F**k You and the Horse You Rode Up On!

[Volker]

"Mmhm." Joseph said disbelievingly. He didn't think for a moment he was attractive in his natural form. So many people seemed so eager for him to change for them. He couldn't actually remember the last time someone had hit on him without Joseph changing at least a little bit to suit them. It was always...something. Well, whatever. If this rabbit wanted to puff him up that wasn't any of his business. He really hoped the other would ask for something else. Another haevar, or something. Joseph made an attractive rabbit if he did say so.

"Lital. Merchants always make for good pickings. Their wives don't fuck them nearly enough and they always have stashes of coin hidden away. Good thinking. Mind steering us in that direction? Since you know where it is and all. You don't have to participate. All I'm asking is that you protect me, not those other poor bastards." Joseph said. "Besides I only steal from the nasty fuckers. The ones who ask that I transform into their daughter or something, or want to hurt an animal for a few hours."

[SanctifiedSavage]

Natias quirked a brow at Joseph's description of merchants. The haevar obviously didn't see them quite the same way, but he didn't particularly mind either. Live and let live, as they say. He wasn't about to tell someone else how to do what they do or figure out how to make a living. He'd certainly escorted all manner of people across the continent before so...

All he had to say, with a small smile was, "Try not to get us in too much trouble. I'm good with a sword and a great shot, but I'm still only one man." At that, he brushed a hand along Joseph's side before excusing himself. "I'll get us turned in the right direction and steer us through until evening. We'll park somewhere once the sun starts to set. It's a bit harder to tell where we're going, and if we're on track, at night." Before he could bounce out of the wagon, he glanced over his shoulder. "If that works for you." It didn't occur to Natias that Joseph would want company along for the ride – it was his wagon, after all.

[Volker]

Joseph knew his descriptions of merchants would quirk an eyebrow. It always did. But having a shapeshifter around seemed to bring out the darkest in people. A merchant might pick a prostitute that looked something similiar to a niece or the like...but the idea of having her without having her with Joseph were the type of dark thoughts he encouraged. Joseph didn't just offer sex. It was sex without shame. Fuck your brother, a goat, your dream man or a nightmare from the beyond, all without actually doing so. It was why he charged so damn much, depending on what someone wanted.

He got up and nodded to Natias. "Just grab the reins up front and steer her where you want her to go." he directed. "I'll sit next to you so you don't do something insane and get her caught up in her own traces or something...and if you want to sleep in a bed tonight, you're welcome to mine. You've got to take your payment sometime, right?" Honestly, Joseph liked company even if he was hostile.

[SanctifiedSavage]

Natias chuckled a little at the instruction, but mostly at the offer at the end. He was still getting a feel for Joseph. The shapeshifter had an extremely jaded view of the world that the haevar found both curious and oddly endearing. Not because he agreed with it, but because it was so different from his own. It wasn't like Natias thought the world was full of great people and there weren't darknesses in their hearts. Obviously Joseph had been exposed to some crazy shit, which honestly, just made Natias all the more curious... and determined not to contribute to it.

The haevar nodded a little, pressing his ears flat as he bounced out of the wagon and moved to the front of it. He didn't take the driver's seat though and simply moved to where the horse was leading. It took him a moment to orientate himself, based on where the sun was and the direction they were presently facing, before he got her steered in the right direction. He walked with her for a little, stretching his legs and enjoying the feel of the dirt beneath his feet and claws.

It wasn't home, but it was still nice.

Evening would fall soon and, with not much beyond grasslands and rolling hills around, he'd need to do a quick circuit just to make sure the bandits hadn't thought to come back in the night and bother them. That could wait though. When both the wagon and his own horse hit a steady rhythm, he finally climbed up into the seat to relax. He could've rode Tial, but it had seemed rude when it felt like Joseph was making an... effort?.. to be nice. Besides, it was easier to talk to him when they were close.

"It's been almost three weeks since I've actually slept in a bed," he idly remarked as he settled in the seat, glancing at Joseph. "Traveling around with one is quite a luxury. Where'd you end up getting... all of this?" He gestured vaguely to the wagon behind him.

