Spirits of the Earth

Community => General Discussion => Writing => Topic started by: Klezmer Gryphon on January 07, 2016, 09:49:54 AM

Title: Sonnet for the forgotten creature
Post by: Klezmer Gryphon on January 07, 2016, 09:49:54 AM
Thou art a creature beautiful and fair;
A servant to the gods of ancient lore.
Beast mighty, thou art monarch earth and air;
Object of awe for the peasants of yore.

In thee, find I paradox, fair creature;
Favoured by the gods, but by man reviled;
Trusted guard, yet hoarder of treasure.
What art thou, creature that hath me beguiled?

O, noble beast, wherefore hath time left thee
in the trail of the shy unicorn and
fire of the dragon high and mighty,
confined thee to some long forgotten land?

Despair not, fair creature! Thy name lives on
and, I repeat here, thy name is griffon.




I wrote this sonnet here just this past week as an assignment for my Advanced English class, and normally I'd just chuck assignments in the bin after grades were taken. But, after looking it over, I figured it'd be worth putting it up here for some constructive criticism.

The subject of the poem, if you couldn't tell by the last word of the poem, is a griffon (or gryphon, griffin, or any other of the numerous spellings that have been used). Comments pertaining to meter would be very appreciated, as getting the iambic pentameter right was the hardest thing for me, and I know that there will be errors in there. Anyway, enjoy the poem!
Title: Re: Sonnet for the forgotten creature
Post by: JackieCat on January 07, 2016, 11:14:49 AM
Wow.  This is beautiful!  I can't find any criticism to give, constructive or not. 

Keep up the great work! :))