At Least They're Not Apples

[Zero]

Tesha had never been good at staying furious with Kenny, but her anger had not cooled yet. Instinctively she lashed out at him when he grabbed her, a foot coming up to kick back against his shin even as her dope pulled her tight against his chest. Her blue eyes fell closed, pain and rage crossing her face at how much she wished to simply lean back into him and be held, but knowing that it would just be brushed off like nothing.

She felt like nothing. Tears threatened to fall from her eyes as she wallowed in that horrid feeling. Tesha meant nothing to him. Which was ridiculous. And she knew it was ridiculous. Not being wanted in the way she wanted didn't mean he cared about her any less as a friend. It just felt like it.

"LIAR!" She snarled, eyes flying open as she renewed her struggles in his grasp. It would have been easy enough to teleport away. Tesha just didn't want to. With a sound of incoherent anger she jabbed her elbow into his gut as hard as she could. Love her? Love her? "You don't love me! If you loved me you wouldn't lie to me. You wouldn't drag your name from my lips just to turn around and reject me."

Kenny had pestered her relentlessly to know the name of the man she loved and had dismissed her feelings for him like nothing. He didn't want her the way she wanted him and she'd have to figure out a way to learn to live with that. Or to change his mind.

[GoblinFae]

Kenneth grunted at the kick in his shins but refused to let go. He had expected nothing less from her as she was a woman of fire and not to be contained even by the likes of him. To be called a liar though set his ever low-burning ire aflame. The elbow to the ribs was just the icing on the cake that forced him to fall backwards with her still clutched tightly in his arms. Then, reacting with the grace and speed he was known for only in combat he quickly rolled them so that he had her pinned between the earth and himself.

"I am not a liar," he hissed into her ear, the pain of her accusation crystal clear in his tone. "I love you more than you could ever know! I love you so much that it hurts to breathe when I'm with you but I never want to leave you because it hurts even more when you're gone. I love you even though I don't deserve you. I love you even when I know that you deserve so much better. You are my first and only friend and I would sacrifice anything and everything to see you happy. I don't have much in this world so don't you dare call me a liar Tesha Nallvir when all I have to my name is my word! Don't you dare!"

[Zero]

It was always disconcerting when one was faced with the sensation of falling. Tesha tried to squirm from Kenneth's grip, but let out a grunt when falling turned into being pinned to the ground with that insurmountable weight on top of her. All joking aside, no matter how much, badly, or often she might tease her friend, he could be a force to be reckoned with as much as anyone - even her.

From this new position Tesha couldn't even move her arms to try to throw Kenny off or get leverage to roll them again. An almost feral growl was coming from her now as she listened to the angry voice hissing into her ear.

"All you have? What about me? What about my family? You have us. You've always had us. Don't you dare fucking insult my family for everything they've done for you - for all the love we've given you. Don't insult me by claiming you love me in one breath and the next bemoaning how you don't deserve me when I would throw myself at you if you would only acknowledge it!" Even knowing the struggle was futile Tesha did her best to break free, to do something, to do anything.

[GoblinFae]

"I'm an orphan, Tesha," he reminded her in a defeated voice. "Without your family's support and pity I have nothing. I have no way to repay them. I have nothing, don't you understand? You're everything I'm not Tesha. You're everything I could never be and I would only bog you down. I can't support you, I can't care for you. People can't live on love alone," Kenneth whispered, feeling like crying as his voice cracked.

"I love you and because I love you I don't want to see my best friend wasting her life with a loser with no family and no prospects like me. Please, Tesh-what do you mean acknowledge it?" He paused in surprise, the words just starting to sink in for him but not in a way that left him warm and fuzzy on the inside. Instead he felt dread and fear. In his surprise his grip on her loosened as he became distracted by his own spinning thoughts.

[Zero]

"My family's pity?" Tesha immediately growled, her struggles becoming almost violent as her anger rose at such an accusation. Her family had never looked down on him, had never asked or even implied that some repayment for their love for him was needed. Her parents practically took him in as one of their own and he insulted them again and again right to her face!

"By the Shadows you're a fucking idiot!" Why did she love this stupid, foolish boy?! "Who said I need supported? Where the hell do you think my father gets what he needs to support our family? The Shadows! The city gives us everything we need, food, shelter, care! You act as if we would be starving beggars on the streets if we were together. Have you so little regard for all that has been given to you through the years by the Shadows?"

He wasn't holding her as tightly and she brought her elbow back into his gut and scrambled out from under him, turning on him still quite furious. "Shadows take you, Kenneth Kent. Fuck you if you would reject me for so dumb a reason."

[GoblinFae]

Kenneth squealed in pain, immediately releasing his grip on her entirely as she stormed off and screeched at him. Part of him heard her words, understood the truth in her points, and even agreed with her while another part continued to feel worthless and incapable of providing her with the care that he felt she deserved beyond the necessities the city provided its people with. Yet, deep in his heart, Kenneth was still coming to terms with how deep her sincerity was, how dearly she loved him and most of all how callously and blindly cruel he had been pushing her feelings aside in the face of his own insecurity and fear.

