue eyes, and stared back at her- in a groggy state of confusion and wondering..
was he still dreaming? Was there really a beautiful woman laying before him?

''Hello sunshine'' Silmeria said with a cheeky smile. There was a slight blush on her face which was due the fact one on Killians legs between hers and his knee dangerously close to her thighs.''It is getting dark now. One of the innmaids just knocked saying that the soup is nearly done. Considering you just had suffered a severe fever, I suggest you at the least eat some. Although it would be nice if...'' She brought her face closer to his.''..you removed your leg from my thighs now so I can move'' she winked and chuckled softly

It all came swimming back to him, and he would have tried to move sooner, even before her warning of how inappropriately positioned his leg was, was he not stiff from nerves. But the second she revealed it, his entire face went read as he exclaimed only the God's know what as he more or less fell out of the bed with his other leg, the one that hadn't been between her legs, was caught between the sheets while the rest of him crashed to the ground.

The sheets was not everything pulled along and within moments Silmeria fell on top of Killian since she had not resisted. But she was glad she was lightweighted. ''Sorry are you akright? I did not mean startling you this much.'' She managed to release herself from the blanket before she got up from Killian and offered him a hand to help him rise too.

Killian just lay there, wide eyed and trying to catch his breath. Then with a groan, he closed his eyes and raked a hand through his hair.
"Y-yeah... I just... I thought this was a dream..."
But then as his eyes went to search for his missing arm...
It only verified it was not there.

''Sorry. I am still real.'' Silmeria said with a gentle smile. She helped Killian up and adjusted his clothes so they were neat again.  ''You can go on ahead and eat something or wait for me so we can eat together. If you decide to wait though could you turn around a little? I am barely wearing anything unnder this.'' She was not lying, the fabric was just see through enough to notice that other then the gown, there was nithing concealing her breasts.

She took the secon clothing set;  the one she had changed into after the other got bloodstains but waited taking the gown off till Killian had turned around.

And not having seen a woman like that before, the poor soldier could do nothing more than stare! And once he realized his ears were burning and his nose, threatening to bleed, he turned around suddenly and stumbled out the apology, "S-Sorry. I... I didn't realize I... Yes.. I'll.. I'll look.. look away."

Briefly, Silmeria considerd teasing him further but decided she had done so enough. After changing she neatly folded the nightgown and placed it on the bed doing the same with the blanket afterwards.

''There we go'' she said after making a knot from her hair and used the black ribbon to keep it together before opening the door and gave Killian a bow. The innmaid was not to far off either. Silmeria held onto the bow as she spoke.''Master Killian, lets make our way downstairs. The food shall revive you some more.'' The tone she spoke on was sift and gentle. Exactly like how a maid was actually supposed to be.

Once the pair were ready, Killian offered his arm to help escort Silmeria. He didn't think much of the fact as he should be pretending to be a lord and not allowing one 'beneath' his status appear to be 'at' his status, it only solidified the fact the servants on duty believed the pair were lovers. So of course, everyone was staring at them, and whispering at what a handsome couple they were.

The few bits of gossip Killian caught made his ears burn and he was happy for the distraction when they were served fresh bread and soup.

Silmeria thanked the innmaids kindly for the food which she started to eat. She could not remember the last time she had fresh bread or anything else then raw meat from game she killed in the few times she had to eat. But by the Gods it tasted good. Wether it was their generosity or the fact she paid everything in advance good enough for several weeks she did not know. Heck. It could even be the company. She smiled at Killian as she heard the vague whispers of the innmaids. Her hearing was almost as good as one of an elf so despite they were in another room she could hear them which made her smile and even chuckle.

----

''I am sure he was the rebel older brother. Falling in love with a housemaid who grew up in the household and after not being permitted to be together ran away with her.''

''Or she was supposed to be wedded to his elder or younger brother. She has that nobility vibe on her too.''

Another girl gasped. ''what if they are siblings''

''Do not be ridiculous Eiris... they have nothing in common look wise.''

---

''Anything you'd like to do tonight?'' Silmeria asked Killian. The shops were already closed so they'd have to check for clothes another time. ''There is a chance the physician will come by depending on the weather. If not tonight he will come tomorrow morning.''

Killian ate a decent amount of his soup and just about all of the bread he could. So when her question was posed he looked up at her curiously.
"You know... no one has asked me that in a long time. I cant' recall the last time I had time for leisure."

''Then all the more reason.'' Silmeria replied. Using the knife and fork to cut the bread. ''Usually I'd suggest a truth or dare drinking game but you just had a terrible fever and... I have alcohol immunity so that would be rather unfair.''

''We could walk outside for a bit. Or play a cardgame. Plenty of options really''

Killian blinked.
"Alcohol immunity?" Thinking back to the only other time he drank, he chuckled a little and shook his head.
"Not fair indeed! I'm a terrible light weight. Just one drink is all I need. But I don't really drink much. Never saw a reason to I guess."
And not two seconds after he said that, a servant came by to offer them mead or ale.

''I will have a hot cherry mead if you have it. Otherwise... I will be alright with warm honeymilk instead''

She looked at Killian. ''You could take one if you like to give it a go. You do not have to finish it if you can not or have something totally different if you want to play it safe.'' she said. She encountered it more often people around her took upon the alcohol because she herself took it. But no matter for how brief it was, having nothing to worry about would be something good.

Killian sighed as he thought it over. He had a rough ride ever since he joined the army and had to march north. And though he wasn't accustomed to drinking it, he simply nodded.
"Just give me what she's having." And as the servant parted to get it, he shrugged. "Might as well enjoy this down time while I can." And moved to roll the shoulder of his remaining limb. Having lost the other put a lot more strain on the one that remained and he grunted a bit as he felt the knots in the muscles along the shoulder and his neck. It wasn't an easy life to be a soldier.

Silmeria watched him for a moment before a smile formed on her lips. ''I have an idea. It will most likely consume the rest of the evening but you put up with me this far. You deserve it. I have not done it in a while though so I could be a bit rusty. It also can be a little bit painful at first considering the state of your muscles but you are going to be feeling so much better when I am done with you.'' she assured. Not asking for permission and whatever kind of plan had reached her mind she had this look in her eyes that revealed he could most likely not talk her out of his.

She finished her food as well and the maid returned with two glasses of hot cherry mead and two desserts. She left after taking the soup bowls and plates so they could be cleaned.

Silmeria took a glass of mead and took in the warm scent of the dark red liquid. ''It's been to long.'' she said with a smile and took a sip. It appearantly was so good a blush formed on her cheeks and she nearly purred of delight

Killian wasn't sure how to respond to that, but he shook his head.
"I deserve it? I don't know.." But he sighed and smiled anyways. he hadn't proved to be evil in anyway, so he figured he had nothing to worry about but when he tasted the warm drink for the first time, his eyes widened in surprise.
"Oh wow! This is really good!"

''It is'' Silmeria said calmly allowing the liquid to twirl a little in the glass. ''I prefer this warm over cold and only when the weather is terrible with rain or cold. The taste comforts me. Same with warm honeymilk.''

Normally she would perhaps have ordered a few more glasses but she kept it with one for now and waited patiently for Killian to finish too before getting on her feet and walked to the bar giving a polite bow to her with a thank you and request to thank the others as well. Also she got a two goblets and the rest of the bottle of mead.

''Come. Let's go.'' she said to Killian before gesturing upstairs but did not walk up further until he had passed her.

---

Back in her room since that was where everything was, she closed and locked it keeping the key in the hole so nobody could peek through. ''I will require of you to take off all of your top clothing.'' she said as she knelt down at her bag and got three elegantly thin bottles out. The liquid seemed oily. One a warm light orange, neutral and the other seemed a bit purpleish.

''Trust me. You... do deserve it.'' she said. If Killian knew the value of these oils he'd certainly decline. But for now she just wanted to do this for him.

Killian was feeling good, real good. The warm drink helped to relax him, and the sweetness was not something he had enjoyed in a long time. And he did have a bit of a sweet tooth. He had grown up on an apple farm, after all.

Following her up the stairs, he felt a bit strange, warm and bubbly almost, but not in a bad way. Once he was inside, he almost didn't notice her locking the door. And when he turned to her and realized she asked him to remove his clothing, his cheeks turned pink.

"Wh... what? N-No! I couldn't!" For his mind could only think she might be leading him into doing something the pair of them should not!

'' Thinking ecchi things now are we?'' Silmeria teased before giggling. ''Do not worry. It is just a massage. If I wanted to have sex with you I would not force or command you into taking the clothes off.'' She assured.'' After taking off the top clothing you can lay on the bed, on your stomach please.''

Killian's nose could have gushed blood. Thankfully, it did not, but his face certainly turned as red as it! Realizing what sh e was offering, he dropped his gaze and furiously shook his head.

"OH! N-no, you don't have to.."
Because now he just felt even more awkward after she REALIZED where his mind went and then had a more innocent proposition!

''Just do it.'' Silmeria said with a smile. ''You have tense muscles right? It is a good way to relief you from tension and stress. It will be fine. I will only do your head, neck, shoulders and back. Not the front, your legs or what is in between. Promise. And like I said you... deserve it.''

She looked at him for a moment and picked up the bottles before heading to him. ''Please? It will just... help you a lot. You will realise when I am done.''

Killian sighed defeatedly through a small smile.
"Fine.' And moved to remove his shirt, turning away so she wouldn't have to see the ugly scar where his arm had once been. He was still self conscious of it, and to actually see it now not hidden behind a shirt....
He tried to ignore that though and moved to lay, belly down on the bed.

''Good'' Silmeria said softly before she sat down on top of his butt so she herself was comfortable as well and could reach everything. She opened the first flask which was color wise the most neutral. ''We will start with dryad's  treeroot extract. Do not worry, it was given by one to me.'' she said warming up the liquid in the bottle before she put it on her hands and very gently started to massage his shoulders. The scent was gentle and soft like Spring that would come after this horribly cold winter was over. She did not press the muscles to hard though. And gently removed the knots she found with circular movements.

Having a woman sitting on his rear...
It was definitely not something he could say ever happened to him, nor something he'd imagine, let alone be massaged. But once her fingers and the scents from the oil began to set in, he was having a hard time not moaning through his breaths.

''That's it. Relax.'' Silmeria said softly. It nearly sounded as if she was singing those words. Her hands were warm and the oil made sure she could pass over his skin with them smoothly. She also took her time with this and the first round ended which for sure was half an hour later when the dryad oil was completely taken in by his skin. Having gone from neck, shoulders, back and lowerback till the edge of his trousers until the surface muscles were no longer tense.

The second oil was fresh and had some hints of citrus for sure. Only this time it were the deeper muscles she would massage. And she started at the lower back. She was not sure wether Killian was asleep or not. If he had, she did not mind. Tonight was his night so to say and if he would be feeling good then it was enough for her.

The last oil was a rosey lavender and when she was finished a certain two hours had surely passed.

Killian hadn't fallen asleep, but he very well could have. Her hands worked like magic,a nd brought him to a state of being he never even knew was real. Hands so soft, but firm in their intentions, had him more or less a puddle of good when she was through, and a puddle of drool had collected, too!
It wasn't until she was done that he realized he had almost drifted off again, and with a moan, he whispered into the pillow, "Wow... I... I don't even know how to describe that."
And the way he spoke he acted as if she had just shown him 'a good time!'

Silmeria chuckled softly. ''Glad I could make you feel good.'' she replied. She shifted her weight a little before slowly getting off him. ''You will notice the effects as well when you move. Stiff muscles are the worst.'' she spoke from experience on thatone; It made it so much more restraining in both her forms escpecially when she had to fly. But for now, if you want at least, you can remain laying down.'' she walked to the table where she had put the glasses and bottle of mead on. ''Want another glass of hot mead? I can warm it warm enough for most of the alcohol to go away.''

Sitting up, Killian could already feel the difference.
"Oh wow..." he exclaimed, and at the suggestion of more mead, he nodded. "Yeah! That would be great!"A nd he sat there with a big smile on his face... none the wiser that he had a raging hard on tenting his pants.

''Glad to see you enjoyed it.'' Silmeria replied. And handed him the glass when she had finished heating the mead up enough for the alcohol to be gone.''Carefull. It is hot.''

She could hear the maids in the hallway and she could not blame them.  The walls were thin and Killians moans sure had been heard by a few people. She sat down beside him not having missed his boner. But figured it would be better not to mention it. Usually it would go away on its own.''Killian... I am... glad to have encountered you.'' She said softly

"Thanks!"
He accepted the the heated drink, and blew on it softly before testing a sip to check on its temperature. And whens he moved to sit down beside him, his eyes couldn't help but go to her chest, as his boner twitched. Hurriedly he averted his eyes and drank more of the drink, burning his throat a little and dribbling some down his chin. Wiping the run off on the bck of his hand, he turne to her and said, "I should be the one who's really glad, and thankful. You saved my life, after all, Sil."

''I just do not have a lot of happy memories with people. And despite I am a monster... you still treat me like a normal person. It may change when you actually see what I am but... I hope not. It is to soon to tell. I know, despite I do not know how. Saving is worth it. And... despite my age I surely can learn a lot from you if I stop running away. So for as long as I stay, I will be your blade. And your armor.'' She took a sip of her mead.''If you want me to be something of course then it is fine too.''

Killian shook his head.
"You needn't be any of that. If anything, I would want to call you a friend."

Silmeria nodded.''I'd like that. I will still be those other things as well. But not against my will. It is in my nature.'' She took another sip of her mead.''I want to learn again how it is like to dream. And eventually lay down my swords for good.'' She looked at Killian with a warm smile. I am sure you can find yours too again.''

Killian sighed and lowered his head.
"Yeah, I'd like that too. In fact, I wish I never took up a sword to begin with..."
And speaking of swords, that's exactly when he realized he had a raging hormone, that was quite obvious for all to see! And suddenly he snatched a pillow and held it over his lap, cringing as he wondered...
Did Silmeria see that?

''No need to worry about that you know.'' Silmeria said calmly.''Massages can do that. I tend not to really respond to them. Could be because I am not a real human. You are the first man I have seen so flustered about it though. Most other men I encountered instead of hiding it would attempt to hit on me instead. No matter the reason why they had it.''

The reply hardly calmed him, his face and ears still burning.
"Y-yeah, but I.. I mean to say is er... I.  I'm sorry." For he wasn't sure what else to say. This was so awkward and the hard on... Kind of painful and didn't seem.to be going away anytime soon.

''I will wear something more humanly apropiate from tomorrow on. I promise. I have no intention to embaress you in whatever way. I just... respond to things a little differently. If you want me to leave for a bit so you can calm down it is alright but... it is nothing to be embarresed about. At least not with me.'' she went to the table and brought the bottle back with her. ''Want a refill?'' she asked.

Killian has no idea to respond to all of that and simply nodded his head for more drink. Maybe that would calm him.

Silmeria poured him another before refilling her own glass too.

''Please... never scare me like that again.'' she said after a long pause ''I almost had to resort into doing something I actually never wish to do again. It may be selfish of me wanting to keep you alive but... when I save someone and put effort into doing so I tend wanting to keep the person alive. No matter what.'' she looked at the fire that was burning in the fireplace. When they were eating the maids most likely added more fuel since she certainly hadn't put those extra logs in.

Killian downed almost the whole drink before her words settled in. And at them, he sobered .
"I'm sorry."

Without her realising, some thin orange-red feathers had appeared between her hair. ''No need to say sorry... like I said I can be selfish.'' she finished her glass and put it aside. ''Maybe I am just scared to be alone again. It is... lonely up there in the sky you know... on your own. Soaring... soaring... so high all that engulfs me is the darkness that can be found around the world.'' she exhaled deeply before allowing herself to fall backwards on the bed. But with her hand she very gently caressed his cheek. ''Whatever your choices will be, I shall support them.''

In his half drunk state, all he could.do was.listen. He understood loneliness well. And guilt ebbed into his belly. He triedto drink it away. Then feeling her hand caress his cheek, he felt his loins burn in response as he eyed her body where it lay on the bed.
After a time of drinking her in, he told her, "You're beautiful, and kind. You won't be alone for long."

A soft yet somewhat painfull smile appeared on her lips along with a blush on her cheeks. Being a creature or not. Somehow being complimented made her feel a bit fuzzy inside.

She knew deep inside though that eventually she'd have to go once more. But till then, she would enjoy his company. ''Thank you'' she whispered and closed her eyes briefly. She was not tired but felt strangely safe. ''You know... you are quite the looker yourself too believe it or not.'' she caressed the other cheek too before slowly letting her hand fall on the sheets.

It was then there was a knock on the door. ''Mi-lord, ma'am, some hot baths are prepared. If you wish you can use them to freshen up.'' an innmaid spoke.

Killian was relieved with the distraction.
"Please, bring them in." And he scooted to sit at the edge of the bed before standing. His back was to Sil, so he couldn't fantasize over her kissable lips.

''We have a seperated bath area mi-lord. In the backroom. Towels are placed there and until you return to the counter nobody will disturb you.'' the innmaid said.

''Understood. Thank you. I will guide him to them and have a bath myself too.'' Silmeria replied.

''Of course.'' the Innmaid replied and Silmeria heard her leave.

''They are in seperated rooms.'' Silmeria assured as she got on her feet. It was not until she ran her hand through her hair, that she felt the feathers. Quickly making them go away. She handed Killian his top clothing. ''The baths here are of stone above a heatsource that is in the basement hence they can not be brought in. Quite efficiant actually.'' she said and took her bag. Looking for her other set but remembered it still needed to be cleaned from the blood. She simply would have to put on a normal summer dress instead she once had gained from the only two mother and father figure she had ever had. She gave Killian a small metal bell. ''Would, you happen to feel lightheaded, ring this and I will come to you. Got it?'' she asked kindly before heading to the door and turned the key to unlock it after he had put on the top clothing. ''Lets go.''

--

She guided Killian to the male side of the baths for which they needed to go downstairs for through the backdoor. It was dimly lit but light enough. And warm enough. A few towels were placed on a wooden bench near the stone bath that was large enough to hold two persons. But Silmeria went her seperate way, heading to the woman's half. Not that it mattered much; the wooden wall that seperated both sides was not actually that thick and she could hear every step he made. Not just that, there were some small holes in the wood as well which either side could use to look at the other.

She undid herself from her clothing before entering the hot water with a soft moan of delight. As warm as she always was, hot baths never ceased making her feel warmer and better. That until she was in it to long.

He felt embarrassed by his lack of knowledge on the baths and gave Silmeria a sheepish shrug.
"Guess I'll have to study these rules harder." He was used to a bath being within the home somewhere. The fact the baths had their own designated room surprised him. But not as much as the fact that, once he was settled into the waters, he could hear Sil moving on the other side of the partition, and found himself staring at her form as she undressed. But just as she went to remove her top, he looker away, and felt his hard on stiffen even more.

Not used to being so sexually aroused, for his relationship with Solita had been so sweet and chaste, he tried to keep his eyes averted, but soon found them returning as he watched her bath. And a wildness bubbled through him, aided by the alcohol, and he began to fantasize and to want.

Silmeria did not peek neither did she know Killian was looking at her. After a few minutes she took a piece of soap and sat on the edge so she could clean her skin more properly with it. Her movements were slow and circular. A bit like the massage she had given him earlier and after washing her arms, shoulders, nack, breasts and abdomen she stood up placing one foot at the edge so she could wash her legs. Unaware Killian was actually able to see everything of her.

Her skin was smooth where with most humans hair would be there and after washing her first leg she washed between her legs before moving to the other leg to wash that

It was when she did that that Killian turned around suddenly to keep his back towards the partition.
"Sil.. Silmeria. You may want to wash the other way." And his voice came out awkward, and croaky.

''How so?'' Silmeria asked. It was not till then she noticed some of the holes were large enough to peep through but she had not noticed before due to their angles. Basicly, the men could only view the women properly.

''I see... sorry.. I had not realised that'' she said as she lowered herself in the water again but had a flushed face. It was not that people never saw her bathe or naked before but somehow this felt a bit different.

His face was so hot, he swore it was on fire. And he was glad he didn't have to explain- because how could he? And his tongue felt swollen, as did his throat, besides. But once he heard her move to comply, only then did he feel a little bit better. But the uncomfortable situation could not be shaken so easily, and more than once Silmeria would hear him dropping his soap as he went about washing.

Silmeria enjoyed the rest of her bath but was the first to go out and dried herself with the towels finding them suprisingly soft. ''You are quiet though... did I do something wrong? If I did I'm sorry... I should perhaps learn some human customs from you'' she said softly. She did not dare asking how much he had seen but to most of her it did not matter that much.

She put on a cotton grey longsleeved shirt and put a dress over it which had a blue top and warmbrown long skirt with a pair of brown boots. She closed her eyes recalling the memory of those she got them from.

--
''Momma... Pappa...''
''Where are they little one'' Silmeria could still remember it like yesterday. A short chubby but loving woman. And she remember what she answered. And the scentences after that.
''I... don't remember... I don't remember anything but my name.''
''What is your name sweety''
''S-Silmeria...''
''What a pretty name. We will protect you Silmeria. You can stay with us until your parents are found.''

She could remember the heat of the burning city she had landed in back then as well. A city fire not her fault.
''Look at her... no burns. Nothing.''
''Perhaps we can find her family after they set up a survivors camp. Lets bring her home for now. This is no place for a child.''

--
''Come Silmeria. Play in the kitchen for a bit.''
''Okay pappa I will peel some potatoes for dinner!''

The man. Just as chubby as his wife. It was not often he was cranky but he did have that grumpy farmers look on him unless he smiled.

