Have I Got a Deal for You! (Nightcandle)

[Anonymous]

((Here's a piccie of the duo in this post: Click me! Cookie is the one being err flattened, and 'philia is doing the flattening. See? They're perfect brothel material XD))

For a while, Cookie was sure he'd gotten used to having a demon with obvious mental problems around. Mostly, because the moron had been able to quell some of his weirdness while they traveled from the coast to the town of Ketra. He still had his moments however, but Cookie was, shudder, getting used to them. Not giving him any death threats, not threatening him period, and even making efforts to talk to the freak. Even though he found it odd to talk to someone that agreed with everything he said, wouldn't stop calling him 'Master' and referred to himself in a strangely distant way.

Cookie had to admit, having someone around that would ask 'how high' when he said jump was getting to him. It would have made him feel high and mighty, if he'd been stupid enough to believe something like that. This was more like all that what'sitcalled karma coming back on him. Of course, since he hadn't been distinctly good or evil he'd gotten a half assed reward.

Of course, that all meant nothing now.

As with everything, it all started so normally. He was absently walking through Ketra's streets, not really doing much other than taking his surroundings. This was the place he wanted to try settling down a while, mostly since he never lived there and didn't think he knew anyone that lived there. Most importantly, the Dire Harpist didn't have any sects there. He didn't want to see any of his brothers and sisters for a good, long time.

Then it happened. 'philia had been following behind him, as usual, when the demon suddenly had a mental breakdown, grabbed hold of his tiny white wings and yanked him backwards. Cookie didn't imagine that insane demons would have any idea of how sensitive wings were, but he'd assumed 'philia wouldn't ever do something so... stupid. It hurt, it wasn't the worst pain he'd ever gone through but it came out of nowhere and sent a cross of pain down his back and across his shoulders. He'd screamed, it was the only way he could react to being manhandled so roughly. Before he knew it he was facing 'philia, well before 'philia had put his head against his chest and started begging him not to go any further before going into a spiel about how unworthy he was to have asked such a thing.

It must have made a lovely scene. Himself, staring into space because this wasn't supposed to be happening, his little wings twitching through spasms of pain; and the idiot demon, bent over to rub his head into his chest because was more than a bit taller, with that sentient hair of his coiling around one his arms like a snake. Goddess the freak was weird enough looking without drawing attention to himself!

Bastard, asshole, freak, moron. Grrr.... this was the last straw!

Cookie shook his head to snap back into himself and kneed 'philia in the gut. The demon's next line of nonesense came out as a whoosh and he sank down to his knees, his hands sliding off Cookie's arms, his damn hair staying put. No matter, he was exactly where Cookie wanted him.

"That's it," Cookie hissed, pulling an arm in to slap the demon. Which he would have done if the motion hadn't teased a new spasm of pain from his wings. He winced and set his arm back where it was slowly, cursing under his breath all the while.

"This one is truly sorry Master," 'philia gasped, lowering himself towards the ground more. "There is nothing that would take this horrible thing away. Your humble demon will do anything to absolve this, even though it is something that can never be erased."

"Goddess-damn you! I told you never to touch me! NEVER! EVER!"

"Master-"

"Stop talking! Your damn voice annoys me!" Cookie was happily not noticing the larger crowd his screaming fit was drawing. Then his head started pounding, his wings joining in soon after. Goddess,  his wings were probably dislocated or something. Ugh, all that pain made him too tired to scream at 'philia. All he wanted to do was go curl up in a corner and die... whatever would make the pain go away. So, he did just that, minus the corner. Curling up right there in the street. It didn't make either headache or wingache go away, but after all he'd just lain down not two seconds ago.

'philia perked his eyebrows when Master layed down all of a sudden. He must have really hurt him when he tugged at his wings. Not that he meant to grab them after all, they were just the first thing he had been able to get his hands on. They had gotten pretty big after Master's little 'episode'. Gah! What if Master was going to die? That was not good. 'philia crawled over to Master's head and gave him his best sympathetic look. "Master? Are you alright?"

"go to hell..."

