Every inch of Zahir's body had grown gradually sharper, harder as he listened to Fahru speak. Lapis didn't even think it was anger, or his pride, not really. It was...wariness. The kind of tension held in a hunted animal.
Which was more than a little surprising. And confusing. She had always seen the djinn play the lion, never the gazelle he chased.
She almost shrank back herself under the perfumer's suddenly stony gaze, and was only save from doing so because that look was not directed at her, but rather her companion. She watched, wide-eyed, unable to say anything--and what would she have said, really? Nothing Fahru had said about their complacency seemed wrong.
"...It would hurt her."
She jerked as though Zahir's words had physically struck her, and without thinking yelped, "What?"
But the djinn wasn't looking at her. He hadn't moved from his carelessly sprawled pose in the chair, but his jaw was tight as he fixed his eyes on Fahru's face. "Djinn...we are bound. By contract, by blood, by magic, by all three at once. Even the worst of us, who seek to destroy, may only do so through careful plotting, countless tiny loopholes in their agreements to exploit." He shrugged, and for a moment seemed as though he wanted to look away, but then drew in a breath and held his gaze. "My contract forbids my from harming the one who holds it. And the truth would hurt her."
Lapis gaped openly. Zahir still wouldn't look at her.
"We serve. Badly sometimes, dangerously even, but we are servants. Nothing more. And...if the truth...were that I did not want to leave her service...for reasons even I cannot fully understand..." He spoke so slowly, carefully, refusing to look at Lapis--and she realized he was doing exactly what he said. Working around the contract. He wasn't telling her a truth that could hurt her.
What does he mean by that...?
"If it were true that she has been...a rare spot of compassion in a long, long life, I still could not tell her. Because even service to a kind master is service coerced through contract, and that is--"
"Slavery."
Lapis felt a yawning pit open in her stomach. She covered her face with her hands and bowed forward as the realization struck her. And oh, he was right. It did hurt. And it hurt worse for being obvious, if she gave it more than a passing thought. More than a moment of frustrated pondering.
Because if she had known, if she had understood, she would have done anything to free him. And...that was not what he wanted. He would never be free, not really, merely left to waste away in a magic amulet until the next master picked it up. And who knew if that person would be kind.
Zahir was still not looking at her, all the easy, sloping grace of his body hardened into broken edges sharp enough to cut. "So yes, Craftsman Fahru. Honesty would make things clear. But to understand would bring her pain, and so I could not speak the words unless to one who understood what I am, and who asked...even knowing that should she hear, it would hurt."
Finally, he looked to her, though she could not see it. She was huddled in the chair, still covering her face, shoulders shaking as she clearly fought back sobs. His expression softened, just a bit. "And even if my contract did not bind me...that was never something I wished for her."