''What did the trip to the city and survivors camp give?''
''Nothing. Nobody seems to know her or have seen her before. Maybe something horrible happened which made caused her to forcefully forget. She did not remember anything from the city''
''It has been weeks now. She calls us mother and father. Lets be that for this girl. She needs a family and I do not think it would be wise to put her in an orphanage if she is traumatised.''
''You are right. She likes it here. And we raised children before.

---
''Tax time fellas. Time, to pay. Its due.'' the taxcollector whom disrupted the peaceful life she could have had for many more years.
''We have paid already. We can not give you any more or we will starve.'' her father replied
''You two are fat enough to last a lifetime. Pay the money or pay with your lives. I'd rather say slavery but nobody would want two middleaged farmers.'' the taxcollector said
''Mother, father, whats wrong..''
''Silmeria back inside.'' her mother called
''So... you were hiding this pretty little thing huh. I know, how about me and my men go to the barn with her and we will not come back until nine months later. Perhaps she will be pregnant then.'' the man licked her lips.
''Over my dead body.'' her father replied.
''Can be arranged.'' the taxcollector got off his horse and before she knew her father was stabbed in the chest.
She remembered herself and her mother screaming and rush over to him. Choking in his own blood.
''If you do not want your mommy dearest to go down this way too then just follow me'' the taxcollector said.
''I refuse. And you will not leave this place alive'' Silmeria replied as a silver tear rolled down her cheek which she put on her fathers wound.
''Mother... father... I'm sorry... I... remembered everything about a few months after you found me. I'm not human... but thank you. Please... don't hate me.''

It was then she got on her feet, walked towards the taxcollector until she was a mere inch away from him. Then, morphed in her true form. Killing the collector and those with him. But also those fearfull looks from the only two she'd ever could call mother and father.

A few very soft sobs escaped her but she still smiled. Glad she actually could remember them in good ways.

''Killian... did you... ever hear the story about the Searing Sky?'' she asked

Killian felt too awkward to leave the bath, even after he was done soaping up and rinsing off. But it was Silmeria's question that brought him out of his own distant thoughts, ones of Solita, and then the image of Silmeria but a moment before. His face was beet red, and he was happy for the reprieve.

He shook his head.
"No. I only knew a few simple tales as I grew up, and some of those tales were just made up by my father. But I do know a few Connlaothian ones, but none with that title."

''If it is alright I'd like to hear those stories. As for the searing sky... I will tell you when we're in my room alright? The story itself... nobody really knows where it took place.'' she sat down and waited patiently for Killian to finish bathing.

Killian went quiet.
"I take it this story is quite important to you," he murmured. "I'll hurry up and get dressed. We've spent enough time here as is." And he splashed off whatever soap remained on him, stepped up and out of the bath and was quick to dry himself off with a towel. He was dressed, though his hair was still wet, and he stepped out of the men's bath house while scrubbing down his white, blonde hair.

''Important huh..'' Silmeria muttered. He was not wrong. The story was about herself. But she woukd alter it a little so he woukd not know.

Before they left the baths though she could not resist taking a towel and dry his hair.

''Did mi-lord and mi-lady enjoy the bath?'' The barkeeper asked.

''We did thank you.'' Silmeria replied.

''Anything else I could do for you both?''

''Some hot milk with honey would be lovely if you have it''

The barkeeper nodded and looked at Killian

Once addressed, Killian did the same.
"Yes, some milk and honey sounds good right about now." And he turned to Silmeria and asked, "Should we wait on our drinks or have it brought to our room?"

''It is done in a minute'' the barkeeper assured.

''We can wait then'' silmeria replied.

When done they received a tray with two large mugs and a a few small sweet treats.''I wish you both a good night. Do not make to much noise though'' he joked

''We will not.'' Silmeria assured and took the tray along. But did not go to her room but Killians instead. It was not locked but everything was still the same as when Killian had left it:

'' what would you like first. You telling me stories or the other way around.'' She asked as she put the tray on the table

Killian tried to rebuff the comment about the noise, but seeing how his 'partner in crime' easily deflected it with nonchalance, he sighed and simply followed after her, giving an apologetic look that he hoped the man would understand as 'he's innocent!'

Though it did not matter, soon the pair were in his room now and Killian took his drink and found a seat on a chair near by. At her inquiry about stories, he stared at her curiously before asking, "Are you really that interested in some silly, farm country Connlaothian stories?"

''I would love to hear them. No matter how dull you think they are. I like stories. Legends. Fairy Tales. So if you have any to share I will listen.'' Silmeria replied as she sat down comfortably on the old carpet on the floor.

Killian went quiet as he thought over her request.
Giving a small smile, he suggested, "How about the story about the yellow apple on the red apple tree? I always liked that one when I was younger. Though it's simple, I always thought it was something.. well, charming."

''I do not know it but you like it. So I am sure that it is a nice story'' She did not find it odd. Being a fighter. A killer. And then able to sit like this at a warm comfortable fire, with a large cup with honeymilk in it. She even tasted a hint if vanilla as well. This drink was her kind of nectar. Right now, with her new friend at a nice warm fire and a hot drink. A troubles in her head were gone. Just, a littlebit if happyness.

"Very well. There was this orchard that went by a common name by a common family. They grew the most shining red apples in their orchard. It was their claim to fame, and the family lived well of it for many years. It seemed they were lucky, but the couple who owned the orchard were displeased, though not in their profit or the type of life they had, but for their lack of a child. So the pair took a holiday to a town far away, that had a well that was said to grant wishes. Here, the took a copper, and wished fervently upon it for a child and then dropped the coin into the well."

"Upon their return, a strange storm passed over the village, and in the morning, a few trees had been uprooted from the fierce winds. As the pair took to working at clearing up the fallen trees, the wife found a strange, green apple in the mix of all the fallen red ones." And here he paused to look over at Silmeria to see how she was fairing.

Silmeria was hooked on every word Killian said and nodded to him quietly with big curious eyes as if she were a child. She did not care right now that she looked a little childish. She just wanted to enjoy this.

"The woman plucked the apple and was surprised to see it was not only green, but far larger than any of the apples they had ever grown. Taking the apple back to their home, they set it on a basket and come morning, they awoke to thesound of a baby crying. When the couple went to check, there lay a baby inside the fruit basket, and no green apple could be seen."

He paused to smile warmly at Silmeria.

"Though it seemed they had a happy ending , things hardly stopped there. As they stepped outside, their entire orchardwas full of trees ripe with those large, fat green apples. There was so much, it proved too difficult for two to harvest and as they began to load the bushels and make their way to town, they had too much to sell so they headed towards the city. There, they sold all of their apples and made.more Monet than they could have dreamed. They had enough gold and stayed the night n the city, but when they awoken, they were surprised to see many people in the streets, frantic and confused and just about all of them held new born babies, crying , in their arms."

Somewhere she could imagine how things had been in a situation like that. ''Then what happened'' she said. Her voice as sift as a whisper. The exitement and anticipation could actually be heard from her voice. She knew many stories. But this was not one of them. Yet.

"To those who were angered by the child replacing their apple, they found the farmer and left the child at his feet, and soon many others were doing the same, and the poor farmers didn't know what to do," he went ok, giving a small smile. "There was literally a bushel.or so of children now placed at their feet!"

Silmeria nodded quietly wanting Killian to continue. Her way of thinking made her wonder why so many left the children like that. But she drew no conclusions yet.

"The couple had no idea what to do with all of these children. They couldn't afford to take care of them, yet to see so many children just abandoned made the farmer's wife weep." Here, Killian paused as he thought over the rest of the story. "The rest goes on in various ways.. I've heard quite a few endings, actually. One being that the farmer's were punished for using magic and hung, while the children were forced into orphanages. Another ending was that, those who had given away their child born from an apple, turned into an apple themselves.. and so on."
Killian smiled as he thought over the tale.

"I like the version my father came up with best- though it's a stretch from the original. His was that the farmers were condemned, but the infants, as if by over night, grew up into older children and found a means to help their parents, and the large family escaped and lived happily ever after in an Orchard far from their home in the enchanted Niahi Woods."

''I think I'd like that ending best too'' Silmeria replied with a smile. ''I could tell you the story of the Searing Sky. If you want. Can not really say it is a happy story though so if you want something jolly instead I could tell one.''

"What don't you tell me whichever is your favorite?As long as the story is good, I don't mind either way."

''Favorite...'' she said pondering. It was not nessesarily that the Searing Sky was her favorite. It was just something she'd prefered to tell in case he would get to see her other form.

''It was several hundred years ago in the outskirts of Serendipity. A man found a woman, bathing. in a small spring. There was something strange about that woman however. He found her majestic despite her form being to fragile to be considered as such. It was just the aura she gave off.

Her robes seemed from another world as well. Red, made of fine silk. Adorned with golden thread. He asked the woman wether the robes were hers and she said yes. When he asked her if she came from the sky, she said yes. When he asked if she was an angel, she said no. Telling him that she had never even seen one.

She went out of the spring and put on her clothes. The man had been decently raised and yet he was unable to take his eyes from her. 'Are you a nymph?' he asked her on which she shook her head. Then, he asked what she did was. Answering that she shared the skies with dragons. Could fly high above the earth. And that she was a phoenix. The man did not believe her. Rarely had there been stories about phoenixes and none were described as a human. The woman backed away, engulfed herself in flame, and when the flames vanished, there was a phoenix where the woman stood moments before.'' she looked at Killian, wondering if he would find it an interesting story or not.

Killian's blue eyes seemed to come alive from the story. So interested was he that he was leaning closer to Silmeria.

"A phoenix?" he asked in a voice barely above a whisper. "Can you describe to me all of the details of this creature?" For he wondered if it was some sort of flaming angel, though from the small stories he had heard, he presumed a phoenix was some sort of mythical bird. Perhaps he was wrong. He was a simple farmer, after all.

Silmeria gave Killian a smile. ''The man understood why he thought her to be majestic. Her feathers were colored like fire. Shades of red, orange and yellow. Eyes like an azure sky. Her form, he could not place it. It had the ferocity of an eagle. But it had elegance too. Like a swan.'' she paused briefly. ''The man stumbled backwards and fell over a root. Unable to speak. Until he looked in the phoenix's eyes. She looked pained. And after engulfing herself in flame again she turned herself human once more.

'You fear me don't you.' The phoenix said before looking away. 'I get it. You are not the first. And most likely not the last.'

She turned around ready to leave but felt a hand grabbing hers. The man had stood up and quickly grabbed it.
'I do not fear you' he told her. 'It was your beauty. Magnificense. Nothing I have ever seen before. I did not mean to hurt your feelings. Let me...' the man said stumbling over his words as he attempted to make it right.
'Allow me to buy you dinner.' he said eventually.

The phoenix turned around and looked at him. Not really certain what to say or how to respond to what the man just said. His eyes seemed true, she had to give him that.
'Please?' he asked her.

The girl thought for a moment and nodded and agreed.

The man brought her to his home where he prepared the dinner himself. When they ate the first thing he noticed was the way she sat, and used the cutlery; It revealed she was not new at this. And so he asked. She did not tell him much, other then that she had once served a king in her earlier years and that she was used to royalty and nobility customs.''

Killian gave a crooked grin.
"I might have reacted the same were I in his position. To see such a fantastical creature... why, I wouldn't know what to do with myself! But please.. do go on. The story is very mesmerizing!"

Rather then interupting the story to reply, Silmeria nodded.

''The two talked and talked till the next sun rose. During their conversations though, the man had noticed this phoenix was emotionally damaged. They have a kind of magic named bloodbond. Which is used to form a contract with someone. Would a phoenix contract a person, she has to protect her contracted, and the contracted must protect her. Each make terms. Agreedments. But, most of her contracted ones, betrayed her. Abused her power for horrible things. Yet. She did not want to give up un human or elvenkin or anything else that walked the earth. Hearing that, made the man get on his feet and walk towards her, kneeling when he reached her. 'I have no right to say this. But people are worth giving a chance. You do not need to contract me, for me to protect you. I want to show you how beautiful the world is.'

The phoenix was not sure how to respond at first but she shook her head after a few minutes. Saying that she couldn't. Would she trust someone again, she would end up hurt. And she was not sure if she could handle being torn apart by betrayel again.

The man nodded in understanding. Asking if she had somewhere to go. She told him, all she had to go to was the sky. He offered her a room in his own residence. A place to call home where somebody would be waiting for her if she felt the need to. This, she did accept. Under the condition she would pay for the expenses.

They rested. Having talked for so long, had made them miss some sleep. But the following day, he invited her to come along with him. Not telling where they would go. She was curious so she followed him. Realising that he lead her into a large town. She was frightened at first. What if she would turn into her real form? He assured her that everything would be fine. He showed her everything and for the first time since they had met he got her to smile.

She stayed with him for a while. Longer then she had actually intended but they grew close. But then, she noticed that the man seemed troubled and she asked.

He told her that there was trouble and that he had to face it. But it was dangerous. The phoenix, begged him to let her help him. To repay his kindness. He agreed. So together they faced it. There were corrupt men collecting taxes. Thrashing the homes of those who did not pay. They were nothing more then bandits whom had stolen the gear from the real collectors to make an easy coin. Everyone feared them. And all of a sudden, they were in the town. A fight broke lose. The phoenix seemed to be accustomed to fighting but when the fight was almost done, the man got wounded fataly''

Killian listened quietly. He was quite fascinated with the tail and was leaning forward, eager to hear more. But he didn't dare open his lips, and waited for her to continue.

"Did the man die?" he found himself asking.

''Seeing her friend fataly wounded, and the causer of that wound on his way to finish the job made the phoenix's eyes turn red with fury. Runes glowed on her blades as an old incantation escaped from her lips. With one stab of her sword in the pavement, she eliminated the remaining bandits with the magic she had before rushing over to him. Crying tears of silver which she allowed to fall on his wound. But it did not heal him fast enough. Not wanting to lose her friend, she started chanting once more. Making one cut in each of his arms and both her hands which she placed on them. Forming a bloodbond she so feared of creating. It saved him. But restricted her. Still weak, she brought him home and took care of him. Letting him adjust to the power he shared with her. Since he, having received her blood, would be able to do things with fire until she would break the contract.

She had never loved before. But after a few more months she started to develop feelings for him. And he made it seem like it was mutual. They did everything together. Well. Almost everything. Occasionly he had to go to places which he did not want to bother her with despite her political knowledge. Then a time came he seemed more troubled. He knew that the phoenix eventually had to leave. She as a bird, belonged in the sky. And she had told him that she could not stay forever. Those words most likely drove him to what he did. Or maybe, all their time together had been a lie. He took her along. The journey was long. And he said that he wanted to have a holiday with her. And that, they did. But the last day, he lead her to a camp. Not just any. In the camp, there were dragons in cages. Beaten. Broken. Wether he paid them or was paid she did not see. But those who tamed all those beasts aproached her. Calling her a fine specimen. It was then, she realised she had been betrayed once more. With fire she destroyed the few who aproached her and took her sword. Throwing over the man she loved and stabbed him fataly. Forcefully broke the contract and calling everyone the same. She morphed and ascended high into the sky. It had been enough. What she felt there, was worse then all those other times combined. And as she allowed herself to burn, the flames spread. Wider. Wider. Until the sky itself was on fire as far as the eye could see. Till all of a sudden, the flames were gone. Some say that she was reborn as someone new. Others, say that her soul is still in the sky waiting to be liberated from heartache.''

This, concluded the story. At least how she had told it. It had been slavers, not tamers and there was no camp. But in rough lines, it was how it had been told.

It surprised Killian to find his eyes had become wet. But the story was so striking, he could feel the pain of the characters, and unknowest to him, the pain of his companion.

"By Angsar's name.." Blinking back some tears, he turned away and smiled at himself before moving to brush them off with his hand.
"That story... such a sad tale." He shook his head, still trying to digest it all. "Earlier in my life I'd deny such a possibility, that men can be so eager to be evil. But war.... I've seen so many taints now that I wonder how children ever could remain so jaded."

Realizing he was taking too sincerely to her tale, he gave her a small smile.
"I'm sorry... the story, it was good. I... don't think I've ever been moved by such a tale. I even feel relieved the woman could escape..."

But thinking back to the story, he recalled her mentioning of tears. Silver tears.

Silver tears that healed.


And it was in that moment he began to piece it all together as his eyes widened as he turned to her.

"That story..." His eyes moved, as if reading her, like a book. "Silmeria... is this... is this a story... about you?"


The tears, the betrayal, the distrust.....
Could it be?
Was she this phoenix? This being from the sky?

Silmeria did not reply right away. Truth be told telling lies and keeping them up was not what she liked to do. Pretending to be something else.

Her gaze went to the heavily damaged carpet. ''It... is.'' her gaze did not left the carpet finding herself unable to look Killian in the eyes.'' In major lines anyway... there was no camp. I was lead to the middle of nowhere.'' She paused

"I am the one who seared those skies. Wanting nothing more then to annihilate each, and every one of you. Those few who actually did not betray me made me change my mind"

Killian went quiet at her confession. It was so hard to wrap his head around, such a tale.. such a legend....

"You're a strong woman," he found himself commenting, after a time. "Though if this is all true, then you've probably seen so much good and bad throughout your life time." And he paused, giving her a sympathetic look. "I'm sorry."

''No need to say sorry for what others did.'' Silmeria said as she got on her feet. ''I work in cycles. I was born at the wrong place at the wrong time. I never knew my mother or father and it was in a time of war. When I died and came back, I served the wrong family for generations. When I ended myself after that, I was taken in by a farmer and his wife. But I could not hide my true form forever and I changed when I felt that I had to to protect them. They feared me but we parted on good terms. The fourth... ended with the story I just told you. I am now in my fifth. Every time I enter a new cycle I awake as a 7 year old with amnesia. It takes about 3 months for all of my memories to come back. But from those I have contracted. Most ended up using or betraying me. Erian hurt me the most. But that was because I loved him.'' she walked to the window and looked outside. She could feel she was crying and did not want to show that to Killian just now. He called her strong. But she felt anything but that.

''If... you do not want me to stay I get that. It will not be the first time for me someone sends me away knowing or having seen what I am. Or they accepted it by hearing it and screamed in terror when they saw my other form. If you want me to stay then... please do not pity me or feel sorry for me. Erian is dead. And I told myself to never love again.''

He couldn't believe what she was asking. Even after all that she confessed, he still saw her as the Silmeria he had met. The Silmeria that had saved his life.

"Silmeria.." He moved towards her, placing a hand on her shoulder. "I would never ask you to leave. After having trusted me with your story..... Sil..." But his words escaped him, when he realzied...
Was she crying?

''I am many things'' she said silently but dared to turn around to look at Killian again with tear stained cheeks. They were not silver though since she had no intention of healing now. ''I am only strong if a situation requires me to be it. Aside from that... I am a wreck. I suppose I never really got over Erian's betrayel. But it makes me happy that you want me to stay.'' with her sleeve she wiped the tears that were there but new ones came regardless.

Killian could feel her pain, like the sting of the winter frost. It settled into him deeply as he thought about his own anguish on his situation with Solita, being held in the iron grip of the Grand Duke.
And though that made the fire, the passion to move on and to save her, grow, he could not do that to Silmeria, no matter how much she wanted to help. It would be too much like repeating her past, and his war shouldn't be hers.

"You deserve better, Silmeria," he told her gently. "Not everyone in the world is so cruel or selfish. I just hope you can make peace." Because he's seen the agony that can do to a person, and to think she had several life times to grieve over it, he felt it made the agony that much worse.

''I used to think that a lot of things were punishments for what I did. Tricked or not. I still killed of people. Innocent people. I can never attone for that. I just want to help as many people as I can. Even if there is only one person on this globe worth saving, then I will do so. That is just who I am. I keep trying. I do not regret saving you. And who knows. Maybe you can save me from everything haunting me. There are plenty of things I have not dealt with.'' she took a deep breath and put no effort in drying the rest of her tears. She would just let them dry to the air.

''The first night I kept you warm in my other form. And after you collapsed I flew you here. When we get Solita, we will fly again. And maybe somewhere in between. No pulling feathers.'' she noted in a motherly tone. She was rebuilding her little wall again now.

Killian let her words sink in for a while before speaking.

"We are all imperfect, Silmeria. But it is good to see you still try to find the good in us all. But this war...."

Killian side. "Nothing will be easy." And he offered her a small smile. "Though I suppose you wouldn't be used to easy?"

''Looking back, the easiest was the farmers life. I loved it. Growing crops, baking, tending to the animals. I did not have my memories at first but when they came back to me, it was a good positive difference from the wars I saw in the cycle before. But true. I... never really had an easy life. Somehow I am always on edge. Unable to lay my blades down as it were. The few times I tried, were the moments I regretted the most.''

Her gaze went outside again for a moment. ''I am... happy though. Now.'' a smile formed on her face. ''You still treat me like you did before you knew what I was. I am used to people either dropping to their feet praising me like some long forgotten God, or back away in fear, or laugh. Not believing me. So... thank you.''

Killian gave a sigh, even wilting some.
"That's a nice compliment, but I've seen enough now to know now to second guess another."

Shaking his head, he thought back to her earlier comment and found himself smiling in reply.
"Yes.. I'd have to agree. The best times in my life feel as though they were back on the orchard. Things were.. simpler then, and dreams weren't something I was afraid of. Wars even seemed magical, the future, anything I could make it..."

He laughed at himself and shook his head, casting his eyes to his feet.

"Though that could also be thanked to my youth. Youth and niavity seem to go hand and hand."

''Not sure.'' Silmeria said in thought. ''As we grow older we lose our ways of thinking simple. Hence we make it ourselves more difficult then we should. You kind of learn that if you turn back into a kid every time you 'die' '' she jestered.

''I tend not to learn from it as much as I should. I could have introduced me as a phoenix from the start. But since I am scared of how people react to the real me, I didn't. I considered lying too when you asked if the story was about me. I was just tired of pretending.''

