Kiyan wanted to melt with relief when Zarak's stern composure broke, turning suddenly to that grin that Kiyan was familiar with, and he gave a small, weak laugh of his own when Zarak slapped his back and told him not to worry, that he wouldn't tell...and that his face was priceless. "Heh...yeah...really?" Probably was now, too, he was so damned relieved; Zarak's face seemed more suited for grins than sternness, and seeing him so suddenly suspicious and stern had been really disconcerting, because it didn't seem like he was the type to get that way much, and...yeah, the change there had been scary. That look had reminded him of the adults of his tribe far too much, and that was a look he'd come to associate with "I'm screwed".
They wouldn't pat him on the back and tell him not to worry, or that it probably wasn't a big deal! And they certainly wouldn't let him in on any of their dirty little secrets from their younger years. After all, they were supposed to set a good example. Or something like that.
And they most certainly wouldn't hear him out on the full side of his story. Not when he was so obviously in the wrong.
"I promise to keep any of your secrets," Kiyan told Zarak softly, still reeling slightly from the whole situation, as he was guided back to their fire. "Thank you, by the way..." Maybe if the others in his tribe were more like Zarak he'd be more inclined to tell the truth. But there wasn't much incentive to be honest when truth or lie bore the same results. He still couldn't believe how different the man was...understanding, easy to talk to, non-judgmental, and here he was promising to let Kiyan in on some of the dirt from his own life, relating to him! He liked him more and more by the second. He just hoped he didn't do anything else in the future that would invoke that stern streak; seeing that was enough to give him a mini anxiety attack!
As Zarak took his place by the fire, Kiyan took a seat across from him with his legs folded beneath him. Guess it was time to spill everything, then. The sooner he got it all out, the better he'd feel.
Once Zarak was settled, he took a deep breath. "Alright...um...this is sort of embarrassing, to be honest..." he began, shifting his eyes down to his lap. "But...alright. So...a few months ago, I, ah, met this girl, Maricha. She wasn't from my tribe, but from one way further up the coast, a week's travel away, and she came with a small group of her people sent to trade. Normally, they'd only stay about a week or two to trade, rest, catch up on any news, and then be on their way back to their families, but one of them got bit by a mosquito and got real sick and feverish, so they decided to stay until he was better and could make the ride back. They stayed about five weeks total...our shaman had to work with the sick guy a lot, and he almost didn't make it, but she'd seen that kind of thing before...it doesn't happen a lot, but...ah..." He realized suddenly he was rambling. He didn't need to give a whole lecture on the history of trading and strange illnesses! "Ah, anyway...
"Maricha. She was my age, and pretty and smart, and she came with her uncle to trade her baskets. And...we hung out a lot...she was the youngest one that had come, and...we had a lot in common...and...yeah. So...while everyone else was busy doing their thing, not paying any attention to us, we'd go off together...I'd show her around...we'd talk...and...well..." He cleared his throat. "She always told me her uncle couldn't see us together, because he was overprotective and said she was too young for stuff like that. I was fine with that...even when...you know...things got more serious...because I liked her, and she said the same, and she promised she'd come on more trading trips to visit and when she was considered old enough by her family we could tell them and everything, and until then it'd be a secret and...well...one thing lead to another and eventually...a few days before she left...um..."
Kiyan hadn't raised his eyes once, and his tan face had darkened considerably by now in embarrassment. "Well...uh...yeah...we were together and stuff...alone...you know...like that...and...and..." He grimaced, and his voice took on a miserable, almost violated note as he bowed his head even lower, his cheeks burning. Ugh, this was so damned embarassing. "Her damned uncle had followed Maricha because he'd been wondering where she'd been disappearing to, and he found us! Like that. It...it was not pretty..." He cleared his throat again. "Anyway...he dragged us both back to my tribe, yelling the whole way, and somewhere in all that I found out that Maricha was...engaged. To a hunter back at her tribe; couldn't make the trip because he was needed. Arranged marriage sort of deal. I guess she didn't like him. She never talked to me after that, but...I like to think that...I guess..." It was better than thinking she'd played him for no reason!
"But...but then she started going off about how I seduced her! At first it sounded really funny...really ridiculous...I mean...I trusted her, and I don't think I look that type, or act it or whatever...but, uh...joke was on me, the uncle bought it of course." With a bitter sigh, he glanced briefly up at Zarak. "My tribe did too...bloody shaman's a woman, and Maricha put on the tears, and the man's supposed to be the responsible one because the woman's the meek one so...so...but like I would have thought she was engaged! Or thought to ask! She didn't bring it up and she told me that uncle story and all that other stuff! And I didn't 'seduce' her into nothing! But they wouldn't listen.
"So, long story short...the leaders and shaman of my tribe worked out a solution with the uncle that the uncle thought would work for him and Maricha's man, and that woud punish me. They'd take me back to their tribe...I'd belong to their tribe...and...well...among some of the things I heard, one of the last things I heard was...that they'd marry me off to, ah, some older lady that lost her husband recently! I don't know if they were joking or what, but the servitude part sounded better! Even getting the crap beaten out of me by Maricha's man sounded better! Well...that idea was never 'officially' posed, but...I know it'd happen! They were going to tell him when we all got to their tribe! A hunter!" Kiyan shivered, fidgeting with his necklace. "He'd kill me and make it look like an accident!
"My brothers weren't any help, either...they're all I have left anymore, but they're all married and have their own business to worry about...they thought the marriage thing was funny, and that...yeah...I'd put myself in that situation, so I had to deal with the consequences...they probably just want me out of their hair. But anyway...that was the night I left. I was kept under watch of course...because that was kind of a big issue, certainly doesn't look good on my own tribe...but everyone falls asleep eventually, and no one's used to keeping watch like that, so once my watchers fell asleep, I grabbed a few things that were in the room with me, slipped away and ran. And...I found this place. But...I didn't have much with me...and...well...I've had to go back a few times...get some supplies...and...so...I've been here since...about a week."
Long story finished, he looked back up at Zarak. Whew. He hadn't meant it to turn into so much of a rant, but...but he couldn't help but be bitter about a lot of that, of not being believed, and of being backstabbed to begin with. He wasn't sure which part bothered him more. "So...that's why I can't go back...and then I'll probably be in even more trouble because I ran away and stole stuff. I didn't want to, but I'll bring it back. Whenever I can go backâ€"and not worry about getting given away. If I'm not found first. I'll...probably have to move from this place soon...dont know how long before they look, if they even are looking..."
In a strange way, while he hoped they weren't looking, he would also be hurt to know they weren't. Odd how that worked.
But whatever the case, now that he'd spilled everything, it felt like a huge weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He didn't have to hide anything from Zarak...and that was a great feeling.
Even if it didn't make any of this any less embarrassing.
"To be honest...I'm not even sure how much I really want to go back..." he muttered at length, lowering his eyes down to the sand.