Because Dead girls like me (Dreamshard!)

[Anonymous]

The golem looked back at the man sprawled on the floor as she let Thanatos drag her along. Then she smiled up at the Necromancer, "He wasn't very nice I don't think."

The mage, while normally not this stupid, had just enough drink in him to not realize he might be in over his head. He struggled to his feet, lurching after the two, "Ya shouldn't 'ave done that."

He grabbed Thanatos' should, trying to spin him around. Damayanti watched it all, her expression not really changing. It was a bit like watching a play.

She didn't really like the mage, but he hadn't really threatened her. And she wasn't sure if Thanatos wanted her help or not. So she chose  to just watch what happened. Log it away in her memory for recollection at a later time.

[Anonymous]

While Thanatos hadn't dealt that often with mages, drunks he had certainly dealt with before. Besides, mages had a tendency to neglect their physical training and this mage was no different. Letting Damayanti go and hopefully out of trouble though not out of sight, he let himself be spun around but dodged the inevitable punch easily by using the momentum of the spin to twist out of the way.

Truth be told, he was getting a little annoyed. The drunk mage was getting in the way of him being able to properly examine Damayanti. The mage was wasting his time, and he hated that. So Thanatos didn't waste any more time. Dropping low, he snapped out a quick punch that caught the mage on his jaw, before knocking out his feet from under him, letting him land with a satisfying thump on the floor and hitting his head hard enough to knock him out.

Of course, that's when his buddies decided to intervene and Thanatos quickly drew back from the fallen mage. "Listen, I don't want any more trouble. He's only got a few bruises and he'll wake up tomorrow with a bit of a headache. Please just take him and go." He spread his arms in a gesture of peace while letting them see the obviously mostly uninjured mage. Hopefully they would just find the situation amusing, pick up their friend and go back to their own business.

[Anonymous]

There was a tense moment when the friends seemed unsure what they should do. Then finally, one of them shrugged, laughed and leaned over to start trying to move the unconscious mage off the floor, "Hey, no worries. He started it. I hope your...err....lady friend is alright."

The lady friend was absently watching the innkeeper yelling at one of the barmaids to start cleaning up the mess the small fight had made. Damayanti liked to watch things, try and learn how to interact with people better. Though she didn't really like how loud the man was.

When Thanatos had finished with the mage and his friends, she turned her gaze to him, "I'm hungry."

[Anonymous]

Thanatos relaxes slightly at the answer and gives a shrug at the question/statement. With the matter settled, he can deal with Damayanti. And she was hungry. Since he met the flesh golem, he hadn't had a dull moment yet. "I sent my companions out to hunt. They'll come back with something suitable." He told her before ushering her out of the common room to their newly booked room in the inn.

It was a rather spacious room with two single beds. He didn't have much in the way of belongings, so everything in the room belonged to the inn. Still, the beds were relatively clean and they had a private washroom as well. Thanatos gestured for Damayanti to sit before taking a seat on one of the beds. "Give me a few moments." He closed his eyes and began to focus his powers, checking up on how his creatures were doing.

A few minutes passed in silence before he opened his eyes again. "Done. I have a few animals to satisfy you for now. Perhaps we can go to the market tomorrow to find a few live animals suited to your taste." As he spoke, his creatures dragged in a few rats. Given their small size, it was easier for them to overpower rats and knock them senseless. Presenting the rats to Damayanti, he made a query. "Will this do for now?"

[Anonymous]

Damayanti didn't own anything other then the clothes on her back and a few other small things. So she was used to living out of Inns or worse. She made herself comfortable, watching the Necromancer work.

When the creatures came back, she made a face at the rats. She really disliked feeding off such small prey. It was hardly satisfying. But it was better then losing control. And probably eating Thanatos.

So she picked up the unconscious rats and headed to the washroom. She stood in the doorway, looking at Thanatos, "Don't come in. You have so much Life. I don't want to eat you."

Then she shut the door. It was silent for a little while, then small, panicked squeaks could be heard through the door. A small amount of magic was building in the washroom. And like the golem, it was similar to Necromancy but not quite right. Then the rats went silent, their lives snuffed out. And there was only the sounds of eating.

After 10-15 minutes, the door opened again. Bits of blood and gore still clung to Damayanti's face, but it looked as if she had tried to wipe most of it away. The washroom was a bit of a mess, the rats had bled out on the floor. And it looked at if the golem had pulled out and messily devoured most of their internal organs.