[Volker]

Joseph was happy to busy himself while Natias was guiding them. The sun was setting, and Joseph lit a candle to read a little bit of a book by. With night came shadows, long and lean and stretching over the grasslands. Joseph soon gave up the effort to read, tucking the book under the seat cushion and extinguishing the candle. He looked over at the haevar when he asked about the wagon. Joseph smirked and looked down. "Not the best story but I suppose I could tell it." he said, settling back against the seat. "I was thirteen. Still discovering my powers. Promised a little too much to a travelling merchant and he tried to take a little too much. He had ideas to make me some sort of child bride. You can't get bored when you're a twisted fuck and you enslave a kid who can technically refuse to age. I killed him, made it look like he tangled with wild dogs. The rest is history. Gave me a line of work and a place to work it in. I prefer not to shit where I eat if at all possible; bed's clean." he smirked at Natias.

"Also acquainted me with a few friends I liberated from his stovepipe." Joseph smirked and stood up in the driver's seat, grabbing ahold of one of the painted railings that supported the awning of the handsome little wagon. "Ari! Oav!" he called.

What came running alongside the wagon was odd. Two small blackened figures, holding hands like children. They looked like children, but then again they didn't. Their skin was black as pitch, though their skulls had a strange cracked quality to them, out of which soft blue light emitted. The same light shone in pinpricks out of their eye sockets, and gave them obscenely wide smiles decorated with light. They looked at Natias, giving raspy little giggles and going to bother the war horse.

"Just spirits. Fucking rude spirits." Joseph called pointedly at the pair attempting to mount the warhorse, snickering. They sounded like jackals, if jackals were submerged underwater and down a marble hallway.

[SanctifiedSavage]

Tial was having none of whatever they were and moved away from them. The war horse might be a steady animal, but spirits and unnatural things were still unsettling to most animals. It wasn't so much that he was spooked, just that he didn't want them near and he was aggressive and assertive in making that very clear.

Natias tilted his head a little as Joseph explained the origins of the wagon, then made an unhappy sound when the two went to pester his horse. "Call them off, would ya? I would prefer not to lose my horse to the grasslands." It was said with some amusement as he looked at the interesting little things. The day was just getting weirder and weirder.

Eventually, whether they went away or not, Natias was going to stop them for the night. Without the sun to see or guide by, he wasn't going to have them wandering around in the dark. He also had an obligation to his horse to take off the barding, brush him down, and give him some oats for the trouble of the day.

The least he could do.

When it was all said and done, he returned to the wagon. Off handed, he remarked, "You don't seem to attract the nicest of people in the world, do you?" He didn't mean it flippant but it really did seem that Joseph just... ran into some of the worst that society had to offer.

[Volker]

"Get the fuck away from the damn horse! It's not half as funny as you two will look when I shove one head up another's asshole!" Joseph shouted at the spirits. They giggled, but let Tial alone. With a few fits and starts, puffs of brightened fog, they vanished. It was like watching a dying engine sputter out, until the pair were gone. "They're still here. Just probaby on the roof." Joseph muttered. He watched Natias stop the wagon and tended to his own mare. He staked her out, letting her graze on grasses as much as she wanted. He seemed to care more about the tack; he oiled it. Without the tack he was dead in the water. The horse, he theorized, could take care of herself and they seemed content to ignore one another.

Joseph looked up when Natias came back to him. "You including yourself in that estimation?" he asked. "Shit happens. You can let it flatten you or you can let it roll down your back. I don't let anyone fucking control how I feel." He set aside the tack and moved to take off his brace. It needed oiling as well to keep the padding intact and the metal in good condition. "I've got some dinner, if you want it." He offered when he finished and replaced it on his leg.

He'd made bread, fried in butter and topped with chopped vegetables and sausage. There were large chunks of onion and tomato, sprinkled heavily with parsley and smashed garlic, topped with a generous amount of roasted sausage. Joseph offered Natias the plate, and settled down with his own. He ate like a heathen, horking down his meal without anything but the idea of getting it down his gullet as quickly as possible.

[SanctifiedSavage]

Tial lingered close but seemed largely at peace now. Idly eating but occasionally looking around in the dark, listening as well. Alert, but only in waves.

Natias snorted a laugh when Joseph asked if he included himself. Touche. He obviously didn't, because Natias thought quite highly of himself, but it felt stupid to say that out loud. So he didn't. Instead, he settled on swath of grass and accepted the food graciously. He had his own rations and things he'd foraged along the way, but he wasn't going to turn down anything that had been made for him. While he wasn't the biggest fan of meat, he didn't complain and ate it without a word.

