It was a beautiful day to die.
Katxiel had ensured it would be. She could feel storms approaching in the distance, but she reached out to them and asked them to wait, just a little longer. She loved the rain, but she wanted to see one last sunset. It could rain all it wanted after that.
The weather was lovely and not too muggy, and she had gotten to enjoy all her favorites. She got to eat her favorite foods, as much as she wanted, until she could hardly move. She got to spend time with her friends, saying her goodbyes and trying not to cry even when they failed. She got to take the longest bath of her life using the most expensive soaps and oils, her handmaidens scrubbing her down until her skin was silky soft. They helped her dress in finery, replacing her jewellery made of semiprecious stones with jewellery shining with gold and gems, and brushed her hair until it shone.
And then it was time to go. Time for the final purification rituals at the temple. Copal was burned and prayers were recited, and the marks of the goddess were painted onto her bare arms and face with white clay. By the time she was properly prepared and all rites given, it was just shy of sundown.
Her friends and loved ones were there to see her off, but they could not go where she was going. She hugged them one last time, and felt her heart squeeze when she saw her best friend, Rana, was not there.
Rana couldn't bear it. She had avoided Katxiel more and more over the last week, so Katxiel couldn't say she was surprised...
But it still hurt.
She bit her lip, looking out at the familiar faces of all the people she had spent her full twenty-one years among--the priests and priestesses who were like her family, her friends who loved her even if they sometimes babied her, and the villagers who ranged from familiar to stranger. Here and there she studied a face that looked a little like her own, wondering if the one who birthed her was out there watching, too. But then the High Priestess laid a gentle hand on her arm and said, "It's time."
And so Katxiel took a deep breath and went with her the other temple-keepers, prepared to step from this world into the next.
"Is this really necessary?" Katxiel said as she took a seat on the altar.
They had walked a fair distance into the jungle, on a path she was very familiar with. Katxiel had walked it many times in the last week, preparing herself for her final journey so she could gaze upon her resting place. If she rehearsed it a few times, it would be easier when she had to do it for real, right? At least that had been the idea. Everything looked the same now as it did those last few trips: the stone altar was there, the clearing's centerpiece, as sturdy and imposing as it had ever been. But this time it looked different. This time chains were laced through slots in the stone, with a shackle at each corner. Huh...guess she should have been a little more curious about what those slots were for.
She hugged her knees to her chest, frowning at the chains, trying hard to keep her nerves at bay. "I've prepared for this all my life. I've dreamed of this day since my birth. Would you insult me so? You can't honestly believe I'd..."
And then she trailed off, because the unyielding expressions of her guides gave her all the answers she needed. Really. They really believed she would come this far only to fight it? Fight against her entire purpose?
"Human instincts are strong, Ixtacotl," the high priestess said gently, calling her by the goddess's name rather than the vessel's. She reached and tucked a strand of Katxiel's hair behind her ear with an affectionate smile, and Katxiel leaned into the caress, taking comfort from the gesture. "You are our goddess, but you are yet imprisoned by the flesh. No matter how strong the mind, the body often acts without thinking, just as you breathe without thinking. Even if the mind is unafraid, sometimes the body is still fearful. This is here for you, to give you strength even when your body fails you."
Oh...well. She supposed that made sense. "Okay," she said slowly. "I understand, I think." But she still didn't like it.
Seeming pleased with her acceptance, the priestess held a small waterskin out to her. "Drink. It's to help you through your transition."
Obediently, Katxiel took a sip--and nearly spit it back up in surprise. It was not water like she expected, but some pungent, earthy concoction that made her want to gag. But she refused to be so weak, refused to make such an unsightly scene, and swallowed down as much as she could tolerate as quickly as she could in one held breath. When she finally came up for air, she pushed the waterskin back toward the priestess. "Oof, that's strong."
"It's only tea. You remember the kind. It will help you not feel. Now just relax and breathe. That's all you have to do now. You remember your prayers, correct? Pray with me, now."
The priestess helped her lay back onto the stone, and Katxiel couldn't help the nervous flutter in her belly when the first manacle clasped around her wrist. Her heart skipped a beat, then beat faster still, and she swallowed and closed her eyes and focused on murmuring the prayers like she was taught. She wasn't afraid, not really; she just hated feeling trapped, and that claustrophobic chest-tightening only increased with each closed shackle until she could feel herself lightly trembling. Okay, maybe she was a little afraid. But to be fair, she didn't know what was on the other side. She had no map, no guide, no idea what to expect. And she was a little afraid of the blade the priestess held and how it would feel when it cut her skin, but it was freshly sharpened and she was told she would hardly feel a thing.
She was afraid of the beast, too, but had been told not to fear it. He would consume her, just as Ixtacotl had been slain and consumed, but she wouldn't feel that, either. She would be too silly from the blood-letting and the tea that it would be just like a dream at that point, and then she would wake up among the gods.
She had been waiting for this all her life. This was her purpose. Her duty. Everything she had ever done had built up to this one moment.
She was afraid, but she was ready. It was natural to be afraid, she had been told many times before.
"Are you ready?" the High Priestess asked as though hearing her thoughts, and Katxiel said a breathless, "Yes," before she could lose her nerve.
This was an honor, the greatest one that anyone could ever hope for.
But the knife did hurt as it sliced across both wrists, bright and stinging, and her chant wavered with a soft cry and a wince. She bit her lip to stifle it, hands curling into fists, then remembered her breathing and tried to stay calm, tried to keep up the mantra as the High Priestess caressed her hair and told her to be brave. Blood ran from the wounds into channels carved into the altar, dripping down the sides and into bowls set to collect it. Oh gods. It was almost time. It was happening, and the reality of it all left her dizzy and breathless with a mix of fear and euphoria.
Maybe that was the work of blood loss and drugged tea, too...
