Crossroads

[Paladienne]

"It's still good," Tourmaline replied, offering Citrine a small smile. He glanced around the fire, noticing that conversation had resumed and it was now at a more normal level than whispers, and he turned his gaze to the fire while he ate. "I don't mean to cause so much trouble, you know. I don't want to be a bother or a burden to you or your clan."

He spooned some of the porridge into his mouth to quiet himself, simply rolling the soft food around on his tongue for a while before swallowing. He didn't know what else to say to Citrine, who'd shown nothing but kindness to him. What could he say, anyway? As soon as he was healed enough, he would be leaving, so he didn't want to get too familiar with Citrine or anyone else from the clan. He was afraid that if he did, it would make the parting that much more painful. Or, worse, he wouldn't be able to leave at all.

He glanced at Citrine. "If there are duties I'm keeping you from... you can attend them. I'm not going anywhere."

[DragonSong]

Citrine blinked. "What? Ah, no. No, don't worry about that, it--" He cleared his throat and lowered his head to shovel a few bites of breakfast into his mouth, forcing himself to just collect his thoughts and not act like a gibbering idiot, which seemed to be about all he could do with Tourmaline.

Swallowing, he cleared his throat and tried to clarify, "The Elder gave me some time to...take care of you? I suppose? I mean, seeing as Blue and I are the ones who...found you, however you wanna say it. And she, ah--" He cleared his throat again, a little more awkwardly this time, "She doesn't...really want you in the camp unsupervised. So, um...you're stuck with me? Just while you're here, I mean."

[Paladienne]

Tourmaline nodded. He completely understood about strangers being unsupervised. It was what his own elder decreed when a stranger entered their village and wished to stay for a time. It wasn't discouraged, the staying part, just the part about the stranger wandering around without an escort. It wasn't unusual for the warriors whose duty it was to protect the village to attack a stranger who was without their escort. Tourmaline had seen it happen a couple of times when he was small, but the village rarely got visitors that stayed for longer than a night or two.

He ate in silence, cleaning his bowl with his fingers when the spoon would no longer do its job. Then he set the bowl down before him and sighed.

Tourmaline looked toward Citrine then and offered him a smile. "I don't think of it as being stuck with you. It's nice being able to talk with someone different from myself. To learn from others. I'm... just sorry it's this way." He laughed a little, somewhat self-deprecatingly. "If I could move around on my own, I guess it wouldn't be such an imposition on you to keep to my pace."

[DragonSong]

"Oh, hey, well--it's sorta my fault anyway." Citrine tried for a smile but it was awkward and sort of flickering at the edges. He'd been thinking about it since the previous night, and if he didn't say anything it was just going to make him feel even more ill at ease...if that was even possible at this point.

With a huff, he shook his head and flicked his ears back against his skull, glancing away. "You wouldn't have fallen if I hadn't startled you back there. I mean, I wasn't trying to, I just thought--doesn't matter. My fault, I just...wanted to apologize."

He rubbed at the back of his neck, the tip of his tail twitching slightly through the earth behind him.

[Paladienne]

"It's okay," Tourmaline replied with a chuckle. He looked away from Citrine and to the fire again, an easy smile on his face. It lessened a bit when he realized he was showing a bit of his fangs, so he angled his head a bit so his hair fell in front of his face, obscuring it. "I'm also kind of clumsy, so it isn't entirely your fault."

He finally looked at Citrine with a smile. "Don't worry so much about it. I'll be fine in a little while, and you won't even remember what it was like having me around. So, it's okay. And I've learned quite a bit about your tribe and your kindness, so I have quite the story to tell when I get back home."

[DragonSong]

Citrine smiled slightly in return, though he titled his head and furrowed his brow a bit in confusion when Tourmaline turned his head away. He had a nice smile, why did he want to hide it?

Alright, that wasn't any of his business. Stop thinking about it.

Then his expression fell slightly and he tilted his head further. "Well, that...I mean, I'm sure you're anxious to be on your way, but...I don't know if I'd want to forget what it's like to have your around. You're the most interesting thing that's happened around here in years."