"This one will bring you aid!" 'philia announced, uncoiling his hair from Master's arm, jumping to his feet and dashing off. While that was dramatic, it did not help him. Where would someone be that could help Master?

It figured that the first time 'philia ran off on him he'd be too paralyzed with pain to do anything about it. Damndamndamndamn.

'philia, running purely on instinct, stopped in front of a building with a mahogany door. He liked this building. Something about it just arrested his attention. Surely there had to be someone in here that could help his Master, or knew someone that could help him. 'philia walked right up to that door and knocked, taking a step back afterwards and puttin his hands behind his back, his braid swishing side to side with anticipation.

That poor door wasn't getting a break today. First it had the starving woman, and now a pale skinned demon in an odd getup. His white slacks and blue slipper-shoes were normal enough but his shirt was simply the high collar, a line of buttons and the tail worn over a little blue striped white corset. The sleeves, the same material as the slacks with blue flames at their cuffs which were longer than his arms, were tied to his shoulders with little blue ribbons. A strip of blue ribbon was tied around the braid that swished steadily while he waited.

(Post transfer completed!! ^^)

[Anonymous]

Jofei jogged to the door, picking up the thick oak stick that all bouncers used in case someone got too...out of hand.
So far, he'd only ever used to the pole to corral people out of the brothel. He'd never had to crack someone over the head with it.
Despite his intimdating form at a good 6'3" inches and very muscular, Jofei was a big softie. A metallic short-sleeved shirt hugged his chest, and was tucked into his crimson pants. They were form-fitting, but not really to the point of being tight. These in turn dissapeared into his rugged black boots.

Opening the door, eyes the color of new leaves blinked at the male at the door. Or rather, to his braid, which was...
Moving.
Jofei's own hair was the brilliant color of the sea, that clear, crisp blue. It reached to below his shoulders, but was currently caught in a horsetail at the nape of his neck.
His skin was dark, making the silver shirt stand out that much more.

Ok Jofei, stop staring at that odd braid.
"Hello, can I help you?"

[Anonymous]

((I got kidnapped by Life - damn you life!! *shaketh the fist at it* ))

Out of habit, 'philia let his eyes rest on the doorstep while he waited for an answer. As he waited he thought about whether he knew anyone that died because their wings were yanked. It didn't help that philia barely knew anyone with wings - what he did know sent a wave of true terror coursing up and down his spine. Flies died when you pulled off their wings. Died! Lived no more!

'philia gulped, he didn't want to kill Master. Not that it'd be hard to find a new one, he just didn't like killing them. Killing a master was one of the few things that made 'philia feel like the evil scoundrel demon he was.

Then the door opened! 'philia looked up - way up, the man that answered the door was very tall and carried a big stick. 'philia was positively elated to see the man, his swishing hair stopped imitating a pendelum, the end curling up like a scorpion's tail before falling to a 'normal' limp position and a delighted grin spread across his lips.

"Dear Sir," he began, dropping to his knees and clasping his hands in front of him. "Please, please, dearest sir," he continued leaning forward in a complete grovel. "This unworthy one's Master has collapsed in the street and may be dying as surely as you stand listening to this pleading voice. Dearest sir if it pleases you take pity on a poor creature and lend your aid to it's most worthy Master. The debt would be too large for this poor beggar to ever repay but this one will do all that is possible to repay a kind sir!"

[Anonymous]

(Lmao! I too have been kidnapped by Life before! That dastardly villain...>_<)

Jofei couldn't help it. His bright green eyes followed the hair all the way until the point where it stopped.
That...was so...incredibly odd...
Of course, it couldn't compare to what happened next.

At the very beginning of this bizarre display, Jofei had half a mind to think the stranger was going to try and sell him something.
But no. It ended up being far, far stranger.
Jofei could naught but blink at the person groveling at his feet. He'd never actually had someone do that before...
And half of him wondered if this was some sort of scam.

But he couldn't afford to say no if it wasn't. If someone was hurt...

Jofei knelt down and gently tugged on the strange person's upper arm, trying to get them to sit up.
"You may call me Jofei, and I'd be glad to help you. Can you lead me to this master of yours?" His voice was naturally soft and gentle, which helped others not be so frightened of his dominating stature. The pole was still held firmly in one large hand, just in case he should need it...
But he prefered to give people the benefit of the doubt. Besides, they had a doctor here that could easily take care of this person's friend. Why shouldn't he help?