Once the act was done, and her chant began to fade as dizziness took over, her guides left her to her fate. The blood would attract predators soon, and the ritual would be complete. No one wanted to be there when the predators came to feed.
No one except Katxiel, who had begun to drift in and out of awareness.
The cool waters of a nearby stream helped keep the striped cat comfortable in the humid jungle as he lazily paddled on downstream. Fintan had only woken up from a lazy afternoon nap a short time ago and was still in the process of getting over his lethargy. It would not be long though before he was heeding the call of his stomach and searching for food.
As he dragged himself up onto the bank, he made a mental note to walk the perimeter of his territory in the near future. It had been a while and the last thing the male needed was a trespasser thinking they could get away with freeloading on his lands.
Without direction, Fintan wandered aimlessly, enjoying the peaceful night. Suddenly, a primate darted from cover, catching his eye and in a shot the tiger was hot on its heels. It bounded high above in the canopy, hooting and hollering in fear as it tore ahead, Fintan leaping easily in stride on the ground below, waiting for the creature to fall.
When it did not seem to be close to doing so, the tiger decided to help things along. In the blink of an eye, Fintan's powerful legs propelled him up through the air like an arrow as he launched himself into a tree, leaping up several branches on the way until he came to a sudden stop as an all too familiar scent flooded his nose.
Blood.
And a lot of it at that. His whiskers twitched as he bared his teeth in a warning snarl. It seemed he had been too remiss in his duties after all. Had he acted sooner there would not be some human chained and bleeding on the stone slab again. Meal long forgotten, the tiger hissed, his tail snapping angrily from side to side in agitation as he surveyed the jungle below for any signs that the others were still lingering about.
Quiet jungle sounds were all that met his pricked ears, but still he was cautious as he descended back down the tree, head swiveling and belly low. The scent of warm metal grew more acrid the closer he got but still he took his time to assess for traps and ambushes. This was not the first human abandoned like an inviting and free dinner bell to any carnivore in the area. At least this one was still alive....hopefully.
Several tense minutes passed in still, relative silence before the tiger shifter pounced delicately up onto the altar on near silent paws. Fintan sniffed at the blood upon her wrists, his rough tongue flicking out for a taste. Still hot and flowing albeit slower than it perhaps should have been. He moved up her body then, dipping his head low into her face even his breath held within his chest as stood still listening hoping for the thud of her heart or a whoosh of her lungs, perhaps a puff of breath upon his own face.
And there it was.
Fintan wasted no time hopping off the stone bed and grappled with the old, rusty chain. With the foul-tasting metal in his mouth he began to back up, tugging with all his might in hopes of snapping it. The tiger finally felt it pull taut and his paws dug into the soft earth as he fought with it, yanking this way and that until an explosive crack resounded through the jungle. He immediately dropped the chain in favor of leaping back towards the girl, shifting in the process so that by the time he reached her side he was fully bare and human.
He scooped her up in strong arms, uncaring how the four chains now severed from the central one still dangled from her limbs or how blood trickled down from her body to his. Her life depended on his haste. They needed to get back to the river. He needed to stop the bleeding, before she ended up as another nameless corpse pointlessly abandoned to rot.
In and out Kaxtiel drifted, between darkness and brief blinks and flashes of brilliant light and color. To her, the light was her gods. In reality, it was her eyes flickering open between bouts of unconsciousness.
In that moment as she slowly died, she had no concept of time, or really much of anything at all. She felt only the euphoria of the drug, and the euphoria of her body's last desperate push to keep her body functioning. Some people might see things as they died, memories, family, friends, but the tea dampened that so that she felt only peace.
Or at least she did for what felt like a long, long while.
But then something was happening. Jostling, movement, flashes of pain. For a brief, hazy moment she could swear she saw a tiger's face looming so close to hers, and she knew it was time, she knew her god had come, but then her eyes rolled back and she was out again, and there was nothing for a time.
Another blink and blurry color swam into focus. The world was moving dizzily, her body limp and lolling. She felt weak, like weights were fastened to even her eyelids, but she had time enough to catch a glance of a beautiful man with hair like fire, and the awareness to realize he was carrying her.
A god?
So it was done?
"Thank..." she started to say, but even words were too heavy for her tongue to lift, and the darkness swarmed her again.
She felt so light and weak in his arms. The way she bounced with every racing like a helpless cub was both deeply concerning and immensely helpful. While it certainly made getting to the river easier, he was not so sure that he did not prefer her struggle. At least it would mean that the hot blood pooling down his legs in slowing trickles was merely a minor flesh-wound.
They crashed into the water with a massive splash, sending birds and small fish scurrying in surprise. Still clutching her close, he fell to his knees, the water reaching his waist as trails of red washed away from them both. With one hand he scooped handfuls of mud up from the river-bottom and caked it onto her arms while the other fought to keep her head above water.
Golden eyes flicked to her face as she attempted to speak but in a heartbeat she was out again. A brow flickered up as he rolled his eyes and continued with his attempts to stem the bloodflow. The snap of a tree branch gave him pause, eyes dilating and head at attention, straining to hear and catch further sounds.
The jungle was far too quiet.
No time to waste. Fintan surged up out of the water and waded to the other side. Once again he cursed the fact she was unconscious. He would be far faster in his preferred form but with no way to cling to him it would be next to impossible to keep her on his broad back without having to just drag her across the forest floor. The thought was tempting though.
On bipedal foot however he whisked her away as quietly and quickly as possible, checking constantly that they were not followed all the way back to his den. The crevice in the rock face was a tight squeeze and required some delicate maneuvering to get them both through together. The fact he may have bumped her head a couple times in the process was irrelevant. It was not as if she was awake after all.