The worst realization of all for him though was that he was too much of a coward to say so. He did not have the courage to get up off the ground and sweep her off her feet until she forgot all their arguments. He was too weak to apologize for fear that he would anger her further. Kenneth hated himself. In his mind he was a disgusting piece of shit.

Tired and defeated he dragged himself back to his feet and shook his head. "Tesha I-" Kenneth shook his head more, unable to look her in the eye. "You're right." He desperately wanted to say he was sorry yet the words were locked in his throat. Dragging them out was like sawing through rock with a spoon. "I'm sorry," he choked. "I'm sure you don't believe me and I certainly don't deserve your forgiveness because you're right but...I don't know. But nothing I guess."

[Zero]

It was hard to try to contain that kind of seething rage. The kind that only really hit you when your heart was hurting so much the only way to keep it from breaking was to funnel that pain into white hot anger. Kenneth didn't mean to, but the things he said felt like a slap to the face. Not only to her, but her entire family.

They loved him. All of them adored him. He wasn't just some poor, pitiful orphan boy to them. Kenneth was as good as family. Shadows, her mother liked him more than her! Tears were prickling at her eyes, threatening to fall.

Her shoulders hunched up and she turned away from him. Tesha normally enjoyed hearing him tell her she was right and he was wrong, but right now it just felt like more stabbing jabs to the chest. Why did he have to be so stubborn? Why did she have to be so stubborn? They would both suffer less if they could just relent.

"I don't need any man to take care of me." She hissed through tears. "So don't you fucking worry about some stupid notion of providing for me. I've always been just as capable of looking out for myself as any of you stupid boys. Better than most of you!"

Tesha lifted her chin, still trying to force the tears away. "I love you, Kenny. I have for a long time, and I will keep loving you. If...if you don't want me. That's fine. But I will always want you."

There really wasn't much else for her to say, was there? Stiffly she began walking again.

[GoblinFae]

'I'm not rejecting you,' he wanted to say but the words were locked within his throat. Kenneth felt completely defeated. He shuffled after her quietly, hot tears streaming down his face unbidden as they headed for home. His own mind turned against him, berating and howling at him for being so cruel and foolish towards the one woman he loved above all else.

The sight of the approaching entrance to their underground city did not even bring him the joy that it normally did. Home felt useless when he had most likely destroyed not only all chances with Tesha as lovers but destroyed their long friendship as well. Like a man walking to the gallows he headed to her home. Perhaps Constance and Tershal could knock some sense in him, or murder him. Right now either option would work as long as it put him out of his devastating misery.

[Zero]

Tesha barely saw where she was going, the tears blurred her vision as she did her best to keep her head high. She refused to break down and cry right now. Not where he could see. It was a good thing her feet knew the way home so well, because she passed through the entrance to the city and did not wait up for Kenneth.

No, she walked as fast as she could without running. Tesha didn't run from anything. Certainly not from a stupid man that hurt her feelings.

The front door slammed behind her as she made it home at last, and her bedroom door followed suit. Only then did she allow herself to break down sobbing as she threw herself on her bed, burying her face in a pillow as she let out her misery.

Her parents had tried to welcome her home, but she'd ignored them. Tershal knocked softly before going in, sitting on the edge of his daughter's bed and gently rubbing her back as she cried. Like he'd done all her life. It didn't matter how old Tesha got, she was still his baby girl, and it hurt him to see her so upset.

Constance didn't try to comfort her daughter, as soon as Kenny walked through the front door he'd be beset with the mother hen. "Look at you poor dear. You're back late and starving no doubt. I've got a nice soup on with fresh bread and butter. Come have some supper, sweetie. You'll feel better."

[GoblinFae]

Kenneth winced at the sounds of his dearest of friends stomping and slamming doors. The only reason he even followed her was because he knew if he did not then Constance would come hunt him down. At least this way he could prove he was alive and intact before trying to make his excuses and head back to...well anywhere else that was not there.

"Thank you Mother Constance but, I'm afraid I can't rightly stay this evening. Tesha could really use some of your attention more than I. I'll uh just come back later," he tried, scratching the back of his head awkwardly as he shifted to back away from her.

[Zero]

"Nonsense!" Constance sniffed, eyeing him with an all too familiar motherly sternness. Of course she knew Tesha was very upset in her room right now, and she knew that Kenneth was probably the cause for that tantrum she'd caught the tiniest glimpse of when her daughter stormed in. "Tershal's with her now, I'm sure everything will be fine."

Knowing the stubbornness of her sweet boy, Constance had no issue grabbing him by the arm and pulling him towards the kitchen. "You look positively wretched, sweetheart. Sit and eat and tell me what's got you two so upset. You'll feel better."