[Paladienne]

The truth was, Tourmaline wasn't yet anxious to be on his way, and he did want to stay and observe this clan some more, but he didn't want to impose, and he didn't want to cause trouble. Yet he didn't say any of this to Citrine, only smiling at his words and lifting his shoulders in a shrug.

"I don't know if you will forget." he said at last. "I'm kind of memorable."

He chuckled at the expense of himself, his eyes falling to the blue and pink scales that dusted his body. He certainly wasn't easy to forget, considering his coloring. All the same, Tourmaline was sure the rest of the tribe would be more comfortable knowing he was gone and that he wouldn't be coming back. Still, even if they looked back on their memories of him with some kind of fondness, then that was just fine. Good, even. He didn't want to burden the tribe with any trouble he might cause.

"Well, I certainly won't forget your kindness." Tourmaline said, turning his head to look at Citrine with a close-lipped smile. "And who knows, maybe one day we might meet again. Wouldn't that be something?"

[DragonSong]

Citrine found himself chuckling quietly, and before he could stop himself he murmured, "Not sure if I actually could forget you."

Flushing, he quickly dropped his eyes again and started shoveling his breakfast into his mouth. When Tourmaline looked back at him again he swallowed quickly and gave a bit-too-eager nod. "Um, yeah. Yes. I--I'd like that."

He didn't bother saying that the chances of them actually meeting again once Tourmaline left were slim, if they existed at all. He didn't know much about the other kulshedra's tribe, but he'd gleaned that they weren't exactly big on people traveling, at least not once they'd completed this sort of sabbatical or whatever it was Tourmaline was currently doing.

And he...well. He knew what his life would be. In all likelihood, he'd spend the rest of his life fighting this war--and he had no idea how long the rest of his life would really be. Their enemy were desperate, they needed their Fire, and his own people would defend it to their last breath.

[Paladienne]

Tourmaline smiled, though it didn't quite reach his eyes. Talking about what could be was quite fun, despite knowing how disappointing it was that it would never be. He didn't know what his future would be like, only that there would come a day where this part of his life would be over, and his place would be to remain in the village, doing whatever job the village elder and the Flame chose for him to do. The adventuring was a short-lived experience, but the memories of it were something that Tourmaline would treasure for the rest of his life.

He looked toward the fire, uncertain of how to continue the conversation with Citrine. There wasn't much the two could talk about, and Tourmaline felt it was safer not to get overly familiar with the other Kulshedra. He didn't know how far to pry in Citrine's life, and certainly he didn't want to dredge up any bad memories. He could just look around the village and know that these people hadn't had it easy. They had been embroiled in a war with another tribe, and they had become desperate to survive and wary of strangers. He knew how his own village reacted when strangers came in and stuck their noses into business they had no need to be sticking their noses in. And Tourmaline already knew that, as far as Blue and Citrine's cases, many of their tribe were set as warriors and had seen so much fighting already. He didn't want to bring up something that no one wanted to talk about.

Still... that wasn't reason to be sad and down right now, in this moment.

Tourmaline raised his head and looked at Citrine, offering a small grin that showed only the slight edge of a sharpened canine tooth. "So, what is it we're going to today? Besides make me a crutch so you don't have to carry me everywhere?"

[DragonSong]

"Oh. Well..." Citrine shrugged, offering a small smile of his own in return. "I mean, technically I'm not really on duty for anything more than a short patrol or two while you're here, so... Once I gt you set up with a crutch, you're welcome to do whatever you like, really."

He paused, glanced around the fire at the quietly murmuring members of his tribe, a few of them still glancing over at Citrine and Tourmaline with a combination of curiosity and wariness every so often. "...Within reason."

[Paladienne]

"Within reason, huh?" Tourmaline replied with a teasing smile. "So... no walking off without permission, or disappearing without telling anyone first, right? Or are you suggesting something more heinous? Something crazy? Something... strange?"

He didn't know why, but he enjoyed teasing Citrine for some reason, even if it felt strange to do so. There was this odd twisting feeling in his stomach that he'd never felt before as he spoke to Citrine, as he teased the other Kulshedra with a light tone and joking voice. Tourmaline looked away from the other male then and went back to studying the fire.