She smiled at Thanatos, "Thank you. And we can get a bigger meal tomorrow? Rats don't last very long." She glanced down at the small, mutilated corpses, "It's better if they have more soul."

[Anonymous]

Thanatos was extremely curious as to the ritual she used to consume the Life of other creatures. But he was also smart enough to realise not to indulge in such curiosity unless he had most of the environment under his control. The washroom of an inn was hardly a suitable place. So instead he probed with his magical senses, 'watching' from the outside as the magic in the washroom slowly built up and the rats were consumed.

Seeing the bloody mess when she emerged, he directed Patches and gang to clean things up. His creatures weren't too fussy about their meals as long as there was blood and meat, and they were excellent at devouring every last morsel. Closing the door on their little feast, he turned to face Damayanti again, gently wiping away the blood and gore on her face with a clean cloth.

"No problem. This was just a quick fix. I'll secure a larger animal tomorrow. We'll probably have to go somewhere else for you to eat though. Even if we manage to keep the animal silent, the mess will be too noticeable." He told her as he finished wiping off her face. The cloth he kept to be cleaned for later, then he sat down beside her.

"Now that we have some privacy, can I see your stitching? I'll like to examine the work done on you in detail." With someone else, that would have been pervertic. Thanatos, however, simply wanted to study her and would do so with clinical detachment.

[Anonymous]

Damayanti nodded, smiling at the mention of a better meal tomorrow. The rats just took the edge off the hunger, they didn't really satisfy her, "Dogs are nice. Horses are better, but they are hard to get. Children are the best. So full of life," Her eyes closed for a moment, savoring the thought. Then her eyes opened and she looked rather sad, "But it makes me sad. When they can't get up. They can't laugh or sing or play anymore."

She keep her rather melancholy expression as Thanatos cleaned her face. At his request to see her stitching the golem nodded. She had no issue with the nudity. She didn't even know it was a taboo to most people.

She reached down and gripped the bottom of her shirt, though she hesitated a moment before lifting over her head. She was used to people being upset when they saw the stitches. And she was enjoying Thanatos' company and didn't want him to leave.

But he has asked. So the shirt went over her head and was tossed to the floor at her feet. Then the skirt soon followed. Her clothes were rather old and pieced together, mismatched and ugly. But underneath them, her underwear was soft and expensive looking, probably silk. And rather modest. A lacy camisole and knee length bloomers.

The golem stood there, nervously trying to hide as many of the stitch lines as she could with her body. She seemed to have been made of quite a few bodies. None of her limbs were a whole piece. Either just above or just below most of her joints was a line where a new part had been attached. With the bloomers on, it was impossible to tell where the legs were connected.

While she made a beautiful, angelic picture even in her grubby clothes, stripped down like that, the beauty seemed off. Her legs didn't match. Her hands were similar but when looked at closely, they weren't from the same girl.

The stitching itself was large and thick, but sturdy. And the thread that held her flesh together looked like it was a thick, rough waterproof line. More suited to a boat's sail then to a delicate girls skin.

[Anonymous]

ooc: Sigh, there's something wrong when I can't write anything without it sounding completely pervertic. I swear that Thanatos has no such thoughts at all!

bic: Thanatos took several moments to study the golem intently, walking around her in a circle and probing her gently with his magic again. She really was a fascinating construct. "There's no need to hide the stitching Damayanti," he remarked absently as he examined her, "that's kind of the point of the examination." Others might have blushed, felt shy or some other emotion on seeing the very pretty girl wearing so little. Given that Thanatos had already seen every bit of human anatomy when he was younger, such things didn't even faze him. He studied her with fascination of a scientist.

When he was done with the visual and magical inspection, he moved on to a more physical one. "Please lie down on the bed." He requested. Then he examined her stitching in greater detail. "Sturdy stitching. But really, it could have been so much better." He commented mostly to himself. He was also calculating the number of parts Damayanti had required. And a portion of his mind was wondering how the creator had even got all the parts. He wasn't so sure he really wanted to know. Finding such near perfect matches would probably have been impossible if simply left to chance.

"I could restitch you so the stitches aren't so obvious." Thanatos offered once he was done with the examination. "But you really are a fine construction. Your creator certainly had taste." No matter how it was done, he did have a grudging respect for whoever made her. It showed talent, though it also showed a willingness to go to lengths he wasn't yet prepared to reach. How did her creator even feed her? "I recommend against eating children. Or rather people in general. It invites all manner of trouble. I'll get you a big animal tomorrow, so please don't eat anyone in the meantime." As he spoke, he was taking out his stitching kit.