The rest of it was great.

Occasionally one of his ears would twist to a sound, but they remained largely upright and forward. Listening to the only other person around him. "I hadn't meant it as an insult, more as an observation. Not often I come across someone who has... had so many experiences and is so open about all of it."

Natias leaned back on one of his hands to peer up at the sky, scattered with stars and clouds. "Not that I suppose you have a reason not to be," he remarked. It was just refreshing to talk to someone that just... laid it all out there. Joseph definitely wasn't going to be lying to him about anything. He'd already upfront admitted he was an assassin and thief. Most would play that close to the chest, at least.

But no. Natias suspected there wasn't much that Joseph did play close, and what he did... Well, the haevar couldn't begin to even imagine what that would be.

[Volker]

"You tell the truth and most people don't believe you. After all what moron would just put that out there? I tell people what I am, and who I am, and they can take it or leave it. Besides even with most people on their guard...I can still steal them blind." Joseph smirked. "Don't get nervous. You're in my employ. But to people I hate...I like making them lay awake at night thinking every mouse and every moth might be me waiting to put a knife in their spines."

He licked his fingers and took Natias' plate, going in to rub them off with a cloth. He'd wash them properly when they reached a water source, but wiping everything off but the grease kept rotten food from piling up on the plates. It wasn't the cleanest solution but it kept him from getting sick. "Being open about it gets me clientele. I've got a hundred names in a dozen cities. People fucking flock to mystery like that." Joseph pointed out as he came back out with a bottle of liquor and sat down next to Natias. "Why the fuck are we sitting on the ground when I've got a perfectly good bed?"

He poured a ceramic mug half-full of whiskey and offered it to Natias, preferring to drink from the bottle himself.

[SanctifiedSavage]

Natias watched Joseph when he answered. Not because he thought the shapeshifter might lie. That certainly wasn't going to be the case. Mostly because he was idly fascinated with someone that was so very crass and abrasive and perfectly content with their lot in life.

He'd certainly never met anyone like Joseph and he highly suspected he wouldn't in awhile. Granted, it wasn't every day one stumbled onto a shapeshifter.

The haevar thanked Joseph when he took the plate and shifted to leaning back on two hands. His ears drooped back some and he relaxed. The breeze, the chirp of insects in the warmth and the occasional play of night birds. This was the reason Natias couldn't really stay in a town for very long. He got restless and liked being outside.

Came from being raised in an open island environment, he supposed.

His ears perked back up when Joseph returned and he quirked a brow at the drink but didn't refuse it. "I like being outside. On the ground." As if to emphasize, he flexed his clawed feet while stretching out his legs. "You don't?' With a small, playful smile Natias took a sip. He didn't want to get too light in the head or impaired. If he was supposed to be some sort of escort or guard, it'd be poor form to be a drunk one. Idly, he asked, "What's been your favorite thing to turn into? Besides your base form, I suppose."

[Volker]

"Fuck no." Joseph snorted and stretched out his leg. "It makes my fucking leg hurt. I can't sit like this. There's a reason I pilfer pillows from fucking everyone." He smirked to show Natias he wasn't that put out. "Show me how you rabbits fuck tonight and Ill forgive you. As for the form...I make one hell of a cat." Joseph settled the bottle down and stood up. He did so in an odd, lurching way like he was planning to fall onto his hands. Instead, he changed. His limbs lengthened and coated with black fur. His head distorted into a much more elegant, feline shape and a long tail sprouted. True to form, the foot that he delicately picked out of the very-human-sized brace was twisted. However, he seemed to get along just fine on three.

Joseph curled his tail up and flicked his ears, giving Natias a look. It was full of self-confidence and arrogance. He knew he was beautiful in this form. The panther suited him like a glove. He butted his head against Natias, flicking his tail. He settled onto the ground, luminous yellow eyes half-lidded in pleasure. He got up and shifted back, smirking as he held onto Natias' shoulder and stood crane-legged without his brace.

"Or I've had a lot of people ask for.." he shifted again. This time into a large, black german shepherd. The form seemed to suit him as well, though there was more pressure on his foot than with the cat. He stepped ever so awkwardly with it, preferring to slowly amble.