Now though he had a new task set before him. He needed to get the little human girl warm. If the bloodloss hadn't doomed her already, shock and cold would be quick to follow. Fintan placed her on some warm pelts from previous kills before making quick, unhesitant work of tearing her clothes from her. The wet fabric submitted easily in the wake of his strong grip. The rags were cast aside like trash without care. Finally, only once he had ensured once more they had not been followed by human, shifter, or beast alike did he trot back deeper into his den, shifting into his true massive tiger form and crawl up her body to lay partially own and most curled around her body. His heavy chin rested on her sternum, one massive paw wrapped over her middle, dragging her closer as he started to doze. At least if the girl died in her sleep it would be painless and he'd have a free meal out of it once he woke.
She was so warm.
The first thing Katxiel was aware of was the warmth, bright and comfortable and seeping into her cold limbs. It felt good--safe and comforting, soft furs beneath and atop her. She didn't want to wake up; she wanted to fall back into that dark, quiet place where it was so warm and serene and free of fear--or anything else at all. But the throbbing at her wrists kept her from dozing, pulsing to the beat of her heart in a way she couldn't ignore.
Wait. Pain...?
Pulse?
That didn't seem...right?
Then came the heaviness--not just in her limbs, but on her, a weight on her belly and chest that came from outside rather than within her. There was a sound, too--the sound of breathing, deeper and louder than her own. Her sleepy, still slightly drugged brain puzzled at that, all these strange details that just seemed...off. It disturbed her from her rest enough that, after some time, she managed to force her eyes open a crack even as they burned with exhaustion.
Her vision blurred at first, like she was looking up through water, and then slowly swam into focus.
And a massive jolt went through her, like an electric shock, her heart leaping into her throat and her breath catching in her throat with a soft squeak. For the first thing she saw was a massive tiger's head, resting atop her chest, its eyes closed.
Katxiel went very still, but her heart was pounding against her chest so quickly it hurt, her throat tight with fear. This wasn't the golden paradise she had been expecting, but a dark cave with a massive beast, and from the ache in her wrists and the swimming in her vision, she was still very much alive.
She bit her lip, holding back the urge to scream. It had been one thing to go to the altar and doze off; it was quite another to wake up beneath the massive creature that was supposed to send her off. Why hadn't it killed her? It was supposed to have eaten her! She wasn't supposed to still be here! Worse, now that she was awake and fully conscious, she was afraid. Of course it was an honor. Of course it needed to happen. But knowledge and basic human instinct were two very different (and competing, in this case) things!
Was it...was it saving her for later?
Katxiel could feel herself trembling in a way that had little to do with blood loss. It had to kill her. She had to be brave. How could she fail such a simple task as dying?! Oh gods, she had wanted to die asleep and unaware, and she had seen before that animals sometimes ate their prey before they were actually dead. Would it eat her alive or kill her cleanly first? Oh gods, oh gods, no, breathe, she could do this. Pain was temporary, right?
Hands shaking, she reached up to slowly poke at the beast, though her arms felt heavy and wobbly. "M...mister...mister tiger, sir...?" she managed to get out, voice a hoarse croak. "Can you, um...maybe...uh, wake up...? Please."
He was first awoken by the endlessly thundering beneath his jaw. Fintan's ear twitched to hear how her heartbeat pounded but otherwise remained still with his eyes closed. There was little she could do to injure him. Perhaps she would fall back into unconsciousness as she had done so many times before.
The incessant prodding to his side made him sigh deeply, ears flicking in irritation as he finally blink his eyes open lazily. Fintan dragged himself to his paws slowly, giving a mighty yawn over her chest and a big kitty stretch before sitting down beside her, tail tucked in around his paws as he looked down at her tiredly, still blinking slowly.
Well...she was alive. That was something, he supposed. At least she was polite, for a human.
It woke up, as she wished, and Katxiel stared up at the tiger in awe and more than a little fear when its jaws opened wide and bared those long white fangs. With a shaky breath, she clenched her eyes shut and turned her face away, thinking this was it, waiting to feel those teeth sink into her and praying to be strong--but all she felt was a sudden lack of pressure and a cool rush of air when the beast moved off of her, instead.
...Wha...what...?
She cracked her eyes open again. The tiger was still there, sitting next to her and watching her.
Er...
What was it waiting for?
Permission?
Huh. Maybe that was an idea.
Alright, Katxiel. You can do this!
Swallowing hard to wet her mouth and whet her nerves, Katxiel moved slowly and dizzily to sit up. Her stomach lurched nauseously and her head pounded, but she managed to prop herself up onto her elbows before she tired too much. "It's okay, Mister Tiger. Or...maybe Miss? I'm sorry, I don't...I can't really tell. But it's okay. You can eat me, now. Just, please, make it quick, okay? I don't really like pain." And then she blinked, for through the haze and slight delirium, she finally looked down and realized why she was suddenly so cold.
"...Why am I naked?"
His head turned to watch her as she sat up but did nothing to hinder or help her. A deep huff and crinkling of his nose and whiskers indicated however how much he thought about being called 'Miss.' He was very much male thank you very much. And eat her? Well that would just be counterproductive after going through all that effort to save her. Did humans always want to die quite this much? The other offerings had been similar but at least some of them used to beg and plead for the OPPOSITE. Not this one though, no this one just had to be...odd.
Fintan sighed again, lumbering to his feet so that he could retrieve the discarded, soaking wet remains of her clothes and dragging them back to plop with a wet splat beside her in answer to her query. With that out of the way he dipped his head lower to sniff at her wrists. It seemed the mud was working, he didn't detect any fresh blood. At least that was one problem handled. Now to get her strong enough to be mobile so he could herd her off to another village and be done with her already.
Did humans always have to be so loud?
Still, the tiger did not eat her.
In fact, instead it went and plopped the soaking, torn remains of her clothes beside her.
