Breaking Bard [zozee]

[GoblinFae]

"Lady Treyburn," Iorwerth stuttered incredulously. His eyes were wide in shock as his heart seemed to be pounding in his ears. "My dear why did you not tell me sooner? Joff I have been deceived by beauty herself! Quick! Shield your eyes before she casts you under the same spell." So saying he clapped a large hand over the laughing boy's eyes even as he looked at Illi with his own nervous pair. He would need to be extra careful now if he hoped to not be punished for what he was and what he was capable of.

[zozee9]

Illi cocked her head to the side, quite confused by the display that Iorwerth was putting on. She didn't get what he was trying to do... but that didn't mean she couldn't play along!

Gasping, she responded with confidence, "Illi, not Lady Treyburn! Alas, you must be punished—and the young boy, too! After all, you seem like the kind of man that would bear a punishment for himself, but feel terrible for those on others. Hmm... what spell should I cast on you two... Aha! I know! I still haven't eaten. I expect to be taken to the best restaurant in town! You two shall be my guides to make sure I don't get lost, as well as my partners in eating. After all, I can't have any assassins coming after me!"

[GoblinFae]

"Me?" cried the boy, struggling to be free of Iorwerth so he could see. "But I didn't do anything Illi! It's all this big oaf's fault! Count me out! I got nothing to do with this mess!" He squirmed some more before he was finally released. With a childish wink, he was off like a shot, bounding across the road without a care in the world.

Iorwerth shrugged and smiled as he saw him go. "Can't be contained I suppose. Now tell me dear lady, where is the best restaurant in town? I would hate to take you somewhere sub par and offend your delicate being."

[zozee9]

Illi laughed as she watched Joff run off. He looked so happy and content with his life... but was he really? Was anyone in Connlaoth truly happy? The war did little to please anyone except the crazy military people who were in it for money. Even those that wanted honor wouldn't find anything pleasant in killing others. She knew the kids were impacted by it, too. Oh, how she would hate to raise a family in this country. She would have left long ago if it weren't for her many siblings.

Looking up at Iorwerth and putting on a smile that vanquished all of the troubling thoughts within her own head, Illi gleefully responded, "Why, the very same one we were heading to! Actually, I have no idea, but that place still sounds delightful to me. Hopefully it will not offend your delicate being, seeing as mine will be perfectly fine. Maybe there will even be some fine mead for your horse?"

[GoblinFae]

Iorwerth laughed a very horselike laugh as he shook his head. "Well isn't that convenient? Although why my dear lady you would think my being delicate I would know. I have all the strength and grace of a thoroughbred I'll have you know," he boasted, lifting one arm to flex his muscle.

Linking arms with her once more, he began to lead horse and lady both towards their intended destination. "I must say though my dear I strongly advise against providing any mead to Ylli. He really can't hold his liquor and he's a right snobbish pig about it. Why just last week he stole my changepurse and drank the town dry! Can't trust a workhorse I'll tell you. Sneaky lot, they are!"

[zozee9]

OOC: omg why the heck did I say mead? I don't think that's what i meant to say but now I can't remember... is that a reference to something earlier or was it literally just my randomness?
_____

Illi laughed as Iorwerth showed off his muscles and delightedly took his arm. "Oh, but that sounds like a joy to see! A drunken horse would be the spectacle of the whole town... perhaps even the world! You could win your riches and would be able to tell the most intriguing stories. I must say, maybe I'll start my own drunken workhouse business now."

Pointing to the building just ahead, Illi quickly dropped the previous topic and exclaimed, "Oh, there it is! Is there a place for you to leave your horse? Why do you bring her around with you, anyway?" She thought most people left their horses in a stable.

[GoblinFae]

"Believe me, it's the worst idea imaginable. They're a lazy lot and drink only makes them bitter, nevermind the mess! Why you should have seen it when I first found Ylli. Drunk as a skunk out behind some dodgy pub as it were! Invest elsewhere the business is not all it's cut out to be," Iorwerth confided in her solemnly.

Though his expression quickly went from serious to shocked. "My lady don't let Ylli hear you callin' him a her! You'll ruin his reputation and burn his poor ego. After all he's a stallion through and through!"

He avoided answering her question, choosing to express his aghast horror at having part of himself declared as female. That was certainly a first for him.