She paused for a moment. ''It is not a bad thing to be naive, Killian.'' she took a deep breath and exhaled calmly. ''What will we do sleepwise?...'' she asked.
Unless asked she would not mind sharing the bed again. Speaking openly about everything earlier tended to give her nightmares.''

"Though exhausted, I'm not sure I can sleep at the moment. But I guess we should," Killian agreed, not realizing what context she was actually asking in that question.

''Want to stick in one room again or do you prefer some privacy.'' for a moment she wondered if she should admit she was a bit scared to be alone right now but one confession a day would be more then enough for her. Until her wall was back up again fully it would be that way.

Regarding his comment of he was not sure he could sleep however, she looked at him. ''You need your rest more then I do.''

Killian blinked, and felt his cheeks heat a little at the clarification, and also felt a strange stirring in his gut.

"Oh, well I uh... I had presumed, though um, s-sorry,t hat I presumed anything at all, but I had just thought..."

He sighed. His tongue was tangling in knots!

"Well.. if you.. you'd prefer us to stay in.. in separate rooms.." he went on, with an awkward clearing of his throat.

''I do not mind sharing. Truth be told you make me feel at ease.'' She admitted.

There was a blush on her cheeks although wether it was due saying partialy why or something else she did not know.''I will leave the choice to you though. If we share the bed again, do turn around for a bit when I will change.'' She headed to the bed where her nightgown had been left behind on earlier. Not that him turning away matteted, for all she knew he had seen everything anyway. But she supposed it was time to pick up human decency again.

At such a suggestion, his face went completely red.

"Y-yes, but of course." And he turned around already, as if it were already happening.
"but if.. if it makes you more, more comfortable, Silmeria." he gave a nod, trying to calm his anxiety. "I'll stay."

''Thank you'' she said softly and started to change clothes since Killian was looking away already anyway.''At the least I no longer have to fuss about any feathers appearing in her hair.'' She jestered. It did not mean she did not have to be careful but around him it at the least would not matter.

''I am done changing.'' She assured and folded the okd farmers clothes up before puting them in her bag.''I will need to teach you how this bag works too. Then you can store things as well.''

Still rigid, despite her now being modest, Killian nodded.
"Bag?" He raised a single brow skeptically, and went on with a playful tone, "So you keep magic bags too? Or are you just afraid I'm too inept on how to open a woman's purse?"

And he immediately felt lame for saying that the moment it left his lips.

Silmeria laughed.''with this bag you need to know what it looks like to take something out. In the detail. Picturing it. Right now the only thing you can take out is your own armor. But there will be rations in there. Maps. Also some small kegs of good ripened wine and ale. My own armor. Weapons. If I empty this and put it down neatly it will cover the whole floor. I can show you tomorrow, or now if you prefer.'' She said.''Also. Those who have no permission to open it will have their hands only grabbing a lot of squishy and crunchy bugs. It is also immune to magic.''

"Squishy bugs?" Killian made a face, but he was still smiling.
"And I think I'm too exhausted for much else today."

Silmeria nodded.''Understandable. I will show you tomorrow how it works and what to do to make sure you do not grab in...  crawly things.'' She exhaled calmly.  ''Change in nightclothes. We should sleep.'' She said softly as she sat down on the covers.

Killian nodded, and moved somewhere else in the room to give him a bit of privacy while he changed. But it was difficult, that much was obvious in the noise of his struggles as he tried to remove his garb with just his one hand. But he eventually got his shirt and pants off, but getting into new clothes was a whole other challenge. He never thought he'd be so stumped over buttoning a shirt, but then again, he was still not used to his current handicap of only possessing one arm.

When it looked like Killian was in a bit of trouble, Silmeria got up from the bed and helped him a bit. It would take time for him to get used to this. ''I'm sorry... I did not notice you sooner...'' if she had, perhaps she still could have saved his arm after all.

After she finished helping him she returned to the bed and laid down on her side so Killian had enough space to join her.

"W-well, it's not like I was asking for help," came his soft reply, not realizing what she meant and presumed she was referring to helping him dress.

''I meant your arm...'' Silmeria said softly. ''There is magic out there that could help it grow back but performing it is not easy. It is really painfull. In theory... if we perform contract magic I could help you fix it too but as selfish as it may be I am not ready for contracting just yet.''

She exhaled calmly. ''Also... not asking for help is not a reason for me not to give it.'' she said with a smile she gave him.

Killian remained seated, and feeling awkward on the bed. He hadn't gotten in it quite yet, and sat there now, thinking over what she said.

"I would never ask you to do that for me. I wouldn't let you."
Not after he knew what she had gone through. Besides, if anything... this was a consequence of him joining the army, of wanting to be a part of this war, even if he didn't realize what that truly meant in the end. But he was honorable if anything, and he would serve his time as promised and could only hope to get out of this alive.

Solita...
He could only hope she was still alive. Even if that crazy woman was right..
Even if Solita went to another lover...
He just wanted to know, more fervently now than before, that she was at least alright. It would make losing his arm at least worth something, even though this battle was not over her.

''Erian did not ask either. And yet I did it to save his life. For a long time I thought... that the whole time, he had staged everything. Including risking death to force me to contract him. Knowing I did not want to lose someone I saw as a friend. That everything was fake.'' she chuckled. ''I can not ask him that anyway. But do promise me. Not to die on my watch. Ok?''

Killian sighed.
"I'm not sure I can promise that, Silmeria, but I can try."

''Trying is good enough for me'' she said softly before she made sure she lay down comfortably enough to fall asleep and not move to much which would cause Killian to be shoved out of bed later. There was a better idea though. ''You can lay close against me if you like. I will not control the fire this time so it can get pretty cold.''

"Control the fire?" he blinked. He didn't fully comprehend the meaning behind that, so he could only hope she'd explain the extend of this power, because despite all they've been through, he was still nervous to snuggle up to her real close.

''As in... I will release the fire from me so it will burn and die naturally. When I choose, even when I sleep I subconsciously control the fire to keep the room warm.'' she was not sure if her explenation was good enough. ''Don't worry... I will not burn you. I did not burn you the other times now did I.''

Killian sighed, a small smile on his lips.
"I would never accuse you of harming me. You've been so kind to me. If anything, I truly do owe you my life."

And though he felt awkward, he wondered if the bit about the fire was her way saying she did want him close, and after a moment, he moved to rest up close to her. A thrill ran through him, causing bumps to rise on his skin at the touch of her soft body, and the scent coming from her hair. And she was warm. It was nice to be so close. He could only get this close to Solita in his dreams...

And even those have been turned into nightmares.

Her breathing was calm. Not mentioning anything about him owing his life to her. Right now, he would spare her from a night long of bad memories returning to her dreams.

She placed one hand on his arm before she fell asleep and would not wake until Winter's late dawn colored the sky.

It might surprise her when Killian was already awake and dressed when she got up. Though he was sitting at the end of the bed, working slowly, carefully, buttoning up his shirt. It was still tricky a feat to do without the help of his other arm, but he figured he'd have to get used to it, and didn't realize his frustrated grunts and shuffling might wake her.

Noticing Killian was not beside her made her startled for a brief second but calmed down right away realising where he was.

''Hey'' she said as she got up. ''Slept well?'' she rubbed her eyes, yawned and stretched her arms upward for a moment.

It was then she realised what he was doing and smiled. Though not on this shirt, there were also stave kind of buttons which would be easier to close for him. She'd have to keep that in mind when they would get new clothes for Killian to wear.

"Yeah, sorry if I woke you," he went on, pausing a moment in his fumblings to give her a sheepish smile. "But I wanted to try this again. I know I'll have to figure out how to dress myself."
It's not like his limb would be coming back, and he was starting to come to peace with that. However, it was no easy task.

''There are stave shaped buttons as well. They are easier then those small ones.'' She assured as she swept her legs over the side of the bed to get out. ''You did not wake me though.''

She traced her hair for any feathers but did not yet remove the three that had appeared. She went to her bag and took out a brush to comb her hair. ''Did you sleep well?''

Killian nodded.
"I did." And he sighed at the thought of an easier way to button up clothing.
"I'm just lucky this clothing hadn't laces. Could you see me trying to thread anything?"
And at that, he smiled.

''Waving the cord through loosely and then when done very gently pulling it.'' Silmeria replied regarding if it had to be threaded. ''I had my wing broken once which in my case is also my arm. Most of my clothes were corset dresses. Imagine the fun I had.'' she said with a chuckle. ''Especially because I was insanely stubborn and did not want people to help me.''

She finished brushing her silken smooth long white hair and wondered what she actually should wear. Last night clothes were good quality farmers clothes but most of them thought they were nobility. To keep questions from being asked it would be best to put on something that would life up to their expectations. At least her bloodied clothes were being seen too after Silmeria convinced with only one simple explenation how it got there. She would get them back tonight.

She figured she'd go with her secondairy white set but waited with putting it on until Killian would be done. He had gotten this far and seemed to get the hang of it with these buttons slightly. It would be rude if she did not let him finish.

"I don't know if you're stubborn so much as strong minded, " he teased. "And I'm beginning to wonder if there isn't anything you can't do." And just then he declared, "Ah ha! All finished!" Though it was frustrating, he felt like he just conquered a lot.

''Perfect'' Silmeria said after correcting his collar a little. ''You might still like those other buttons better but the best option is to try a few. Now.'' she gestured Killian to turn his head away so she could change and after he had, she was back in her white and black shoes, white dress, loose sleeves and the cloak that covered one shoulder and arm but left the other one fully explosed. Her hair was in one simple tail with the few feathers gone.

''One thing left for you, Sir Killian.'' she said taking a comb and very gently untangled his white blonde hair until it was smooth. ''Trust me. There are plenty of things I can not do.'' she assured. ''Like behaving like a normal human or elf with their modesty. You may want to teach me the things I lack on those fronts.'' she said and finished with his hair.

"What do you mean?" he asked softly, but immediately realized what she was asking as his cheeks heated in a flush.

''There are just things I know I should be embarresed about but I am not. And plenty of things that I know that have to be done but do not nessesarily understand why. I would like... to be more human you know. Not just the animal.'' it was a simple way to put it. But to her, there was a huge gap between knowing it, and feeling or understanding it. She simply had been good at following orders; wear this because woman usually wear these clothes. Bow to that person because he or she is from noble house. Act assertive. Eat with cutlery. Do not speak about death and above all. Do not take every handsome strong guy with you to your bedroom for sexual pleasure. She knew love sure. But it was for her not nessesary to feel it for someone.

She took her coinpouch and a few hard leather pouches that contained other items before she went to the door. ''I just hope you can help me with that. If not well. I will remain the bird.'' she smiled at him before opening the door so they could go downstairs for a good breakfast. ''Oh... I paid everything here in advance so you can eat and drink as much as you want.'' she assured. Not sure if she had told him before.

It took some time for it to settle in what she proposed, though as they made their way down to breakfast, he promised her, "Silmeria... About all of that... I can help you. I will. But just know you'd be getting your information from a very naive man." And he offered her a smile and pulled out a chair for her to sit.

''Thank you''Silmeria said with a smile as she sat down. Theoretically it was her job to do it for him being his 'maid' and all but she did not mind. There were a few other people downstairs enjoying breakfast. Many being rather simple travelers only staying one or two nights. She wondered when they actually should go. Killian knowing what she was, would it be flying or walking.

One of the serving girls arrived to take their order. ''Mi-lord, mi-lady, what can I get you two to drink? Breakfast is being worked on but please tell us if you have any specific wishes.''

''Hot honeymilk and a pot of herbal tea please.'' Silmeria said.

The girl nodded and gazed at Killian.

"Uh... meat, eggs and bread if you got it."

"We got it," she told him with a wink. "Anythign to drink?"

Killian blushed. "Oh, uhh... maybe some juice or milk. Which ever you have."

"No juice, but I can get you some milk. Would you like it warm?"

He nodded, and the woman left to inform the cook what they wanted while Killian sighed with some relief.

"Milord.. milady?" he gave a small, sheepish smile and shook his head at that one. "Not sure how convincing I can be in my roll.." he went on, scratching a little at his attire. "But I suppose no one is really questioning us."
ANd hopefully no one really knew how a noble man acted here because he certainly didn't!

''I served numerous nobles. You do it pretty well considering a rebelious one who did not feel like studdying politics, customs, manners... all she did was horseback riding, archery, swordfighting... and eventually cut her long hair before dashing off with her lover. Was a real shame to be honest. Being that woman's handmaiden was quite fun.''

She paused and gave him a smile. ''besides. They interpeted we were nobility because of the way I had clothed you, and how I was clothed myself. I did not confirm or denied anything.'' she said with a wink.

Killian sighed through a smile.
"It's strange what people will presume based on what they see alone. It's like they've created an alias for us without even knowing anything about us."

''Believe it or not, that is actually a good thing.'' She said softly.''The clothes helped but so did my way of speaking. I called my master. It could have meant many things. A maid and a high lord. A man and his bodyguard. Even student and teacher. They labeled me maid but I lack a certain assertiveness that maids ir servants have. Hence the rumor was born I was a lady from another house. A forbidden love. Runaways. So many options.'' She actually liked the rumors thus far. They were harmless in this way.

"I suppose I can't blame them. I think I've done the same, and I'd probably be gullible enough to believe my first impressions." But before he could go on into any more thoughts, their food was served and he felt his stomach growl loudly.

"Wow, this all looks good," he went on, mouth watering and wasted on time in having a bite.

Silmeria smiled. ''Eat. Enjoy.'' she said and thanked those who had brought the food and drinks. They had placed a pot of herbal tea down too which Silmeria actually did not mind.

She buttered a piece of fresh, still warm bread and put on some scrambled eggs with bacon on it. She did eat almost lady like. Other then the few flaws of cutting the bread a bit to large. ''Eating like this... has been a long time.'' she said with a smile.

Blushing, Killian nodded.
"Yeah.. I know what you mean."
Though his mind thought back to the first date he had with Solita, and he felt his heart strings pull as his stomach tightened.

Silmeria observed him for a moment while she ate. ''We will leave tomorrow ok? By flight or on foot. We will get some rations too and extra medicine for you just in case. It is usefull to have some more medicine on me anyway.'' she said with a smile.

"Yeah... I feel like I've wasted too much time dawdling as his," he admitted, casting his eyes down to the table, shamefully.

Silmeria reached to his face and lifted it again gently. ''Do not look down. I can fly us remember? And I will. I am rather fast as well if I may say so myself. And you seem to have regained your strength which is good.''

''If the weather is bad, I will need to fly above the clouds for both our sakes. You do not need to worry about air or cold, I can engulf you in a protective aura''

she returned her hand and took another piece of buttered cinnamonbread.

Killian grit his teeth.
"I... If we're to be honest with one another, I don't think I'd feel comfortable flying. The highest I've ever been were the trees in our orchard."

''Then we'll walk. We can keep flying for another time then. And less high. I do hope to show you the sky at some point.''

She wondered if there were were horses they could buy. Or just one that could carry them both.''I am sure we can figure out something.

"I'm sure it's beautiful," he agreed. "I still have a hard time even imaging it all." He shook his head with a smile. "But don't worry. Like my mother always said, things have a way of working themselves out. I'm sure the path we take is the path we're destined."

But he couldn't help but let his thoughts drift back to what that crazy woman prattled off from earlier...
About Solita...
About the Grand Duke.
He frowned.

Destiny...

Certainly that was something she did not believe in since basicly she and her old Seer friend broke 'destiny' over and over again if it had not suited them. That idiot Kayden. If he had not died back there perhaps she would still had stayed with him. 'I choose your destiny' he had said with a smile before he had been quartered and his remains burned.

Silmeria looked at the frown and reached over with two hands. ''Alright Killian, looks like you need some facial molding and turn the frown upside down into a smile.'' she said as she placed both her hands on his face and gently rubbed and squeezed his cheeks while she was smiling warmly herself.

Killian could.not believe she just did that and after shaking his head to remove her hands, she'd see his face blushing something fierce.
"Wh... Frown upside down?" He couldn't help but wonder what brought on that childish, playful response.

Silmeria giggled having clearly enjoyed herself. ''Sorry. My foster mom always did that. Frowning was not allowed there so when I did, she would do that often to cheer me up. It usually ended up in a game of tickling'' she had retreated her hands and finished the last of her sweet cream bun.

After she finished her food and placed down her cutlery on the plate before finishing her drink and waited for Killian to finish too.

"Tickling? That sounds awful," he went on with a crooked smile. "Especially to me. I am rather ticklish."

''Don't worry so am I.'' she assured him. ''Being tickled is not so bad. Until it is done to the point you can not breathe. If someone says stop or has trouble breathing I do stop right away.

When Killian was done with eating she got on her feet and slung her bag over her shoulder. ''Come. Let us get some shopping done.'' she said with a smile. It did seem Silmeria was in a bit of high spirits.
It would be the tailor, and then armorer. Not that Killian's old armor was bad but it would perhaps be better if he had something neutral. Also with this cold, despite he would be with her metal armor would be a bad idea due to frostbite and that the moist in the air could make it rust.

The tailor shop was a nice distraction. Though perhaps it distracted him a tad too much, because as they were guided around to each type of clothe and the man asked what type of clothing his wife was looking for, he blushed and became tongue tied.

Silmeria giggled. ''We are not married.'' she said to the tailor in a kind tone.

Due to Killian's farmer background, she knew silk was most likely not his kind of thing. Despite her second cycle where she was basicly engulfed with expensive clothes, going from jutte, wool or simple linen to silk was not something she could get used to quickly.

But they could go for a good quality of linen and wool, which was also durable and provided enough warmth. Recalling how Killian responded when she told and showed him she was a user of magic, it was best to reduce her warm aura when she could.

''What kind of clothes would you actually like?'' she asked. ''Simple lined clothes existing out of a pair of pants, a tunic and vest or would you rather have something a bit more complex.''

Killian sighed, still feeling overwhelmed and red faced.
"I guess the simpler the better. And as long as it keeps me warm."

The tailor chuckled.
"Warm is all we can get away with selling in a place like this."

And Killian's expression turned sheepish.

Silmeria chuckled. ''I think then that the padded linen travelers clothing should be alright. With a warm cloak.''

''Should be do-able.'' the tailor said with a nod. ''Any specifics?''
''I think that a white longsleeve shirt, green vest with wooden oval or stave buttons and brown jacket with the wooden oval or stave buttons as well, combined with black pants should work.'' she suggested and looked at Killian to see if he'd agree or not.

Despite the clothing was simple, it was something that would make sure he'd stay warm. It would be more practical to wear, put on and take off.

After a moment, Killian realized she was speaking to him and blinked and came back to his senses.

"Y-yes." He nodded. "Whatever she says. We'll take it all."

Silmeria giggled. ''The set, times two please. We do however need to leave early the next morning.''
It was best to have two sets; if one would become dirty, Killian could change in the other so she could wash the filthy one.

The tailor pondered. ''Even I am not that fast but I will take the young Lord's measurements and I could adjust clothes I had already made.'' he looked at Killian. ''Could you follow me to the back for a moment please?'' he asked after picking up a measuring instrument from the counter.

Killian gave a nod and followed the man back. He felt awkward, and he knew he shouldn't but part of it had to be his anxiety. He was, after all, dreadfully worried for Solita. and it didn't help that he was caught up in this war- and barely a survivor of it. Part of him began to wonder that, if he didn't return to some post to confirm he was still alive after all that happened at Fort Dhagh....
Did that mean he could be accused of treason? He was still a soldier after all, and as the tailor went about measuring, he noticed how tense Killian was and gestured.

"Please, loosen your posture, or this measurement will be difficult to get."

It was at that request that Killian was broken from his thoughts. He gave a lame, half attempt at a smile.
"Oh,.. sorry." He tried to relax and gave another forced grin. "At least measuring my arms should be easy..." He went on, but it seemed the man didn't share in his attempt at a joke at Killian's own condition. The forced smile on the tailor could attest to that.

Whilest the tailor took Killian's measurements, Silmeria looked around for clothing she could perhaps get for herself. Something that for these weather conditions would be normal. She ended up picking a  simple silvergrey dress with a hood and white fur accents, brown cloak and high boots. Placing them on the counter.

Hopefully the tailor had the sizes of chosen clothing already somewhere in stock so he would only need to adjust the buttons and one sleeve. At the least that they could either pick it up tonight or really early in the morning. She looked outside for a moment at the frozen world. It would not be an easy trip that was for sure.

Killian soon joined her and sighed.
"Looks like it's snowing again."

Silmeria nodded. ''Seems like it..'' she said softly before her gaze went up to those dark clouds. It almost seemed like night. ''I do not think it will stop for a while either.''

''Do you wish to take this with you now mi-lady?'' the tailor asked refering to the clothes and boots Silmeria had placed on the counter. Silmeria nodded. ''Is there somewhere here where I can change into it?'' she asked.

The tailor gestured to the back and Silmeria paid for her clothes and a part of Killian's in advance. ''I will pay for the rest when I will pick it up at closing time.''

The tailor nodded and immediatly went to work after Silmeria went to the back to change. ''Warm clothes are indeed better then those thin scarce ones. Does she always dress like that? Even in this cold? She must be out of her mind.'' he muttered. Skillfully using a knife to cut the thread that held the current buttons so he could remove them, and could put the others on instead.

''Thank you for your time.'' Silmeria said after she returned, changed in the warmer clothing. The tailor who only nodded and waved but did not look up from sowing.

''Lets see for rations and then a horse. Or two. If we are lucky. I just hope they are winterbred.'' she said before opening the door allowing Killian to go out first.

------
Rations were not difficult to come by and most of what Sil choose was dried, including fruit, meat and vegetables. Other things she got were honey, rice and potatoes, and crackers. After a bit of negotiating she was able to get blackcurrent and strawberry marmelade.