Katxiel stared at them for a moment, eyebrows rising in bafflement. How...what? It didn't make sense. It wasn't like her clothes could just fall off. Maybe he had dragged her and they had torn off? Except she didn't have any other scratches or bruises that she could feel, except for a spot on the top of her head that felt like she'd bumped it. So how on earth...?
The tiger lowered its massive head to sniff her wrists, and she flinched and bit her tongue. Yet the action also drew attention to them—and she could see that she hadn't bled out because there was mud caked on them.
Wait a minute...
A tiger couldn't do that, could it?
And then it hit her in a brief flash of hazy memory: the sensation of being carried, light flickering in her vision as she faded in and out, and the quickest glimpse of a man with fire in his hair.
Katxiel flushed, stiffening, and tried to push herself up so she was sitting. "Wait..."
It brought her ruined clothes to her when she remarked on her nudity. And what was with the man? Was there a man with the tiger?
Or—even crazier—was the tiger the man?
She felt like she was going crazy. Maybe the tea was still doing something to her still. She stared at the tiger and cleared her throat. "You can understand me, can't you?" And then, deciding she had nothing to lose, added, "I...remember a man. Was that, uh, you?"
She had officially lost her mind.
Fintan stared at her completely unenthused for a long while before very obviously rolling his eyes with a huff and a single half-hearted nod of his head. A heavy paw pushed down on her chest then urging her to lay flat again. Maybe she'd suddenly fall back asleep? Blessed silence could return? Maybe?
Taking in the state of her it seemed she was recovering despite the weakness as her heart still thrummed strongly against the large, warm pads of his paw. He'd kept her warm with his own body heat so she did not go into shock. Eventually he'd have to feed her but she seemed alright for the moment and wasn't complaining so he wasn't going to fuss with that quite yet. He'd rather wait until she was asleep again just to keep from having to deal with her attempting to run off and get herself and him killed in the process. He put far too much effort into her already. He was not above eating her if she died but he would definitely be pissed about it if she did.
He nodded.
And even rolled his eyes!
Those were not the actions of a mere beast—this was the tiger god she had seen as she faded in and out, the vision she thought was a glimpse of paradise. Surely he knew what he had to do, then? Surely he knew how this worked!
But before she could speak, he pushed her back down, and she had no energy or strength to resist. She flopped back down, and the world spun even though she had stopped.
"Hey, wait..." She wanted to get back up again, but the first time had spent everything she had and the world wouldn't stop moving. Her head felt heavy and so did her eyes, but gods it felt good to lay back down and shut them. "So...then you heard me," she murmured, voice fading. "You have to...eat me..."
She was out again.
You have to eat me.
Fintan could not help but stare at the wall across from him with the ultimate of dead fish stares. 'Keep trying my patience and maybe I will. My luck you'll taste like trash though,' he thought as he attempted to reign in his patience. Only once her protests died off though did he look down at her and remove his paw. The tiger leaned in close practically nose to nose with her as he sniffed and felt for her breath. Still breathing, but slow and steady. She was out once more. Bless the Great Hunter.
He readjusted the furs so some covered her and kept her dry and warm before surveying his work. It would have to do. Pacing out of his den he was careful to observe his surroundings before making a hasty exit. A massive fallen branch was next dragged in front of the den just to keep anything from getting too opportunistic and hopefully should she wake, to keep her from running off and making his day worse.
A cool drink back at the river where he'd first saved her he perked his ears up listening on a swivel for which lucky animal would serve as his fuel. The brush parted as something large came his way across the bank and he lowered himself to the ground, the shadows of the jungle floor camouflaging his stripped fur easily. It seemed he was not the only beast in need of quenching his thirst as a massive water buffalo and a bull at that trod up to quench his own thirst.
The Great Hunter was most assuredly smiling down upon Fintan to grant him such an opportunity. He was not about to waste it either. His haunches rippled in preparation of the pounce. From this angle he not only would have to leap across the river but also latch onto the beast's throat without getting gored by the horns. It could have been better odds, but the challenge was deeply appreciated. And with that, he leaped.
Katxiel had no idea how long she was out.
Eventually, though, she woke again and found she was alone.
Katxiel's body ached, especially her wrists, and her belly ached with hunger. Not that that mattered—she didn't need to eat, for she would be gone soon. At least, that was how this was supposed to work! Maybe the tiger just wasn't hungry yet and was saving her for later? That was a little rude, though, drawing things out like this. Before, she had never really given much thought to her own mortality—at first because her death seemed so far in the future and there was no point worrying, and then because if she did think about it she would worry.
Now here she was, ready to go, having spent months preparing herself mentally and teaching herself to let go—
And he was taking his sweet time.
She took a deep breath and struggled to sit up. The world still pitched woozily, but not as severely as before. Where had he gone?
A thought snuck in unbidden. One she wished didn't: what if he just left her? What if he never came back and she just starved to death slowly? What if—?
There came a dragging sound from just outside the cave. Katxiel stilled, going quiet so she could listen, and when the tiger came through the opening of their little cave—
It was a water buffalo! He had a water buffalo in his jaws and it was dead, its head lolling lifelessly, glassy eyes still open, and blood smeared all along its throat and the jaws of the tiger.
Despite herself, she let out a hoarse shriek.
Fintan's head snapped up at the sound of her screeching, the dead beast falling from his jaws. Hackled up and fur on end his keen eyes scanned the cave searching for what threat ailed her before whipping around to check behind him. Nothing.
Turning back to her he stared at her unimpressed and huffed loudly. An annoyed shake of his head and he resumed dragging the carcass deeper into his den before returning to the entrance and pulling the branch back to obscure it once more, his ears pinned flat against his skull in hopes of drowning out the shrieking.