[GoblinFae]

"I assure you, I'm quite well. Thank you though," Kenneth said becoming slightly more panicked as Constance attempted to lead him to the table. The last thing he wanted was to be here while Tesha was upset and likely to come storming back out and see him there. "Please Mother Constance I uhhh should really be off to report how everything went and all. And my um Aunt is probably worried sick waiting for me," he stuttered while grasping at straws to come with excuses and pull away. There was no way that Rowan would of course be worried. She had every faith in the boy and had always allowed him to do what he liked.

[Zero]

"You are not well and your aunt knows right where you're at, Kenneth." Constance told him sweetly, which was a stark contrast to the way she grabbed his ear and finished leading him to the table. She was a kind, motherly woman, but not the most patient with nonsense. Tugging him into a chair, she gave a simple command. "Sit."

She bustled about for a moment and placed a bowl of chicken and vegetable soup in front of him, and a thick slice of toast to go with it. "Now stop being contrary and eat. You know that I can't let you go hungry, and I'm far more stubborn than you are. Besides, I have a plate of your favorite cookies for dessert. Whatever is the matter can be fixed right up if you don't go running off at the first chance you get. Now tell me why Tesha is in her room bawling her eyes out instead of out here scarfing down her supper and picking on you."

That was how it would and should have been when the pair got home from working together.

[GoblinFae]

Kenneth did his best not to complain as he was suddenly dragged by his ear into sitting. For such a small woman Constance certainly knew how to get things done. The young ranger did not dare argue with her further for fear of her doing something worse. Instead he stayed put even if he did sulk a bit and hang his head in defeat. Not even the mention of her amazing cooking and baking was enough to rouse his heart though from its guilt and sadness at hurting Tesha.

He winced at the very mention that Tesha was crying and then dropped his head into his arms on the table. "I hurt her," he declared, his voice muffled by the table. "She hates me and I broke her heart. I don't even deserve to be here."

[Zero]

"Of course you deserve to be here." Constance scowled at him. She knew the boy well enough to expect his resistance and his sulking once he realized she was not to be denied. It pained her, with a mother's concern, to see either of them so upset. Kenneth was not of her body, but the boy was as much her baby as Tesha.

"Tesha doesn't hate you." She said gently, coming around to lightly squeeze his shoulder and smooth her other hand over his hair as he kept his face down. "Why don't you tell me what happened?"

[GoblinFae]

"She does hate me," he protested sullenly, resting his chin on his arms petulantly. "May I have a cookie now please?" Kenneth asked with round, pleading, wet eyes and a large pout before continuing to tell his story sadly. "I told Tesha I loved her and she got really, really made at me. And now I've completely ruined it forever and we'll never be friends again," he finished, choking on a sob that forced his face back into the comfort of his arms where he could hide his tears.

[Zero]

Constance placed the whole plate of cookies next to him. She could never say no to that face! If only she could fix everything right that second and make sure none of her babies ever hurt. Ah, but that was beyond even her mothering.

"That doesn't sound right at all." It had taken a mighty effort for her not to squeal when Kenneth said he'd told Tesha he loved her. She'd always thought they would be a wonderful and adorable little couple! Constance had been hoping that they'd get together for a few years now, she'd always suspected they might since the day they'd taken little Kenneth into their family fold.

"Tesha adores you. I know she does. Why would she be angry at you for loving her?" That was definitely the question. She made little comforting rubs on his back, feeling horrible to know that she had not one, but two, crying children. What had her daughter done to upset him so?!

[GoblinFae]

Kenneth sneaked a hand out to swipe a cookie before dragging it into his self-made mini-fort. He nibbled on the cookie slowly before finally sitting up and taking large bites out of it until it was gone and reaching for another. "She's angry," he sniffled while swallowing a mouthful, "because I told her the truth and she disagreed. She hates me now. I broke her heart." Kenneth's voice cracked as tears openly fell down his cheeks. He wanted nothing more than a hug but was too ashamed to ask for one from the mother of the woman he loved.

"I told her I'm not worthy enough to be with her and she lost her mind. It was terrifying."

[Zero]

Constance wasn't sure what to really make of the whole situation. Although she had to agree with her daughter on something. "Kenneth Kent don't you dare say things like that in this house. You are like my own son, and it would make me so happy for you and Tesha to be together."

She pulled him into a fierce hug. There was little she would love more than to see Kenny with her daughter as more than just friends! Constance wanted grandchildren, and if any man were going to give them to her with Tesha it would definitely be Kenneth. She knew how much her daughter cared for the darling boy.

[GoblinFae]

It was all too much for him. The moment Constance embraced him, Kenneth turned into a blubbering, sobbing mess. He clung to her fiercely, crying his heart out onto her shoulder as he did so. "She deserves so much more," he sobbed in a cracking voice. "I love her so much and I only want the best for her! That isn't me! Why won't she see that? I just want her happy. I just want my friend back." On and on he went, crying rivers into Constance's clothes as all of his pent-up emotions came surging forward and he shook with the force of it all.