(Eh, that was crap...>_< Sorry...)

[Anonymous]

'philia's snapped up when his arm was touched, as though the big man had hit a lever which caused said action when pressed. As the man spoke, 'philia had a hard time reigning in his excitement - the end of his braid began to twitch back and forth rapidly and his face cracked into a wide grin.

The braid didn't remain contently twitching for long, it shot up and wound itself around Jofei's wrist, it's owner shooting to his feet soon afterward and bowing so low that one could imagine him nearly yanking his hair free of his scalp. "Most generous Sir, there is no way this unworthy one can offer thanks for such kindness."

'philia's words were followed by his hair giving Jofei's wrist several tugs, as if it were a proper hand. "This one's Master isn't fair from where you stand, dear Sir!" He exclaimed before he started walking briskly, seemingly intent on leading Jofei around by the hair... his own hair.

Once they were on the main road 'philia stopped and pointed to a crowd of people around a black smudge. "There!" he announced before racing towards the crowd, his braid still firmly coiled around Jofei's wrist. 'philia leapt between one bowlegged man's legs and crawled the rest of the way to the black smudge; which at close range was a man with a mop of silver hair curled up like a cat. The black was his robe and the bit of the soles of his boots, a pair of tiny white wings that sprouted between his exposed shoulderblades spasmed. The man was growling something in a foreign language, cursing, unless the language was one of those that naturally sounded hostile.

"Master lives!" 'philia exclaimed, finally looking over his shoulder at Jofei.

The growling got more hostile. Definitely cursing....

[Anonymous]

Jofei blinked down at the hair that was now wrapped around his wrist. Why did he get the distinct feeling this wouldn't end well...?
At the tugs, Jofei had just enough time to lay the large oak pole inside the door before 'philia was off and he had to trot to keep from yanking the poor guy's hair out of his head.
The door slammed shut behind him

Down the street they went, only pausing long enough for Jofei's bright green eyes to take in the crowd surrounding someone's black form. And then they were off again, for what Jofei had to assume was this 'philia's master.
...and then the little guy ducked under some poor old bugger's legs, and Jofei had to act quickly to keep from barralling into the man.
"Excuse me."
With his free arm, he carefully picked the bow-legged man up and set him down next to him, saving himself from also trying to crawl between his legs.

Kneeling down next to the winged, cursing man, Jofei looked him over. What was wrong with him?
He could see no blood, no wounds...
"Sir? Sir, are you alright? I'm here to help, my name is Jofei. What's wrong sir?"

[Anonymous]

The man on the ground tilted his head toward the new speaker, wincing a little bit. His little wings twitched again and he scowled.

Cookie was still pissed at 'philia, even if he'd gone off and found him help. Not that he really needed anything besides time to let his wings re-cumbobulate and wouldn't have needed to if 'philia kept his paws to himself. Even though he'd come to a conclusion that 'philia saw something that scared him enough to do something so stupid while lying there, he wasn't about to forgive the demon. A simple 'Stop blahblahblahblah' would have at least made him pause for a second to scowl at 'philia.

Now this helpful person... or helpless victim he wasn't sure which one he was yet, was asking him what was wrong. Cookie was all to glad to tell him.

"He's what's wrong with me," he growled, looking directly at the guilty party.

Whose face screwed up in an expression of complete and utter misery and who put said face in the ground and sniffed. "Master isn't lying good sir, this most horrible one is responsible for his current discomfort. Master needs to be taken out of the street and to someplace he can rest, the ground must be so uncomfortable for him. This one will get his righteous due when it comes time."

"Don't listen to him!" Cookie yelled suddenly, jumping to his feet and swaying unsteadily. Which wasn't such a good plan... it almost hurt as bad as the inital pulling. He just had to tough it out a little bit. Just a little bit. "He doesn't - Goddess.Damn..." He groaned and slowly laid back on the ground, curling back up in his little ball. "Nevermind!"