Was food truly that abhorrent? What was wrong with this one? Why were humans so strange? Great Hunter preserve him, he didn't know how much more of her oddness he could take. She was far more likable dying.
Katxiel clapped a hand over her mouth, but the sight of that dead and bloody creature was truly horrifying. And nooo! He was carrying it inside! Why was he bringing it inside? Why did he have it at all—
Oh.
Well.
That was obvious, wasn't it?
Tigers ate water buffalo.
Wait a minute.
As the shock of the grisly scene wore off, the tiger huffing in a way that was so clearly irritation, Katxiel's tired brain started to function again. There was something very wrong about this picture, aside from the obvious grossness of it all...
"Ummm...what's that for...?" she asked slowly, and cleared her throat. "Why did you go hunt when you already have me?"
Fintan paused in grooming the blood from his face and paws to give her a long-suffering stare before rolling his eyes again and resuming. Eating her was becoming more and more tempting just to cease the annoyance that she was but realistically speaking she was of no sustaining value to him and as soon as she was fed he'd have her on her way to some village where she would be safe and cared for to marry and make a hoard of future morons.
Once clean enough, he got up to pad closer. First he sniffed at her wrists, still not bleeding so the mud was holding and working. Next, he leaned right into her face practically nose to nose with her his hot breath fanning over her face as his ears twitched listening for her heartbeat and feeling for her breath against his sensitive whiskers. If she proved to be in good enough health then he could feed her and be done with it already. The plan was as easy as breathing.
He rolled his eyes at her! Again! What?!
Katxiel felt many confusing emotions from that--like, she was kind of offended, for one, which was an odd thing to feel as a result of a ferocious beast refusing to eat you. Was he seriously going to toy with her like this? Had all the other offerings been played with? She supposed he was a cat, but it was still...well...rude. She expected more from her gods!
Maybe she had been hasty in her judgment, though, because then he was in her face and sniffing her, and as much as she was ready and willing, she was still only human, with mortal fears. Going nose to nose with a tiger was enough to get anyone's heart racing. She froze up, going still as a mouse, his hot breath tickling her skin and raising goosebumps all over. Was this finally it? Would he do it? What was he waiting for?!
She trembled, hating this, hating that she wanted this and yet every instinct screamed against it, making her seize up like prey. She wasn't brave; she just had no other choice.
She had lived her whole life for this purpose. She had never needed to think about a life beyond this day. What else did she have?
With a deep breath, Katxiel closed her eyes; he could probably hear her heart-rate spiking. "Please, my God...stop playing with me," she managed to get out, swallowing. "End this. Please. Just a quick bite, that's all it takes, right? You killed a buffalo! My neck's a lot smaller than that..."
She was going to die from sheer stress! And she wasn't certain that counted.
At this rate his eyes would roll right out of his head with the number of times she said something completely nonsensical. Fintan let out a long suffering sigh as his head came to fall heavy upon her breastbone. Her heart rate was elevated likely by his presence but still seemed a bit thready. It seems his guest would require an extra evening of rest, how fortunate for him to have the honor of playing host for much longer.
He peeked a single eye open at her directives looking absolutely less than thrilled before huffing and shaking his head at her. Instead the tiger got back to his paws and tore off an entire leg to drag over to her. Next came dry sticks and finally he spat out a stone he had seen the humans use to make the dancing heat they used on their meat. Humans, he had found were quite picky about how they ate their food and he had no doubt for as whiny as this one was she'd be even worse than the previous rescued stray.
Katxiel felt she might actually puke.
The tiger tore an entire leg off the corpse and dragged the gory thing over to her while she could only watch in horror, her face going pale and belly twisting nauseously. It was a twofold reaction: for one, she had never done well with gore in the first place, and for two...if he could do that to a buffalo, just tear off a leg with all those wet ripping sounds and the crack of joints separating...how easy would it be to do the same to her?
Katxiel swallowed hard, staring at the dismembered limb before shifting a look to the stone and sticks. Did he want her to...?
Oh gods.
Why?! Was he trying to fatten her up or something?
She covered her mouth with her hand, looking to the tiger to avoid the bloody mess he had brought her. "Um...no thank you?" she managed to say, voice a little thick as she swallowed down nausea.
Fintan huffed and tilted his head first in confusion and then in exasperation. Why must she be so picky? WHY could she not just shut up and accept the wonderful gift he had just presented her? Was it really that hard?
The more he thought about it, the angrier he got. He had saved her life! She just wanted to be a lazy human?! Fine. The tiger shifter growled deep and low, his head lowered as he glared up at her. The growl reverberated louder as he lowered further to nudge the stone closer to her insistently. He was going to ensure she was fed one way or another.
Those growls sent a primal shiver down Katxiel's spine, not to mention that feline glare that looked like he wanted to murder her--which, yes? Please? Get it over with!
But then he was nudging the stone closer, and Katxiel let out a sigh of exasperation. "I can't," she said, paling as she stole another look at the dismembered leg. "Even if I wanted to, I can't. I-I don't know how to use that!"
A deep long-suffering sigh and Fintan sank to his belly, all four paws splaying out before and behind him. So humans required specific abilities to make the warm dancing light. Not just any of their kind could do it and of course he had managed to find the dud of the group. This was just his luck.
Fine. If she didn't want to make the light and cook her food she could eat it raw like him. Grabbing the shorn leg, with a twist of his neck he was able to fling it directly into her lap. Looking from the meat to her he growled again in warning. She better not protest now. This was a perfectly good, healthy kill! Any tigress would be deeply impressed with his hunting skill. Figures a human wouldn't know good food if it literally smacked her in the face.
SPLAT.
A gooey, bloody, mangled leg flopped into Katxiel's lap, and she let out a scream and reflexively threw it back at him before she was even aware she was doing it. Dizzy and wobbly, she bolted to her feet, swaying dangerously and not caring as the furs fell off of her, because oh dear GODS—!