[SanctifiedSavage]

Natias actually laughed when Joseph responded with the swearing about the ground. Right. The leg. He'd actually forgotten, as stupid as that was. "Right, right. Sort of makes me an ass." He didn't move, even sipping some of his drink, while he let Joseph show him.

A cat, though? Watching the actual shift was disturbing as fuck. Seeing someone meld into something else was... Well. That was weird. Once he was actually a cat, though, Joseph was correct. He made for a beautiful, sleek black cat.  Natias sat more upright so he could run his hand along the smooth fur. It should've felt odd, stroking someone in such a way, but it... well, Joseph looked like a damn cat.

Until he didn't.

The transition made Natias crinkle his nose and smile just a little.

The large dog was equally as authentic, and lovely, as the cat. Natias resisted petting him this time before chuckling. "You make for a good animal. There's probably a reason for that." At that, Natias did stand up but he didn't move away. In case Joseph wanted to use him to stand for a moment again. Though he did feel the need to add, "What makes you think I fuck differently than other people?" At that, he did grin. "Of the two of us, I think you're the winner in the 'weird sex' category."

[Volker]

Joseph shifted again. This time back into a haevar. It was...significantly more refined this time. He'd gotten to study Natias and when he transformed, it was beautiful. Joseph's ears were long and bell shaped, tucked neatly against his back. His slender form already lent itself well to the rabbit, and he leaned on Natias for support. He looked at him with large, brown eyes and smirked. "Oh really? Want to back up your claims?" he said playfully, tapping Natias' nose with a clawed finger. He picked up his brace from the ground and gestured to his wagon. "Come on. I can't get this thing on like this." he snickered. "Cute though...I like the ears and what it does for my legs."

Joseph flicked his ears up,  tilting them back and forth before letting them fall behind his back again. He leaned in and kissed Natias' cheek. "Come on. I can't think of you sleeping on the ground." he purred.

[SanctifiedSavage]

Natias still couldn't get over how odd it was to watch him change. He was expecting Joseph to shift back into, well, what he looked like every day, but he didn't. There was a small part of Natias' chest that constricted seeing something so familiar but not. He knew that Joseph wasn't one of his own but it was still... Natias might be a wanderer, but he hadn't left because he'd hated it there. The island had always felt too small when he knew the world was so big.

He made a face at Joseph and reflexively, but gently, ran a hand down one ear. "You're cheating," he murmured.

While Natias didn't mind the ground at all, he wouldn't begrudge a bed either. He wasn't much of a wagon driver and while the idea of having one around for some brief luxury sounded good, Natias also knew that taking care of one would eventually drive him mad.

That and Tial would be wasted pulling one. The war horse would likely rebel.

He walked Joseph the couple of steps back to the wagon and helped him up into it, following him in. It should've felt odd, sleeping with someone after having met them that day, but it didn't. Joseph was quick to lay out exactly who he was and apologize for none of it and Natias wasn't the sort to worry about such things. If they were going to fight, it would've happened already, and he hadn't done anything in his life that someone would have sent Joseph to kill him over.

At least, not that he could think of. And this would be an odd way of murdering him. Or a fun way. Whatever.

[Volker]

Joseph took advantage of the support to put his brace back on when he got inside of the wagon. There were clever little handholds here and there, clearly added after he'd obtained the wagon, that allowed him a firm grip while he replaced the brace on his foot. He flopped unceremoniously on the bed, grunting in irritation when he laid on his ears and had to take a few seconds to get them out from underneath him. He wasn't sticking to Natias' stipulation that he had to be himself...he was hoping the other wouldn't call him on it. Being what he was allowed him to escape a very deep hole of self-hatred. He didn't think he'd ever fucked or made love in his original form. It was always some change.

He pulled his shirt over his head (minding the ears), and slid his pants down over his hips. His underclothes were clearly made for women; they were nice, black lacy things that revealed all too damn much and yet not enough. He stretched out on his bed, looking at Natias and flicking his ears up. Welcoming him over.

[SanctifiedSavage]

Natias didn't immediately enter the wagon, allowing Joseph some space to get settled while he idly watched. It was damned enticing to have him keep the ears. To remain as he was, but it'd nag at Natias if he didn't say something. Especially when that'd been one of his things.