"If there's anything I can do to help, while I'm here, I'd be glad to do so. After all, you've been so kind to me, allowing me to stay even though you didn't have to." The tip of Tourmaline's tail twitched ever so slightly, betraying his nerves. "I don't want to be a burden."

[DragonSong]

"Ah, th-that's not--I mean I dunno about strange--"

Citrine cut himself off when he realized Tourmaline was teasing him, and it took a bit more self-control than he would have liked--or ever admitted--not to stick his tongue out at the other kulshedra like he would if he was still a child.

Or if it had been Blue, maybe.

He glared, opening his mouth to snip something back, but before he could Tourmaline spoke again and his expression suddenly softened. "Hey, look, you're not a burden or anything--"

"Hey there!"

Citrine started violently as a flash of blue scales and a bright smile abruptly inserted himself between the two of them. "Fires, Blue!" he protested, lurching to the side in an effort not to be knocked off balance entirely by his younger brother. "What the hells are you so energetic about? Didn't you plan on sleeping until noon?"

Blue grinned at him, throwing an arm around his shoulders and conveniently ignoring his older brother's glare. Turning that bright grin on Tourmaline, he shrugged and said, "Eh, guess I wasn't as tired as I thought. Anyway though, you really planning on pitching in around camp?"

Citrine tensed. He had a bad feeling he knew where this was going. "Blue..."

"What?" Blue looked between the two of them, all wide-eyed innocence. "I mean, if he's gonna be here anyway. There ceremony is in less than three days, I bet he'd love to pitch in, see what it's about." He looked to Tourmaline again expectantly. "Right?"

[Paladienne]

"Huh?"

The sound was out of his mouth before Tourmaline could stop it.

He stared at Blue with wide eyes, uncertain of what the young Kulshedra was actually asking. A ceremony? What kind of ceremony? He'd never been involved with a ceremony outside his own tribe. Would they even allow it? Him, an outsider, helping with something that was so special? He couldn't even believe that Blue had said something like that.

It sounded too good to be true.

"Oh, I, uh," Tourmaline felt his cheeks heat as words failed him, his surprise grabbing hold of his tongue and strangling it. He swallowed hard and almost shrank backwards from Blue, as if the distance would allow him to find his words again. "I mean, I don't want to impose. I mean, I know that things like this aren't really... you know... meant for outsiders. I don't want to get anyone into trouble."

He looked over Blue at Citrine, uncertain what Citrine wanted Tourmaline to say. Should he decline? But he wanted to... he wanted to see this ceremony, and he wanted to help. What would the harm be, since he was going to be here anyway? But, he could tell that the offer made Citrine uncomfortable, and for some reason that bothered Tourmaline. He couldn't put his finger on why, but it bothered him. "Would... would it be okay? If... if I helped?"

[DragonSong]

"I, ah--I don't...Well, I--I'm not really sure," Citrine stammered in response, too shocked to do anything but speak truthfully.

He recovered enough to shoot his brother a quick glare, which Blue returned with an innocent smile, then looked to their guest again and shrugged a little helplessly. "I mean...if you want to, I can ask the Elder about it?"

He meant it to be an offer, but it came out more as a question, and yet another wave of heat threatened to dye his cheeks beneath the scales.

[Paladienne]

Tourmaline tried not to let his excitement show on his face. He really tried. But even as a kid he'd never been able to hide his excitement or interest in things, and his eyes lit up with anticipation, a smile spreading across his face before he could stop it. He was practically vibrating in his seat, his fingers clenching around his knees to keep them from making fists. His tail twitched with quick motions, and he felt a shiver run up his spine and down again. His scales lifted up and away from his skin slightly, as if he were getting gooseflesh, and he stiffened slightly.

"W-would you?" Tourmaline ventured, his voice low but still full of anticipatory excitement. "Ci-Citrine, would you ask? Please?"

Tourmaline hoped he didn't sound like he was begging. The last thing he wanted to do was sound like he was begging. If he sounded like he was begging, then it definitely wouldn't happen. In fact, the opposite might happen, and he'd be ostracized before he could even blink. He didn't want that to happen. But he couldn't stop or hide the expression on his face. It was far too late for that. So all he could do was wait in quiet anticipation for Citrine's answer.

[DragonSong]

Oh...hells.