"That was not okay!" It was supposed to be a commanding yell, but it came out as more of a weak croak. "I don't want it! I won't eat it! I—ooh." A wave of dizziness sent her crumpling back to her knees, holding her head with one hand. "Stop playing with me!"
If tigers were capable of displaying the full range of disgust and displeasure Fintan was currently experiencing his furry face certainly would have had it written across it in spades. An angry snarl exploded from deep within his chest though as the food was hurled back into his face.
Ungrateful wretch!
Served her right as he watched her drop to her knees again. The tiger sat back on his haunches, tail flicking angrily as he continued to stare and huff repeatedly. She left him no choice. She wouldn't eat and if she wouldn't eat then she would grow weaker and sicker and die and her meat would be spoiled in that case, not at all worth consuming for all his wasted time and energy.
Mind made up, he rose quickly and pounced. Her ankle was caught in his powerful jaws before he turned literal tail and began to waddle drag her out of the cave and towards the nearest water source.
This was a nightmare! She was supposed to have died when she was peacefully unaware, but instead her God saw fit to torture her for whatever reason! She'd been dragged to a cave, had body parts thrown at her, and now--
The tiger pounced, and Katxiel screamed. Logic told her this was what was supposed to happen, that he was supposed to attack and end her, but every survival instinct in her body fired off in defiance--Gods help her, she did not want to die. She tried to throw herself aside, but her body was still weak and sluggish, and she only managed to flop over before the tiger caught her ankle in his jaws, those massive fangs wrapped around her. It wouldn't take much to crush every bone there, but instead he started to drag her somewhere, and Katxiel felt something inside her snap. All the fear and grief she had tried so hard to keep at bay came crashing down all at once.
She struggled and clawed at the ground, breaking her once manicured and lacquered nails, and kicked feebly with her other leg, crying out and struggling as much as she could. The ground scratched at her naked body and she must have hit every rock and bush along the way, but she hardly cared as she fought like a feral thing, sobs catching in her throat.
What was normally a few short minutes walk felt like an eternity as he slowly dragged her to the river. As it was, they did not even make it to the banks before she kicked true and he was suddenly howling, her ankle released from his fanged mouth as he whipped around to look at her in pained, betrayal. The tiger huffed and puffed in before glancing down between his legs to see if he was still intact or bled. Fortunate for her, he was well or else he would quickly reconsider if she looked tasty enough.
Fintan glared at her once more before sitting down on his haunches and crumbling into a tight furry ball. She could run or drown for all he cared. Scream to the top of her lungs even, perhaps his brother would come around and eat her instead. He'd been nothing but accommodating. And this was how she repaid his kindness? By crushing his most delicate organs? Rot! Curse the human, he needed his rest.
Her foot hit something that made the tiger suddenly release her, uttering sounds she had never before heard a tiger make--not that Katxiel had been around any tigers before this. With a whimper, she scrambled away from him, but not far. She was too tired and hurt to get anywhere and besides...it wasn't like she could ever go back anyway.
How could she ever? How could she go home a failure? Who failed so hard that they couldn't get a wild tiger, a fierce apex predator known for eating humans, to kill them?! Was it even possible to be so bad at dying? To be rejected so harshly by the gods?
Scratched up and filthy now with leaves and dirt in her hair and mud caked on her naked body, Katxiel curled up opposite the tiger, hugging her knees to her chest. She stared at the beast even as he stared balefully at her, curled up in a strange way. (Had she kicked his belly that hard?) She sniffled, wiping fruitlessly at her eyes, feeling stupid for her tears but unable to stop them now that they had begun.
"I'm sorry," she muttered, pressing her face into her knees. "I didn't mean to hurt you. I just...I don't understand what I'm doing wrong."
Fintan huffed several times, whiskers twitching in deep displeasure before finally dragging himself up into an upright seated position and walk-crawling forward where his upper body was walking normal but his lower body was as close to the ground as possible. She wasn't going to be given a second opportunity to catch him off-guard. Instead he moved close and rested his chin on her arms, looking up at her softly, while keeping very still.
Katxiel didn't know what she expected. Actually, she had zero expectations at this point because nothing had gone as planned. Still, when the tiger did that awkward half walk, half crawl over to her, it was so ridiculous that it surprised her enough to cut through her self-pity. A laugh bubbled up amongst the sobs and she swiped at her eyes again, feeling both like she was losing her mind and a little validated that this had to be some sort of cosmic joke.
Closer and closer he moved, and she held still and watched him, having given up on trying to predict what he was doing. A heavy, furry chin rested on her arms then, and she blinked at him to clear her blurred vision, peering into his eyes even though she had been told one should never do that with a predator.
Not like it mattered. He didn't seem keen to eat her, and now he was just...watching.
With a deep, sniffling breath, Katxiel finally looked away. "What do you want?"
Fintan stared back eye to eye with her unchallenged with the eyes of an intelligent and perhaps even wise beast. At her question though he took pity on her a bit again. It was not her fault she was so slow and dull-witted. He closed his eyes and presses his forehead up against hers giving soft nuzzles and little huffs before more boldly brushing against her cheeks and shoulders like a cat marking her with his scent. Perhaps this would cheer her up a bit or at least make her more complacent with the idea of traversing to the water.
What the...?
The tiger was suddenly rubbing his head against her like an oversized house cat. Katxiel froze up, at first with tension and nerves--and then, much to her horror, fresh tears welled up and made the world go underwater again.
Unable to help herself, she threw her arms around the tiger's neck and clung to him, face buried in his neck as she dampened his fur, shoulders shaking. She was tired, she was confused, she was never more alone, and didn't know what to think anymore. As much as she was trying to be strong and brave, in that moment she felt her resistance shatter as she crumpled. It was stupid, it was embarrassing, and yet she couldn't help but cling to his warmth and affection.