[Anonymous]

Damayanti wasn't really fazed by his examination. She had no real concept of sex or anything related to it and had a skewed idea of modesty.

The golem had to have been made of of quite a number of girls. Her face was just as pretty, but stripped down to her underwear, her beauty had a strange quality with all the mismatched parts. It gave one a feeling of strangeness when looking at her.

She watched him as he talked to her, her eyes never leaving his face, "I...sometimes get their memories." One hand came up to run its fingers along the stitch in her wrist, "The girls whose parts I wear. But its very confusing."

Her gaze shifted to the door to the washroom, "I don't like to eat people. I don't like when they can't get back up. I ate the rats. So I wont lose control."

[Anonymous]

"Ambient memories from the parts you're made of?" He sounded surprised. It seemed like every moment he found out something new about this golem. Taking out his needle and fibres that he used for the sole purpose of sewing flesh, he began to work on her stitches. It would also be a way to see if she reacted to the needle in her flesh with pain or barely noticed it.

"Once I understand your construction completely, I can help you with those memories. There might be a way to control when you can recall them and how. And while you're very well made, your creator didn't blend your parts together very well." He worked methodically on her body, undoing one line of stitching before he put in his own. Years of practice had given him the skill required to sew nearly invisible stitches and he worked with flesh enough to know which fibres would blend in perfectly.

"I know a little about flesh-crafting, so once I get more experience, I should be able to make you look human enough to pass yourself off better among other people. I imagine that your looks probably got you into trouble some times."

[Anonymous]

When Thanatos put the needle to her flesh, the golem winced slightly, but her expression didn't flicker. She felt it, and didn't like the sensation, but it didn't really hurt.

While the Necromancer worked, her fingers traced along a stitch in her leg. His talking about her looks made her chest a little tight. She didn't like hearing about her poor looks.

As she watched her thick stitches disappear, her expression stayed carefully blank. She had always had those stitches. That was how she had been made. But it was better to look more...human. But she was human. Wasn't she?

"Does that mean you'll be getting me new parts?" Damayanti's voice was hardly more then a whisper, her eyes fixed on her left foot, not looking at the Necromancer's face.

[Anonymous]

"Certainly not." Thanatos replied dryly as he continued working on the stitches. He was carefully studying the expression of the golem for signs of pain, but somehow he got the feeling he had said something wrong. Then it occured to him. She had shown a remarkable amount of insecurity every time he mentioned her looks. So he continued in a more reassuring manner. "You're very beautifully made and it would be criminal to get you new parts when you already have such lovely ones. But remember what I said early about good and better? Everything has room for improvement. It just so happens I know a few ways to improve you."

His creatures were done with their feast and the door to the washroom was open once more. There wasn't a trace of blood left, nor the bodies of the little rats Damayanti had eaten. If anything, his creatures were thorough. "Can you tell me more about yourself? What did your creator do with you? What did you do after your creator died?" Perhaps if she was the one talking, he wouldn't say something wrong.

[Anonymous]

The golem gave Thanatos a small smile at his praise, though she still felt nervous. That she hadn't been made right. And that was why people were still such a mystery to her. That she wasn't human.

She watched the creatures come out of the bathroom and she lowered her hand, cooing softly to them. She thought they were very cute, "I don't know why he made me. I ate him. I didn't mean too. But the first thing I remember," She paused, thinking, "Well, that I remember as me, is of eating him."

She sighed, using her free hand to brush a strand of pale red blond hair out of her face, "He didn't have enough Life for me. When he made me. So I ate the first thing I could find." She glanced away from the undead pets to the Necromancer, "I was in a white, lacy dress. With lots of layers. But people seemed to think it was weird. So I got ride of it. And found some other clothes."

[Anonymous]

That was probably the wrong question to ask. Thanatos froze mid-stitch when Damayanti spoke of her past. Sure, he had animated dead people, but he hadn't actually killed any of them himself. Unless one counted the slavers who had attacked his village, but those his creations had killed and eaten. He hadn't really done it himself.

And her creator was definitely one twisted man. Thanatos was probably glad he hadn't met the guy. If one mage with necromatic powers was like that, he wondered what those in Necromantia was like. It was part of the reason for his hesitation really. Did he really want to become like them?