The horses however were more difficult and came to an agreedment with a farmer she'd take one of the older winterbred horses after curing a younger one of its illness using her tears. Of course she was smart enough not to show anyone, and paid enough so the owner could buy three younger horses when the Winter would be over.

She did get the words that despite the horse being used to cold, its thick coat would perhaps not be enough with this weather.

If it would be the case and her own magic traits were not enough, she could always use the horse for meat.

---
The layer of snow had increased with several inches and windows had a good layer of frost by the time Killian and Silmeria were back at the inn. Walking had not been very easy and Silmeria wished that she could just melt all the snow away with one really good blast of heat. But she did not want to draw any unnessesary attention to herself or Killian, not to mention, if these people were against magic then it could just get really difficult.

The snow had clung to their clothes and the two were greeted by one of the innmaids having a tray with her holding two cups of hot herbal wine. ''Take a seat you two must be freezing!'' she said. Actually sounding worried.

Killian's teeth were chattering by the time they made it to the Inn, and even indoors, the howling winds rattled the shutters of the building, and a draft crept beneath the inn's large door. The fire flickered subtly when they entered, and once sat around it, Killian was thankful for the tea and a warm seat by the fire.

"Thank you." Accepting the tea, he blew on it lightly while pausing a moment to observe Silmeria through the foggy rising steam of his drink. With her cheeks pink and white hair askew from their travels, she had a pretty look to her- not that she wasn't completely drop dead gorgeous, but this made her appear more homely, more human and some how...
Not so out of his league.

He couldn't deny his attraction for her, and the fondness he had-
For he did owe her a lot, and by this time...
He had actually spent more time with Silmeria in the tundra than he had ever spent with Solita prior to. It was for this reason he was wondering why he felt this pull at him, this draw towards her as he found himself staring at her pink lips, and thinking back to his first kisses, how sweet they were- how times were innocent then...

And he thought about doing that,a nd so much more with Solita, and did not realize he might have given it away in the way he stared at her, eyes still glued to her lips.

Silmeria accepted the herbal wine as well. It was a non alcoholic drink (the wine having been heated for so long the alcohol had vaporised out of it) She put the cup to her lips and took a sip.

''Gods that tasted and felt good.'' She put her cup down for a moment to unhook her cloak and quickly took off Killian's as well before the snow would melt and drench his clothes. The innmaids took the cloaks and hang them after most of the snow had been removed so they could dry. Normally Silmeria would have done it herself but the girls insisted she needed to get warm at the fire after being outside for so long in these conditions.

''It has been a while since there had been such a cold Winter with this much snow in my life..'' Silmeria said as she removed some snow from her hair. Not wanting to to get wet. She could endure water for a while but just did not want to risk getting even just a little bit sick.

It was not until now though Silmeria noticed Killian had been staring at her. It actually made her cheeks redden a bit more.

He continued to stare, even as more of her skin was exposed. And though the gesture, innocent, he felt stirrings, primal, and fiery, begin to stir within him as he thought back to his view of her at the bath house.

''Are you alright Killian?'' Silmeria asked. Gently placing her hand on his forhead. Her touch was not really warm thistime compared to before. It was slightly warmer now then Killian's cold skin. ''Should we have gotten back earlier?..'' she asked.

She was not sure why he was staring at her like this. It was though a gaze she had seen more often but never understood or could really place it.

Killian blushed.
"Oh.. y-yeah, I'm just fine," he hastily replied. "I just... its... I guess shopping took a lot out of me." He gave a rigid shrug. "Who could have guessed?" His smile was forced. "Perhaps I should head up to the room first. Just to rest a bit and make sure the fire's going?" he suggested, moving to stand.

''Finish your drink first hun'' Silmeria said calmly. ''Wouldn't want the blood to rush to quickly to your head. You need to warm up properly.''

It actually counted for her as well since she gradually used less and less of her usual traits to keep warm so she would seem as human as she possibly could.

''Want to rest seperatly or together.''

At such a suggestion, Killian stood all the way up.
"Oh, you don't need to worry about me! See? I'm alright," he tried to give her a reassuring smile. "But I think I would like to rest a little by myself." He moved to pick up his tea. "Though I'll take this with me." And he paused, as if waiting to get her approval (because he was!). "Will that be okay?"

Silmeria nodded. ''Alright. Rest well. You can find me in my room if you need me ok? I'll wake you when it is time for dinner if you are not awake yet by then'' she said and gave Killian a soft kiss on his cheek and another on the forhead. ''If I am not in my room I am only gone to pick up your clothes.'' the horse could be picked up in the mornig when they left.

She would finish her drink here, get some rest and perhaps rearrange her bag a little. Depending on whether Killian would be awake or not.

He'd protest and wanted to help her with those chores, but he needed to go be by himself. And the second he was, he was glad for it. It'd been a while since he had urges, and to relieve it in private made him feel so much better. Though even as he lay in the after glow on his bed, he felt a bit guilty.

He knew he was having strong feelings for Silmeria, even stronger, more potent ones than those he had for Solita. With Solita... he had never considered bedding her.... It was just too far in the future and too animalistic of him to consider at the time.
Perhaps the war had change dhim. Because now? Now he wanted to become a man with Silmeria and wondered, idly, if they could- which wa sa thoguht that gave him no rest when he needed it and wanted it the worst.

So much for relieving himself. For his body might have been at some rest, his mind, however, was not.But he did his best and closed his eyes, hoping to at least try to get some of his thoughts tamed.

Silmeria had calmly finished her drink and was given another by an innmaid who joined her.

''Are you alright?'' she the girl asked the phoenix.

''Not sure. Just have this really heavy feeling in my stomach...''

''A lot of rumors about the two of you run through this town.''

''I know.'' Silmeria said with a chuckle and took a sip of the drink. ''I know too that they are all born here. I must say you girls have some wild fantasies.''

''We can't help it. Arriving with him the way you did... there is no town near and this Winter is cold and merciless. It is only natural for us to wonder how the both of you survived. Some are thinking it, others are saying it softly. Mages...''

''No need to worry about those things.'' Silmeria replied really softly. ''If either of us were really mages we would be a lot more secretive. I enjoy the rumors. Your wild imaginations are simply entertainment for me.''

''If not a mage then what are you two...''

''On a mission. Thigns just took a side turn.'' she cupped the girls face and brought her face really close to hers, gently to the point their lips almost met. ''Like I said. Best is not to worry about those things. Maybe we are mages, maybe we are not. If he and I had bad intentions then we would have already had done so.'' she released the maids face whom was heavily blushed. Had certainly thought that Silmeria was going to kiss her and was both happy and disappointed that it had not occured.

''We will be gone by the morning. I would really appreciate it at the least to forget the rumors that mages are here. Connlaothian people have Fae blood right? Deep down. People could be using magic without anyone knowing. This village is stable. Any raid or removal of people would only bring downfall.'' Silmeria got on her feet placing the now empty cup down and lifted the maid on her feet before she headed to her room.

By the time Silmeria returned, Killian had just stepped out of his room and froze in his place.
"Silmeria."
He hadn't expected to see her when he left. He wanted to get some fresh air, but seeing her after all of his thoughts were driving him crazy made his face turn pink.

''Hey'' Silmeria said with a gentle smile on her face. ''Feeling a little better? I was just about to order my bag before I would pick your clothes up.'' she noticed the change of color on Killian's face.

''Are you sure you are alright?...'' she gently cupped his head before placing her forhead against that of Killian. Now not using her magic at all to stay warm, her skin actually was just a little bit colder then his. Normal under these conditions. It actually now felt human.

''You feel warm... are you sure you are alright?'' she asked after withdrawing and released his face from her hands. ''If you feel up to it I could teach you how to use the bag...''

Completely flustered by the sudden close proximity Silmeria placed herself, his face turned even redder as he stammered, "B.. b... bag?"

''My enchanted bag? That holds your entire armor, all of my clothes, books, potions... and provisions'' Silmeria said softly. ''Would not want you to grab in it and reach into maggots and other nasty bugs right?''she asked.

''If you do not feel up to it and want to lay down a bit more then it is fine too and I will teach you after dinner.''

Grabbing maggots was a sober enough thought as he released a hot breath.
"Y-yeah. Maybe we should worry about that later? I.. I'm not sure I'm ready to learn."
And thinking about other things he could learn from her only made him feel hotter. He just hoped she wouldn't look down. There was an eager bulge coming from his pants.
He felt so awkward.

He had never been good around women. And even worse against the extremely attractive.

The phoenix nodded. ''Alright. I will sort my belongings a little then. Get a bit of sleep. Maybe it will do you good. If needed I will have medicine though if you get a fever again. I will keep my door open for you alright?'' she placed a gentle kiss on his cheek. ''Rest well and take it easy?'' she said as she briefly squeezed his hand and headed to her room after letting go of it.

In her room she immediatly lit a fire the non magic way. Being 'human' surely was cold if you were only used to being warm. She knew ways to warm up, the thought alone made her blood warmer. But engaging in sexual actions in the way she liked it required another person. And there was not one she figured would be available without causing trouble. Killian had Solita, and she did not know who of the innmaids was married. The male innkeeper was not her type, and Silmeria was not the one to do things herself. She took her bag and took out everything. Placing it all neatly on the floor. Some potions were perhaps outdated or spoiled. And there most likely were some forgotten things as well.

Though thankful they had parted ways, Killian hated the insanity that followed. Never before had his hormones been so dominate in all of his days. Angered at himself for even thinking so heated, he made his way back to his room and began to pace around, hoping that would get him exhausted enough that this 'fever' would break. But it only made him hotter, and he blind sided a nearby table, and found himself knocking over the vase, which smashed to the floor in a puddle of clay pieces and flowers.

Silmeria did not hear the vase fall and when she was done, she looked at all the things she had gathered over so many years. ''I should stop collecting things...'' she muttered to herself and looked at her and Killian's clothing.

Quickly she went downstairs, and requested a laundry tub with hot water so she could wash some clothes. It was given to her without question although the innmaid wondered how on earth Silmeria could carry the heavy thing by herself. It was even difficult with two people.

When back in her room she started to wash the blood off all the clothes and fixed Killian's armor where it was needed, and adjusted it so he could wear it in his current state.

The fire and her simple thoughts alone had been enough to warm herself up. Although she wondered how it was like to engage in sex again. She did like it in this form, with either a man or a woman. And it had been a long time ago. Usually though it was something she did after battle to get the lingering stress out of her or because battle was something that exited her if things had gone well. Either that or she was simply bored. It was not needed to love someone to make love, so to say.

She allowed the cleaned clothes to dry and started to sort out what things could be sold at the pawn shop and what she could keep.

When Killian was finally alone was he able to relieve himself, and in his moment of weakness he thought of nothing more than to claim Silmeria. What shame was it in just having a fantasy? And why was it he lusted for his new companion so? After he was spent, he lay on the bed, red cheeked and heated and though he felt relieved, he also felt shameful as he looked up at the ceiling and wondered how things like this ever came to be and turned on his side, wincing as he was still not used tothe wound where his arm used to be. It was still tender, and the pain sobered him as he lay there on his side, wishing he had just tried to sleep.

After sorting out what was no longer needed, Silmeria left her room still leaving everything out of the bag. Hesitated when she passed Killian's to see if he was awake but decided to let him be for now.

First she headed to a pawn shop where she sold what she could miss and then went to the tailor where she picked up Killian's new clothes. But she did not come back right away. There was barely anyone outside with the heavy snow and for a moment she wondered if she should just lay down on a roof. But with her barely using her magic to stay warm she figured it was a bad idea and took a short walk instead.

When coming back she once more was covered in pure white snow which she shook and rubbed off before heading back. It was almost time for dinner and she knocked on Killian's door.

But there was no response. He had actually fallen asleep.

Silmeria gently checked the door. It was not locked and as silent as a summer breeze she opened the door, entered the room and closed the door behind her. She smiled as she saw him sleep under the covers.

Noticing the fire was getting weaker she added a bit more wood after placing down the clothes and sat down on the stool. She did not feel like eating without Killian and she simply watched him sleep for a bit until it made her actually tired herself and allowed her head to rest on her arms on the table.

He didn't know she entered, but then again he was asleep as he softly moaned her name.

Hearing her name actually woke her up and with a smile she walked towards where Killian slept. Sitting down on the edge of the bed and gently caressed his face. She had noticed he acted a bit strange the past couple of hours. She wondered if it was because he knew what she was.

Little did she knew Killian saw her more as a woman then an animal.

It had crossed her mind to head to the grand duke's castle herself, alone and free Solita and perhaps others from there but she knew as well that it was something Killian had to do.

She looked a bit more at her friend's features and smiled before leaning forward and kissed his forhead. ''I'm here.'' she said softly when hearing him saying her name again.

And at the kiss, he released a heated breath, and his hands found hers as they gently gave them a squeeze.

She smiled warmly and gave his hands a gentle squeeze as well.  ' I wonder who will save who in the end..' she thought to herself. For now though she remained where she was and would until he would wake. But not without softly humming a few lullabies from long ago.

The song was sweet and comforting, and whatever thoughts ran through is mind were put to rest, as his breathing began to slow, and he drifted off to sleep once more.

With the passage of time, Silmeria grew tired herself and laid down beside him after partially disrobing. Usually spending time with someone who was sleepy made a person sleepy him or herself. Right now, just like before it was the same case. It would be wise for her to grab extra sleep too. Keeping watch was no easy thing do do in cold nights that were undoubtly laying ahead of them.

He sleep was restless, full of strange things that, were he awake, would make him greatly uncomfortable. Somehow, he found himself beneath a woman he could not see, and she was smiling- that much he knew. But there was another look to her eyes and he found himself naked beneath her. AN din that dream, his cock was so hard and the woman seemed to tease him, to beg him to have it.

The dream made him feverish in bed beside Silmeria, as he turned to her and a hand slipped across some of her exposed flesh. And half dreaming, he moaned a little when he moved forward, his erection jutting out from his clothes and pressing into Sil as he moaned some more at the contact.

Silmeria slept through it at first and when waking up the first thing she noticed was Killian being feverish. It was later when she felt something warm and hard against her leg and his hand at one of her curves. She slowly started to realise the reason of him being like this.

'Men will be men I suppose...' she thought to herself. She banished thoughts and memories of Erian away. He had been the last man she lain with. Killian was not Erian. The man she once loved was nothing but a memory now. She took a calm deep breath. A normal woman would've most likely responded different and Silmeria wondered if Killian saw her as a woman rather then someone else. She wondered if he still would after he saw her other form.

But sex was not the kind of fun she could have with him. She knew how humans viewed relationships and she did not want to ruin the one Killian had with Solita.
Not pushing him away though, instead she wrapped her arms around Killian gently and brought him close. ''I'm here...'' she whispered

Half asleep, he murmured in reply, "S-Solita..." he panted, and moved to pull her close, the sensation making his heart race. "I... I need you."

Silmeria kept Killian close. ''Killian...'' should she say she was not Solita? Attempting to wake Killian and pretend to be asleep to prevent anything awkward? She recalled bathing. Was it her fault perhaps for not realising those peeping holes so to say?

''You need to wake...'' Silmeria whispered softly in his ear. She could smell it clearly though; Killian's desire. Something that stirred the more animalistic side of her. But her mind was set on helping Killian and getting him and Solita together again. She would not defile that relationship.

"Nmmm.." Killian's face scrunched as the words tickled him. That voice...
"Sil?"

''Yes Killian. It is Silmeria here. You're dreaming.'' Silmeria whispered. She had her eyes closed and the way she held him was soft and gentle as if sleeping.
Figuring that in the way Killian's physical condition was now, would be best to stay pretentious of being asleep herself.

''You feel as if you have a raging fever... you should wake.''

"Fever? I... wha-" But when he stirred, he ended up rolling into her, his crotch pressing into hers and his eyes widening as he hadn't realized just how close they were. THeir lips nearly touched.

Unintented a moan left Silmeria's lips as Killian's hard cock touched some sensitive parts.

Silmeria could no longer pretend to be asleep but certainly pretend she would now wake.
''Killian...'' she spoke softly. Her eyes opened but she did not need to see him to know how close he was. She had felt his breath on her skin. ''What's going on... are you alright?'' she asked.

Her cheeks were a bit flushed and his scent was somewhat intoxicating. But that side would not win now. ''You were a bit feverish so to make sure you were warm enough I joined you ... I hope it is not something bad...''

He had no idea how it happened. Perhaps it was the way she looked, the way she felt, and the true fever in his blood, but his lips moved towards her as if they were magnetized, and once they were sealed- the heat took over.

She'd feel him moaning through their kisses, his body moving to grind into hers as he pulled her against him, unable to think of anything but what his body craved.

Silmeria was not sure if this was good or bad. She answered his kisses and whispered his name. It was not all she wanted to say. 'Solita... what about her?' she thought although she could somehow not say them.

The scent of lust increased and she seemed to drown in it. A part, large part of her actually longed for intimacy again and she felt her own body warm up as it started to crave for more due to the kisses and moans left her lips. The only thing preventing Killian's length from entering her was the fact she had her underwear on. Even so at this rate, Killian could certainly feel the effects he started to have on her now as her nipples started to harden and her inner thighs started to get wet. ''Is it truely ok?...'' she spoke in a breathless whisper.

Killian had no idea what he was doing. He had never done this before, never had the chance. He had always been too scared to get near a woman in this way. Perhaps it was why now that the opportunity was happening, he had no idea what to do but react.

Despite the fact both were still wearing undergarments to keep themselves from a union, the way Killian was grinding against her, it allowed for him to poke into her sex, causing hers to get soaking wet as he pushed them into her while he could feel her heat through his own.

"Ansgar's name," he panted, not even knowing what he was doing. "I want you so bad."

Silmeria released another moan and gently held Killian's face in his hands kissing him passionatly running her tongue over his lips to encourage him to open his mouth. When he had she brushed her tongue against his for a moment before parting their faces.

''We should get rid of something if you want me'' she whispered and descended her hands to where his underwear was, losing their bindings.

The animal had won even in the far distance of her mind the question lingered if she could truely do this while Killian loved Solita. Still. She was to far into it now to pull back as she joined their mouths again.

The request to remove his clothing sent him over the edge as he fumbled to remove them.
Blushing, he confessed, "Gods.. I've never done this before." And even still, he'd never revealed himself to a woman, and soon his only clothing keeping him modest was removed, and his cock stood at attention, swollen and the tip glistening with precum as it twitched in anticipation and his eyes strayed to what lay between her legs. He saw that was int he way, protecting him from seeing a woman's sex for the first time.

He hesitated.
"May I remove them?" he asked, and held his breath as he waited for her answer.

''You may'' Silmeria whispered huskily as she tossed his aside. ''Do not worry for not having done this before.''

Before he did though she took a gentle hold of Killian's manhood and started to gently pulling it. She would maybe not be able to let him feel everything. After all. Sex had many ways. But whatever she would do, she would explore what he liked and also important, did not like.

But he couldn't help but worry. He had never seen a woman like this, except for the show in the bath. And as his eyes took her in, he had no idea where to begin. But his fingers fumbled at the laces, wondering if he should unbind them first. But the second her hand grabbed his cock, he gasped. But that intake of breath soon curdled into a moan as his eyes fluttered close at the sensation of a woman touching him for the first time.

With her other hand, Silmeria helped Killian to unlace one side of her underwear which existed out of two halves each side having laces on the sides.

If Killian would touch her there he would feel her flesh was wet. But she was not done yet. ''You can touch where you want. You will know if it feels good or not'' She said  and removed her top herself exposing her breasts and hard nipples. She kept pulling him and then used the palm of her hand to gently rub the tip, not caring her hand became moist with precum.

His sex kept twitching and pulsating at her attentions. Her hands were so soft, skilled. He could barely think, and the moment he saw her sex, and then breasts- she'd feel his cock become even more eager as it throbbed hard.

"By the Gods.." he breathed. "You're beautiful."
And though she said he could touch, he had no idea where to even begin. So his hands hesitantly moved down to the skin of her inner thigh, but his eyes lingered to her breasts, which he found himself drawn towards. And soon his lips were kissing them, gently at first as his hand blindly fumbled between her legs. It was when he felt something hot and wet that he gasped. He had no idea what it was, but when he pulled away to look at his moist fingers, then down at her moist sex- things began to make sense from all of the dirty bar talk he used to hear from other men.

"You're wet."

When he touched and kissed her, Silmeria released pleasurable moans. Gods it had been long since she was touched like this. ''When aroused, women get wet.'' She said calm. ''Just as natural as men getting rockhard''

Her cheeks were reddened and despite their forplay had not been long, her body was ready. But it would perhaps be a shame to let him enter already. ''Lay on your back and close your eyes'' she whispered.

"I.. I've never done this before. But er.. am I supposed to be laying down?" he asked, heated, confused, but even still.. he obeyed.

''Depends. There are many ways to do this. And they all feel different.'' Silmeria replied as she moved some stray hairs from her face, moving them behind her ears. ''I just wanted to do this.'' she lowered herself and took Killian's hot hard cock in her mouth.

She made sure to pay attention not to let him climax yet though. She would not let him. Most men after all could only climax once in a short time.

Having no idea what he was in for, Killian gasped and shot up the moment her mouth wrapped around his cock.
"What are you-"
But his own words were snuffed out by a moan as his eyes rolled so far back into his head he swore he was seeing his brains.

"An...Angsar's name!" a hand clutched at her hair and he just held it there at the back of her head.
Never had he dreamed of doing this. And the feeling...
it made him shiver.

She went on for a little while. Moving her head up and down. Moved her tongue against the shaft and occasionally when she took his length out of her mouth, she'd gently lick the tip. The taste of him making her desire even more. ''Do tell me when I do something you do not like.'' she said as she sat down on his upper legs. Massaging his loins gently with her hands before placing kisses on his stomach and chest, gently sucking each of his nipples before making her way to his neck.