"Why?" she muttered against him, still holding tight. "Why are you like this?"
Fintan rumbled deeply as he nuzzled more against the human currently clinging to him. Her questions however illicit an unintentional snort and shoulder shake as he laughed at her. Why indeed? His brother certainly would be horrified to see the sight of him comforting a human instead of consuming or driving her away. He didn't really have an answer to it though, and honestly he didn't really care to think about it. The shifter simply did what he wanted and what he wanted was to not have humans on his lands disrupting his home.
Sitting up straighter onto his hindquarters, Fintan lifted off his front paws to wrap around her back, dragging the frail girl against his furry belly and chest in a claw-free tiger hug to let her cry it all out. It was a vast improvement if nothing else that she was no longer screaming or kicking. If she returned to the striking though he would not hesitate to take excessive force to avoid being wounded again.
Wh...what the...?
The tiger shifted and put his paws on her, pulling her in, and Katxiel let out a surprised gasp as she sank deeper into a...hug? Was the tiger hugging her? Katxiel blinked in surprise, her sobs quieting, and slowly the tension eased out of her as she let herself slump against him in resigned silence.
She couldn't even begin to understand any of this. Tigers didn't hug people (unless they were clinging to them while eviscerating them, she supposed). But there were no claws involved here, and even stranger, all this time the tiger behaved like he could understand her, responding to her words with huffs and snorts and almost human body language. It made sense to her in a way; he was a god, was he not?
Except...
She rubbed her face against his fur, letting out a tired, defeated laugh. "Maybe you're the wrong god."
Fintan huffed and shook in laughter. Wrong god indeed. Oh how simple his life would be if he really was a good. He could just eject her right into the new village and not have to worry about getting her nourished enough to be back on her feet.
He nuzzled against her head more in a very cat-like fashion before cautiously attempting to pull away and take her wrist in his mouth. An equally gentle tug at the appendage followed as he attempted to once more lead her the rest of the way to the river if she would only cooperate with him.
The tiger moved away them--and then took her wrist in his mouth. Not to bite off her hand, but just to give it a tug, as though wanting to lead her. Katxiel was too tired to argue. And what options did she have, anyway? She was stuck out here with a tiger who refused to eat her. She had failed. She couldn't go home, but home was all she knew.
And so, tiredly, she rose to her feet and followed where he lead, her suspicions confirmed by his reaction.
He was the wrong god.
She had gotten the wrong god.
For a few moments she was quiet as she walked, biting her cheek as the thought tumbled in her head. Then, finally, she broke the silence. "Do you...know where the other tiger god is?"
Fintan snort huffed in amusement much like a soft laugh. Other god indeed. If only she had met his brother, oh how she'd be begging and screaming and sobbing for life then. Still the idea of him as a god tickled him deeply. How easy life would be if only that were true! No more whining little girls that's for sure.
He huffed again as he led her right to the water's edge and dropped her hand. Fintan plunged right into the river, rolling and swimming about to comfortably cool off and wash off without a care in the world for what she would do now.
She would take that as a no.
Katxiel sighed as she watched the tiger swim about with not a care in the world, her arms crossed over her chest. Well. She supposed she may as well get clean, if she was going to be stuck here for a while. And clothes! What was she supposed to do about that, since the tiger had so helpfully ripped them to pieces? She wasn't supposed to be alive still to worry about things like that!
She dipped a toe into the water, found it pleasantly cool, and stepped in all the way fast to get over the shock as quickly as possible. She ducked under the water and came back up for breath, hair a dark veil over her face before she parted it like a curtain.
It felt nice, the cool water soothing against her wounds and washing away her sweat and dirt. She washed herself as best as she could with just her hands, wrinkling her nose as her toes touched the muddy bottom. How was she going to do this? She couldn't live like this: naked, no food, bathing in rivers like some sort of wild woman. She couldn't go home. And this tiger was no help at all! But...maybe he could be?
Frowning, she scrubbed under an armpit. "You can't talk, but I know you can understand me so...maybe...maybe you could take me to the right tiger? I'll be out of your hair then. Or, uh, fur? I mean, I know you don't like this any more than I do, so..."
The water was soothing to body, mind, and soul. Fintan felt his earlier frustrations melting away with the heat and grime of the day. His demeanor became almost playful as he splashed about and lapped at the water.
Eventually he swam closer to rub his sides up against her body, hoping to provide some similarly soothing comfort to the furless wonder. Her words though caused him to instantly freeze and side-eye her some. He had been caught. His eyes darted side to side a bit as if trying to decide whether it was worth it to try and pretend he hadn't understood her all along.
With a shrug and a huff, Fintan decided there was no use hiding it. The right tiger? Oh yes, bringing her to his brother would certainly make things all the better. He'd bite her head off, she'd die for nothing, and he'd have wasted his precious time trying to keep her alive. Perfectly foolproof!
Fintan rolled his eyes and shook his head, sending water droplets spraying every which way. His wordless answer was clear. Absolutely not. She could go die on her own time AFTER he delivered her to the village.
"What do you mean, 'no'?!" Katxiel blurted as she angrily swiped at the water spray, stiffening. Oh, she had picked up on his signals, all right; he did not behave like a normal tiger with his all too human body language. Which was to be expected, considering he was a god. But that outright confirmed it! He even had the nerve to—
"And don't roll your eyes at me!" Then her own eyes widened and she slapped both hands over her mouth. Oh gods. Had she really been driven to this point? Was she really talking back to a god?
"A-ah...sorry, I didn't mean it, I just—I'm trying really hard to understand, here! You won't take me to the right god, but you won't accept my sacrifice, so...so what, exactly? What am I doing wrong?" She couldn't help it as the frustration boiled over and poured out. "Are you just going to keep me?"