Shaking his head, he continued his stitching. The pause had probably only been a fraction of a second, but so many thoughts had passed through his mind. "Perhaps if we can find a way to feed you all the Life you need, you won't have to keep eating other creatures for it." He mused out loud. "Anyway, I'm done. Hope you like my work." His little creatures were standing by the side of the bed like silent spectators, waiting for any further commands from Thanatos.

[Anonymous]

Damayanti stood up, turning in place as she tried to see all the work, "Is there a mirror?" She wanted to see it all. It was much prettier then the other stitching had been.

She hadn't noticed his brief moment of discomfort, to excited by her new work. The sadness from earlier was gone, replaced by a simple joy, "It's so delicate. I almost can't see it."

The golem moved her limbs, getting used to the new feel of them, "Will it still be as strong?" She couldn't take her eyes off the new work, "Does this mean I'm human now? Because you made me better?"

[Anonymous]

"Yeah, here." He handed her a mirror from his belongings. Mirrors were always useful for quite a variety of things that had nothing to do with one's physical looks, but sometimes one could use it for their basic function too. "And don't worry about its strength. I use these fibres for all my creatures, and I put a bit of my magic into the stitching. They won't fall apart that easily."

Her hopeful question made him shake his head though. Such a child. "You're not human though I can make you look more human given time. But you shouldn't feel sad about that. There are a lot of people on Earth who aren't human either. You're Damayanti. And you're a beautiful construct given true life and sentience. Isn't that enough?" He wondered if she could understand how incredible she was. A completely artificial creation with Life! If only he could show her what he meant.

[Anonymous]

Damayanti had happily taken the mirror and had been eagerly examining herself in it while Thanatos answered her question. As he spoke, the girls joy began to fade until it had utterly vanished.

She set the mirror down on the bed, no longer excited by the threads. She couldn't be human? No one had ever told her she could. But she had always hoped.

"But..." She had to pause for a moment, her voice cracking, "But why can't I be human? I...I watch everyone. So I can act like them. And...and....if I can look human...shouldn't I be human?"

Tears had started to fall unchecked down her face. Her perfectly pale skin was starting to turn red and blotchy from the tears, "I was...I was made to be human. So...if...if you make me better I get to be human....right?"

[Anonymous]

"What do you mean by human Damayanti?" Thanatos asked. "Do you mean looking like them? Do you mean acting like them? You're made from human parts. It doesn't mean you're human. Just like it doesn't mean I'm a faerie if I grafted fae wings onto my back. We're born or created the way we are. And it's nothing to be sad about."

He lifted her face gently and wiped away those tears. "We are who we are. Perhaps you are different from what your creator expected you to be, but that shouldn't matter. You're still Damayanti. You shouldn't feel sad just because you aren't human."

[Anonymous]

"But I want to be like them." She struggled for the words, not sure how to express what she felt, "I want to....I want to have a place."

She sniffled and lifted her arm to wipe the snot that was threatening to drip down her face onto the back of her hand, "You don't understand. You are human." She looked at the hand she had just wiped her face with, at the new stitches on it, "I don't fit anywhere. I don't belong."

[Anonymous]

Thanatos laughed but the laugh was a hollow one. "You think being human means you have a place? It means you fit in? It means you belong? You think all the times you were mocked, you were teased, you were feared, you were attacked was because you weren't human? You'll be wrong. All those things happened because you were different. You not being human is just icing on the cake."

His tone wasn't exactly bitter but was extremely sad. "My power makes everyone fear me and hate me. I've seen the look of disgust and loathing when they see me, where people I grew up with turned away for fear of coming close to me. I've been run out of town with stones and worse thrown at me. I've had to flee when my secret was known and armed troops were sent to bring me in for whatever unsolved crime they happened to have. I've been called every possible name in the book just because my powers are of a different vein than the usual one. Don't say I don't understand what it means to not belong. I know."

The silence hung in the air for several moments. While Thanatos could understand why it happened, it didn't stop him from feeling bitter that it did. Necromantia was an option, but it just seemed to swing too far the other way. Why couldn't he practice his art in peace?

But perhaps he had been a little too harsh on Damayanti.

"I'm sorry Damayanti. But I'm not going to lie to you to make you feel better either. You'll never be a normal human. I'm never going to fit into the society at large. Until we accept that, we can't move on. We can find ways and means to blend in better. We may even find people who are willing to accept us for who we are. But there are many out there who will never understand, or want to understand. And we must always remember that."