All the Gods in heaven, the second she stopped he was stunned. Part of him feared he was going to peak in her mouth and by the Gods- how rude would that be!? He had no idea the complexity (or simplicity) of receiving oral sex; but the tension that had been festering over the course of the last week or so he'd known her had gotten out of control.

He only came back to the present when he felt her giving attention to his body, and soon realized his own hands had strayed to hers, smoothing over any and all soft skin he found as his cock remained tall, swollen and twitching eagerly for entry.

He peered at her with husky eyes, a hand moving to part her hair from her face.
"Gods.. Silmeria..."
What words could he use? All he could think of was he had to have sex with her now. His hips bucked up needingly, his dick prodding at her legs, looking for the right spot while hands continued to hungrily devour her sinful skin.

She figured she had let him wait long enough and repositioned herself. With one hand she held his cock and her entrace was just above it. She lowered herself a little first till the point the tip of Killians hard length was barely touching her soft wet flesh but then lowered herself more letting him enter her. Gods it felt good and another moan left her lips.

Words, breath, thoughts all escaped him.
Perhaps I died and this is how heaven feels.
The sensations were indescribable, or maybe he was just bad with words. But to feel his sex slip within her's nice and slow, was a sensation that nearly made him peak.

"S.. Silmeria!" The words finally were gasped through his mouth, which remained open in awe.
"Gods in the heavens..." He shuddered, bringing his hands to her hips as he felt her slip in even further, until he felt her sitting on him- and knew he was all in her, filling her up and was soon whimpering at the idea.
"Gods.. Silmeria."

Shuddering again, he couldn't think of what to do. But he didn't have to. His body knew. And soon, his hips began to move up inside her, hesitant and slow. But each slow motion he took in stride, feeling every inch of her as he did so.

She was so hot.. so wet... so soft. Not to mention she fit him like a glove.

'' K-Killian..'' she moaned soft as she too following his rhytm and wordless pleasurable moans left her mouth. With each move her breasts moved too and her womanhood got even wetter. She took a hold of his hand bringing it to her mouth and licked each of his fingers before guiding it to one of her breasts.

If anybody would hear them, she surely did not care. She put one hand underneath the shoulder on the side  that still had the arm and encouraged him to sit up.

Not knowing if he could sit up, considering any sudden movement or new sensation made him nearly cum inside her (and for some reason, he felt embarrassed to), he tried it anyway,a nd found himself holding her for just a moment as their bodies seemed to press all over, and this new angle made him shiver as he was hitting all new angles.

Moans of pleasure left Silmeria's lips. It being Killian's first time or not he felt good and her arms wrapped around him before she let her mouth join his once more. The fire in the fireplace burned more intensely but did not heat up the room to an unbearable state.

''Killian... you feel amazing..'' she panted softly between the kisses.

To have her praise him so made him moan and grunt as he paused.
"So... so do you," he said, feeling his heart pounding as his dick throbbed inside her. He wasn't sure how much he could take,- or if it was even appropriate to let himself just go inside her. It would be quite the mess.

Her moans intensified as she started to reach her climax soon. She broke their kiss only to place soft suckles in his neck towards his ear. ''You can.. release inside if you want to..'' she moaned softly in his ear as she let her nails gently scratch his back.

Killian shivered despite the words being spoken boldly and upon a hot breath against his ear. He released a whimpering moan.

"But I..." But he couldn't find the right words to say, and his dick simply throbbed within her, eager to continue. Eager to reach it's peak.

''It's alright'' Silmeria whispered huskily. She felt she was going to climax soon but wanted to wait a bit longer if she could. Wanting to cum when Killian did. Feeling him so deep, hitting all those spots had filled her with lust and maybe she wanted even more. Feel him more and longer.

''Killian... I'm... close..'' she moaned before pressing her lips on hers again and let her tongue play with his.

Hunger and desire over came him as his lips locked to hers. His hand moved lower, resting at the small of her back before he moved to lay her beneath him and managed to hold himself up with just that last limb, and before he knew it, he was pounding into her, harder and harder as their lips continued to meet and their tongues entangled.

Silmeria did not mind the change of position and wrapped her legs around him. She moved with him, her moans becoming quicker but her mouth did not leave his. Even when she came, making her wetter and her muscles giving Killian's limb a gentle squeeze, she kept going. She wanted to feel all of him.

And soon feel all of him she did. Positioned over her, he took complete control; and lost his mind to the passion, slamming his dick into her hard with need. And as he neared his peak, he felt her tense up and their kisses became muffled, and soon he pulled his lips away and was screaming as he shot his hot seed inside her and soon collapsed ontop of her body with a shudder.

"G.. Gods..." he moaned.

Silmeria relaxed her body aside from her arms which she wrapped around Killian. She still panted. ''Gods indeed..'' she said softly.  ''That was... amazing.. you were... amazing'' her voice sounded a little melodic.

She could still feel him throbbing inside of her and if his own body could she would not say no to another round but men, mostly were only able to climax once and then needed a break.

She placed a kiss in his neck and held him close.

Too tired to care how awkward he might be laying overtop of her, and that his member was still buried inside her, he took a moment to simply catch his breath as he panted, "You.. you were amazing, too."

Silmeria gave him a slow passionate kiss. She felt her muscles still occasionally squeezed tighter before relaxing again around Killian's cock and made her moan softly still. She still felt hot inside and could not seem to get rid of that feeling just yet. The heat she felt was not just from herself though. Killian's hot cum was inside of her and his cock was still hot too. Still feeling it inside of her felt good somehow.

''I would go for another round even if you could but most men need to wait a bit after they came. Her breath was almost back to normal.

"M-more?" He couldn't believe the idea of doing more after what they had already done. BUt even though he was spent, the very idea of her still hungry for him made his cock inside her quiver and remain hard.

''If it does not hurt, or not to sensitive.'' she gave his cock a full gentle queeze with her inner muscles as she took control of them.

''You are still hard. But if it does not feel good anymore then we can stop.'' she assured him. With one hand she traced his shoulder, and arm and entwined their fingers while with her other hand she traced his head, neck, back and ass. Her body move a little and another moan left her lips. She waited for confirmination from Killian however. Looking at him with alluring eyes. Her whole expression revealed she wanted more. They were no longer blue either but a passionate red instead.

''So many ways this can be done. From staying the way we now are to even standing or me being on my belly instead.'' she spoke a little as if in a trance. ''And it all, feels different.''

"Sensitive?" he shivered. Of course he was sensitive, it's what got him here in the first place! But the way she spoke, the ideas she invoked...
He felt the rest of his body warm.

"How.. how many ways?"he found himself asking, curious, yet still shy, despite their bodies being locked. And again, his dick quivered.

''Unlimited.'' Silmeria replied softly. ''Things can be tried out. Discovered. That is how you find out what you like, and what the partner likes. Fingers and mouth can be used. It can be gentle or rough. Be straight to the point, or a long forplay.'' she closed her face in on his neck. Gods he smelled alluring and Silmeria soon found herself nibbling on the skin in his neck.

At her reply, he released a breath he hadn't known he was holding. And as she went on to explain, he felt himself becoming increasingly heated. But before he could even answer her, his eyes rolled back as he closed them and moaned while she nibbled at his neck.

After a time, he found himself whimpering, "I.. I wouldn't even know what to suggest.. or where to begin."

With her free hand Silmeria scratched his back gently. ''I like it like this too though'' she said as she moved her hipsgently and broke the kiss so she could look at him. ''Because I can look at you..'' her rhytm was slow and Killians cock hit her deep inside. Stimulating the g-spot.

''Do not think. You pushed me on my back too. It is fine to act on impulses like that. Slowly her movements became faster until she slowed down again and stopped. Shifting so Killian exited her and she got on all fours.

''Suggest whatever comes to mind. What makes you curous. Even stories you had heard''

Killian stared at her body for a long, hungered moment before moving forward as he got to his knees. His hands moved to her hips, and as he moved forward, he felt the length of his shaft stroke down the moist folds of her sex. He shivered and closed his eyes before moving just so until he slipped inside her once again.

''aaAAAH!''  The moan of pleasure left her mouth and Silmeria was certain she was dripping some of their lovemaking juices on the sheets.''Y-you feel so hot... a-amazing'' she moaned of pure delight.

''Killian... take me as hard and long as you please. I am all yours.'' As she said this she already started to move her hips a bit.

Killian whimpered a groan, hands gripping heartier to her hips as his own picked up speed. Soon he was driving into her so hard and full of need, his body was slapping, hard, against hers.

"Gods... Silmeria..."

Was it true? Was she all his? The very idea made his entire body flush as he shuddered and just let his body work her, harder and harder.

Every thrust basicly sounded like a slap as he took her quite hard but she released a moan of pure pleasure with each and every one of them.

''Killian...it feels... so... so...good... don't stop..'' Silmeria pleaded between her moans quickly feeling the familiar tension build up again

Soon he couldn't handle it, his body jerking in response as he filled her with his hot seed. He rested his face against the back of her neck and shivered.

''K-Killian... I'm cumming... I'm cumming... Killian!'' She moaned and called out his name a third time when she came, which happed as she felt more of his hot seed being shot inside of her. Feeling it against her inner walls deep inside of her. Soon her arms and legs could no longer keer her on all fours and she collapsed on top of the bed on the sheets which now most likely were wet from their sweat and love juices.

She still felt Killian on top of her but did not find him heavy. She felt him shiver. It could not be from the cold though obviously. So must have been because of his releases.

Her panting turned into calm long breaths. Oh how much had she missed this feeling without knowing it. And Killian despite it being his first time with a woman managed to climax twice.''Killian...''she whispered softly.''again you were... amazing...''

He collapsed beside her on the bed, his heart beating so hard he could hear it inside his ears, nearly deafening him. He felt so hot, so sticky with sweat, but he didn't care. He was well spent, barely an ounce of energy left as his eye lids slowly closed and he moaned gently through closed lips.

He didn't even know what to say, but for the moment, simply enjoyed the glowing feeling of the aftermath of their love.

Silmeria turned on her sidevand gave a soft tender kiss on his lips before pulling him in an embrace. She was sticky with sweat and between her legs she could feel some of their hot sex juices.

With the heat over though, she started to realise something again. Solita. And although not visable in her expression she realised that maybe what they had done was wrong. She shoukdve had stopped Killian. But her own heat and animal sude took over so quickly.

She hoped though Killian would not regret it. Would he be mad at her?

He could have fallen asleep right then and there, but her soft kiss roused him, in which he returned. But after a moment, he opened his eyes a little and studied her.
"Is something wrong?"
Despite her silence, he could see the subtle worry in her eyes.

Silmeria shook her head lightly. Glad she could be a formiddable liar.

''Everything is fine.'' She whispered.''I just dont think I have the strength to go downstairs for dinner.'' This was true, she felt extremely satisfied and tired physically.

''I hope I was not to demanding or pushy though... I am actualky not the type who demands things during sex...''

Killian blushed and moved to kiss her lips.
"Why are you apologizing?" He paused, eyes warm. "What we did... It really was amazing."

Solita was most likely not in Killian's head yet and Silmeria hoped that Killian would not regret it when she would be in his head again.

''That it was.'' Silmeria replied and kissed him back. Regret slipped away for now since Killian seemed so blissfull and so... warm. She rarely had that feeling with persons she had sex with.

''And you know what... it does not even have to be the first and last time...''

Even Silmeria wondered where that suggestion came from. She kissed him, slowly and passionatly. Again brushing her tongue against his. It was different then before when it was faster and rougher. ''How about we get some rest. Tomorrow we will quickly clean ourselves up.'' she suggested.

At her comment, and the kiss, a heat of excitement tickled through his blood. But he was too excited to act on it and gave a sleepy nod. But at the idea of cleaning up, he couldn't help but smirk and found himself holding her closer as he kissed her again.

After a short while Silmeria broke the kiss before her own body would lose itself in passion and lust again and pulled the covers over them. She did not even feel like puting sleepwear on and she could keep Killian warm anyway.

''We should wake up before dawn though and try to leave at sunrise or not to long after.'' she whispered. Placing a kiss on his forhead. Sleeping well would most likely not be a problem for either of them now however.

Killian closed his eyes and whimpered slightly. He didn't want to think about reality as he groaned, "I wish I could just stay here int his place forever."
This place.. so untouched by war...
and so perfect he had nearly forgotten about his other plight-

Until he recalled Solita, and a stone of guilt filled his belly as he went rigid at her side.

Silmeria only heard Killian vaguely though before she had fallen asleep. Her expression was calmer then usual it seemed as well. Maybe almost childlike who was safe after a very long time.

The phoenix woke up about two hours before dawn but felt well rested. And once more guilty about last night. She wondered if Killian felt guilty too and how the man would cope.

He felt surprisingly relaxed, and found himself laying in the bed for a good long while, digesting the entire situation at hand. Silmeria was still at his side, both warm and close within the bed. And they had shared much more than that, which made his morning wood ache for more reasons than the ordinary one. But his mind drifted back to Solita- and though the guilt was there-
he had to wonder...
Did this moment.. did this shared bed mean he and Silmeria...
were now lovers?

Slowly Silmeria's eyes opened and she smiled when she saw Killian. Placing her hand on the side of his face. ''Hey..'' she whispered softly. ''Did you sleep well?'' she asked before slowly sitting up. The blanket slid off her partly exposing her breasts but she did not seem bothered by that fact.

She felt her thighs were sticky, for obvious reasons.

Silmeria desptie feeling guilt though was not sure yet if she regretted last night.

Killian felt his ears and cheeks heat at his blue eyes could not be swayed from taking in her near naked form. The sheet did a terrible job at hiding anything- but then again, he had seen and tasted all of her last night.

His blush grew when he was finally able to tear his eyes away.

"Y-yes... surprisingly so. It.. it's been such a long time since I had a good night's sleep at all," he confessed, feeling a bit shameful he was still tongue tied around her. All things considered, he must have done something right to get here.

''No need to stutter you know... you've seen all of me, yet experienced just a small part of it.'' Silmeria said with a mischievous smile.

''Still though... I... can not help but to feel somewhat guilty as well... you are in a relationship with someone who means the world to you and yet... I could not restrain myself one bit. I suppose that is the downside of being an animal. And a passionate one at that...''

Killian's face burned more at her reminder. He dropped his gaze.
"I...." but what could he say?

''I do not know what it will mean for you and me in the future... if you're angry at me I get it. But if you do not regret it, neither will I. It will mainly be up to you though how things will go between you and me.'' she got out of bed and put on something easy and decent although her other set of clothes was ready. Killian's new set was ready as well.

''We should both take a bath. No telling when our next chance will be.''

Though his gaze was dropped, at her suggestion, he gasped and looked up into her face.
"Angry? N-no, I just... I..."
Again, words were so lost to him and the frustration was building. He dropped his gaze and wilted, guiltily as he sighed.

"I guess I'm just... confused," he murmured softly, staring down at the floor. Though he knew she was decent, he wasn't sure what to call this moment. Perhaps it was weakness, but a part of him did yearn for Silmeria. But, as she had reminded him...
What of Solita? And the pain in his chest tightened.

''I've been meaning to ask. No need to answer if you do not want to. How long do you know Solita. How much time have you actually spent with her?'' she asked and raised his chin before giving him something easy to wear for the short trip to the baths.

Killian went quiet before turning to Silmeria.
"How long?" he frowned, mind jumbled. "I... Couldn't say. A few months maybe?"

''Maybe?'' Silmeria said with a chuckle but then looked at him again. Calm and more serious. ''She is your first love isn't she. A good and pure thing. Although the following I'm saying will not count for everyone though. Love is neither true or a lie. But what is important is how you feel towards a person and act on that. With consent of course. There are not a lot of people who can stay with the person they had fallen in love with. Feelings change by multiple reasons. I think what will be good for you is to consider what kind of feeling she gives you. And maybe... I should be well. More decent. I think I've not really made it easy for you either the past several days...''

Killian thought over what she had said. Worry and doubt were there, but he realized something from her words as he turned to her.
"How do you feel?" he asked, seeking her eyes. "About me... about... this?"

''How I feel?...'' Silmeria asked. She had readied her bags, planning to take them with her to the baths so she would not have to return to the room.

''..I... did not mind it. I will not have regrets if you wont have any either. As for how I feel about you. I'm not sure. I like being around you and the fact you accept what I am and still treat me like before... makes me happy. To be blunt I wont mind sex with you more often but there is someone you love so from a moral point, I know it is wrong as well.''

Such a response didn't quell any emotions, but more stirred them around. Internally, it was frustrating. He sighed and dropped his gaze.

"Wrong... yes...I wouldn't feel such harsh guilt if it weren't." His frown deepened before he looked at her. "But I suppose this.... isn't love... I guess." ANd that made him frown all the more.

''There are countless types of love out there and they can be expressed in various ways too. What we did last night was not really emotionless or loveless. We just need to find out at what place the feelings we have for one another belong to.''

She slung her bag over her shoulder. ''Some relationships are merely for sex. Other relationships are love based. Do not decide things to quickly. I recommend starting at what Solita is for you. You had not known her for that long yet. Is she more like a sister? Is she someone you wish to spend the rest of your days with? If so in what way. Love, is really complicated sometimes.''

Killian stared at Silmeria for a long time before dropping his gaze to the floor.

"Solita she.... I.... I could hear wedding bells with her.. dreamed of stumbling down the aisle.."
He laughed in spite of himself, but it hurt, and he felt his eyes prickle with tears.

''Wedding bells so soon huh.'' Silmeria said calmly and walked over to Killian. Lifting up his chin. ''Then let's wash up and go. We'll have plenty of miles to cross.'' she walked towards the door and opened it softly.

She did not bathe very long but she certainly made sure that everything was clean and no longer sticky. After bathing all they had to do was pick up the bread and horses since they already had everything else.

Still. She wondered what Solita would think of Killian. Wether she could hear the weddingbells like he had. It was not as if they knew one another long and she was Killian's first love. She wondered if he was her first.

But seeing her reaction...
Killian hadn't the strength to get up and just... go. He felt crushed, an dheart broken in two directions. He lowered his eyes, ashamed.

"Is... is this... that... easy to just... forget?"

She was his first... the first woman he lusted for-
and for all he knew...
What if this was love?

''You should never forget it. Neither denying it happened. Be honest with yourself and to her. If it eats at you to much I could perhaps wipe a part of your memories with magic but it is not permanent. Do not be to hard on yourself though alright? You've been through enough''

He could have cried, and bitterly, he stared down at the healing stump that had once been his arm.

"A lot has happened... changed."
They say war changes a man...
He had no idea how true it was.

''Things always will change Killian. People get exposed to various situations which makes them do so. Either for the better or for the worse.'' she sat down beside him and brought him close to her in an embrace. ''I'll block it from your memories if you wish me to do so. It will slowly slip back over the duration of two till three weeks. I never actually fully remove memories since I find them important to have. The good and the bad. But the choice wether you want me to do this or not will be yours.''

She placed a kiss on his forhead. ''And war... changes a person the most. If I'd not been exposed to so many death and wars in my life I would've been a completely different person. But you must not allow it to get a hold of you. If it does, it will destroy you.''

Killian look horrified at such an idea, and also grief stricken as Silmeria continued to speak.

"No.." he went on, shaking his head and moving back just enough from her embrace to look into her eyes. "Those memories.... they're our memories and good or bad..." He continued to shake his head. "I'd never ask to be rid of them."

But then he hung his head in shame.

"I... think I just need to sort this out myself."

''Alright.'' Silmeria replied and distanced himself again from Killian by walking to the door. ''Come. We need to go.''

She lead him to the baths in silence so both could clean up. Especially nessesary for her. Sex was good despite this time it had a bitter aftertaste but it was a messy thing. She washed her original clothes first and dried them with her magic before puting them away since she would be wearing something more appropiate.

Fortunatly she had paid everything in advance and what she had given was actually enough to stay for a month but money mattered little to her.

When bathing was finished they went to pick up the horses and as final stop, the baker and by the time the sun showed itself from beyond the horizon, the two headed out of the town. Silmeria had not said a word to Killian actually since the bedroom. She was actually just not sure what to say

"You've been quiet for a long while, Silmeria," Killian began, keeping pace with her as they traveled. "I hope I didn't upset you.... With, you know... Worrying over Solita and er.... about us and what... what had happened." Though it was still chilly, his cheeks still burned with a blush. But he didn't want to leave things awkward between them. So he moved in a way so she could see him.

"You know when you offered to erase my memories? I know I was horrified.... I don't even think I could consider such a thing..... Silmeria... You.. I.. I can't deny you mean something to me, and something great. But I..... I guess my heart is still torn because of Solita and I..."

He was pretty sure his fumbling words weren't helping.

''You did not upset me... it is just... that I was not able to stop myself with you. Most of the time I had intercourse with someone, it was purely for relief of stress or when my body had gotten exited after a heavy battle and needed a way to get rid of it. Before you ask, yes. A good exiting battle does that to a person. I am not sure what it was that made me incapable of stopping. Especially after I had decided to never love again. I'm just a bit confused regarding my own motives.'' Silmeria admitted.

''you are a really good person. I suppose I am just afraid I ruined something I should'nt have. The erasing of memories would've only been a temporary thing. Slowly they would've come back to you. It is a useful trick if someone experienced a lot of trauma and are not able to face it all at the same time.''

She looked at Killian with a weak smile. ''If you do not forgive me for what happened last night I get it. I am actually not forgiving myself either.''

After such a long winded ordeal, Killian sighed but returned her weak smile with one of his own.

"I think we both need to stop apologizing... I.. well, we both made the choice and well... I'm sure we'll figure this out."
Angsar willing.