No grown man should look that adorable. It just wasn't fair.

"Um, yeah. Yeah, I can do that. No problem." Citrine heard the words before he even fully realized he had actually said them. He started to scramble to his feet, kicking himself mentally, then once again felt his body move without his conscious decision to do so, pausing to glance back down at Tourmaline.

"Did you, ah...wanna come with me? Or you can wait here with Blue, I'm sure it won't take me that long."

[Paladienne]

Tourmaline blinked at Citrine's offer of joining him to ask the Elder if he could attend the ceremony. Doing so would mean relying on Citrine to walk, and that would mean leaning close to the other Kulshedra. It would also mean that the Elder would have cause to look a little too closely as to why Tourmaline wanted to witness this ceremony, and she might not believe that it was just out of pure curiosity, especially with the trouble that the tribe's enemies had been giving them.

Tourmaline swallowed and tilted his head. "I mean... if you think I should. But... I don't know how your elder would react to me being there when you asked. I mean... she might think I was asking you to do it because of some nefarious purpose or something. That I had other intentions than just curiosity." He dropped his gaze, suddenly regretting his earlier enthusiasm. "Maybe... maybe you shouldn't ask at all. I'm sorry I brought it up."

He winced, trying not to look too disappointed. He didn't want to seem like he was being selfish and ungrateful for Blue and Citrine's offer, but he also didn't want to get them in trouble. He didn't want them to suddenly be scrutinized because of him. Not by people who were looking to them to protect the tribe. He turned his gaze back to the fire and twisted his fingers together, uncertain what to do or say now. He felt embarrassed, foolish, stupid. How could he expect perfect strangers, people he'd only known for little more than a day, to allow him to watch their most sacred of rites and rituals? It didn't matter if he was going to be here during that time. What was sacred shouldn't be violated. Hadn't his elder beat that into his head often enough?

Thoroughly miserable now, Tourmaline kept his gaze on the fire, doing his best to keep his expression neutral so Citrine and Blue wouldn't see how terrible he felt.

[DragonSong]

"Whoa, hey now--"

"Oh don't be like that, it's really no trouble--!"

Both Blue and Citrine started speaking at the same time, stopped, looked at each other, made a few faces at one another that each interpreted correctly as What, do you want me to talk? No, I thought you were-- Oh never mind! before the elder brother huffed out a sharp breath and muttered, "It's really not--it doesn't hurt to just ask. I mostly figured you could come along and make a case for yourself, if you wanted. But if you'd rather not, you can just stay here with Blue."

The younger kulshedra nodded and shrugged, looking at Tourmaline with a sort of gently confused smile. "I mean, unless you don't actually want to stay? You don't have to, of course, it was just an idea..."

[Paladienne]

Tourmaline looked up at Citrine and Blue and tried to give them a small smile. "I want to stay. I want to see the ceremony. But there are sacred things between tribes that shouldn't be shared with outsiders. It's the same way with my tribe. I just... don't want you two getting in trouble for asking. The ceremony is important to you, right? It's important to the tribe? Then I shouldn't be interfering, because what if I mess it up? What if I do something wrong? I... I don't think I could bear it if misfortune fell upon you because of me."

He dropped his gaze again and turned his attention back to the fire. He honestly didn't know what else to say to the brothers, other than to just repeat what he'd said. He felt like a fool, for certain. But he was so grateful to his hosts that he didn't want to risk them, or his budding friendship with them, for something so selfish.

[DragonSong]

"Well, I mean..." Blue looked back and forth between his brother and their guest, a slight frown furrowing at his brow. "It doesn't hurt to ask. The worst Elder can do is say no. She might be a little peeved, but it's not like we'll actually get in trouble or anything."

Citrine shrugged, his attention on Tourmaline. He tried for an encouraging sort of smile. "He's got a point," he muttered, low and a little gruff. Why did he care so much about this? He felt like he was making a bigger deal out of the whole thing than he needed to.

Maybe he was just...out of practice with strangers. Yeah, that made sense.

"Look, I'll just--I'll just ask if it's alright for you to stay, maybe observe, if you want. Worst case scenario, we'll have to shut you up in the hut for the ritual," he tried to joke, smile slanting up to one side.