Fintan raised a cat-like brow at her before chuffing at her outbursts. The water was truly doing wonders for his temper as well as her confidence it seemed. A god? He certainly was superior to her but he wouldn't go that far. He tilted his head, watching her while contemplating the question before shrugging again and moving his head in non-committal agreement.
Hoping out of the water he shook himself hard, spraying more water and puffing up like a spiky ball before flicking his tail at her and peeking over his shoulder to see what she would do.
Katxiel ran her fingers through her hair and clutched the strands, tugging at her scalp. This tiger was going to drive her to madness! To her in that moment, clouded by frustration, this seemed a fate worse than death—to be kept as a tiger-god's pet, too unworthy of an offering.
"Fine!" she huffed, splashing out of the water and swaying a little as she walked, still weak from her ordeal. "Then if you won't, I guess I'll just have to do it myself!"
She inwardly cringed at how petulant that sounded, but oh well! Splashing out of the water, she turned to face the jungle and started to march away from the tiger. Naked. Cold. And utterly clueless.
Fintan shook the water from his head and snort huffed at her. Sure she'd get real far without any of her fur, starving, and without any sense of direction.
A low, gravelly rumble sounded from his chest moments before he heaved his massive form out of the water. A waterfall practically ran off his fur as he splashed onto the shore and dripped all the way in irritated pursuit of her.
She rejected his efforts at every turn. Half the others he had saved hadn't been this stubborn. Why her? Why HIM? So much complaining. And now she wanted to add running into the mix too? Why he ought to bite her!
Taking in the pale, bouncing flesh right at eye level with him was certainly not helping matters. Impulsiveness won out the closer he approached though. With no warning whatsoever, he opened his mouth and clamped down on own cheek, halting suddenly and holding on to keep her from moving. A deep growl reverberated against her skin as an extra warning to not fight him or meet the fate she so desperately seemed to want.
The squeal that came out of her startled a small flock of parrots from their trees, sending them fluttering skyward in a flurry of feathers and indignant squawks.
HE BIT HER.
Was actively BITING HER.
On the BUTT.
A full-body jerk went through her, nearly sending her leaping out of her skin--if she wasn't being held firmly in place by tiger jaws clamped onto her cheek. The blood rushed to her face in pure mortification, more emotionally wounded than physically, and she twisted around to stare aghast at him, mouth dropped open. "What are you--LET GO! That is SO inappropriate! Or--or just eat me! Or something! Make up your mind, please!"
But then she froze, a thought coming to her as soon as she said it, a memory of predator kills she had seen and the way some of them ate their prey haunches first...sometimes while they were still alive...
She blanched, biting her lip. "Or...just...listen. Can we just...I dunno, talk this out or something? Not that you talk, but..." She scrubbed a hand over her face.
He would have laughed if he did not have a mouth full of meat he was actively trying not to eat. And she said that he couldn't make up his mind. All her begging for him to just eat her and now when she had no reason to suspect that this was in fact what he was doing and suddenly she was begging for him to not too. Oh these furless ones were all the same and oh so weird.
With her now at his mercy he used his grip on her to direct her in marching back to his den. Any protests fell on deaf ears. He literally flicked them back flat against his skull to ignore her. Perhaps he should just take her back to the village now as he had intended? Now that would be a sight; a tiger fearlessly marching a human absolutely naked from the jungle into view!
Yeah, on second thought he'd end up with a coat full of arrows and that certainly didn't sound like a good time. Maybe he could just eat her after all? Nah, based on the literal mouthful he had, she was not going to be worth the effort.
Fintan huffed, his whiskers brushing her backside as he shook his head ever so slightly, forgetting that this would in turn make her hips shake as well.
No response. Not that she had been expecting one, since he was a tiger. Instead, she was soon being marched along back toward the den and considering his hold on her butt and those teeth holding on, she had no choice but to move where he directed her.
"Oh come on, really?!"
This was...so beyond humiliating. Katxiel flushed, her skin hot clear down her chest, and stared at the ground as she stumbled along. She only had an audience of one—a bloody tiger!—but it was still absolutely mortifying being lead around with a mouth on her bottom! Why her? Why this? What deity had she pissed off so completely that this would be her fate instead of eternity?
Her woe-is-me thoughts cut off when he shook his head—and if she hadn't been in the middle of taking a step, it might have done nothing more than throw her off a little. Instead, she pitched over with a surprised yelp, throwing out a hand—and grabbing onto one of his ears.
And just like that he released his hold on her rear to let loose an ear-splitting yowl of pain. Fintan shook his head sharply, hoping to get her to release the soft, highly-sensitive cartilage she had decided to manhandle. He backed away from her, yowling again before baring his teeth and hissing at her in warning to not do it again.
How dare she! Why he ought to be done with it and eat her right then and there for the insult alone. He wouldn't even give her the grace of a quick death at this point. No. He'd eat her alive. Go ahead and run little girl. I dare you. Give me a reason to gobble you up.
"A-ah! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Katxiel quickly said, waving her hands apologetically as a sudden spike of fear shot through her. It was a strange feeling, really. She wanted him to kill her--right? And yet the sight and sound of an angry, full-grown tiger snarling and hissing and baring all those sharp, massive teeth sent a primal wave of terror through her as instinct overrode logic.
She knew it was what had to happen. What she wanted to happen. But oh gods how her heart was racing as everything in her wanted to run. She shrank back from him, wincing, her mouth bone dry. Calm down, calm down, he wasn't a normal tiger, remember? He was a god. He could understand her.
Slowly, she drew in a shaky breath. "I-I didn't mean to, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you, I--" Wait a second. She paused, a frown creasing her face. "Really, it was an accident, but to be fair you did bite my butt! That kind of hurt too, you know!"