Silmeria nodded. ''I'm sure we can do that.'' she said before looking forward again.

''So... I've been alive for 1400 years, give or take. Aything you'd like to know about me? Questions perhaps? You can ask me anything you like.''

Killian did a double take.
"Woah, wait... fourteen hundred years!?" And it was hard to pick up his jaw after it had dropped. "Wait.. are.. are you serious?"

''Yes I am.'' Silmeria said with a giggle. ''I live in cycles though. But in total I lived about that long thus far. My strength, lifespam and the like, I am not much different then a Dragon regarding that.''

"How.." He blinked. "How do you even keep track?"

''Well, my life has basicly been in cycles. I enter a new one each time my rebirth cycle kicks in. Those are not so difficult to keep up with and I just count those together which aproxematly makes 1400 years. My first only took about 70, second was 375, third was 200, fourth lasted for 350 and I am currently in my... 417th year of my fifth cycle.'' she explained. ''I do not know how many cycles I have left though but I will know when it is my last. When thatone is over I do not know what will happen. I never met my parents or another phoenix so. It will be a wait and see.''

Killian studied her curiously.
"Have you ever wanted to know more about your kind? Like.. did you ever consider trying to search for your parents? Or another phoenix?"

''I tried finding them and looked in many places. Even other planets. But nothing. None in the sky or on land. My parents were not there when I got out of my egg either. I was alone.'' She admitted.''Bless natural instinct for keeping myself alive.'' She giggled at the memories of hunting rats and other creatures for food. She had gotten over the fact of never meeting her parents a long time ago and she had great adoptive ones.

Killian blinked.
"Egg?" And then he found himself sighing through a smile. "I... guess it's still odd to me. All I can see is a beautiful woman... so imagining you being born from an egg..." He shook his head at the idea. "It's kind of like a fairy tale."

Silmeria chuckled.''I could morph and show you.'' She spoke on a tone which made it hard to determine wether she was serious or joking.''My human form and elven form are basicly to let blend in. But indeed I originally come from an egg. Not a usual one though. It is more like a large eggshaped fireopal, six times.as large as one of my hands. When held against the light though you can see something inside.''

Still having a hard time wrapping it around his head, he had to ask, "How can to you recall all of that? I mean... I can barely recall anything when I was five, let alone an infant."

''I suppose animals have a different way regarding remembering things. I of course do not remember every person I ever encountered but I remember everything that mattered. And everything that mattered. Some things a little bit more clear then others. Other then being born alone and having to fend for myself from day one and dying by the hands of a dragon I remember little from my first cycle.''

"A.. A dragon? Did... It... It didn't eat you, did it?"

''No no it did not eat me. I was not the phoenix I am now back then. Due to not being able to morph that well like I can do now caused that I had been attacked and hunted down often by humans so I saw them as my enemy. I loathed them for killing basicly everything that was not one of their own and they were often at war with one another as well. They destroyed everything. To prevent they would actually kill me I started to hunt on them. Eating them too now I think of it. settlements which were to close to my nest and I plucked travelers from the ground. Me killing their lifestock for food did not give me a good reputation either so eventually a dragon with it's rider took on a contract to slay me. It was a good fight though and we had wounded one another pretty bad. I teared one of it's wings before fleeing and died of my wounds a few days later.'' she sighed softly although did not seem to mind talking about it at all.

''I am not sure wether I should regret what I have done. I will not fall back into that predatory type again but humans 1400 years ago... really were not a lot of fun to be around with.''

"I.. I couldn't even begin to imagine. I'm.. sorry to hear about that, Sil." he told her as he placed a gentle hand to her shoulder. "Though, I wouldn't blame you for still hating humans," he went on, giving her a small, lopsided grin. "They don't seem much better 1400 years later."

''Yes and no. Actually many of you are quite gentle and understanding. Humans have a reason to hate creatures such as me too. Dragons are not exactly always friendly either. I can sort of compare myself to those oversized lizzards. Both they and me are actually predators. We hunt, are not exactly small... so of course we strike fear in people's hearts if we land in front of them or pick up one of their cows. Although...'' she chuckled.

''The most amusing thing was that when I was in my natural form drinking water from a lake and some group of hunters discussed how they would pluck my feathers and sell them. Their mentioned methods were really amusing but nothing beats the look on their face when they realised I could talk. I turned myself into my elven form then and  all of a sudden they started to plead calling me the nyph of fire and that they were unworthy.''

Killian smiled warmly.
"Can't say I have any stories to top that. Then again, I can't claim to have any feathers."

''Oh plenty of people went for human trophies not to worry about that.'' Silmeria replied. ''Just glad it is not as much as it used to be. Cannibalistic tribes and the like. Yuck.''

Her gaze went to the sky. It seemed to be clearing up which was both good and bad. Good due to the fact there would be no new snowfall for the time being. Bad because it would cause the temperature to drop. The wintersun felt good though. She just had to make sure that the horses and Killian would not freeze. There was fabric around the horses legs to prevent them from freezing up at the least.

"Cannibals?" he shivered at the thought. "Still.. I can't imagine what they'd use as a trophy... though I've heard stories some Adelan tribes put the heads of the men they've killed on spikes at the front of their village." He cringed as he thought about it actually being real. "I never wanted to even believe something that bad actually existed."

''The more you believe that exists the less it catches you off guard when you see it. If you truely believe it that is. Those who hunt elves for sport take the eyes and ears. And that is by far not even the worst thing I've seen. But also people do seem to become more civilised and those kinds of weird cruely are seen less and less. Does not mean it is no longer around though. Every creature has it's way for doing things. With humans it just tends to vary. Even I collect things. Weapons, artifacts from old times, ancient tomes, preciousgemstones and jewelery. Come to think of it I still have not made sure you can take things out of my bag. We can do that when we make camp.''

Killian went quiet. He thought about what she said, and thought about his own place in this world. He had no land he owned, just a farm his parents paid money to grow crops upon. The orchard always felt like theirs..
But really...
He came into this world with nothing, and he began to realize in that moment, he'd leave this world with nothing. And the chilling remembrance of mortality made his eyes cast down towards the snow.

''Is there something wrong? You look a little pale. We can stop if you want or need it.'' Silmeria said. Of course her realisation of time was a lot different then that of humans. But spending many years of it alone was something that actually saddened her.  Hence her ongoing desire for compagnionship.

Killian gave a shiver.
"Perhaps we should, though should we make a small camp, or try to find a village nearby?"
The weather was at least nicer, but it was still winter, and still very cold.

''I recommend no village. The one we left is most likely the only one for days. The valley is not exactly packed with human life. Farms are most likely abandoned too due to this Winter and after our last farm I'd rather not walk into another. We will find a place to make camp but when we make camp we will not move until morning. I can keep all of us warm but I'd rather not travel by night if I'm not flying.''

It was not easy to find a suitable place to make camp. It was clear now but Winter winds could be sharp. She stopped by some bushes and trees. ''We can make camp here. I will provide the fire alright? Looking for wood in this snow is a horrible idea. If a mordecai happens to come across we can always lie and say you found a healer for the Arch Duke or something. And that I am not in chains because otherwise we'd freeze to death. Problem solved.''

Killian sighed.
"I'd be surprised if we ran into anyone, but with the way the war is going... Even the obvious isn't a sure thing." He studied her face before giving a small smile. "If they don't believe us, we could just fight our way out." it was an obvious jest as his eyes returned to his missing limb.
"I'm not sure the army would bother us too much. You're a women and I'm an injured soldier." neither of which could be useful in the war.

''So me being a woman makes me useless? I've been a general for a few hundred years.'' Silmeria laughed. Even so much her body shook. ''If it comes to combat I will make sure not to end their lives but rather have them walk back to the capital where they can personally say they lost a fight with a group against one. Now that is fun.''

She wiped the tears from her eyes and looked at Killian with a radiant smile. ''Seriously I do not know what you are doing with me but I feel less... sad. I can't believe hoe much influence Erian's betrayel still had over me after so many years. Thank you.''

Killian's gaze softened as he looked at her.
"You shouldn't be thanking me," he told her softly. "Did you already forget I owe you my life?"
And despite being nervous around her, he found himself bold enough to raise his hand to cup her cheek.

"But if it's worth anything, you make me less sad, too."

''I'm glad to hear that too.''

She tied the horses to a tree and formed a fire warm enough to provide plenty of warmth. With large canvas sheets she made it more like a shelter and the wind unless it would really storm, should not make their stay here to cold. The horses got more blankets as well and to prevent them from freezing up in the snow Silmeria vaporised the snow and ice to the level that the ground beneath was grass.

''I will need you to reveal what is left of your arm by the way. My tears may have healed your flesh and skin but it will still need after care. Especially with this cold. After that I could prepare us some soup from the supplies we have.''

He peered down at his missing limb.
"Is... There a chance it could get infected?"

''Nope. Not only do phoenix tears heal they basicly take care of everything. Poison, broken bones, rotten flesh, anything. However the new skin is soft and tender. That, is what needs care. Especially in this weather since if the skin gets to dry it will crack which is really unpleasant.''

From her bag she took a few small pots and flasks. ''Hmmm... jasmin scented oil or coconut fat. Which do you prefer.''

Killian blinked.
"Uh.. the fat one sounds kind of unpleasant, so I'd feel safer with the oil," he admitted, giving a sheepish smile.

''Oil it is then. Oil and fat are basicly the same though. The only difference with fat is that it is solid on temperatures oil is liquid. Now. Time for you to strip.'' Silmeria jestered.''Or at the least reveal your arm.''

Killian froze, blushing before sighing with relief.
"I don't think I ever had a woman to ask me to strip before." The blush remained, his smile, warm and soft as he slowly worked at removing his shirt. It was still awkward to do it with one hand, but he was patient, if anything, and once the buttons were taken care of, he shrugged off his shirt.

"I know it's not much to look at, but I'm just glad you don't shy away from it. I'm pretty sure most women would." His ears felt pink for suhc a statement, but he honestly wouldn't know. Before Silmeria had been Solita, and their love had been innocent- if not a distant memory by now.

''You sell yourself short.'' Silmeria replied bluntly and sat down opposite of him, close enough to reach what remained of the limb with ease.

After putting a bit of the oil on her hands she gently started to rub it on the sensitive skin. ''And also... I am sure many women initially would shy away as you show it but not most. And those who look away, tend to peek anyway. Those who say they do not are liars. As for me...''

She retreated her hand and applied a bit more oil, giving Killian a kind of teasing smile before she rubbed the other oil on. ''I, am actually rather picky.''

That made Killian blush. But at her latter words, his brows rose.
"Is that so?" He gave his remaining nub of a limb a subtle roll. "I guess being armless can be sexy to some." And he gave her a lopsided grin at his jest.

Silmeria chuckled.

''Truth be told I do not even see it is missing. You are fine the way you are. I find it pleasant to be with and around you. As if I almost can let my guard down. I just hope it will stay like that once you've seen me in the way I should be. That truth be told, is my main concern.'' she withdrew her hand and wiped it clean on a piece of cloth before closing the vial of oil.

''Done.'' she said silently. ''Your choice. Do you prefer porridge or stew for dinner.''

His thoughts lingered on what she said for a moment before he answered her.

"Do you have a preference?" he asked, adjusting a little to get comfortable. He stared down at once used to be his arm and grimaced. It wasn't a pretty sight, and the oils drew a lot of attention to the ugly coloration of the healing flesh.

''The color should get the same with the rest of your skin in no time you know. Things may be harder but it surely does not make you less of a person.'' She placed her hand on Killian's shoulder.

''I once almost lost my arm in my second cycle. For me though it is not just my arm. It is also my wing I could've lost. Somehow I always managed to prevent losing my limbs but I think that if I do, when I initiate a new cycle the limb will still be gone..'' she got on her feet.

''Sorry... I should maybe not have said that.. ehm.. for food I have no real preference. Porridge is easier though and makes a better breakfast then stew for tomorrow morning. But stew will help you recover better.'' she thought briefly. ''Hmm I will make some stew for tonight. In the meantime I will see if I can get some branches and twigs to make us more of a shelter. I do not like this weather.''

He smiled at that.
"You and me both. I could do without all this cold." He gestured with his shoulder and peered around, still thinking over all she's said.

"I couldn't imagine losing a limb, or wing, and being rebirthed and being stuck without it forever. Though I guess it's not that much different than my situation..." He sheepishly scratched the back of his neck. "I mean, it's not like I'll ever live, or relive, to see my arm return."

''Believe it or not there is actually magic that could let you grow one back. But the pain is excrusiating. There are other ways too. But it does not mean it is easy. Ingredients are required and spells. The risk is so high it is barely worth it. My contract magic could perhaps help you too. But the price for it is most likely high as well. After all. If we go that way it means you need to do something for me as well of equal value. No single magic is for free and contract magic is... not something to take lightly.''

She spoke quite casually about it as she grabbed ingredients and cut them swiftly with a hunting knife as she held it all in her hand, puting them in a pot.

He blinked, letting that all sink in.

"I could get it back?" He gave a curious tilt of his head. "But a sort of exchange... an exchange of what? It's not like I have anything to offer... I don't have magic, or money." That made him frown. He watched her work and moved closer.
"Can I help?" He still wasn't used to being waited on all the time- arm missing or not.

''The price is not money or magic Killian. It means you need to do something for me in return. But there is nothing I can ask. At least not now. Not to mention I need to get over Erian first. What he did left deeper wounds then I initially thought. And it is not until making that bloodbond, that I will know what the possible actions are regarding what you will need to do for me. Erian was almost dead. His payment was actually never done. Hence I left him behind dying. The same state he was in when the contract was formed. If you can not pay up, I need to take away the arm again. Hence, contract magic might not be the best way.''

It was not difficult to see she did not mind it easy saying all this. She was just about to add she did not need help but due to the trembling of her hands, the one holding the knife cut slightly further then intended and caused her to cut in her hand.

"Silmeria!" He reached for her hand. "Are you okay? God.. you're bleeding!"

''I'm fine..'' Silmeriareplied afterdropping the knife. The cut was mainly in the palm of her hand and nothing that would not heal but it stinged like a bitch.

''Well my first scar in this cycle.. could've been worse.'' she tried to jester but something told her it did not work that well this time. She wanted to suggest Killian to take bandages from her bag but recalled he had not been given permission yet.

She allowed a warm orange feather to grow on her arm and took it out with her good hand after dipping it into the palm of her hand with a short spell before offering it to Killian. ''Offer this into my bag. It will allow you to take things from it. I think bandaging this would be better then sealing it with hot metal.''

He looked at the feather, then back to her with a nod. He moved towards it, fumbling to open it before waiting a moment and wondering if it was as easy as him tossing the feather inside. So that's what he did, and then held his breath before slowly reaching forward, not sure how to look for what he wanted. The bag, as she explained before, was not just a bag- but something more. And though his hands slipped over a few strange feeling things, he did flinch when he grabbed onto what he needed.

"I got it! I got some bandaging!" he exclaimed, pulling the clothe out with sheer surprise.

''Usually the bag gives you what you needs. IF you have permission from me to use it.'' She now regretted a little to have molten all of the snow but she took her waterskin instead and washed the blood off. ''Do you know how to bandage something like this?'' She kind of hoped he did since doing it with one hand would end up in one clumbsy mess.

He nodded.
"Y-yeah. Well, I can do my best," and he moved closer to her, opening the bandages and waiting for her to offer her hand.

After rinsing it Silmeria offered her hand again but with the wound down so blood would not form a puddle in hand. ''Maybe I should just make a trip to the spirit realm and burn Erian's spirit a couple of hundred times...'' she said quietly.

He started to wrap her palm, being gentle about it when he froze at her words.
"Sil?" he could see the hurt on her expression, and frowned, pausing a moment to awkwardly finish wrapping her wound with his one hand before giving it to her to help him tie it off.

"It still hurts.... doesn't it? His memory... how long ago was it?" he asked her softly, gently.

''417 years.'' Silmeria replied quietly as she helping finishing bandaging her hand. ''And yes it still hurts. I had fooled myself into thinking I got over it but... Erian was the first man I ever loved. Which is why it hurts so much. I trusted him with everything. My secrets, dreams, my magic. Even weaknesses. I wanted to be with him till the end of my days. It is possible to do that even with mortals for as long as the bloodbond lasts. But instead he was just about to sell me or tame me. In the end I was nothing but an object for him. And that hurts. Because I hoped he was different then so many of my other contractors.'' despite the topic she smiled and thanked him for the bandage.

''If he would stand in front of me today I do not even know what I will do. Ask his intentions, leave without saying anything, or surrender myself to the pain and rage. Or none of those at all.''

Killian stared down at her bandaged hand. 417 years? He couldn't even fathom living that long, let along feeling scorned for that long. ALl he could think to do was comfort her int he only way he knew how, and he wrapped his arm around her and just held her.

"No one deserves that kind of torture, Silmeria. No one. I'm just sorry I can't help you with that pain. But I am thankful you're willing to talk to me about it. Talking, they say, is one method of healing."

''Thank you, Killian. I hope you are right. Truth be told I never wanted more then to just settle down somewhere and start a family. I just somehow always end up fighting battles that are not mine. But that is my nature.'' she smiled at him before closing her eyes briefly.

''Erian is not worth a single second of my thoughts or affection. I'm sure I will get over him. I had not thought that his memory could still hurt me so.'' she paused briefly before she chuckled.

''here I am, a 1400 year old phoenix who still needs to learn most of life's lessons. I'm lucky to have met you.''

Killian smiled.
"I'd beg to differ, but I think we're both lucky on all accounts. I'm just glad I'm not being a hindrance completely," he went on, turning sheepish as his cheeks flushed.

''You are no hindrance to me Killian. I mean that. Sure I sometimes can come across cold, but that is not intentional.

Her gaze then went to the food. ''I should resume making dinner. We need it.''
She grabbed the root vegetable she was working on before the knife had cut her. She did clean the knife before resuming and with the bandage it went a bit clumsily.

''We will need to sleep close to the horses tonight. That way I can keep all of us warm. We are only shielded from one side regarding the wind now but I will finish the shelter before we are going to rest.''

"I can help with the shelter. I don't feel like I'm helping as much as I should. I could at least do that while you work on this."

''Alright. Sounds like a plan.'' Silmeria replied.

''There are blankets and furs in my bag. It is easy to retrieve them. A fur can be placed about a metre away from the horses on the ground. That is where we will sleep on. I will help once I have the stew on the fire though since it needs to be heated for a bit.''

He moved towards her bag, and though he had been given permission, and had done so not too long before, he still felt strange rummaging through it. But it seemed the bag knew what he wanted, or he was just lucky, because finding the items he needed was no challenge.

He took the furs and spread them across the defrosted ground, thinking how nice it must be to have such power, an idea of which brought him back to his initial view on magic and mages- one he felt had been greatly (and perhaps too much so) influenced by his own country, it's laws. He peered over at Silmeria as she worked, and how without her help, no matter if she were human or not, she was no different than he or any other person he'd met. In fact, all he saw was a woman he cared about. Not just lusted for, for that was much was obvious, but one he felt a connection to.

He had blamed the weather at first for it, this unyileding battlefield of snow, but he found himself only to be grateful for this encounter. His mother had always told him that we're all meant to walk our own path- and though his was becoming tremendously hard the further he went, he was happy to have someone like Silmeria at his side during such a time.

ALthough, he still felt the guilt towards Solita. Even though she was his first love- and for all he knew, a love he still kept now, he had such strong feelings for Silmeria they were undeniable. But he still felt the need to help Solita... If somehow they made it as lovers, or if not, she did not deserve her prison in the palace of the Grand Duke-
Or a fate that could be much worse. For all he knew, she was dead. But there were things far worse than death.

Whilest she worked, Silmeria did not know that Killian had been looking at her and put the cooking pot above the fire with the lid on it. She then cleaned the knives she used, puting them back in her boots before she joined Killian with the furs. The fire itself was not that far from the one that they would be sleeping on when the night would fall.

Due to the lack of trees though she pulled some spears out of her bag too. Puting them firmly in the ground which did reveal her strength. No way a normal human could get them in the ground so deep.

A frosty wind however picked up with powder snow in it's gusts and after effort even from her side the large makeshift tent was put up. The pelts and canvases keeping out the cold. Only at the top there was an opening for the smoke to escape through.

''The snow will act as another protective layer for us on the pelts. We should be good.'' She said although could not hold back coughing. Her breathing seemed to make an additional noise too.

On the bright side it had taken both of them rather long to put it all up and the stew was done. Silmeria took the pot from the fire with her bare hands and set it on a few stones. ''I hope you are hungry. It will warm us up well.''

"You know.." He went on, moving up beside her. "Watching you work makes me actually jealous I'm not a mage, or Phoenix.. or any sort of creature that's not as weak seeming as a human."

''Once again you sell yourself short.'' Silmeria said and poured some stew in each bowl after her coughing stopped. ''Humans are a rather young race but have accomplished a lot. Being a phoenix is not as much fun as it seems. I can not bathe for as long as I'd want to. Being exposed to water to long can kill me. Breathing in powder snow like what I had done several minutes ago can make me ill. Humans are strong because of their lack of magic.''

She drank the liquid from the stew and her breathing seemed to sound normal again. ''All magic comes at a price. Even being ageless is not for free. I had a friend whom had lived a lot longer then I had. Everyone around him eventually died of old age. Words could not describe how happy he was when he realised old age did not nessesarily count for me. And I was happy to meet him for that very same reason. It is not painful for me to be around mortals but eventually, I will see you age. And your children. And then theirs.''

Seeing his children age was a sobering thought, considering he had none at all and still, up to about  a few years ago, still felt very much like a boy himself. Though obviously a man now, this idea really reminded him of his mortality.