There had to be a reason for it and part of the haevar wondered if Joseph was testing him. Waiting to see if Natias would say something or if he'd fall into line like everyone else. So, he lingered in the doorway of the wagon and smiled a little. "As lovely and enticing as that is," which he definitely meant, he said, "Not exactly what we agreed to, is it?" The haevar was a rather relaxed individual, but he definitely did not want to fall into any category close to what Joseph thought of other people.

So he remained where he was and waited. Like a good boy.

[Volker]

Joseph didn't have any reservations about removing his clothing. It was part of the job. It wasn't a protective layer like his transformations were. He sat up a bit and frowned when Natias called him on it. He had agreed to be in his original form but...he was starting to regret agreeing to that. He had thought convincingly imitating another of the haevar's kind would have gotten him a pass. He ran his fingers through his hair and sighed, changing back. He didn't regret losing the ears; they were damned inconvenient in such a confined space. What he did keep was....little things. He smoothed out his features a bit, made himself slightly less...bony. Tamped down how high his cheekbones were and made his lips a little fuller. Natias almost had him as he was born but...Joseph was representing himself as a more idealized image of what he looked like normally.

He had to keep some of his protective armor on, after all, couldn't he? He hoped that it would pass. He tried to look a little more confident than he was. "Better?" he asked. Part of his wondered if Natias would call him out on this too. It wasn't what they agreed upon. Close...but not there yet.

[SanctifiedSavage]

It was an interesting phenomenon, really. Watching a shapeshifter be so reluctant to take on their own form when he'd so carelessly offered sex as payment. Natias felt like that should mean something, that there was definitely a depth there, but he just couldn't see it. Wasn't smart enough to grasp what it really meant.

As much as his chest tightened to see someone like him, it still bothered him on a different level, in an inexplainable way, that he wouldn't go back on what he'd asked for originally. That was important, and it seemed more so now. He just didn't know why.

Natias watched him a long moment, ears lowered some because of the wagon and because he was focused. He looked like before, but not? Similar but different. Natias didn't know Joseph well enough to say otherwise and they'd not been around one another long enough for him to point out what it might be. So, instead, Natias settled more so in the doorway and said, "I already told you, you don't have to do anything you don't want. I really don't mind sleeping outside. I've been doing it for a week before I met you." His tone was casual, easy, like they were talking about the sky or the weather and Joseph was fully dressed.

Natias might enjoy sex – there were a lot of people who did – but there was no way he was about to get in bed with someone who was reluctant about... well, any of it.

[Volker]

The casual tone seemed to irk Joseph even more. He sat up, shedding the last of his glamours. He was sitting in front of Natias exactly the way he'd been born, scars and all. He folded his arms over his chest and rubbed his arm. Now it was a point of pride. He had been wearing his transformations like armor. Now Natias had him truly naked. He lifted his chin up. It was a war against his own poor self-confidence and his pride in keeping up his half of the deal. "I'm fine." he said venomously. He hated that Natias had seen through it. He slid under the covers and looked at the rabbit. He nodded to the bed, trying to regain some of his former confidence. He looked...nervous. Not unwilling, but nervous.

[SanctifiedSavage]

Natias frowned a little when Joseph sat up and said something that, when said, generally meant the opposite. I'm fine almost certainly meant, when said in such a way, that it was not fine. At this point, the haevar knew when he was out of his depth and far out classed when it came to both a mental and emotional confrontation. He had no idea what was going on with Joseph, but he understood that what he'd asked was difficult.

Maybe too difficult.

He considered that while he watched Joseph and actually shook his head. "Ah. Not tonight, hm? I'm not in the mood." He said it with a smile, meant to smooth over whatever tension or anger might be directed his way. Before Joseph could argue the point, though, Natias turned and bounced out of the doorway. Whatever was going on, he felt like taking a step back was... probably what was best.

He certainly didn't know Joseph well enough to get involved in a mess right off the bat and he was trying, very hard, to be a good person. Because, at base, he was. Natias didn't want anyone uncomfortable around him, especially because of something he might do. The payment had been Joseph's idea to begin with and there was no reason for Natias to collect now. Instead, he made his way toward Tial, if only for something to do.