"Well.." he went on with a soft laugh. "Presuming I ever have kids, you might not have to worry about that."

But then he blushed and turned to her, realizing...
"Wait.. can Phoenix's have... well, kids?"
And more importantly.. could they sire children of men? She had been the first and only woman he took to a bed and well...
He knew well enough that their actions could result in... well.... offspring.

''I can get pregnant if that is what you mean. But it will require me to remain in this form a few weeks in a row with little to no original form appearance. In my bird form I will lay eggs instead or if I morph on time be pregnant as a humanoid. Morphing during pregnancy or when the eggs are forming however is really exhausting and dangerous though. Not only for the child or children but also the mother. I can already assure you I have not been in this form long enough to risk being pregnant from last night.''

Speaking about last night though did automaticly make her blush. Outside their makeshift tent the winds were howling but no wind or snow got in. The horses seemed to be at ease too.

His flush grew warmer.
"I.... That wasn't my intention," he mumbled. "I'm sorry."

''There is no need for you to say sorry you know. Seriously.'' The bowls were not large and got herself a new serving.''would you like some more?'' She asked.

He was quiet a moment before lifting his bowl.
"Yes, please."

Silmeria put another good scoop full into Killian's bowl.

''Make sure you eat well ok?'' she said calmly. ''Try not to think to much. It may help as well. Keeping your head in the now rather then the present. I'd be insane if I would not do that most of the time.''

After refilling Killian's bowl she ate the contends of her own. After dinner she got on her feet and put out her boots. ''If the weather is like this tomorrow we will remain camping here by the way. If we fall to far behind I could always sit behind you and let you sleep while we travel further. Powdersnow in the condition outside will kill me.''

She took off her boots and set then aside before taking off the upperlayers of her warm travelersdress.

"Kill you?" Killian asked, mouth agape. "Shouldn't we try to find better cover then?"

''This shelter is fine. I survived thanks to this kind of shelters more often. It is only lethal to my if I breathe in to much powdersnow. So no need to worry about me. Promise?'' She asked as she discarded the top layer of her clothing, placing it down neatly next to her boots.

''Me being a creature of fire just comes with these risks.''

"Yeah but... How would you know if it's been too long?"

''First signals are caughing, like I did earlier. Stage after that... is that I will cough blood and be less stable on my feet. I collapse after that and it will appear like my body is in shock. Then, I will lose consciousness. Depending on how long the loss of consciousness is I will die. I suppose the loss of consciousness limit is no longer then five minutes. But already if I am in the second stage I will become very, very ill. Only a fire can basicly help me cure faster. No fluids. Just... a lot of heat. Body heat, heat of fire... even sex helps. Anything to at the least keep my temperature up. But trust me when I say this.'' she had walked towards the horses and gently patted their noses before she looked at Killian.

''I will be in such severe pain I even ask for death just to relief myself from it. Being exposed to water to long will result into the same. I can handle a bath, a short one. But to long and the water will sting like needles on every inch of my body.''

"Even sex?" he asked, voice choking. He shook his head of it, but still blushed.
He cast his eyes away, sheepish. Had he a dirty tongue, he might jest he should always bed her then... But even he was still awkward around this woman, and he wondered how long it would take him to get used to this attraction.

"I'm sorry... Er, what I meant to say is.." he began, clumsily approaching her. "I would never let that happen." he placed a gentle hand on her arm.

''Never say never Killian.'' Silmeria replied calmly. ''And yes... even sex. It heats the body up after all and fire around me responds to my mood. But truth be told, being bedded like that is not exactly pleasant. Not at first anyway. I had to endure it four times, something like that.''

She gave him a kind smile. ''Not to worry though... I will do my outmost best not having to put you in that situation. Or me... I do not exactly desire to feel that kind of pain again.''

His expression dropped.
"I... I'm sorry."

''Again with the sorry.'' she lifted his chin. ''If you keep saying it I will need to punish you.'' she teased and leaned forward pressing a soft kiss on his forhead.

''Relax already... I am not going to die on you. Ever. I promise.''

He sighed and moved his warm hand to rest on her cheek.
"I wish I could promise the same to you." And leaned forward to kiss her lips softly, and as he did so, felt the familiar tingle of emotions bubble within his belly and heart.

It was true. At some point Killian would indeed die but for as long as they could stay together she would enjoy it. The kiss though was something that caught her off guard. But she did answer it. And again found herself almost unable to pull back from it. His sweet scent, soft lips, his presence even. Her physacal senses slowly sharpening when lust slowly blossemef again.

It did not last long until Solita's name snuck in her head though and she slowly broke it.''I told myself I would never love again... wether I break that promise with myself Ior not I do not know. But you do love someone. If we keep doing these things I do need to know you are fully behind it including the possible consequences. No matter what you chose I will not leave unless you really command me to.''

Solita....
His heart dropped and he gave her a sad smile.

"I'm sorry... I know it must be frustrating..." He cast his eyes downwards. "I'm ashamed to admit I had forgotten her in the moment.... But now that you remind me of her..." He raised his blue eyes to meet her's again. "I Know I owe her at least an explanation.... or a means to escape her hold in the capital." He sighed and looked into her eyes.

''It is not nessesarily frustrating for me. But intimacy... if you feel guilty we should not do it. You need to enjoy it. The road towards it, and when it is over look back to it fondly. For me... intimacy is kind of a primal dance. A show of appreciation and affection or nothing more but lust. And it will remain that way for me. Unless or until I decide to have a mate. Momentarily haven forgotten about Solita is nothing to be ashamed of. Truth be told, you make me forget about Erian too. I do not mind intimacy with you. But you need to be a hundred percent behind it. That is a choice you need to make on your own.'' she spoke calmly and soft with nothing but understanding.

''Whatever happens I will still help you to get her out of there. Maybe even cause a ruckus and get other prisoners out.'' the last scentence despite spoken as a kind of jester, she did mean it.

Killian smiled at her.
"Then let's go as soon as we are able to. I want to make peace.. to figure this all out, and make right what I've wronged in this world- both in the war...and with my heart."

Silmeria nodded. ''We will resume riding when the storm lays down alright? I am not a fan of traveling by night but we can if we must. I can light the way in the meantime.'' she assured. Things would've been so much easier if they could fly.

''But as long as the storm rages, we can not travel safely. It will kill the both of us and the horses.'' she laid down on the large soft fur after discarding as much clothing as she could without becoming to indecent and took another fur that served as a blanket. The horses already seemed to be sleeping too.

Killian sat there for a time before moving to settle in for a night's rest. But his mind was plagued with many thoughts, and despite the warmth of their little oasis of heat, he could still see the snows falling endlessly around them.

What if the snows never yielded? He closed his eyes and tried to forget about it, but just as sleep was about to claim him- so were the nightmare's of the war.

The screams of men, the cold scent mindled with blood on the northern winds, the thick smoke from black powder....
And his own fight for survival.

He woke up with a start, body covered in sweat just as the memories came where he had to cut off his own arm. And he trembled, shivered as he tried to calm himself, but the warm comfort of Sil's powers were too much, and he found himself scrambling outside of the warmth and into the striking cold of the winter winds.

He dropped to his knees, panting heavily as he let the cold sting him and let him remember-
He was a man. A human. A mortal....
And this world was dictated by some sort of cruel twist of fate.

While she slept, Silmeria's breathing had actually gotten worse again and her body trembled slightly which possibly could explain it was warmer then she intended. She did soon enough noticed Killian was not laying beside her.

''Killian?...'' she whispered. Her voice a little hoarse. Outside she could hear the winds and a bit of the cold entered their makeshift tent from the opening that had formed when Killian exited it.

She got up, comforted the horses and went to the opening where snow and icy cold winds. With her hand she covered her nose and mouth. ''Killian?!'' the storm was so severe she could barely see in front of her.

He barely heard her words over the turmoil of his own mind and the weather. But once he realized it was not a figment of his imagination, he turned around and barely saw Silmeria's form through the snow. Panic struck him as he scrambled off his knees and rushed at her, scooping her out from the snow and stumbling with her in his arm back into her magic field.

He was panting, his heart beating rapidly as he paused to look down at her before takin a step back to give her space.

"Silmeria.... Are you okay?" His eyes searched hers. "What were you doing out in this weather?"

''I can ask you the same thing. Do you want to get sick?'' she asked after removing her hand from her mouth. ''If it was to warm for you in here you would've woken me up and ask to cool down you know...'' she could not finished her scentence though as she coughed again.

Reducing the amount of heat the fire released was exactly what she did though while she closed the gap between the furs.''It is just as dangerous out there for you as it is for me... if anything is on your mind just... tell me. Please?''

Sighing, Killian moved with her to sit upon the furs. He was quiet for a moment, just observing her before speaking.
"I had a bad dream. When I awoke, I felt stifled and sweaty. I'm not sure it's because it was over how warm it was in here, for I am grateful for the heat. But my mind... I panicked, and felt the need to just... just be outside." He sighed and shook his head. "I know it sounds crazy..." he dropped his gaze. "The war ... it seems it's already haunting me."

''I know what you mean.'' Silmeria replied after a few more coughs and sealed the furstight so no snow and cold wind could get through.

''I'm not exactly fond of killing people. I do have a kind of survival switch but... I remember the faces of every life I have ever taken. I make it my job to remember. When I realised in my second cycle I was serving a tyran instead of a proper ruler... I panicked and got overflown with guilt. Realising all the bad things I had done. The lives I took, the lives of those I ruined. It is exactly why I hate war. Being in the midst of it eventually makes you dull. But when taking a step back it can overwhelm you. Like your dreams. It is important to speak about how you feel especially guilt. If you do not, it can eat you up from the inside. I never asked forgiveness for what I had done but I did redeem myself. It did not remove everything of course but lightened some weight off me.''

Killian nodded.
"I know what you mean." He gave her a small smile. "It doesn't mean it'll be easy."

''Is it ever?'' Silmeria asked before she coughed again. She actually felt slightly dizzy but knew it was nothing to worry about. She just needed a littlebit of sleep and after getting some charcoal from her bag which she burned intill doing nothing more then glowing in the firepit she returned to the fur.

''I will not influence the fire anymore ok? It will still be warm enough but I am kind of... worn out.'' she admitted.

''If you have a bad dream, promise you will wake me up ok? That is what friends are for.''

Killian gave her a lopsided smile.
"Please, do rest. And if you need to, you can always lay near me to keep warm," he offered, a playfulness in his tone.

''You keeping me warm. Truth be told I do wonder how that would be like.'' Silmeria replied

She relaxed a bit more and made herself comfortable on the fur makeshift bed.''Do not go outside in this weather though alright? I would not like to be the one telling your friends and family that you turned into an icicle.'' Her gaze then went to the horses. One seemed to be allert and soon realised why. There was a howl of a wolf or type of hound in the very far distance causing Silmeria to reduce the fire to nothing more but weakly glowing coals.''Come. We should rest. No need to worry about those wolves. These horses know I mean them no harm but when wolves with bad intentions smell me they will leave us alone.'' Not to mention they were concealed by snowcovered furs and the makesfmhift tent would not be easy for them to quickly enter.

"Wolves?" Killian shivered, then scooted to move closer to Silmeria. "So you can take care of wolves, too?" He sighed through a smile and studied her face. "Is there anything you can't do?" His smile grew crooked. "You know, ever since I met you... life has felt like a dream."

''Then I hope it is a good dream. But do know that there are plenty of things I can not do. The wolves are mainly, because they can smell what I am. Animals smell danger and fear.''

She took the cover fur and pulled it over them till their chests.''Sleep. If anything gets to close the horses will warn us.'' She gave Killian a kiss on his cheek before she closed her eyes to get some rest

Closing his eyes, he obeyed, and through a sigh he whispered, "Sleep well, Silmeria,"

Only the Gods knew what the next day might bring, if there was a next day or not. All he could do was thank whatever God was responsible for pulling him out of the war. He was no soldier, not really- and killing men....

It was a nightmare best left forgotten..
and for men who could stomach it.

His dreams, at least, were of no significance, and if they had been he couldn't remember. Even still, he slept and slept well. Perhaps it was due to the warmth share, and perhaps the comfort given.

Perhaps it was both.

With the fire out it was dark in the tent and significantly cooler. But not to cold either. Silmeria despite resting did not sleep. The sound the wolves had made sounded off. It could have been or caused by the raging snowstorm. The horses were a bit agitated too. But then again who would travel in weather like this?

The storm had laid down before morning came much to Silmeria's relief and with wood she remade the fire to heat up the stew.

Come the morning, it would shed some light on just what was making the horse's uneasy, for just on the horizon was a group of men- some semblance of an army, and they carried the Grand Duke's flag. Killian, for the moment, remained in ignorance as he continued to sleep.

Silmeria was unaware of their presence and the legion of fighters of them. The snow from the storm had covered the furs causing them to blend in in the enviroment.  It were the hounds Silmeria had noticed first though. Hearing them bark and one of them digging at the base of their makeshift tent.

It was a few seconds then that the hounds barked differently; fear. And they quickly ran back. To their masters with the tail between their legs. Silmeria swore beneath her breath and took Killians armor from her bag, and put her posessions in it she did not immediatly need, muttering a spell afterwards on the bag.

She then knelt down beside Killian.''Killian wake up. Trouble.'' She whispered.''remember what I said. I am if they ask a captive mage whom you are bringing to the grand duke...'' it would not take long long for a scout or small group to approach them

Killian groggily opened an eye.
"Trouble.. what?" he scrambled suddenly out of bed. "What do you mean? What has happened?"

''I will not know until we go outside but they have dogs. In the worst case, raiders, mordecai or the Grand Duke's army.'' she whispered.

''If those hounds smell magic, remember. I use magic continuesly to just stay in this form. So if they are hunting for mages... I am your captive. Do I make myself clear?'' she got on her feet.

"Wait.. captive.. how... why!?" he asked, fumbling to stand. He could hear the hounds...
Connlaothian trackers. There was no doubt who they were- an army....
His army. The one that claimed a flag supporting the Grand Duke.

''A captive who is taking you to the capital to report the loss of the fort you were at, having used magic to keep you alive and safe in the cold. Killian if I am a free mage, they will take me captive. Not that I will allow myself to be taken captive but they will try. And then by the time we are gone the snow is red. Trust me. You do not want to see me do that.''

Killian just stared at her, before numbly shaking his head.
"But if you are my captive, it gives the army full rights to remove you from my custody and into theirs!" He raked a hand through his hair, eyes moving, mind racing.

''Even if that means my presence keeps you alive? You are the only one who knows what happened at the fort. What would the other option be. Mage camp? Or is there another way that will not make them forcefully remove me from you.''

Silmeria could hear the footsteps of the scout group. There was not much time left.

''Anyone in there? Exit the tent unarmed. Any sign of hostility and we will use force. Any mage in there, you are surrounded by Mordecai. Do not even consider using magic.'' a man outside the tent spoke

Killian shook his head. He had no idea. What could he do? What could they do?
And then...
The men were upon them. Killian swallowed, a knot forming sharp in his throat. He gave her one look before he opened the tent flap and stepped outside.

He hadn't the chance to put on any of his armor, and to see the armed men so near had him raising his one hand.

"State your name and reason for being here," came their leader's demands, the horse beneath him moving impatiently.

Killian stared at the man before revealing, "I"m Killian Gryst. And I am a soldier of the Grand Duke's army, one of the survivor's from Fort Dhagh."

"Fort Dhagh?" The man on horse back looked at him skeptically. "And why did you not remain there to defend it from the opposing army?"

"I did sir. But I was run off, injured...." Killian stuttered, uncertain what they were expecting of him, for their voices were sharp and accusing.

Silmeria bit her lip. As much as she disliked this situation though there was plenty she could do but shouldn't do.

''Injured you say. In what way soldier. Also. Our hounds behaviour indicates you travel with a mage. Care to explain that?'' one of them asked.

Barefooted she exited the tent, barefooted wearing nothing but her underdress, and kneeled. ''It is true Sir. I found him at death's door and saved his life. He was unconscious for a long time and was not sure he would survive but I treated him. I am ashamed to say that I had to break the law  regarding usage of magic but I could not leave him behind like that. When he came to and was capable of traveling again he made sure I could not run off and ordered me to take him to the Grand Duke so he could report the events of what had occured and give me to him personally.''

The way she spoke and even her posture was different. Obedient even. And Silmeria hoped that Killian would play along.

The men, well armed and wary, turned to the woman while the hounds whimpered and whined against their chains. And though Killian himself was as taken back by Silmeria's sudden presence, he took a step forward, and kept his head high as he nodded.

"She speaks the truth. We were hoping to travel south."

The men exchanged glances before looking over at Killian.

"Then you should travel with us. We were hoping to accomplish the same." they looked Killian over. "Do you still have your armor.. weapons, and shield?"

Killian was numb for a moment before replying, "Yes."
And he had to wonder why they cared.. was it for proof? Or did they expect him, in his one armed state, to fight?

So far so good. But maybe it went even to good.

''Judging by the hounds I assume it is safe to say you are a mage. Why is she not in chains?''

''Chains are not needed sir. Master Gryst offered me two choices. Excecution for performing magic or live and being brought to the Grand Duke where he would present me as a gift. Believing my skills to be useful to him. Not wanting to die, I choose the latter. But when we rest he takes my clithes and schoes to make sure I can not escape would I take my chances. And this weather, almost nobody can survive alone.''

The whole time she kept herself small and subjective. But she did notice one thing. She could not feel her magic being surpressed by the present mordecai. Meaning she had acces to it.

They listened to the mage's words before commanding Killian to bring his soldier's attire to them. He obeyed, knowing that as each second passed, Silmeria would be closer to being in chains. He just hoped as long as they complied... they would leave the pair of them alone.

The leader was satisfied with the show of armor and seemed to believe his story checked out. However, as he turned to Silmeria he informed them, "You shall both travel with us, but the girl must be in chains. As a prisoner, she will be thoroughly watched and have limited freedom."

"Chains?" Killian paled, and felt his gut tighten into a knot. "Is that really necessary? She.. she had helped me..."

"Even still, we are at war, soldier. You know this. We do it to ensure our own safety, even her's."

''Can I request for rope at the least? I do not respond good to iron. Also with Master Gryst having lost his arm I would like to break down the camp. Not to mention without proper clothes and shoes I will freeze to death.''

Truth be told wether it was metal or rope it mattered not. It either would burn or melt if the situation would require it. ''Master Gryst I recommend for you to dress warm too.'' Silmeria got on her feet. Things could have been worse. She went inside so she could get dressed.

A stern command by the men had Killian following after, another soldier at the tent's flap, keeping watch, and Killian giving Silmeria an apologetic look.

"You don't have to take down the tent by yourself. Just get dressed... I'll help you pack."

''It will be alright.'' Silmeria assured and got herself dressed before putting the furs and supplies in the magic bag. After that it was taking down the furs when the snow was removed.''It in theory is actually safer with them, believe it or not.'' Despite she had no provisions for them at the least if it would come to a battle it would not involve them. Killian with am arm less was not considdered to be a proper soldier.

Killian went quiet, helping her pack up their camp before whispering to her, "I'm still afraid for you."

''I have been alive for 1400 yeats and I have a promise with you. Right now if we play along it is alright. It is also not the first time I will be restrained and not the last. I will be alright I promise.''

She gave Killian a kiss on his cheek and put all furs, pelts and canvasses in the bag. Something that surprised the man.

''You. What is that bag. Magic is not possible to be cast or used in this direct enviroment.'' The man who Silmeria assumed to be the general replied.

''The bag is made from the hide of a type of fairy hound who has a bridge between dimensions Sir. The magic continues after the death of the creature.'' Silmeria replied as she slung the bag over her schoulder.''It unfortunatly is not possible for everyone to use this bag.''

"Then give it to me," the man demanded. "We shall burn it. No magic is allowed in these lands."

''With that I need to correct you General. Magic which is not useful to the archduke is forbidden. How will he respond if he knows that you burned a bag as priceless as this and destroyed everything in it? Wars are expensive are they not?'' She stuck her hand in the bag and after taking it out she had taken out a vase of selenite with beautiful carvings, gemstones and beautifully detailed sngelic and fairy forms.

''It would be a waste don't you think?'' The vase was shown and put back. Not to mention armor. Still unhatched dragoneggs, weapons made by famous alchemists... but if you are willing to take that responsibility then fine. Maybe we can still catch the snowfalcon I sent out with the mrssage I would be arriving soon with that bag.'' The last dventence was a lie but she kept talking in the same tone. Making it more believable.  Now it was hoping they bought it.''Also it is way to much to divide over the army and I am the only one who can carry it and open it. Go ahead. Try.'' The bag would be immensely heavy and if one would try to open it the bugs that would escape would be hilarious.

The general was skeptical at best before he turned from the damned mage and slugged a fist across Killian's face. Not expecting it, Killian let out a cry and dropped to the snow.

"Who gave you permission to contact the Grand Duke with some present from a mage?" the man asked angrily, and before Killian could respond, the man kicked Killian in his side. "How dare you presume something so dangerous as magic would be of used to him! And you call yourself a soldier!"

He turned to his men.
"Put them both in chains and make them walk behind the horses."

''Killian!'' Silmeria slapped the mans face before pushing him away with a lot of force. Something did seem to stay behind on the mans face, looking an awfull lot like blood, which it was. The force was enough to make the man stumble backwards and she hurried herself beside Killian. ''We have been nothing more then cooperational. I had sent that fucking message before I met him. Sir Gryst did not know. If you need to take it out on someone take it out on me. The encounter between Killian and me were completely coincidental. My magic and knowledge is not meant to use on the grand duke, it is meant for him to use on mages. So, Sir Magnus, grand son of a Fey, future father of a male flower mage. Not to mention that you hide your sister who is a mage. Come to think of ot. You have magic too dont you. Act like your rank.  Before I am going to spill more secrets.''

It was not often she used magic Kayden tought her to use to the fullest but it certainly was usefull. Being a bloodphoenix seemed to be very useful now or not. If things would escalate more she would no longer do it the friendly way.

Whether or not he heard truths in her words, his blood was on fire, and all he wanted to see was red. He drew out his sword and bellowed, "Seize them! Seize them both! And if they resist, I want their heads on a pike!"

And before Killian knew what was going on, two soldier's apprehended him, another snatching for the magical bag, and two other men were latching onto Sil.

''Killian, I recommend closing your eyes.'' Silmeria replied. Her eyes glew red as she spoke and everything from her calm demeanor vanished. The men who had their hands on Killian were first. Killian would not feel the heat other then it being a rush of warm air as the men froze in their position. Skin turning red and black like burning coals before they turned into dust. Not even having time to feel it. Their armors falling on the ground.

The men who got the bag could not even lift it from the ground so that thing was the least of her concern.

''Not that I told whole the truth but you made me remember why I do not interact with people. You even attack your own soldiers. At the least you will be demoted when you get out of here.'' Her gaze went to the man she slapped. For years mages have been getting this treatment right? All of you deny your own heritage. My guesses are that it started with those that had no magic. Feeling supressed by those who had. Magic is something that belongs in this world. And for years you all have been damaging that very balance. Neither me and Killian have been a threat to you. And I will give this warning once. If you deep in your heart are against this war. Draw your weapon and throw it away. I will spare those who do. You want to attack? I will give you a reason to do that. For this is what happens when balance is disrupted long enough. Things retaliate.''

The hounds stopped barking and instead made a squeeking voice before they dashed off. Horses started to prance and many succeeded in throwing off their riders as they ran off. Some riders being thrown off as they did so. They were frightened and had every reason to be. Remarkably the two horses Silmeria and Killian had with them were a lot calmer and with a flame the ropes were burned with which they were tied to a tree. The two animals joined Killian's side but did seem eager to go.

''Killian, take the bag, get on the horse and go. I will be right behind you. That, is an order.'' she said to him.

Fire then soon engulfed Silmeria. First just covering her frame, concealing it. No. She turned into fire itself. That was how it looked like anyway and then it grew to the size of a young dragon. Her razorsharp black talons showed first, then the rest of her body. Fiery colored feathers, widely spreaded wings and a loud eagle cry. A few beats of her wings followed. Strong enough to knock those in a twenty metre radius off their feet.

Part of him wished he obeyed. Closing his eyes would have made digesting what he witnessed all the more bearable. Men on fire. Men to ash. And a woman consumed in flames.

What was he seeing? What was happening to all them? He'd be lying if he said fear did not grip him and freeze him into place, and when he was finally addressed and commanded to leave, he could not lie that it was fear that provoked that very response.

He wasn't sure what to expect, or even how to react. He was numb to it all, to this reality, to his heat and stumbled as he grabbed the horses reins and clumsily mounted the one. Then with both in tow, he gave a sharp kick to their sides and rode off...
urging the beasts to run faster and faster still... All the while Killian's mind was in a whirl of emotion and panic.

He wanted to stay. He wanted to help her. He wanted to make things right. But even his deep rooted prejudice coupled with this unknown ability fueled his racing heart, and drummed the only action he could manage in the moment-


To run. To run far away, And not to look back.

It would be like closing his eyes. Keep his back to the screaming. Keep his back to the flames.
And let it all fall into the dust.

''Do not let him get away'' the general spoke and after a moment a few attempted to follow the order. Only for their road to be blocked by a wall of fire and a loud cry. Whatever was going on Silmeria was angry to say the least. Those with metal weapons close enough to her soon found the metal to hot to hold and the ones wearing armor screamed in pain as the heat made it unbearable.

The first arrows had made their way to Silmeria penetrating her body at several places but other then angering her more it seemed to not have a lot of effect. It was then the first wave of heat started to kill soldiers in a faster rate but selective. It had not been many who had been spared but those who had thrown their weapons away or were unarmed were still standing.

More waves of fire started to kill men part by part and many perished as they attempted to take Silmeria down. Even in the air spears and any other weapon they could use were used while the horses left with Killian further and further away from the searing heat until hours later where they stopped from exhaustion.

((No idea regarding the enviroment but can be anything you'd like. It would be something concealed though like for example a forest or a palce of yours choice.''

He didn't know which way to go. He didn't know how much time had passed, but when the strange lights flaring from Silmeria's fiery fanfare had long stopped, so did he with the horses. They had reached a river bank, and both he and the two horses were exhausted. It had began to rain, a freezing rain that belted and began to coat the three of them in ice.

He lead the horses beneath a canopy of trees, shivering as he stood between the pair of them and tied them loosely to the trunk of a tree. As he was doing so, however, he noticed something off int he distance. The plumes of smoke.

He blinked, leaning forward and trying to get his eyes to register what he was seeing. Then it became clear. He had run to a nearby village. He wasn't sure what village or where, but it seemed this one was at least safe and housed people, because the smoke was puffing up from chimneys.

Gritting his teeth, he made the choice to enter the town. If he had to, he could sell one of the horses for lodging and food. After all he had been through, it would be worth it. He wanted to lay down in a bed, close his eyes and forget this winter. Forget this war. Forget the ashes left in the snow.

But as he approached the small town, he paused as he was leading the horses over a small bridge to pass the creek and shielded his eyes from the ice that continued to rain down upon him. Silmeria was no where in sight. He felt guilt grip at his heart as he panted out white puffs of breath.

She'd find him right? She had magic. She'd be okay.

His heart was drumming and he felt dizzy. Each step was clumsy and when he made it into town, he was shaking something fierce. He couldn't even get out all he wanted to say when a young woman hushed him and hurriedly guided the young man inside.

Her cottage home sat squat near the town's church, both of which had a nice sheet of ice at their door atop of a foot of snow. The woman cursed some as she moved to shovel away just enough so she could open her door. She held it open and gestured for Killian to go ahead inside. But he paused, teeth chattering and asked,
"What of the horses?"

Her blue eyes looked from him, then to the horses before she grabbed the reigns and gave a pull. Bring them inside too. They'll freeze outside like the other animals had.

He was about to protest if they could fit inside, and it seemed the horses were uncertain too, but after some coaxing, the woman got the pair of horses inside and settled them up near the hearth where the fire was crackling warmly. Her hood had come down, skewing her face and hair-
and Killian found himself staring at her for much longer than he ought to have.

She was beautiful, a red haired, blue eyed beauty of the North. But it was her gesture towards the fire that brought him back to reality.
"Please come in and sit. I can help you take off them clothes. You'll lose limbs if you keep 'em on."

Although he protested, the woman assured him she had three older brothers and there was nothing to be ashamed of. But as she moved to help him, it was only then she realized...

"Ansgar's beard..." Her eyes flashed to him. "You've done lost your arm."

Killian flinched and pulled away.

"I can manage on my own." He had his back to her as he went about, shuffling awkwardly to slip off his coat. The woman sighed and moved to his side again, and helped him.

"It's been a long winter, a long war," she told him, placing a hand on his shoulder to get him to look at her. "Just take this bit o' help, stranger. You deserve. NO matter what side yer on."


Eventually his clothin was removed, and he was layered up in three blankets wrapped tightly around his form. He was shivering, but less so,a nd by now the icicles in his white blonde hair were melting and the ones' on his hung clothing, too. He was lost in thought as he gazed into the fire, but when the red haired woman came into view and offered him a steaming cup, he looked at her then eagerly took it.

"It's tea of the forest. It'll sooth you and help you sleep, if you can."

"Thank you," he told her, sipping at it and beginning to cough.

"Hey there, no dying by choking on my tea now. It would make me a lousy hostess now wouldn't it?"

Killian smiled at her joke, and she smiled in return.

"There's a handsome smile if I ever saw one. Can't say I blame you for looking so grim when you came in here. The world out there... its' unforgiving. Ansgar's way to make his own mark on this war, I suppose."

Killian looked her over, and shivered again. It was tehn the woman moved forward and touched a hand to his forehead. She gasped and stepped back.

"By the storms, your with fever. Come.. let me fetch you another blanket and some cool clothes. Can't 'ave that killin' ya either. I don't intend to be hosting no ghost."

One hour passed followed by a second and a third and there still had been no sign of Silmeria. The cold rain had turned into hail and soon there was a blizzard almost as fierce as the one the night before had offered. Weather which for Silmeria was lethal and without her supplies she had no way of finding cover or making a shelter.

Those who had survived her flames and talons would have a hard time surviving too. Frostbite was a nasty thing and the cold went through the bone.

It had been a total of eight hours before the storm lay down and became a pleasant kind snowfall and still nothing. No knocking on the door, or sightings of fire. Not even an army with wounded claiming medicine,supplies and shelter.

Killian refused her bed when she offered, but took up space on her couch where it was. It was decidedly better to be near the fire anyway, but the woman remained close as she tended to him. He was in a bit of a daze from the gloom of his travels, and from the blaring heat of his fever and chill from the storm.

"You got a name, soldier?"

Killian looked up at the woman.

"You got pretty blue eyes. Oh, but where are my manners. The name's Nella. Nella Harborson, but most call me Nell."

Killian blinked. The name settled in, but that was about all he could register.

"Killian." he told her softly. "Killian Gryst."

"Well, Killian Gryst, just take to your needed rest and I'll tend to ye. It's the very least I can do for a man in yer kinda state."

With a weak nod, Killian closed his eyes, and who knew how long he slept. An hour, through the night, through the next few days. Even still, with dreams, he was feverish; but in the moment he was just another lost soul to the world.

There was a knock on the door and when Nella opened it the person she saw was Kayden. Kayden had arrived in this town aproxematly two months ago. Initially passing through but his presence had proven timed no better after preventing a plague from spreading to to much people and he had managed to cute most. Nobody asked how or why but he had done it. And all he wanted in return was a place to live in. Saying something about waiting for someone. Ever since he had been the town's physician.

Kayden always seemed to know when medical attention was needed which was quite the feat since he was as blind as a mole.

''Good evening Nell. How is your foot?'' Kayden asked with his usual charming smile. He had treated her after a snake with necrotic poison had bit her. He gave her a polite bow, carrying a doctors bag in one hand and held his staff at the other. He was never seen without a staff and he used it for walking as far as everyone knew.

Naturally Nell let him into her house. It was a curious thing why he'd come here at such an hour. She closed the door after him then looked from Kayden to the sleeping form of Killian on the bed.

"Did you come here because of him?"

Kayden nodded. ''I got a hunch.'' he said calmly. ''Was there anyone with him?'' he had expected a certain someone to be here too. There had not been many futursights without her but he could not hear Silmeria's voice nor felt the aura she tended to emit.

He rubbed his gloved hands together briefly before taking them off and removed his thick coat. ''How long has he been sleeping now?'' he asked. His face with his blind opal eyes, covered with cloth facing towards Nell.

She blinked but shook her head.
"No, it was just him who came into the town. And what a sorry sight he was." HSe looked down at Killian. "A good man hours now I'd say. I think he's gone through hell. So I'll let him sleepf or days if he'd need it."
She studied Kayden. "You ask about another... were you expecting someone else?"

''Yes and no.'' Kayden replied. ''Remember what I said when I got here? I was waiting for someone. That person was supposed to be with him. Silmeria. But she is not here.'' He did not sound disappointed but it still did not remove the fact he had hoped for her to be here.

''First though I will take a look at him.'' He set his staff against the wall and took the doctors bag, setting it down beside where Killian slept and with a stethoscope he listened at Killian's breathing and heart. He looked thoughtfull for a moment until gently making Killian's amputated arm free. ''Interesting. It is recent yet completely healed...'' he took a pot of some kind of fat and rubbed it on before covering it again.

''Hell or not. Waking him up once every three hours has to be done. At least until the following night.'' Kayden replied with a sigh. It was when his hand touched the floor to get on his feet, that he got a startled reaction and his face directed to Silmeria's bag. ''Haha!'' he did not laugh hard though but he looked happy. ''I knew it. He has her bag. Means she is not far away.'' he sighed relieved. Still. It was way to early to be relieved, the weather outside know was deadly for her unless she soared above the clouds. He wondered if she was doing such now.

He slept like a log, and would have continued to do so had the man not suddenly laughed so loud. With a sharp cry, Killian was awake and a knife was drawn and pointed towards Kayden while the one armed soldier backed up against the wall where the bed rested against.

"What.. who... who are you? What are you doing here?"
Then he saw where Kayden was looking and he shoved the blade closer towards the other man.
"Don't touch that or I'll cut you."
And he felt himself trembling, a wildness tingling through his limbs. He was desperate, and he was not about to spurn Silmeria's good will.

''So you give me the choice to either touch it or be cut by you?'' Kayden asked. He always had been a bit of a jester but he knew what Killian meant and directed his head back to Killian. ''Something tells me that you meant you will cut me if I touch it.'' Kayden replied.

He had not laughed that hard now had he. Oh well. Killian had to wake up anyway so it was good. ''My name is Kayden Galwyn. I am a physician. And we seem to share a mutual friend but it seems she has not come here with you. Unusual if she is still that caring type. As much as I'd like to ask about Silmeria though, now you are awake I can do a proper checkup.''

"Silmeria?" Killian blinked. "How do you know her?"

Kayden rolled up his sleeves a little and looked through his own bag, taking out a small box, removing a needle out of it. For someone who had his eyes covered he surely was capable of finding everything he needed and work as if he had sight like anyone else. ''I am going to touch some pressure points. Your eyes at me at all times please and let me know every time you feel pressure and where. I need to see if you've suffered nerve damage.'' he initially seemed to avoid talking about Silmeria but he answered in a short while.

''I met Silmeria a very long time ago. Caring, stubborn, very self sacrificial. There was this... fire inside of her so to say.'' Kayden replied. He sat down beside Killian and pressed gently on Killian's fingers with the not sharp side of the needle.

Killian watched the man work, completely baffled by the situation, but he couldn't deny he was more curious than wary. As the man went about his things, Killian looked them over, or as best he could from his position, before watching him prod at his fingers.

It was then he realized he was still holding his blade and drew his hand back suddenly and looked away.
"F..forgive me," he said, placing the blade beside him, propped against the bed. He then turned to regard the man again, still looking at him- and at his eyes.

"You're a blind doctor?" he found himself questioning before he could think better of it.

Fortunatly the woman here knew he was someone who used magic. How else could he have explained to her how he managed to fix the snake bite that affected her so badly.

Kayden smiled and put down the needle for a moment before removing his blindfold revealing two eyes. They looked like white opals. There was only a vague sign of pupils though.''Initially, I am blind. However, I am a Seer. I can see a variety of different futures. I use that power to see a few seconds ahead of time to see. But can see past too by doing something called hearing the memory of sound. Not to mention being over a millenia old helps. It is not flawless though. Like going to a tavern and someone at the door decides to actually not wait and throw the door open.''

After pressing multiple points from Killian's fingers, hand and arm he made his way to Killian's feet to make sure the nerves there were not damaged. ''Me being a Seer gave me the knowledge of Silmeria coming here with a friend. You. But unfortunatly it resulted in one of the futures where she is not with you. I've been looking for her for centuries.'' he admitted.

Killian had only heard about one man to ever come from Silmeria's lips, and he stiffened at the idea and found himself asking boldly, "Were you her lover?"

((Silmeria had briefly spoken about a seer once she knew but that he died.. That they made games by changing futures etc if they did not like the outcomes he had seen. I do not remember if she said how he died though))

''No. We were friends. Like brother and sister. Not only am I a seer though but I am cursed. And that took quite the toll on my mental state for a long time. I never told her though. She was in a not so happy place either and if she wanted to help to break the curse it would have cost her a cycle. I could not ask that from her and knew she would suggest it if she knew.'' he paused. ''At the least you were with her. What had gotten you separated?''

His heart sank when he realized the nature of their relationship. And also he felt ashamed to admit it was hard for him to believe everything the man was saying. The war had been hard on him, and it was hard to remain anything like the naive boy he had once been upon singing up to join this insanity.

When the question came back to him, Killian couldn't help but frown.

"We were attacked," he began, feeling ashamed. "She urged me to take off. I didn't want to leave her but I...." He licked his dry lips and dropped his gaze. HIs ears burned with shame as he admitted, "But I left. I kept going until I found myself here," he went on dryly.

"I should have stayed... I should have protected her."

''There is no need to blame yourself.'' Kayden said calmly. ''If she wanted you to run, it usually means it would've been dangerous for the both of you to stick together. Silmeria is a blood phoenix and knows most likely more then most others familiar with it, how dangerous it can be. Still. When she wants to save someone it is a brand of magic she relies on the most while she shouldn't.'' He finished checking Killian's body for injury seen and unseen.

''At the least though, you seem to be alright physically. Your nerves at a few places are slightly numb but nothing your body can not fix on it's own. I recommend some rest and having to be awoken once every three hours. Eat hot soup and hope. Not all is lost. She entrusted you her bag. Allows you to be able to carry it. She has every intention to come back to you. With this weather though I do think she needs a bit of help with that.''

Killian felt awful.
"But I'm a soldier.... we are sworn to protect, and she was fighting against my men, those who I have trained and fought along side, those who also swore to protect these lands."
He cringed and looked down to his hand.

"I'm a coward for leaving her," he added carefully, quietly. He closed his hand into a fist. "I should return to her... See if she needs help."

''If you go outside the way you are now you will die and it would be for nothing. You are a soldier. Silmeria once was a general. Not in the same time, but in theory she is your superior if you look at it that way. Are you going to ignore her order? You do not know the state she is in mentally or physically. You are no coward. It often takes bravery in order to leave. Just as much or even more bravery to stand up against others. I will find her and bring her back. Depending on what she did to protect you, you will be everything she has. If you werent, you would not have been allowed to have her bag. Her whole life is in that thing. You need to trust her that she will find you again.'' he spoke clearly. Sure, Kayden could join him and look for her together with him. But if Silmeria in the worst case was in bloodrage then Killian would not stand a chance. Not to mention, Silmeria would not be able to face Killian if she had bloodrage and recovered from it.

''If you insist, I will accompany you. But I will not allow you to just walk into death's arms.''

Killian had a million questions he wanted to ask, but for the life of him, all he could do was choke up and bury his face into his remaining hand. He didn't know what to do. He didn't know what he wanted to do...
All he could think about was wanting to get home, wanting to wake up from this nightmare and to never look back.

"I need to rest," he murmured, trying to sniff back some tears and to cull back any further crying.

Kayden nodded and stood up walking to Silmeria's bag. He thought for a moment before he opened it and put his hand in it. No maggots, or other creepy crawlers. After a moment he retrieved a bottle and a cup. ''Some never change...'' he said softly before opening the bottle and poured some of it's contends into the cup after walking back to Killian. ''Drink this. You will be warm, have no nightmares and rest well. No second cup though. You still need feeling in your nerves properly.'' he offered it to him.

''When you are sleeping, I will be looking for Silmeria. Unless you want me to stay. But you do not need me any longer regarding your physical health.''

Killian looked down at the cup, then back up to Kayden.
"What's in this drink?" he asked, lifting it towards himself, but pausing a few inches before his lips.
"And are you sure it's wise to go after her alone? You don't know those men... Those soldiers. And the weather..."
He supposed he didn't have to go on about how awful the weather was.

''I have survived worse Winters than this. Unless Silmeria found shelter she however will not last. I will be fine. Although I may need to borrow a few things from her bag. You however will have to take the bag with you. Do not leave it behind somewhere. If you leave this place we can only find you with that. Am I clear?'' Kayden spoke. ''As for the drink. It is a herbal drink that eases the mind and body. Silmeria took it if she suffered from nightmares or when she was sick.''

Killian frowned, still holding the drink.
"I really should go with you... If Silmeria's in danger..."

But a noise alerted the pair.

"Someone comes." Came the voice. Killian looked towards the window and heard the woman swear. "Soldiers. Connlaothian soldiers- and a lot o' 'em."

''Splendid.'' Kayden muttered with a tone of sarcasm and took a deep breath. He tapped the bag and pondered before placing his hand in the bag, and retrieved a few things before casting a spell. The bag looked different when Kayden had finished. More worn and full. Some things sticking out such as a map, flask, and Kayden put in the medicine for Killian.

''I drew in a rune on the inside of the bag to change its appearance. As long as that is intact, the bag is cloaked to look like this. You can still get Silmeria's stuff out but seeing as Connlaothians normally loathe magic I recommend not to. At the least not in plain sight. If you need something from her bag that is currently not visable, do not take long to get it. Magical energy will be released when you. Right now all that is visable will be what you need. The medicine and the fat cream to treat your arm with, is in it. Those without permission who look in the bag will only be able to get out what they see. Do not lose the bag. It is Silmeria's only way to track you down. Unless of course you and her have a pact.'' the latter he doubted. The air felt different. Although other then Kayden, probably not sure what it was. Kayden had removed all unnatural magic traces. Then he took a bundle of dried sage. Lightning it with the nearest fire, walked a round so the house had the lovely soft scent of sage before throwing the rest in the fire place. Put on some good Winter boots and staff. They had arrived sooner then he had hoped actually but still. Silmeria needed him. Probably.

He made sure his blindfold was on before joining the woman's side. ''Remember what I told you those months back? I trained my two physician apprentices well. They will take care of the village from now on. Thank you for keeping my secret. I will make sure you get compensated for it.'' he said to the woman. ''And Killian. I promise you. I will bring Silmeria back. I need to take my leave. Despite my gifts I do not give off magic if I do not use it but for now, we will part ways. Take your medicine and hopefully we will meet again soon.''

After putting on his coat and had reclaimed his doctor's bag, he opened the door.